August

Saturday, August 22, 2015

The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-Coconuts

Since 2002. Published Wednesdays and Saturdays

Submit anything of a positive nature, unless it’s breakthrough stuff to island@bigpinekey.com
(Ed: Although all advertisers’ contracts have expired I’m still going to display their ads for free until they get used to the new CT. Hopefully they will all want to keep advertising.)

national politics an(Click here)
wetstock11--9.6.15Boys and Girls, Ladies and Gentlemen, Children of all ages, Wetstock 11 is two weeks away and all the bands have committed.

This year we will have The Road Warriors, Jam Band Tony with the Karen Weber Band, Jon North & Raisin Cane, and the Myles Mancuso Band.

It will be a great day of  PEACE & MUSIC at Picnic Island coming into Pine Channel.

Take only pictures and leave only foot prints!

See you there, your friend,

Flip Flop Bob

[Audit FKAA] The Blue Paper received a report, claiming “manipulation and interference with data” at FKAA, that raises legitimate questions about millions of dollars worth of water bills sent to FKAA customers throughout the Keys. Link
helen-keller

 

Helen Keller and her beloved cat Mittens.

[Fussies] Remember when you wanted to do something nice for someone, you would make them some food and they’d eat it? Now everyone is so fussy they probably won’t eat what you make and send it back. I’ll eat anything put on my plate if someone gives it to me. It’s a sign of class
trump-toupee
[Windows 10] I wanted to change a couple of defaults in W10. When I Googled the question I got wordy replies telling how complicated & difficult it is. Screen shots to do this & do that. So I hit Control/Esc & typed: hange defaults. There it was! I went to Music & changed it to Windows Media Player & changed photo viewer to MS
Office Picture Manager. Done in a minute.
Green-Parrot-Bingo

 

Another way to support Habitat without swinging a hammer! On Monday, August 31, 7 pm – 9 pm, Green Parrot Bar’s old fashioned Monday Night Bingo will benefit Habitat for Humanity of Key West & Lower Florida Keys. Everyone can play bingo with cards only $1.00 per game! With fun and unusual prizes, a truly great coverall prize and a very special celebrity caller you don’t want to miss this!  To make a prize donation or for more information, feel free to call Habitat at (305) 294-9006 or email Volunteer@HabitatLowerKeys.org

[Cistern] A sign-in sheet at a meeting last week about cistern use was reportedly stolen, spurring the organizer to report it to police given the sheet had the names of the speakers as well as their email addresses, phone numbers and company addresses, according to a Key West police incident report. There were no reported suspects nor arrests, but organizer Richard Lightner III told police he suspects foul play in the matter and was concerned the information may be used maliciously.
computer shakes head

The next meeting of our Big Pine Computer Club is coming up this Saturday, August 22, 10 am at the senior center.  Hope to see you there.

[91% Medical Records Hacked] percentage of health-care organizations that experienced at least one data breach during the last two years. according to research by the Ponemon Institute. The institute found that 40% of health-care organizations had five or more breaches during that same period.
temp75

 

Fed-up landlord.

Motorcyclists can explore the Florida Keys island chain along U.S. Highway 1 during the 43rd annual Phil Peterson’s Key West Poker Run, Sept. 17-20. Participants will travel the 113-mile Overseas Highway from mainland Florida to Key West, crossing 42 bridges and discovering long vistas of breathtaking open water.
zombie surfing

 

Has a date been set for the Big Pine Zombie bike ride? Key West is 10/25, it would be great if the Big Pine ride could be on a different date, I know a lot if us would like to ride in both.

If you’re ready to quit tobacco help is free! Link
1957-Olds-Convertible-Red-White

 

1957 Oldsmobile

August was a pretty expensive month for me and it’s not over yet. However, I went shopping yesterday and (among other things) I bought a pound of delicious roast beef. While checking out, the little red-haired girl noticed that the Deli Dep’t had labeled the roast beef as $612. It should have been $12. A disgusted look came over her like she’d been thru this before and she explained that it was a long, involved process to get it corrected so she rang it up as $1.99. YAAAY! Hooray for me!
pee-on-handle
[Walk Naked In America Day] Please don’t forget next Saturday. Mark your calendar.  I marked mine. As you may already know, it is a sin for a Muslim male to see any naked woman, other than his wife, and if he does, he must commit suicide.

So next Saturday at 1 P.M. Eastern Time, all American women are asked to walk out of their house completely naked to help weed out any neighborhood terrorists. Circling your block for one hour is recommended for this anti-terrorism effort.

All patriotic men are to position themselves in lawn chairs in front of their houses to demonstrate their support for the women and to prove that they are not Muslim terrorist sympathizers.  Since Islam also does not approve of alcohol, a cold 6-pack of beer at your side is further proof of your patriotism.

The American government appreciates your efforts to root out terrorists and applauds your participation in this anti-terrorist activity. God bless America!
If you don’t send this to at least 1 person, you’re a terrorist-sympathizing, lily-livered coward and are possibly aiding and abetting terrorists.

