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2016 January

Wednesday, January 6, 2015

The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-Coconuts

Since 2002. Published Wednesdays and Saturdays

national politics an(Click here)
snowbird-dollars[Snowbirds] My husband and I are snowbirds. I can understand your frustration. We live in a beach town on the Delmarva coast. We get 3 months of chaos and insanity. However, without these summer tourists, we wouldn’t be able to enjoy our life the rest of the year. These tourists bring in enough money during the summer to support enough business so many can stay open year round. We learn to deal with it. We can’t leave our community on Saturdays due to the influx of cars. We have to plan our grocery shopping around the busiest days, etc. These summer tourists which cause us so much pain result in our ability to live in our paradise the rest of the year. We like to escape the coldest part of the winter and all the snow so we head south. As a result of what we go through during the summer, we are courteous and try not to create problems and spend our money in your community.
[Backyard Gun Range] Legislation that severely restricts backyard gun ranges is quickly moving through the state Legislature and could be one of the first bills passed when the legislators convene next week.
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The real reason Deer Ed stopped the political section. And I for one support his decision.

[“Foot bridge”] it’s actually sitting on Cudjoe and scheduled for installation on the night of the 5th (before the CT is next published).  This is the third time they’ve scheduled it – hopefully the third time is a charm!  I’m looking forward to a safe bike/walking path from Cudjoe to Summerland.  The roads are crazy now. Some idiot passed me on Spanish Main going at least 40 and not from Venture Out (I have a picture of their license plate. White Sonatas should be more careful.)
eyes bloodshot[Seeing] Got cataracts? Got some trepidation about having a sharp knife in your eye while you watch? Check out NAC eye drops that can dissolve cataracts and remove other cloudiness. They are also reported to resolve glaucoma. No, your insurance won’t cover them and your eye surgeon does not even want you to know they exist. European countries with true universal health care have used them for years. Want to know more? Just do an internet search on NAC eye drops and you will wonder why you did not know before. I found several sources. If you decide to use the Puretango site for Ocuphase, a discount code is OCU2. I found a better price at link. I haven’t checked at Marnie’s health store on BPK yet; maybe you don’t need to wait?

Got rotten night vision? Do that search again but this time put in C3G or Cyanidin 3 Glucoside if you need a challenge. Absolutely astonishing resolution of the problem was found in testing. Swanson vitamins has the caps for about $20 a bottle. Search for a Swanson coupon code and get the latest discount. Over $50 ships free, too. Your night vision problem may also be due to a deficiency in vitamin A, taurine, zinc, copper or iron. Don’t overdo these. The USAF made sure their pilots had sufficient vitamin many decades ago for fast light intensity adjustment of the iris.

Okay, maybe now you can see me walking along at night. Which reminds me, don’t the cops know their full strength flashing lights are blinding at night? No surprise to me that one gets hit every so often. You will notice that the bright white strobe on radio towers changes to a low power red at night. That is federal law.

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Is there any place to get a list of plumbers and contractors online or in the local governments files for the sewer hook-up? I called several in the yellow pages but none return calls. Also why doesn’t the FKAA offer this hook-up service. You would think they would do it right and most reasonable since they will be making the profits from it! Business Directory > Plumbers
winter-triangle[Winter Triangle] Take a look outside tonight, tomorrow night, or the next or, well, you get the idea, and you can see one of the easiest-to-find asterisms out there — the Winter Triangle. An asterism is a recognizable group of stars made up from stars within a constellation or from various constellations (e.g. the Big Dipper is an asterism found in the constellation Ursa Major, the great bear).

Start out with finding Orion, the hunter; the easiest part of Orion to find are the three stars on his belt. Take a look at the pictures to see where he will be in your part of the world. There are four stars around the belt that make a rectangle. If you picture Orion as a man, holding his club aloft (he will be upside-down in the southern hemisphere) a star named Betelgeuse would be right in his armpit: that is the first star of the Winter Triangle. The second is pretty easy to find because Orion’s Belt points right to it: Sirius, aka the Dog Star, the brightest star in the constellation of Canis Major, the big dog, and the second brightest star in our entire sky (after the Sun). The last star in the Winter Triangle is also very bright; its name is Procyon and it is in the constellation of Canis Minor, the little dog. Take a look at the pictures attached to see where it will be in relation to Sirius and Betelgeuse in your part of the world.

