Friday, June 20, 2014

[Slideshow "number2" not found]

The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-CoconutsThe Original Unsocial Media. Anonymous Letters to the Editor with Pictures. Published Daily by Noon Since 2002. No Saturday Edition

Rotary's-4th-of-July-Celebration palm fireworks
[Fireworks] The Lower Keys Chamber of Commerce is proud to support the Big Pine & Lower Keys Rotary Club’s 4th of July celebration at the Big Pine Community Park.  The LKCC Board of Directors voted to contribute $2,500 toward the event.  Everyone is invited to attend this year’s celebration and enjoy an outstanding fireworks display.
second-nature6.1.14
[Say No To War] If it happens to turn out that our government decides to deploy American troops to Iraq again, I say that we should all let our voices be heard and let them know that all politicians and corporate heads will have to send their children. We also need to let them know that we all want the corporations to fund all corporate wars from now on. No more using tax payers money for corporate wars. Enough is enough! Two of my boys served under Iraqi Freedom and I’m not sending my youngest!
Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to this email. All emails go to the Editor and all emails get read.
cart20
[“Less pubic hair”] First it was leg hair that woman removed, than it was armpit hair, now it’s pubic hair and anal hair that is getting “Bikini Waxed” away.
Nira-Tocco-ad-750w
Breathalyzer -the written test.
generator20 Generator. 3,750 watt Coleman Powermate. Starts first pull. Good condition. Bought 4 years ago for backup in the event of a hurricane but never needed. Gas drained and oil changed annually. $95 (Sells new for $350). Call Tom  Classified Ads > Tools
[Fox News] According to statistics, the Baby Boomer Generation began retiring at 65 starting in January 2011, so for the foreseeable future the population will become more older, more conservative and more inclined to watch Fox News as older folks prefer TV over computers. Far as myself, I’m a late Baby Boomer with a young mind, I’ve already quit regular TV altogether and use Netflix, Hulu, YouTube and various online, non-politicizing, non-brain washing sources for news, free of the left or right wing media agendas. Just like many youngsters today are cutting the cable cord as well. Lets face it, who the heck wants to watch stuff they are not interested in interrupted by blaring commercials every five seconds and paying through the nose for the displeasure? With my Roku and Ad Block Plus installed in the browser, we don’t expose ourselves to unwanted stimulation. We live the easy Keys life, the way life is meant to be lived. Fox, MSNBC, CBS and all the rest can go to hell with their slant. Ditto for the guy at the bottom of the CT
Radio-Shack-750w
I have heard some Key West Conchs moved to Ocala because they got fed up with how Key West was going. Some moved there because they cashed in on the huge equity in their homes, by selling same. Some moved there because they borrowed a huge amount of money against their home equity, and then the bottom dropped out of the real estate market, and they lost their home to foreclosure or short sale. Then, unable to pay high Key West residential rents, they moved to Ocala.
Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to this email. All emails go to the Editor and all emails get read.
caffine molecules [Caffeine Dispensary] Although most people don’t think about Starbucks as being a drug company, the company’s decaf coffee contains more caffeine than McDonald’s regular coffee does. That might be good to know. I wonder what their high test coffee clocks?
I don’t judge people based on color, race, religion, sexuality, or gender. I judge people on whether or not they are jerks.
Isaksen-ad-750w
We need a Publix at Big Pine for a lot more reasons than a good Sub. Even a Piggly Wiggly would be an improvement.
