Monday, March 2, 2015

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The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-CoconutsSince 2002. Anonymous Letters to the Editor with pictures. Published Monday through Friday by Noon.

old man pick nose booze
[Never Say Die] The 2015 Community Health Improvement Plan, released earlier this month by the Monroe County Department of Health, shows that the Big Pine area’s mortality rate is well below the county average on five leading causes of death. It’s probably the amount of booze we drink.

Frank Sinatra — I’m Gonna Live Till I Die

hareens 12.2.14
Got drunk and finished my taxes. I’m getting 1.3 billion dollars back and I own Puerto Rico.
camel1[Shalom] Most know that the Hebrew word shalom is understood around the world to mean “peace.” However, “peace” is only one small part of the meaning. “Shalom” is used to both greet people and to bid them farewell, and it means much more than “peace, hello or goodbye”…. Hebrew words go beyond their spoken pronunciation. Each Hebrew word conveys feeling, intent and emotion. Shalom is more then just simply peace; it is a complete peace. It is a feeling of contentment, completeness, wholeness, well being and harmony, health, peace, welfare, safety soundness, tranquility, prosperity, perfectness, fullness, rest, the absence of agitation or discord. Shalom comes from the root verb shalom meaning to be complete, perfect and full. Shalom my friends
Dining out in the Keys is a nightmare because you might have to sit next to a clan of crude, rude, tattooed slobs that order a $25 Steak well done! And then dump hot sauce all over everything on the plate, then wash it down with cheap beer or rot gut wine. Ugh! OR…you might have to sit next to a table full of snobby, uptight suits that order a $25 steak and send it back a couple of times because it’s not JUST right, complain about where they’re seated, then wash it down with some expensive wine that even they can’t pronounce. Really?
bluewater-750w
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supper00
This was my delicious supper last night. Too bad there isn’t a restaurant that serves food like this.
Deer Ed – Sorry to hear that your “vacay” wasn’t free from digital demons. But it sure is great having you back on-line!
Nira-Tocco-6.14
[Kick Butt] Senator Tom Cotton is a graduate of Harvard and Harvard Law School. After 9/11 he joined the Army and passed on JAG Corps to join the infantry. He did combat tours in Iraq and Afghanistan, where he earned the bronze star, amongst other citations. He literally kicked the crap out of this guy in less than two minutes. I love the looks on everyone’s faces, including those behind the witness, when he asked the first question. Video
taylor2Songwriters Unite! United breaks guitars.  A musician named Dave Carroll recently had difficulty with United Airlines. Dave spent over 9 months trying to get United to pay for damages caused by baggage handlers to his custom Taylor guitar. During his final exchange with the United Customer Relations Manager, he stated that he was left with no choice other than to create a music video for YouTube exposing their lack of cooperation.The Manager responded: “Good luck with that one, pal.”So he posted a retaliatory video on YouTube. The video has since received over 6 million hits. United Airlines contacted the musician and attempted settlement in exchange for pulling the video. Naturally his response was: “Good luck with that one, pal.”

Taylor Guitars sent the musician 2 new custom guitars in appreciation for the product recognition from the video that has led to a sharp increase in orders. Here’s the Video

