Letters to the editor with pictures since 2002. Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage days, Tuesdays and Fridays.

[Hate Department] Yesterday I met a friend at Home Depot in Key West who asked us if we had seen the flamingos that have apparently taken up residence in the Torch Keys.  We hadn’t, so he told us where he had seen them off of Middle Torch Road.  So on the way back from HD we turned on to Middle Torch Road; and to make a long story short, we didn’t seen any damn flamingos but the attached pictures show what we did find.
Halfway between the large first house on the left and the first 90 degree turn, painted across the roadway is a large swastika.  Then just after the turn there are two more.  Three large swastikas painted across Middle Torch Road.  It appears they were painted somewhat crudely but the image represented on all three is clear.  We went home and checked out Google Earth and sure enough you can see the swastikas in the satellite photos.  Just search for “Middle Torch Road, Summerland Key” and follow the road.  The interesting thing is that satellite imagery that Google Earth uses is several years old and the painted images themselves look worn like they have been there for a while.  So for several years people and residents have been driving this road and have not noticed the swastikas?  If you decide to post the attached images please, please, please do not reveal my email or name.  If there is an old cell of Nazis living back there off of Middle Torch Road, I would not want to anger them and have them come after us.  What do think about this for a conspiracy theory?
[Homeless Refuses to Wear Mask] Dear Judge Fowler: I received Ticket Number 1655 on July 19, 2020 for allegedly not wearing a mask. It provides 10 days to pay the ticket and has a court appearance date of September 16, 2020 at 10:30 a.m. I consider it unlikely that any court hearings will be held on that date and as I have no ability or interest in paying this ticket – for all the reasons stated below – I would like to use this letter as my appearance to provide the following information.

I enter a plea of Not Guilty. I am legally indigent. I request the appointment of counsel. I demand a jury trial. I also state that the underlying Key West ordinance Directive 2020-13 is unconstitutional on its face and especially regarding this ticket is unconstitutional as applied and evidences gross inequality.

I constantly wear a mask while out on the streets of Key West with a few exceptions. These exceptions are when I am smoking, eating or drinking. The sole exception in the ordinance is while seated in a restaurant eating or drinking. In light of the fact that taverns are selling alcohol to go and restaurants are selling meals largely on a take-out basis as well as beverages, together with many other businesses selling beverages that are only for take-out, it is obvious that large numbers of people must remove their masks to eat and drink while outside of their homes, especially in downtown Key West. This applies to local residents, tourists and certainly the homeless.

I had pulled down my mask to smoke when given my ticket, while it remained on my face.  There was no other person within 50 feet of me before the police officers arrived. This renders the ordinance discriminatory against smokers and is thus unconstitutional as applied. The primary reason I was targeted is because I am homeless. This ordinance is further unconstitutional as applied to homeless people and smokers with its enforcement being arbitrary and capricious.

In fact, the day I got my ticket, another homeless person was issued 4 tickets in one day for not wearing a mask. It should be easy for the police to simply hand out masks in such a situation if this ordinance was truly about the pandemic and public health rather than writing 4 tickets. This ordinance is just another pretext for law enforcement to target, harass, debase and otherwise violate the constitutional rights of the homeless.

[Murder] A 59-year-old Marathon man was arrested Saturday night after he confessed to fatally shooting another in Boot Key Harbor, according to the Sheriff’s Office. Christopher Wesley Davis was charged with murder. The name of the victim will be released pending notification of next-of-kin, according to Monroe County Sheriff’s Office spokesman Adam Linhardt. Several Sheriff’s Office deputies responded to Boot Key Harbor at the end of 30th Street at approximately 10:30 p.m. regarding a shots fired call. Deputies heard multiple shots fired once they arrived. They spotted a man — later identified as Davis — in a dinghy and asked him at gunpoint if he had any weapons. Davis stated he threw them in the water. When asked if he was doing the shooting, Davis answered that he was. Davis then stated he killed a man. He was detained, Linhardt said. The deceased man was found in a dinghy nearby.
Davis told detectives he shot the victim multiple times with a shotgun and then a .22-caliber rifle when the victim approached his sailboat in a dinghy. Davis stated he had been having ongoing issues with a group of other live-aboard residents, including the victim, recently. Davis stated he feared the group was vandalizing his boat and he was fearful they were going to set it on fire. Davis stated that when he saw the victim approaching his sailboat, he began shooting him, Linhardt said.