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The “Submarine Pits” on Boca Chica Key. Link

[Arabs Execute Iman] With the oil producing countries gnashing their teeth over the plunging prices for crude, a decision was reached. We’ll fake a conflict by executing some wanabee important religious person and then the sword rattling will begin and the bankers will get nervous and the stock brokers will start cranking up the paranoia and then we’ll be in fat city again. Prices sky rocketing, $70 a barrel all over again. And now that Putin has labeled the USA as the number one threat to their security, the US military-industrial complex is rubbing its hands for the envisioned future Nuevo Cold War. Could history be repeating itself?  It’s wag the dog all over again.
cristal ball fortune teller[“Murrays Market”] In response to the person praising “MU AYS”, you don’t need to defend them. Your opinions of my post are so off base it’s absurd. You assumed I moved to the Keys for seafood – No. You assured yourself I believe seafood served in restaurants is not local – I never said that either. Your crystal ball needs polishing my dear. And if you think buying a pound of filet mignon deserves applause and helps the owners put their kids through college, you might want to follow the yellow brick road to Oz.
We have been talking about an access road on the north side of US1 on Big Pine for years. Plans are, “We’re going to go this way” or “that way” or maybe alongside this way? But we went “no way”. And not likely to go any way. So we’re going to tick-off (this is family friendly) a lot of people by getting easements, directing traffic by their homes, taking rights-of-way of business on US1 and digging up bicycle paths, and who knows what else. Good luck with that!

Now I’m thinking. Where is the most traffic congestion west of the light on US1? The post office. If the post office would relocate to the Winn Dixie Plaza, or a new building in that area, it would solve some of the traffic problem. It would have a better chance than the access road puzzle. Besides, the current post office is way to small anyway, and the building should probably be condemned. Just a thought. Now get to work! Happy new year.

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You can be the most beautiful person in the world and everybody sees light and rainbows when they look at you, but if you yourself don’t know it, all of that doesn’t even matter. Every second that you spend on doubting your worth, every moment that you use to criticize yourself; is a second of your life wasted, is a moment of your life thrown away. It’s not like you have forever, so don’t waste any of your seconds, don’t throw even one of your moments away.

Without you, there is no “NUT” Thank you for another year of “Rock’in you Right at the Light” in downtown Big Pine Key, Coconuts Bar & Package Store

[“Vinyl siding”] If Claude is not on BPK.com’s Business Directory shame on him. J\It’s just dumb for a self-employed businessman to omit a free listing. Lower Keys Vinyl & Aluminum. 305-395-0668. He did a screened porch for me 1 1/2 years ago & I am very happy with the work and price. Business Directory >  Home Improvement
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Keep looking, you’ll get it.

[“Murrays Market”] The only reason Murrays does so well is because Summerland Key is too far from a major market for the residents to travel to and fro unless they are doing their week’s shopping. I haven’t been there in a long while, did they ever remove those railroad ties from the left side of their parking lot?
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A Florida Keys manikin.

[“Dating sites”] Mingle2.com also appears to be 100% free and also does not appear to share your email with spammers. Avoid Connecting Singles, and Date Hookup (which used to be free and okay, but now redirects to Ourtime).

To those that are attached, don’t dump your honey just because you got your pride hurt, because it’s not as easy to replace them with good quality as you may think. However, if he or she has beaten the crap out of you or is otherwise physically or emotionally abusive, then get the hell out of there. You are way better off alone, and there are good people out there who would love to connect. May your 2016 be a joyful adventure!