lure-worm[Amazing uses for WD-40] Attract fish. When sprayed on fishing bait WD-40 covers up the scent of human hands on the bait to better lure fish, according to USA Today. The WD-40 Company receives hundreds of letters from consumers confirming this use, but prefers not to promote WD-40 as a fishing lure since the petroleum-based product could potentially pollute rivers and streams, damaging the ecosystem. Link
Everything must go. This moving sale is jam packed. Items for sale include an African djembe hand-carved full-sized drum with leather head, Fender guitar amplifier; original owner, wooden lap dulcimer, two like-new sewing machines, new computer scanner, toaster oven, hand-painted batik tapestries, wicker stand & glass-topped coffee tables, solid wood well-loved rectangular dining table, dozens of assorted leather purses, antique silver chain mail purse, watches, silver lighter, money clips, & brooches, stained glass & shell mosaic paver tiles, stacks of plain round pavers, art work off the walls, museum quality silk embroidered dowry tapestry, collection of rosebud Lenox and other vases, bookshelf, cookware, dishes, Betty Boop animated wall clock in box, full doll house, tools, including an electric drill, broad range of new, never used LPs of 80’s pop music bought on the Russian black market in 1989, other Soviet tchachkis, Costa Rican recycled fiber letter sets/blank books, cookbooks, wooden ship model collection, chairs, bar stools, beanie babies, new collectible mink teddy bear, jewelry displays, vintage jewelry, Bakelite buckles and findings, art easels, free standing hand carved cabinet(s), wicker stand, collection of Enesco bear sculptures, bell collection, dressers, kids’ scooters, 7-8-year-old girl’s bicycle, new electric scooter with charger and box, kids’ wagons, electric Crock Pot, hammock chair, futon bed, several mattresses (doubles and twins) and more. (Ed: Sale to be held at a secret time and location, I guess?)
fanci-5-18-14
yard-sale-banner Friday and Saturday, June 20th and 21st, 8 am – 1 pm, 29680 Flying Cloud Ave (off Ship’s Way), Big Pine Key. 2 gas grills, fish cleaning table, drying rack for scuba gear, fish tank, lots of boys clothes (2T – 4T) and misc craft and home items.
Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to this email. All emails go to the Editor and all emails get read.
iggy-azalea-toned-body [Stop fingering me] “I had to stop [crowd surfing]…” Australian rapper Iggy Azalea said. “I’m only doing like 2000-seaters, but I still have to have barriers even if it’s like 200 people because people try to finger me.” She also mentioned that she wears two pairs of underwear plus tights on stage now for protection, and that she’s faced assault from women especially. “Girls will try to do it more than guys ’cause girls think it’s cool, like, ’We both got vaginas, it’s fine.’ Doesn’t make it OK.” Link
[“Corruption“] The Keys have always been the most corrupt location in America and always will. You all know this. Any other town in America would have already forced Chief Jonny Lee to leave the KW Police force with 6 of his employees for killing a tourist and the City Manager for hiring his buddy without any approval whatsoever. These are just two of the latest examples of our corrupt Florida Keys Government. There are likely 20 more devious deeds going on right at this moment. It really is quite entertaining to read the constant jaw-dropping goings on.
Flea-Market-ad-750w
[“The best subs in the state of Florida are at Publix”] No way, not even close. If your every near a New Jersey Mikes (Naples side), have one of their $12 Giant Italian Subs made “Mikes Way”, feeds four! They only use their own made ingredients for everything, carefully chosen for taste. Also there are a lot of authentic (and many not so) Italian restaurants in the Keys and elsewhere in Florida that make way, way better tasting subs than Publix (I know of only one in the upper Keys). Boars Head? It’s just a fancier brand of product, but wasn’t designed as part of a overall plan to make the best tasting sandwiches like what NJ Mikes does. And Publix? they just slap any old ingredients on in various proportions and in according to customers wishes, their sandwiches are not engineered to be the absolute best tasting by seasoned chefs with the right combination of carefully controlled portions. Replace all those poor tasting Subways and Quizno’s with NJ Mikes? Publix would be considering closing their sandwich lines. After all, who wants to wait behind a five shopping carts to eat 95% salad on a tiny hoagie roll for $8? I do like Publix subs for the nutritional value and they are better than Subway, but not for their taste. Then only because there isn’t a very good alternative in most of Monroe County. But it’s going to far to say Publix has the best subs in the State of Florida, as they certainly do not if you try around quite a bit to see for yourself.
hanging-temple-22 The Hanging Temple in China is built onto the side of a cliff. Link
Why is anyone surprised that the Iraqi army is collapsing? Remember, these are basically the same guys that it took our army about two weeks to take the whole country — and that’s when they were actually well organized by comparison (living in a dictatorship will have that effect, you know). Who can forget the images of entire Iraqi units attempting to surrender to unmanned observation drones?
