Monday, May 18, 2015

The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-Coconuts

Since 2002. Published Weekly

Submit anything of a positive nature, but no national politics or sewer stuff unless it’s breakthrough stuff to island@bigpinekey.com
(Ed: Although all advertisers’ contracts have expired I’m still going to display their ads for free until they get used to the new CT. Hopefully they will all want to keep advertising.)

sea-grapes5.13.15-00
The seagrapes are about to ripen if the birds don’t eat them first. Seagrapes taste somewhat like muscatel grapes, a dry sweetness and rather earthy-tasting.
[GMO Tomato] I bought big ripe tomatoes at the flea market 13 days ago and one is just now showing signs of rotting. A real tomato would have rotted after just a few days. These days produce is designed to have a long shelf life and the consequences are that most produce, tomatoes especially, have almost no flavor, but they look real nice.
Hummer-Limo
The inside of a Hummer Limo.
Tuesday, May 12th marked the 90th birthday of Lawrence Peter “Yogi” Berra. I don’t care what sport you follow, or who your team is, everybody loves Yogi. He’s a national treasure and according to the stats, the best catcher to ever play the game. Now, his health is not the greatest since his wife of 65 years, Carmen, passed away last year and he lives in an assisted-care facility in West Caldwell, NJ. I recommend the book “Driving Mr. Yogi” The story of how Ron Guidry looked after Yogi for many years and the great friendship between them.
tesla2[Home Battery Pack] This is (will be) a useful product. It’s just a battery pack with an inverter to convert 12V DC to 120V AC. It can be charged by plugging it into the wall like you would a car/motor battery or via a solar panel or even a small wind turbine. The technology is not so much in the way it is charged but the way the charge is stored and delivered. No home should be without one, although you could make your own with a deep cycle marine battery, an inverter and a trickle battery charger. Cleaner and quieter than a gas powered generator. Link
The fact that there’s a highway to hell and only a stairway to heaven says a lot about anticipated traffic numbers.
posionwood-berries-5.13.15-00
These poisonwood berries will attract the beautiful white crown pigeon who will soon fly to the Keys from the Bahamas just to eat these berries. The Poisonwood tree is protected for this reason.
[[Shitty news] “There will be less than 100 on-site (aerobic) systems. Design and construction of on-site systems has proven more challenging than anticipated.” Why don’t they let those remote homes keep their existing septic systems? They are only a “pinprick” compared to the massive scope of the sewer system.] “There will be less than 100 on-site (aerobic) systems. Design and construction of on-site systems has proven more challenging than anticipated.” Why don’t they let those remote homes keep their existing septic systems? They are only a “pinprick” compared to the massive scope of the sewer system.
jihad7
Don’t mess with Texas.
That tweedy bird form last week looks like a humming bird, tweet, tweet, tweet!
looney_toon_sloan[Sloan For President] I saw these two posts down below in your 19 April issue. Looks to me FTR learned what you kept sacred and I kept preaching on the CT: if people have to put their real name on what they post to the CT, FB, etc., it reduces what you hate being submitted to the CT. Wonder why it took FTR so long to figure that out? Glad he finally came out of the chicken coop, hope he’s doing okay. Don’t think he’s gonna like how things go in USA, regardless of which elephant or donkey ass gets elected next into the Oral Orifice. I saw a more recent from FTR on the CT, explaining Florida’s closed primaries keep Independents from being able to vote in partisan primaries, and FTR urged CT readers to enlist in one or the other animal rear peep holes, so they can made a difference – LOL (lots of luck, laugh out loud – you pick.) When pigs fly works about as good.A few days ago, I announced my candidacy for that exalted high end position, no political party affiliation, although this here graphic Ed made up once might do.
smile8
[“Say Jihad!”] Hey, Fatima, you’re not smiling.
Those of you looking for a Dentist I suggest Dr. Christopher Golden in Big Pine Key. He is excellent, honest and reasonably priced. I do not work for him. My husband and I were patients when we lived there. My husband had some serious issues. He did not take our insurance but our insurance still paid some of his fees as a non-provider. His prices were the same or just slightly higher than the “in-network” allowances. He is also extremely gentle. We have not been able to find a Dentist as good as him and have been ripped off by several of those “Corporate” dentists since. Give him a try.
reef shark00parrotfish00
I got this picture of a reef shark and parrotfish last week at Looe Key.
Please, please, please, no FTR!
orchid-societyThe Key West Orchid Society had their monthly meeting at West Martello Tower. Stop by to see the Martello Tower’s beautiful grounds.Pictured are Valorie, Lou, Marina, Jay & Marie the powerhouse behind the Society.
A friend asked what would I do about Amtrak, the US Government’s passenger train system? It loses money terribly. It’s run by inefficient bureaucrats who are paid exorbitant bonuses, who probably are stealing Amtrak money, and hamstrung further by the union. Its service is poor, its cars are old and not well maintained. My friend said, compare that to the Canadian version of Amtrak. A great passenger rail service, well maintained, but it costs more to ride, about par with air travel.I say, offer Amtrak to the Canadians to run as if it is their passenger train service. They call all the shots, remit a fee to the US Government. He asks, would the Canadians go for that? I say, I don’t know, but that’s the only solution I see; based on what he told me, it won’t be fixed by Amtrak or the US Government.
plants44