boat motor owl cat[Boating Skills and Seamanship Class] The Coast Guard Auxiliary Flotilla 13-3, Big Pine Key, is offering a Boating Skills and Seamanship class beginning January 19th thru February 4th, 2016.  It is a three week program, two (2) nights per week from 7:00 to 9:30 P.M. It will be held at Venture Out – Ships Store Second Floor   701 Spanish Main Drive Cudjoe Key Florida. The cost of the program is $55 per person (materials included) and $80 per couple with shared materials. Topics include: Which Boat is for You, Required Boat Equipment, Operator Responsibilities, Rules of the Road, Handling Your Boat, Highway Signs, Orientation to Nautical Charts, Weather, A Look at the Coast Guard Auxiliary, Navigational Tools & Techniques, Navigation Exercise, Trailering, Boating Safety, Your Boat’s Radio, a Search and Rescue (SAR) Exercise, Florida Law, Hands on Knot Tying and a guest speaker from the Florida Keys National Marine Sanctuary. For more information, visit our web site and select “Boating Safety Classes” Link
Monarch Butterfly recovery plan. Link
thank you note[Thank You] Recently I sent an acquaintance down here a large gift card and was planning to also send this individual a one hundred dollar bill.  I thought if this person writes me a thank you note then I would mail the $100.  No thank you note or acknowledgment of my kindness and generosity.   The world today is really sad.  And I have an extra $100.  The moral of the story is to show your gratification with a proper thank you note, in the snail mail or at the least in an email or, for crying out loud, in a text message!
[Jersey Girls] I was biking in BP on a wide, paved path and came upon a jersey girl from behind. Of course, she had noise piped to her ear and had no idea I was approaching. When I got within 50 feet of her, I realized the path was not wide enough for both of us.
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I saw a bunch of bikers leaving Tom Thumb and had to laugh at their looks. They were all old and fat, it was amazing. It seems the Harley riders have a mental image of Marlon Brando in The Wild One from their youths, but they don’t realize that they are not young, fit or tough, but old, fat and soft and somewhat of a joke. Those old fattys just don’t get it.

[“Murrays Market”] “MU AYS” market would be out of business if it were located anywhere else than the Keys. In fact, you can find markets of this caliber in any crime-ridden, low-income US city. Market owners such as this do not care about what their market looks like or what decaying product they sell to their loyal customers. As long as they keep filling their pockets with your money – no changes will be made. It wouldn’t surprise me if there was a back room with a sliding window for their “other” customers. ~fddarling@snet.net
shack-on-stilts[High Water] Since the oceans are rising and that will make most islands uninhabitable, why not build them up with all our billions of tons of trash in our mainland landfills. Just ship the stuff to the Bahamas and Caribbean and build retaining walls around these islands. Just think of St Kitts being 100 feet higher and protected from flooding. It would help save their tourist industry. We could move Gitmo to one too. Forget the Florida Keys, we want it to turn into the New Venus, and it will small[?] just like Venus when the sewers all back up. Great idea!
People who start a comment with ‘I may not be the sharpest…‘ usually immediately provide ample evidence with the subsequent words.
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Did anyone see how many boat trailers were parked at the old Quay boat ramp and the overflow of boat trailers at the FHP parking lot in Marathon this weekend?

[Tourist Drivers] Maybe it would help traffic if the county put up a billboard in the upper Keys that said something to the effect: ‘we love our tourists, but please pull over to enjoy the vistas – don’t block traffic’

I think we need more of the ‘stick’ too. I would love to see the police pulling over speeders as well as the creepers (the folks that drive well below the speed of traffic, cause back-ups, and create the frustration that leads to the stupid human driver activities of trying to pass in dangerous manners).  I think those slow-pokes carry some liability for the accidents created when they refuse to yield and block traffic. I followed someone last week for 15 miles and they never got within 10 mph of the speed limit. The line was horrendous and when we passed them we saw they had the camera out and were oblivious to the rest of us.

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Traffic is really bad. The TDC has over-achieved!  Seems it keeps getting worse and worse as we get more and more popular. The Ragnar Race people should come down and see what we were talking about. Many thanks to the County Commissioners for removing that traffic nightmare for this year.
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[National Politics] I’m glad the politics has moved to its own page [National Politics]. It only enabled those of opposing views to call each other names, “liar” mostly. No opinions were ever changed.