Manley-deBoer-750w
Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to this email. All emails go to the Editor and all emails get read.
woman20 The book Understanding Women has finally arrived in book stores.
[“600 grinder pumps”] Originally only 600 pumps called for and they were for the most remote areas. Soon after that certain County Commissioners thought of a way to divert the 1 cent sales tax for pet projects of their own. They asked for more of the cheaper pumps and less of the expensive gravity sewers so they’d have all the extra cash they wanted. That’s how we got to this awful place. We were all deceived. I agree there needs to be an investigation as to how these Commissioners abused the public’s trust.
Coconuts-sign-ad-750w
Iraqis have more interest in their tribes than in their country as a nation.
gmo tomato [Genetically Modified Foods] I’m sorry to hear people are still buying into the organic lie. The science behind the dreaded GMOs is sound. If the entire world went organic millions more would starve.  GMOs save lives. Do you know most of your organic food comes from unregulated China? Most people think organic means no pesticides. Nothing could be further from the truth. Organic foods use natural (non chemical) pesticides meaning much more needs to be used. Organic farming uses 140% more land. The price is three times more and there is no discernable difference on flavor. GMOs save lives, period! There has not been one credible study showing any danger.
[Sewers] Not only did the FKAA / DEP advertise permitting notices in the Broward Sun Sentinel, instead of local papers, but they also considered not advertising the permits at all as you can see in the email below. This is another example of why everyone should be concerned about FKAA’s plan to put in a pressurized sewer system since we cannot trust them and there is evidence that they have  deceived us and tried to avoid the law. Just a formality? I hope the State Attorney sees this, because I think it’ shows a criminal intent. And this guy is the head of engineering at FKAA? Stupid? God help us. Thank you CT for posting this because most news outlets seem to be ‘in the bag’ to FKAA for their advertising. “Mr. Iglehart, we heard from your staff today that an “Intent to Issue” may be utilized for the collection system permit on North Big Pine Key. FKAA strongly believes that such action will lead to an administrative hearing. We also believe the system is a straightforward design similar to the other collection systems in the Cudjoe Regional Wastewater System and should be handled similar to these other permit applications; without an Intent to Issue formality. As you know, a third party know as “Dump the Pump” is looking at any means to delay and uproot our project. They would certainly have a keen interest in filing a petition for an administrative hearing. An administrative hearing will cause a major delay leading to contract claims, missing deadlines and potential moratorium with loss of millions in Monroe County. Mr. Feldman would like to meet with you on this matter before you’ve made a final decision on issuing the permit for North Big Pine Key.  ~Tom G. Walker, P.E., Manager of engineering”
Springers-ad-750w
 Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to this email. All emails go to the Editor and all emails get read.
waxing-menu[“Females evolved to have less pubic hair”] Actually not, they either perform themselves, or have done, various hair removal techniques, like shaving, bikini waxing and electrolysis. Called by their styles and degree of pubic hair removal as Brazilians (some hair), Full Brazilians (no hair) or as one hair removal shop calls them, Peach Smoothies. Many guys are doing it too as to appear cleaner and have no painful, mood altering accidents with hair getting stuck in another’s teeth. Most guys now like their women with either no hair or a just a small trimmed strip at the top to point where the goods are. Girls like to be nearly bare there also now as it better encourages another to perform extensive cunnilingus if they look especially clean, smooth and something one would want to put their mouth on. You can certainly find the old hairy type porn if you search for it, but it’s a niche item now and no longer a popular trend with most recent porn actors.
