Tuesday, June 18, 2013

The Coconut Telegraph

Anonyomous letters to the editor with pictures

The Original Unsocial Media – Daily Since 2002

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moorings18[Cruise People] Try “The Moorings”, they are based in Clearwater, Fl. They have boats all around the world for rent. Try the British Virgin Islands from Tortola. They have power and sail catamarans along with monohull sail boats from $300 to $1200 per day with a captain and cook available. We have done it about 6 times with 36’, 39’ and 47’ power cats. The greatest vacations we ever had. You will love it. Link

Fanci Seafood will be closed on Sundays until August. Everyone have a great summer!

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[Spam] The newest spam gimmick to get you to open their email is to ask you to please rate their product, service or company. Getting us engaged is their priority.

an_welcome_tropical_shoresSeeking a private yacht with a Captain who knows the best dive sites for three to five full days in the Dry Tortugas.  

No crew wanted.  We are self sufficient, are able to prepare our own meals and all things involved with this kind of adventure.  The two divers will pay all gas, food and drank for all, plus a healthy fee for the boat owner/captain.  

We are not going down to rape the ocean, or be gouged at twenty four hundred dollars a day, nor do we wish to be harassed or policed by someone telling us what to do (except for safety reasons).  We know how to dive well, have loads of common sense, will bring our own gear and have no intentions of getting bent [the bends]  way out there.  

We’re not looking for a charter business which caters to shark finners or a cheap cattle boat run by a helicopter crew who requires to see your dive computer after every dive. And then they want a tip after bossing you around during your staycation!  Wow.  

We just want to swim with the fishies in a pristine area, and the only place left in our sunshine state is around the Dry Tortugas. Most other venues have been rode hard and put up wet.  Good thing it is seventy miles away and the local yokels do not venture out to the real paradise.

How not to load boxes of antique crystal. This guy may be the worst airline worker of all time.Video

blondie

 

BlondieOne Way Or Another

[Another way to back up a trailer]  Put a hitch ball on your front bumper and use it for backing up a trailer.

Bluewater-Ad

I used to believe that owning your own home was an asset, however I have come to realization that it is one large liability.  Property taxes get you first, then they keep piling on more and more costs for minimal insurance. Then the County has to come along, hit you over and over again for additional expenses.

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skunk-ape17

 

[Skunk Ape] A Florida man has come forward with video on YouTube claiming he has spotted the rare and elusive Skunk Ape on camera. The Skunk Ape is also known as the Stink Ape, the Myakka Ape, and the Myakka Skunk Ape. It is rumored to live in the Florida Everglades, as well as North Carolina and Arkansas, although reports from Florida are more common. Video 

[Semicolon:] Unlike many of the other punctuation marks, there is no occasion on which the semicolon cannot be replaced by another form of punctuation or sentence construction.

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[Legalize it] Throughout the nation, cannabis policy is taking different shapes and forms. More states are removing criminal penalties for cannabis, nineteen states have protection for medical patients using cannabis, many states have created safe, legal distribution systems for cannabis and now two states allow adults over 21 to possess and use cannabis recreationally. Meanwhile, the Federal Government continues to classify cannabis as having no medical value – leaving it a schedule one drug.

In Washington, DC groups are converging on the Capitol complex calling for an end to the War on Drugs, an end to the Federal intervention into cannabis laws, an end to prohibition as we know it.

balance18

 

 

[Balance] Irrefutable proof that a good woman can bring balance and stability to your life.

[Press 1] Many of the jobs providing service to the city do not require the ability to speak English.  Yet, many of those hard working city employees have a strong desire to, at least, speak conversational English.

English To Survive is a phonetic presentation of a variety of life situations. We ask that you distribute this announcement to all departments employing non-English speaking workers, beginning with sanitation. The 45 page manual consists of sentences, words and phrases in a format of three columns: Spanish, Phonetic pronunciation of the English, and English. For example:

Problemas médicos o peligro — Medi quel Pra blemz or Den cher — Medical Problems or Danger

¡Ayúdeme, por favor! — Pliz jelp mi! — Please help me!

an_snorkel_boyLower Keys Underwater Music Festival to make waves July 13. The marine life that inhabits the Florida Keys’ living coral reef is widely acclaimed for its color and variety, but it usually doesn’t include costumed mermaids or musicians strumming their instruments. Except, that is, during the annual Lower Keys Underwater Music Festival.

The 2013 underwater action is scheduled for 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. Saturday, July 13, at Looe Key Reef. Bulletin Board

[FKAA] If we could get all the wannabe engineers who really don’t know a damn thing about sewer systems or pumps to stop misinforming us about this pump or that pump or “what if my two neighbors turn theirs off” give it a rest FKAA is in charge. You may not like them or you may not agree with them, but they are not stupid. FKAA has been bringing down a clean, continuous supply of fresh water some 125 miles for a whole lot of years without any major problems. Do you have any idea just how much effort and skill that takes. What have you done lately?

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hello17

 

 

Hello!

Convictions are more dangerous enemies of truth than lies. ~Nietzsche

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[“New Cars Look Alike”] The Corporate Average Fuel Economy (CAFE) standards promulgated by Washington require auto makers to meet an average fuel economy measure for all their vehicles.  To meet the requirements, every manufacturer is making their cars as aerodynamic as possible to increase their fuel economy numbers.  Bottom line is that wind tunnel results determine what cars look like, not style.  Since the wind tunnel outcomes are the same for every manufacturer, all the cars end up looking the same.