[“Shopping online”] There’s a great reason to shop at a store. Lucky for them. Those are called workers that earn their pays the way America was built–one brick at a time, catching one fish at a time, netting one lobster at a time and taking care of one person’s landscaping at a time. I’m sure they will be happy they don’t have endure your arrogance. That’s a win-win.
an_for-rent2House For Rent. 3/2 on 30th Street Ocean for rent $2,900 Marathon, F/L/S. $8700 to move in. 305-393-9345 or claude.halioua@gmail.com Available immediately Located on open water, dock included concrete block house, 2 car covered garage, laundry, big landscaped lot 110×110. Pool coming, Pets OK. See photos on Marathon area monthly rentals on FB
If we’re ever in a situation where I’m the voice of reason, then we are in a very, very bad situation.
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[Snowbird Driving] It’s bad enough that they always try to pass, but it’s worse when they stop in the middle of the road to photograph the Key deer.

[Sanctuary Seminar Sheds Light on Lighthouse, Lobsters, and Undersea Lab] Become enlightened about Loggerhead Key Lighthouse and explore an undersea lab in this winter’s “Sanctuary Seminar” series, which also features talks on lobsters, canal restoration efforts and the status of Florida Bay. In honor of the National Park Service’s 100th anniversary in 2016, Dry Tortugas National Park experts will share plans to relight historic Loggerhead Key Lighthouse and stabilize Civil-War era Fort Jefferson. Link
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[Nira Tocco] Someone was looking for a good realtor the other day. Here’s her site.  Link. ​ Business Directory > Realtors

[Screw Up School Board] Finding out what caused a $20,000 accounting mystery at a Key West school day care will cost the Monroe County School Board between $25,000 and $30,000, according to a proposed contract with a forensic auditor.
hot cheerleader

[“Girls mature faster than guys”] That’s because men don’t usually develop breast until their mid-40’s

[Snowbirds]I was at the W/D today around 2 pm and encountered a particularly nasty bunch of snowbirds. They looked like zombies from the Walking Dead. About ten of them were fighting over a steak at the meat counter. I kept looking for a camera crew but to no avail. I hope this doesn’t give me nightmares.
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Does Kim Kardashian and her clan buy their publicity? Like who the hell cares what these bimbos do?

NOAA’s Florida Keys National Marine Sanctuary named two new appointees, modified two appointments, and renewed terms of seven existing council members during the December sanctuary advisory council meeting. The new advisory council alternates appointed at this month’s meeting are Kasey Fey, Education & Outreach (Alternate) Lisa Mongelia, Tourism Upper Keys (Alternate)

Within the Fishing – Commercial – Shell/Scale category, Justin Bruland’s appointment was revised to the primary seat, while Jeff Cramer became the alternate. The following members were reappointed to the same seat for another term: Chris Bergh, Conservation and Environment [2 of 2] (Primary), Martin Moe, Education and Outreach (Primary), George Neugent, Elected County Official (Primary), Heather Carruthers, Elected County Official (Alternate), Corey Malcom, Submerged Cultural Resources (Primary), Diane Silvia, Submerged Cultural Resources (Alternate), Andy Newman, Tourism — Upper Keys (Primary). A full listing of council members, along with their contact information, is available on the sanctuary website. Link

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Forcing a child, who doesn’t know any better, to do something just because you believe in it is disgusting!  No child should be made to wear “crocs” in public.

[Advisory Council Chairs, Council Colleagues, and Friends] As most of you know, I have recently retired from government. This letter is to transmit to you a copy of my “farewell” email to the ONMS staff, which I thought, would be of interest because each of you is part of the Sanctuary System and family. The email pretty well sums things up with me and gives some thoughts to the staff for the future. But most importantly I want to pass on to you some final thoughts on the value and conduct of National Marine Sanctuary Advisory Councils.

As some of you know, there are new Council members whom I do not know; Advisory Councils have been a passion for me. I think I was instrumental in creating most of the councils and certainly have worked with each council closely at one time or another. It was about 25 years ago, early during the management planning process for the new sanctuary the Congress had declared for the Florida Keys, when I came to realize the “power” and importance of citizen advisory bodies. Back then I was not running the Sanctuary Program. I was running another NOAA organization and simply got pulled into the “problem” of what to do in the Keys. In short order, however, I found myself designing and leading the management planning process and my office even took on producing the Management Plan and DEIS. The process and these documents were ‘’land mark” developments in the evolution of what a marine protected area (MPA) could be and deliver to its community. It is not a stretch to say that the process and outcomes in the Keys pushed forward MPA management everywhere in the United States and abroad. The secret behind this big success, however, was – you guessed it – the Advisory Council, they had become “direct participants” not advisors and had a major hand in crafting the plan.