[Sewers] Does anybody know for certain where the September 2012 Cudjoe sewer meeting was held? That would be the one before the presentation at the Sugarloaf Fire Department in October. FKAA lied to everyone there, same as at Sugarloaf. They said 600 “losers” (as George Neugent refers to them) would get grinder pumps out of 8800 sewer connections, while plans showing 2800 grinder pump stations were already out to bid. I think that is more than a lie; I think it’s fraud. The Federal funding regulations required that the people affected be told what was planned and be allowed input.So…Sept 2012 meeting memories anyone? Who presented? What FKAA or County people attended? http://dumpthepumps.com wants to know.
Johnsons-ad-750w
[Joke Friday] A father buys a lie detector robot that slaps people when they lie. He decides to test it out at dinner one night. The father asks his son what he did that afternoon. The son says, “I did some schoolwork. The robot slaps the son. The son says, “Ok, Ok. I was at a friend’s house watching movies.” Dad asks, “What movie did you watch?’ Son says, ‘Toy Story.” The robot slaps the son. Son says, ‘Ok, Ok, we were watching porn.” Dad says, “What? At your age I didn’t even know what porn was.” The robot slaps the father. Mom laughs and says, “Well, he certainly is your son.” The robot slaps the mother.
well bucket up down[Injection Wells] I have a question. Why is the FKAA using the deep hole in the ground system to dump waste water into? It seems to me they are doing exactly what our septic tanks have been doing all along, but it is going to cost us now. We have drain fields and they have drain holes, both dumping peepee and poopoo into the coral layers and hence into the ocean and water tables. The only logical system that should work is a good vacuum suction system taking all the poopoo and dirty water to the processing plant to make good water again and using the ‘dirt’ for fuel or fertilizer. Can anybody suggest a better way? It seems we have now been made to pay to poo when we had the same thing for free.
Shutting the bridges down after spending millions on repairs and new fencing along the Keys is sickening. Someone has to answer for this. And now taller fences and barbed wire? That will look great for families traveling through the Keys and hoping to fish. I would like to know who’s brother-in-law has a fence business and who got the kick back from this crap?
bluewater-750w
Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to this email. All emails go to the Editor and all emails get read.
lobster roll20 [“Food wagon somewhere in Maine”] That sounds like Red’s in Wiscasset.  Their lobster rolls are small and almost tasteless, but they were written up in for Fedoors and other gourmet restaurant reveiw magazines. There are much better places, just less advertised. Locals do not eat there just tourist.
[Iraq] Why do we have to be the suckers to send in air strikes on Iraq?  There are many countries right around there that have bombers that we gave or sold to them.  Hell, we gave the Iraqis billions of dollars worth of bombers and every other thing.  Screw that.  The Iraqis hate us and have said they don’t want us there and asked us to leave. I guess until they whistle for us we are supposed to drop everything and come running.  Screw the rest of the world and worrying what they think of us.  If we go back into Iraq they all will be laughing even louder at us then they already are.  Obama should just lay back and keep picking off the real bad guys with his drones just like he’s been doing all along.
accurate-home-insp-750w
[“Fox News leads in the ratings”] That is one scary thought and another sign that the Apocalypse is near at hand.  I find it fun to watch because to me it is the most outlandishly entertaining ongoing reality show of them all, complete with hot babes.   When I want up to date, concise actual news or factual  information I have been turning to Aljazeera.
monkey scratching Every time you feel yourself getting pulled into other peoples nonsense repeat these words: not my circus, not my monkeys.