I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants!
Key West is among the top 10 “coolest towns in America,” according to the latest issue of Jetsetter Magazine, which ranked the island at number 8. Topping the list is Asheville, North Carolina.
ballyhoo8pinfish8The fish pictured is a ballyhoo whose bottom lip extends to form a bill. A pinfish looks more like a bream. Pinfish are named for their spines not their shape.
[Grammar] The difference between feeling your nuts and feeling you’re nuts.
To-Kill-a-MockingbirdScene from “To Kill a Mockingbird”, white south Alabama lawyer defends black man accused of raping white woman who made it all up, the white jury knew it, convicted black man, who then hung himself in jail.
[Welfare] Thank you Florida, Kentucky, and Missouri, which are the first states that will require drug testing when applying for welfare. Some people are crying and calling this unconstitutional. How is this unconstitutional? It’s OK to drug test people who work for their money, but not for those who don’t? Is that their logic? If you can afford to buy drugs then you can afford your own groceries.
spider string
It’s raining spidersLink
[Hidden Fees] I was born and raised in Key West and just in the last few years moved to the Spring Hill area of Florida. A friend of mine from up here’s daughter just got married and her and her new husband were headed for Key West on their honeymoon. They asked me if I knew a very nice place to stay and I mentioned a very nice place which I will not mention. They stayed there and had a great time but were quite shocked about their final bill. They found out that the motel had charged them for a few hidden fees, one of which was a $20 per night fee for parking in their parking lot. I mean I know that Key West is pricey because I lived there, but this should be an embarrassing robbery even by Key West standards.
diaper-drive
Diaper drive.
A well-planned life doesn’t make for a very good life because while you’re planning, life passes you by.
bacon-sushi
How to make BBQ bacon sushi. Video
Help feed the world. Support Monsanto! Link
1-Ave-E-00Big Pine Key. House on stilts. 3 bedrooms. 2 full bathrooms. Bay window in Kitchen, plus a pantry and dishwasher. Dining area/living room. Big porch. Large storage area downstairs. Covered parking for two vehicles. Central air conditioning/heat. Very bright and clean and freshly painted. Wall to wall carpeting. Laundry area in hallway.  Electric bill is about $165 a month. No smokers or dogs. $1800 a month. First, last and $1000 security ($4600 total to move in, utilities not included). 31071 Avenue E. Email: b33043@outlook.com. See more photos at http://keys.craigslist.org/apa/5030637354.html
[Second Amendment Texans] Biker gang shooting leaves nine dead, 18 Injured. Video
Classic-Vette-Coupe
Classic Corvette coupe.
[Moving Sell and Free Stuff Too] We live on No Name Key at the end on Tortuga Lane Turn on Paradise.Lane. Last house on left. We are having a moving sell and give away. Yellow house, just come and take what ever you need. The downstairs stuff is all free. The boat and pull trailer is yours if you can tow it away. Sunday or anytime during the week. Just take it. I will be in Key West.
houndfishj
[“Pinfish or ballyhoo”]
Neither, it’s a Houndfish.
[110V or 220V] After all the letters informing potential customers the need of supplying a 220V service to run the turd grinders it seems that the residents of No Name Key can run the 110V grinder pumps with their existing service. What is going on? If 110V grinder pumps are available why is the County Commission forcing select residents to incur extra expense? Who cut a deal for those 220V pumps?The news that the FKAA is planning to include No Name, Middle & Big Torch into this unbelievably contentious sewer system is somewhat puzzling. Where is the endless supply of water needed to operate this system coming from? The water main to supply Middle and Big Torch Keys doesn’t exist, 7.2 miles of no water main. And what about No Name? Where’s the water coming from? In the most environmentally sensitive place in Florida how smart was it to install an experimental system that, now it seems, no environmental protection agency is required to have oversite on and doesn’t seem to have to follow any safety or engineering requirements or standards? What will happen to this tourist driven economy when, not if, the “We Trust our Engineers” system fails. And what about the 1900 homeowners whose homes could be condemned because they have no ability to flush the toilet. What a shitty situation–pun intended
cupcake18
Another thing I don’t understand is ‘Cupcake Wars‘. Why do they have to make a thousand cupcakes? Can’t they just decorate one or two for the judges to taste? What’s the point?
For sale. 1993 Chevy Conversion Van with tow package. New tires, radiator, and brakes. High mileage but runs good. $500 takes it. The picture I have won’t upload, so just email me and I’ll send it to you. $500 takes it. Please email me at washcondo@yahoo.com
mechanic change wheel tire[Failed Reef] State environmental officials are undertaking a massive two-year project to remove 90,000 tires from the bottom of the ocean floor in Fort Lauderdale. The failed 1970s tire reef project off Hugh Taylor Birch State Park was an attempt dispose of tires in an environmentally friendly way. An estimated 700,000 tired were dropped into the ocean in hopes of attracting fish and providing a foundation for corals to grow. The project kicked off with great fanfare in 1972 when more than 100 boats full of tires were dumped into the water while the minesweeper USS Thrush looked on. But few corals grew and, even worse, the tire bundles broke apart and drifted onto the natural reefs and kill coral. Now the lifeless vista of tires stretches across 35 acres. The Florida Department of Environmental Protection budgeted $1.6 million for the work.
Submit anything of a positive nature, but no national politics or sewer stuff unless it’s breakthrough stuff to island@bigpinekey.com