Power of Advisory Councils. I honestly did not fully understand the value and power of citizen advisory councils back then – at least not initially. But after four years of working closely with these great and committed citizen volunteers, the proverbial “light bulb” went on!  Citizens expressing their desires for community and place in specific and clear terms through the management planning process we had created had changed the game. The complex and unresponsive system of Federal, State, and local governmental agencies; and the entrenched special interest groups had to respond, had to become active participants, had to find common ground. It was a lesson that I carried with me when I came to lead the Program – now ONMS – almost a decade later.

Consequently, during my tenure at ONMS I pushed Advisory Councils hard, sometimes past the comfort zone of the councils themselves, as well as elements in ONMS and certainly NOAA.  Often the issue had arisen as to who is really in charge and, therefore, who determines how far an Advisory Council goes or participates or even what issues it takes up. I have always tried to keep the answer to this question somewhat vague, because in my career I have found that a “truly” a push-pull dynamic works best. And this occurs best within the Sanctuary System when ONMS and citizen advisors have to struggle to find common ground. This back and forth is some sometimes “messy” and hard to do. But as long as everyone keeps clear the goal – what is to be achieved – and the criteria for decision, then good things occur on many levels. The Advisory Councils of National Marine Sanctuaries have proven beyond anyone’s doubt that the result is worth the effort. Sanctuary Advisory Councils have, in many circles, become the “standard” for community-based management in conservation.

The Work of Advisory Councils is Never Done. And so it is no coincidence that the “new process” in which National Marine Sanctuaries can once again be created in our country is a “Community Based Nomination Process.” Getting this approach “approved” by this Administration is a direct result of more than a decade of the Advisory Councils and their colleagues, acting in hundreds of ways everyday, showing the way by doing. Just as in the Florida Keys 25 years ago, community voices speaking in an organized manner, through the Sanctuary System, had created conditions for a new approach at the National level. Every community that nominates their place for consideration for sanctuary status or proceeds to become a National Marine Sanctuary is in debt to each and every Advisory Council existing in the System today.

But the hard work and struggle is never over for any council. Councils must be part of the “continuous process” of managing a place overtime. The rapidly changing world around us demands continuous forward thinking and adaptation. And if the communities affected do not drive this, than who will or should drive it?  It is with this in mind that I offer some specific thoughts below. Note that the order does not imply order of importance, rather just how they popped into my mind. Some thoughts:

  1. Avoid the temptation to make things “easier” by creating too many processes; protocols, and decision trees to govern these relationships, because they will inevitability minimize the “magic” of community activism!
  2. Never rush the community based process. Such processes must take the time they need and each community and its pace is different. Trust can only be built overtime and in the rhythm of place.
  3. Be sure to always take a long view of what is to be done. Not all problems or decisions are equally urgent or important to “solve” now. And in many cases the scale and scope of a problem, or its solution, is not adequately understood in the present. Recognize that taking the long view is the key to empowering in a “continuous management process.”
  4. Ensure that every Advisory Council is part of a ‘conveyor belt’ nurturing new and future members of the Council. It is generally agreed that community groups can be created and be active participants on a given issue, but it is not agreed that community groups, such as Sanctuary Advisory Councils, can be sustained in the long run, as interest inevitably wax and wane and communities change. As part of a community, National Marine Sanctuary Advisory Councils have proven that they can stand the test of time.
  5. Recognize the difference between what it means to be only “advisory” versus an “active participant.” Be that active participant in supporting site and program priorities.
  6. Keep clear in your communities the phrase: “Governmental programs come and go, Sanctuary programs come, stay, and become part of a community.”
  7. Expand as necessary and vital to the “quality of life” and “sustainability” of a community or place the scope of issues or concerns that the Advisory Council addresses.
  8. Find ways to share experiences and lessons among Advisory Councils. This is easier said then done. Council members are volunteers and have limited time and resources to add this task to their workday. Give special thought to how this can be accomplished.
  9. Use the annual meeting of Advisory Council Chairs to build a system wide common agenda to mobilize Advisory Councils and their communities to “common purpose(s)!” Purposes that are not only relevant to Sanctuaries, but like minded communities around the county. Build larger coalitions of common purpose.
  10. And lastly, something I could never quite get off the ground is an ONMS training program for Advisory Council members. Advocate for developing a continuing education program for Advisory Council members. As you know, Council members come from all walks of life with a wide range of experience and expertise. Nevertheless, there is often a steep learning curve on councils not only with respect to how Councils and marine sanctuaries conduct business, but also with respect to much of the subject manner. Making Advisory Councils more knowleable and effective is better for all Sanctuaries and similar communities across the country.