If today is the worst day of your life you know tomorrow will be better
accurate-home-insp-750w
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3816-front00Big Pine Key. 2 bedrooms, one bath on canal. Unfurnished ½ Duplex on clean boating canal w/seawall going to Pine Channel and coral reef. Beautiful vaulted ceilings. 1500 square feet. Tiled floors throughout. Stove, refrigerator, laundry room. Very clean. Central A/C. Ground level. Port Pine Heights subdivision. Quiet neighborhood. No smokers or dogs. $1500 a month. Available now. First $1500, last $1500 and $1000 security deposit ($4000 total to move in) Utilities not included. See more pictures at Classified Ads > For Rent
[“Eating out you might have to sit next to …”] You might just want to focus on your own meal the next time you go out to eat and quit worrying about what the people at the next table are doing. It’s a free country. Geez
fanci10-16-14
Alexander the Great instituted the custom of shaving so the enemy could not grab the beards of his soldiers during hand to hand combat.
riving-clapboard
Clapboard
in colonial New England had about a 3 inch reveal whereas Caribbean clapboard has a 4 1/2 inch reveal. I wonder why.
Bicycles. Two 26 inch, 18 speed bikes in good condition. One men’s, one women’s. $30 each or both for $50. Classified Ads > Miscellaneous
Radio-Shack10.31.14
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batista-flees
New Year’s Eve 1959
is the day Figueroa Batista fled Cuba giving the Cuban people a wonderful new year’s gift.
[Net Neutrality] Kudos to Obama and the FCC for allowing every American to have equal access to the web.
Isaksen11.5.14
If the temperature gets colder it is necessary to turn guitar strings down for them to be in tune. When it heats up you must turn the strings up. A good guitar will stay in tune for a long time if the temperature and humidity remain the same and you don’t drop it.
maori-tattoo
I don’t have any tattoos because I come from a time when it was accepted thought that only ignorant savages and sailors got them.
[Bigots Unfair] Everyone knows that Black people excel at sports and bigots praise them for that instinct. Jews excel at business and bigots ridicule them for that instinct. Why are bigots sympathetic to Blacks and not Jews?
BP-Flea-Market10.10.14
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sake2
I’m told that sake is heated to mask the poor quality of cheaper wines.
Alaska has the highest violent crime rate of any other state.
manley-deboer-1.9.15
feed cats lady
[Lost Cat] I always find it funny when the cat losers tell you the name of the lost cat as if the cat will come when you call its name. The only thing that really works with cats is an electric can opener.
Coconuts-sign-ad-750w
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lobbiestFTR is completely wrong on net neutrality. It’s a political strategy used by both parties and big business whose lobbyists and PR people convince extremists to take a twisted view of reality. When enough extremists make enough noise, people start to believe them. But don’t bother telling FTR he’s wrong, expecting him to change his mind about anything, once he takes a position. 
Pencil erasers are crappy these days. If your pencil is over a month old your eraser is probably hard as a rock and will only mar what you’re trying to erase.
Springers12.9.14
Subtitle: [Spooky ambiance]
posion3
On some airlines, pilot and co-pilot must eat different meals in case there is something wrong with the food, although it’s pretty hard to tell if something’s wrong with airplane food!
[All Aboard!] 3.5 million travelers pass through Shinjuku Station every day. It’s the world’s busiest train station.
johnsons-7.9.14
[Planned obsolescence] Our willingness to part with something before it is completely worn out is a phenomenon noticeable in no other society in history. The phenomenon is soundly based on our economy of abundance. It must be further nurtured even though it is contrary to one of the oldest inbred laws of humanity–the law of thrift.
politics-zone-750w
As far as net neutrality goes, thank God the Republicans aren’t in charge. Obama stood up to big business as having gone too far. Big business will surely challenge the FCC’s decision to treat the internet as a utility in court so they can put it to the little guy as usual.
The poster is correct in assuming that if FTR is so convoluted on what net neutrality is, what else is FTR wrong about. Republicans like Mr FTR are in favor of charging higher prices for preferred bandwidth to the highest bidders. The rest of the world wants the internet to be neutral — all sites created equal — a fair playing field. Remember Republicans will shut down government if they don’t get their way. They want secure borders and blame Obama for them being porous, but Republicans want to shut down Homeland Security because they can’t get their way on some other issue. Homeland Security is responsible for securing our borders.
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The same republicans who scream “secure the border!“, voted to shut down the very agency that secures it.
My question: How could any one of Jewish heritage vote for a Democrat, any Democrat of any reason.
from the right
In the last edition of the CT prior to our Deer Ed’s vacation, he expressed profound disagreement with my condemnation of “Net Neutrality.” Being able to express diverse opinions is the very back bone of America. Savor it, protect it.net-neutrality2My reasons for condemning “Net Neutrality” are legion. Here are just a few: Net neutrality goal is to empower the federal government to ration and apportion Internet bandwidth as it sees fit, and to thereby control the Internet’s content. The courts have previously ruled the FCC’s efforts to impose “net neutrality” as being a government overreach, so the battle isn’t over. But for now, the FCC has granted itself enormous power to micromanage the largely unrestrained Internet.The FCC claims that NN will result in “Fostering Investment and Competition”, and yet it has decided to kill any hopes of serious competition, or lowering rates, and there will be no ‘data-trail’ for anyone to check to see how we get played yet again by the providers.The FCC is a 5 member board that are political appointees.  At this time 3 of the 5 are die hard Democrats, the other two are Republican.  In keeping with the Democrat obsession with avoiding transparency prior to the imposition of new regulations or laws, as of this writing the FCC has stubbornly refused to release the exact text of the proposed rule changes. Sound familiar? Remember Pelosi’s declaration that “we have to pass the bill so that we can see what’s in the bill.” And what of Senator Obama’s profound 2007 declaration that all new rules promulgated by the FCC “must” be vetted by the public and Congress.

He even cosponsored bi partisan legislation to that end.

What little we now know is from leaks about the over 300 pages in the new regulations.

But we do know that Ajit Pai and fellow Republican FCC commissioner Mike O’Rielly, who have been consistent critics of the FCC’s new rules, said once they are published people will realize that the rules will stifle innovation and lead to taxes on the internet and increased rates for the public.

The Democrats have done it again, in secret, they have passed rules that will govern you, without any input from you.  Once again they are telling us that they must impose the rules so that we can understand them. Wise up America.

The permissionless Internet, which allows anyone to introduce a website, app or device without government review, ended last Thursday. The three Democrats among the five commissioners on the Federal Communications Commission killed it by voting to regulate the Internet under rules written for monopoly utilities.

The more than 300 pages of new regulations are secret, but FCC Chair, Democrat Tom Wheeler says they will subject the Internet to the key provisions of Title II of the Communications Act of 1934, under which the FCC oversaw Ma Bell. It is widely reported that Wheeler and the two other Democrats on the FCC were bullied by Obama apparatchiks to impose the new rules.  You may ask why. The answer is simple the new rules will ultimately permit government control of internet content.

The Supreme Court has ruled that if the FCC applies Title II to the Internet, all uses of telecommunications will have to pass the “just and reasonable” test. Bureaucrats can review the fairness of Google’s search results, Facebook’s news feeds and news sites’ links to one another and to advertisers. Bureaucrats will oversee peering, content-delivery networks and other parts of the interconnected network that enables everything from Netflix and YouTube to security drones and online surgery.

The internet was unbroken, its strength was its freewheeling competition and growth. Utility regulations are designed to maintain the status quo, and they succeed. This is why the railroads, (think AMTRACK) Ma Bell and the local water monopoly have never been known for innovation, creativity, or efficiency. The Internet is different because its technologies, business models and creativity are permissionless.

Unless Congress or the courts block Obamanet, it will be the end of the Internet as we know it.

I urge my left wing friends to contemplate a nation wherein the Tea Party controlled the content they were permitted to read or express on the web.  It could be just around the corner thanks to Obama’s FCC. Link

Part 2)  Thanks Tom…..check this out. Video 

Part 3) Let The Boy Boogie Woogie. Video