 

Gov. DeSantis suggests Florida’s Coronavirus death toll inflated. (If he stop’s testing they will be even less.) Link

[Correction] “Post Office”. You are confused. That is UPS (United Parcel Service) that charges for “Premium Tracking.” The USPS (US Postal Service) gives you complete step by step as to delivery status of the package.  If you enter the tracking number you are given the option to sign up for email alerts too. Just check off every box and you will automatically get updated tracking info regardless if you are the shipper or recipient.   You can even enter multiple email addresses so you can have the updates sent to both sender and recipient. This service is free.

 

 

Rock the vote! Vote Joe Walsh for President 2020.

[Florida Cases Explode, Deaths Rise] Florida has pretty much tied New York for the total number of confirmed Covid-19 cases.  Turns out, though, that our mortality rate is less than one sixth that of the Empire State.  It makes me wonder why our governor is not on the news every night lecturing the country on how to deal with the crisis.  It gives one food for thought, does it not.

 

 

 

Troops coming home WWII.

[Kitten Wanted] Does anyone have a female long-haired kitten? Our cat died last month after 14 years and I thought I could just go to the animal shelter and get a new one? No, I can’t. I tried dealing with the ASPCA but it’s like dealing with a bunch of cat ladies (Oh, I actually am). They are afraid I want to torture it or put a marsh rabbit’s head on the kitten. I really don’t know what they think, but giving away kittens is not one of their thoughts. I think they’d rather keep them all out of fear I might do something ungodly to the little critter. They want me to go online and order a kitten like I would a TV from Amazon.

1 day by sea, 7 days by horseback and 23 days on foot. That’s how fast ancients thought the Black Plague spread.

 

 

Gandhi getting down.

I’m at that difficult age … the bit between birth and death.

 

Conspiracy theories have always been around. X-rays will prove to be a hoax” ~Lord Kelvin, President of the Royal society, 1883

[Bring Out Your Dead] Florida recorded more than 6,000 coronavirus deaths Monday, with more than a third of those happening during the latest spike that began about a month ago and shows few signs of abating.

 

The magnetic spare key holder fell off my truck. Where can I buy a remote keyless entry and key for a 2018 Tundra? The dealer wants $275. There must be a cheaper way. Online will sell it for $99 but you have to take it to the dealer anyway to get it programed and the key cut, so what’s the point?

[Use It Or Lose It] People are intelligent enough to see how short life really is and after making a fortune and screwing everybody and anything for sex and their ego, they realize there is nothing left but perversion and lust until they die off! This hits most thinkers when they realize their life is BS and at 50, 60, 70, 80 there is nothing left to have fun with. Life is a awful towards the end, so party now or forever hold your pecker!
I know, this is very depressing, but most reality is. Do what you have to do to be happy passing the time.

 

 

This is art. It is hanging in a major institution in Miami, but to my imagination I think they discarded the art by mistake and collected the floor trimmings instead.

[Poor Me] Did anyone know what they wanted to be when they were little? Did you? I didn’t have functioning parents and was without any guidance so I always took whatever job I could get. Not much of a career I’ll admit, but I always knew that you have to work to get money. I’ve always envied those other kids who’s parents gave them guidance an a “leg up.”

 

 

Wait, what? Mini-season is still on? Here we come and we won’t have to spend a dime in Monroe County. We’re bringing everything with us!

According to Ovid, as in the book of Genesis, man is the last work of the Creator. The information derived from Holy Writ is here presented to us, in a disfigured form. Prometheus, who tempers the earth, and Minerva, who animates his workmanship, is God, who formed man, and ‘breathed into his nostrils the breath of life.  ~43 BC
Don’t even think about lobstering; instead …
Put a cooler of iced beer, snacks and lounge chairs in your car or truck
Find the nearest boat ramp that is still open (this may take a while)
Pick a spot a safe distance away from the ramp (this may be up to 1/2 mile) and position your chair and cooler-preferably in the shade and behind some large boulders. Binoculars are suggested for enhanced viewing.
Sit back and enjoy the friendly visitors launch their boats. Observe their courtesy and gentleness towards fellow boaters.
If gunfire should erupt keep your head down and quickly get the hell out of there.
If you are not seriously wounded sit back that evening and share your experiences with friends and family.
Repeat the next day if so desired.

 

Gone With The Wind’ star Olivia De Havilland dies aged 104. Link

Lies never go away. They ripple through time and eventually come back to bite you on the ass.