There is a lot more might say, but ten points seems a good number at which to stop. Note that I sent this letter to Advisory Council Chairs and asked them to distribute to the members of their individual councils. Keep faith in what you do. Still passionate about Sanctuary Advisory Councils!  ~Dan Basta

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[La Bomba!] It’s always hot in Mexico! Video

Under Obama we’ve enjoyed, probable, the longest bull market in recent history.
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[Oceans of Acid] As the oceans absorb man made carbon emissions a chemical reaction takes place which is making sea water more acidic.  Audio

[Broiling] Why should I open the oven door while broiling? I got a new electric stove and they said that.
If your resolution this year is to quit drinking, please do not pour anything down the drain. Just call me and I’ll come and pick it up for free and dispose of it in a natural way. I will also take any tobacco, drugs and mistresses if you are giving up those too.
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[“Sheriff Office”] What happened to the person who was to tell all to the people of Monroe County? I’ve been waiting with baited breath. Did they get to him?

[Snowbird Driving] Please everyone locals and visitors, be careful on US 1. The last few weeks have been the perfect storm of too many cars and drivers that too often are impatient/inattentive/inconsiderate (put me in the impatient group). Let’s all slow down and focus on the road. It will benefit everyone.
Natalie ColeNatalie Cole has passed away. She is held dearly by The Reach Band’s singer who was with Natalie once on the stage of The Las Vegas Hilton. The most honest, straightforward and truest words were expressed by Natalie to the upstart on that evening, “Unforgettable“. For sure. The best album she did was the one with her father, Nat King Cole, years after his death.
[Captain Doom and Gloom] Is it me or are doctors caring less about what they scribble on their prescription pads? Lately it seems they don’t bother to ask what meds I am on, they just conveyor-belt me through their exam room, write a semi-literate something on the prescription pad, and, “Yell next!”. I have developed a personal self-defense system to check everything they do using my computer online. I have found interactions of meds that would cause me problems and have mentioned these to my medicine men only to be assured that there is no problem. Maybe it is because I am in the Keys where the local feather-wearing-tambourine-bangers still “practice” medicine; or are all the “doctors du quackery” doing the same worldwide? Scary thought, eh? You have to take care of yourself!

DEF: Local n, A toothless subliminal that never blinks or bathes.
DEF: Ceiling fan n, A sex toy in the Keys on hot days.
DEF: Deodorant n, A non-effective redneck coating.
DEF: Smoking n, A habit to reduce life spans of morons
DEF: Manners n, The art of dignity lost to most humanity.
DEF: Redneck n, A degraded sub-human created by herniated sperm.
DEF: Fungus n, That dark mass under my foot who interrupted my conversation at the bar.

breakfast morning dogRemember about 100 years ago when you were a kid and you woke up to Mom cooking breakfast of cereal (carbs and sugar), OJ (sugar), milk (carbs and protein) and maybe a peanut butter and jelly sandwich (sugar) if you were good? Lunch was that PBS (peanut butter sandwich) with grape juice (sugar) and maybe more milk. You ran around playing like a mad man, and never ran out of energy. Then dinner came and you ate your veggies and meat and potatoes, and fell asleep soon after. Today it is just the opposite where you get chemical everything that has made your brain stale, your energy level almost non-existent and your drive to succeed nil. Analyze this then wake up. Have we been had? All we seem to do today is breed by accident wanting or not. Maybe we should stop consuming man made foods and go back to the old days where we had fun and played all day.

Submit anything but National Politics to island@bigpinekey.com For National Politics go directly to that page, log in, and post your comment. NATIONAL POLITICS

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