KO

 

[Bimbos] Kim Kardashian and the Octomom, are they sisters?

[More Bimbo News] Miss Utah flub steals spotlight from Miss USA winner Erin Brady. The Ministry Of Gossip gives it a 10 for scrambling, a 10 for rambling, and bonus points for using the phrase “create education better.” And add 10 to that for pulling it all off in an evening gown, with a huge smile and big hair. It all adds up to third runner-up. Link

nira tocco realtor 9.12

How to avoid the sewer. Link

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cake17

 

 

MacArthur Park is 45 years old! It was performed this past weekend in MacArthur Park, L.A. by it’s composer, Jimmy Webb. MacArthur Park

[Phishing] New Complaint : 2537459. Dun & Bradstreet has received the above-referenced complaint from one of your customers regarding their dealings with you. The details of the consumer’s concern are included on the reverse. Please review this matter and advise us of your position. In the interest of time and good customer relations, please provide the DnB with written verification of your position in this matter by June 28, 2013 
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“A Man Called Horse” classic movie. Full length movie.

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On this day in 1972, the Eagles released their eponymous debut, ultimately bearing 3 memorable singles: Take It Easy, Witchy Woman and, of course, Peaceful Easy Feeling. History of The Eagles Trailer 

[Developers] We are almost done hearing about Balfour Beatty and the property tax issue, and yes, there still are one or two holdouts that still want to beat that dead horse, but with any luck they too will give it a rest real soon.

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What would you do if 200 illegals mobbed your house? Link
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homer-ct[Captain Doom and Gloom]  “new cars look alike” It is not just you, the new cars are all designed by some dandy who like bent over things with big rumps and useless wheels and sissy like lines. Think Jeep or dump truck!

“Montreal’s interim mayor, a self-styled corruption fighter, faces fraud charges” We are not alone.

‘Kim K. I do not care what others think about this person, but it seems to me she and her whole family are in need of a good shrink who specializes in narcissistic personality problems.

religion politics zone

[Government Spying] On June 17, 1885 the Statue of Liberty arrived in New York City; and now it’s time to take it down!

Obama hires lawyer to reopen Office of Closure which was closed shortly after it opened. Link

[Obama’s African Trip] I guess none of the Republican presidents ever had the same backup plan for security and safety of their presidents. How much were all of  W’s trips to the sandbox (Iraq), and his African trip where we got to see him dance? Priceless.

Both parties are responsible for the damn mess we are in. They don’t need our help.

AbeObama
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[Protests] Tens of thousands of demonstrators marched through the streets of Brazil’s biggest cities on Monday in a growing protest that is tapping into widespread anger at poor public services, police violence and government corruption.

(Socialism only works until you run out of other peoples money.) Link

FROM THE RIGHT

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arizona-voters18A sad day yesterday when we learned that the Supreme Court had struck down Arizona’s voter registration law.  That law simply required that persons registering to vote in federal elections show proof of citizenship.  The thinking of the Court was not that such requirement was violative of the potential voter’s rights. The ruling simply said that the Arizona law was trumped by a federal law, the 1993 National Voter Registration Act.

But the issue may not be dead.  While issuing its ruling, the court made clear that Arizona could still have other ways to assert its argument that it should be allowed to ask for proof of citizenship. That would be the subject of separate litigation, it wrote.

It’s amazing but the 1993 National Voter Registration Act only  requires prospective voters to provide one of several possible forms of identification, such as a driver’s license or a passport, but no proof of citizenship is needed. Would-be voters simply sign a statement saying they are citizens. By the way, that law is also known as the “Motor Voter” act, and was signed by  Bill Clinton. This voter registration movement was spearheaded by the husband and wife team of Frances Fox Piven and Richard Cloward in the early 1980s. Damn few Republicans voted for the legislation.

Today  Democrats are giddily dancing around their May Pole knowing that they will still have the ability to bring in busloads of folks who are not American citizens to vote.

It would be a very, very good thing if the 1993 National Voter Registration Act was repealed or amended so as to make it a crime for a person to vote who is not an American citizen.

Then there is the fact that even though Justice Scalia voted with the majority, he said Arizona could still ask the commission to include a citizenship provision on the federal form in the future and could challenge the current form in separate litigation.

“That alternative means of enforcing its constitutional power to determine voting qualifications remains open to Arizona here,” he wrote.

The two dissenters, Justices Clarence Thomas and Samuel Alito, said in their separate opinions that states alone have the authority to decide voter qualifications. There still is hope that reason will triumph over crass Democrat politics. Thanks to Reuters.

Shelbourne’s-Princess-Grace-Michelle-Obama

Part 2) It is just so special that First Lady Michelle Obama is staying Monday evening in the $3,300-per-night Princess Grace suite of Dublin’s Five-Star Shelbourne Hotel, according to Irish press reports, adding some credence to accusations she is in the city for a quick vacation at taxpayer expense. The White House is billing Michelle’s trip to Dublin as having diplomatic significance, but her itinerary suggests otherwise. She and her daughters will visit the Trinity College library to explore President Obama’s Irish family roots, attend a performance by the world-famous Riverdance troupe, and visit the Wicklow Mountains national forest. Air Force Two has been flown to Europe along with Air Force One and is being used to transport Michelle around. It’s great to be the Queen!  Thanks again Mel Brooks. Link