Safety-Officer
Worldwide, July was the hottest month ever!
fart9
[More Government] The State is trying to take away more of boater’s recreational destinations like , the Sandbar, Woman Key and pretty soon Picnic Island. Why don’t they just try to control these places instead of banning them from locals.
kfc-bucket[KFC’s Secret Recipe]
1 teaspoon ground oregano
1 teaspoon chili powder
1 teaspoon ground sage
1 teaspoon dried basil
1 teaspoon dried marjoram
1 teaspoon pepper
2 teaspoon s salt
2 tablespoons paprika
1 teaspoon onion salt
1 teaspoon garlic powder
2 tablespoons Accent (an MSG-based seasoning)
[EPA] Navajo president, Shiprock leaders incensed at dirty crop, livestock water delivered by EPA contractor. Video
shutter39

 

Does anyone have any Miami Dade stamped metal panel shutters that look like this lying around?  Please contact Paige 305-395-0550 if you want to sell some. Thank you.

[Guardrails Should Be Ugly] Has anyone else noticed that instead of aluminum rails they are putting wood fencing along the “treacherous dropoff” sections of the bike path? Someone must not have kept up with their Bubba payments and lost a big contract. Or there may have been a divorce in the family thus eliminating the brother-in- law contractor.
wifi8
[Right To Work] All my life I could never understand why our government is into controlling business. We hired these people to keep our country safe, to maintain our roads, water and food quality, but that’s about it! Who the hell are these suited drones to tell a business owner how to run is shop, how much to pay a worker? If we were under a piece meal system, those that do not produce die off and the rest make a living. If the worker is not making enough, don’t buy the products that produce your pay. Unions? The only union is the sweat off your brow and the fatness of your wallet. The socialist systems are a joke. They create a free giveaway society that never works because as more want more for free, no one is there to produce the items in the factories. Sort of like we are dealing with today in America. All the does is birth more bums. The Amish have it right, you don’t work you don’t eat! And they only have enough kids to fit the land’s output. Smart people, those horse carters
hunting deer dead

 

[Why Bambi Must Die] It had been perplexing, trying to figure out why Rick Scott’s political advisors hadn’t snuffed out an unpopular proposal to allow hunters to stalk half-tame deer, bears, rabbits and squirrels who’ve found refuge in Florida’s state parks. Link

NOAA’s Florida Keys National Marine Sanctuary welcomes Cristal Clear Charters of Key Largo, Florida as the newest participant in the sanctuary’s Blue Star education and conservation program. The sanctuary’s Blue Star program recognizes charter companies that commit to training snorkelers and divers in low impact practices. Research on the Blue Star program, which has been in place since 2009, shows that education helps prevent damaging contact with corals and other marine life
rich king

Key West is among the 20 richest small towns in the nation, according to a recent survey by Bloomberg Business. The city came in at No. 13, based on criteria that included percentage of homes valued at $1 million and higher – 11 percent – a median home value of $381,200 and median annual income of $53,607. Of Key West’s households, 6.5 percent have an annual income of $200,000 or more.

You won’t find any of my information in the hacked Ashley Madison data. But if Pizza Hut, Domino’s or Jimmy John’s get hacked, I’m toast.
abs8

 

[Six-Pack Abs] After years of intense research, Rednecks have discovered how to develop the quickest abs ever

Internet Speed Test] Test your upload and download speeds and make sure you’re getting what you pay for. Link
dog8i[Lost dog in Big Pine Key] Please help, we lost our Roxy. She is a medium brown female mix. Has a white chest, black nose, big pointy ears, and dark eyes. Roxy was lost without her collar on Friday 08/21 in Big Pine Key. She is super sweet and curious about other dogs. We rescued Roxy after witnessing her being thrown out of a car in Miami. My family has dedicated ourselves to Roxy and are truly heartbroken with her gone. Please help us bring her home. Emily Scott (305)562-0520. emilypalenzuela@ymail.com
Anyone out there with an iPhone, try asking Siri what zero divided by zero is!
half mast

 

Here is a question for the FKAA staff who are responsible for the grounds at the pump station at MM 27 oceanside: Why is the flag at half mast? And why has it been that way for several weeks? Inquiring minds want to know.

[Cuba on the Move] Will Grant takes a ride in Cuba to discover how people get around and whether the thaw in relations with the United States will make any difference to their lives. Audio
bill-praying

 

[Captain Doom and Gloom] Want to see why eBay is BS! They got greedy and their fees are killing them. The best way to sell your stuff is locally or a yard sale. A personal web store or web page can sell too using a safe payment tool software. Donating is no good anymore thanks to the IRS rules. eBay Fee Calculator

The lady next door keeps me awake all night 3 or 4 times per week, eating candy bars. All night long it’s, “Oh Henry, oh Henry, oh Henry!”
Three-Barrel-Shotgun
[Stay Home When Injustice is Committed] People who don’t go out in riotously confrontational demonstrations don’t get shot. If you are there you run the risk. Too many people with nothing to do. Get a job contribute to America don’t just look to take.
sex-pill
Submit anything of a positive nature, unless it’s breakthrough stuff to island@bigpinekey.com

national politics an(Click here)