A true friend unbosoms freely, advises justly, assists readily, adventures boldly, takes all patiently, defends courageously, and continues a friend unchangeably. ~William Penn
Chamber-ad-750w
Contact Us. Send us your comments and attach any stuff you want published to this email. All emails go to the Editor and all emails get read.
muscles-ct
I think there is a person on here who ask questions and then answers them himself the next day using Reddit. Let me help you out with some questions I have been pondering: What caused the Big Bang? What is “spooky action at a distance?” Why are Jersey women so dumpy? Why do the Keys bands murder Mustang Sally?
politics-zone-750w
A recent post in the Key West Citizen in Citizens Voice. “Hillary Clinton has handled her recent interviews with intelligence, clarity, wit and charm. So much for being brain dead.” Can someone please name anything that Hillary did while as First Lady, or Senator of New York or as Secretary of State? Why would you vote for her? Let me know…please
A man dies and goes to heaven.  When he gets to the pearly gates, facing St. Peter, he notes a big wall full of clocks. He asks St. Peter:- Why so many clocks on the wall? St. Peter replies: These clocks represent lies.  Each human being has one.  The more you lie, the faster the hands move. The man inquires further.- Whose clock is this?  The hands aren’t moving. St. Peter replies:It’s Mother Theresa’s clock.  The hands have never moved because she never lied in her life. The man inquires further:- Incredible~!  And whose clock is that other one~? St. Peter replies: That one belongs to Bill Clinton.  The hands haven’t stopped moving which means he lied a lot in his life. The man asks:Then where’s Barrack Obama’s clock? St. Peter replied:The clock that belongs to Obama is in Jesus’ office.  He uses it as a fan.
FTRs posting about the Bush lies and failures leading us to the Iraq war was pretty cavalier. Im paraphrasing but it was “hey what about that IRS scandal? This past year when I gave credit to our President for leaving Iraq FTR corrected me and said “Bush made an agreement” to leave Iraq so Obama shouldn’t get the credit. I agree my friend . Thanks for the help.
KFC UPDATE! Remember when Playboy magazine reportedly offered Sarah Palin $4,000,000 to pose nude in an issue? Then Michelle Obama was offered $50 by National Geographic? And when KFC offered a “Hillary” meal, consisting of two small breasts and two large thighs with MSG? Now KFC is offering the “Obama Cabinet Bucket.” It consists of nothing but left wings and chicken shit with Muslim Sauce.
from the right
bomb-iraqIn 1998 Bill Clinton ordered a military strike on Iraq. In explaining his motives he gave a speech on TV to the nation wherein he stated in part, “Earlier today, I ordered America’s armed forces to strike military and security targets in Iraq. They are joined by British forces. Their mission is to attack Iraq’s nuclear, chemical and biological weapons programs and its military capacity to threaten its neighbors. Their purpose is to protect the national interest of the United States, and indeed the interests of people throughout the Middle East and around the world. Saddam Hussein must not be allowed to threaten his neighbors or the world with nuclear arms, poison gas or biological weapons.” On October 10, 2002, Senator Hillary Clinton gave a Senate floor speech in support of invading Iraq. She said, in part: “Today we are asked whether to give the President of the United States authority to use force in Iraq should diplomatic efforts fail to dismantle Saddam Hussein’s chemical and biological weapons and his nuclear program.” She spoke of the UN inspectors in Iraq:” In the four years since the inspectors left, intelligence reports show that Saddam Hussein has worked to rebuild his chemical and biological weapons stock, his missile delivery capability, and his nuclear program. He has also given aid, comfort, and sanctuary to terrorists, including Al Qaeda members, though there is apparently no evidence of his involvement in the terrible events of September 11, 2001.” “It is clear, however, that if left unchecked, Saddam Hussein will continue to increase his capacity to wage biological and chemical warfare, and will keep trying to develop nuclear weapons. Should he succeed in that endeavor, he could alter the political and security landscape of the Middle East, which as we know all too well affects American security.” She ended her speech by saying: “So it is with conviction that I support this resolution as being in the best interests of our nation. A vote for it is not a vote to rush to war; it is a vote that puts awesome responsibility in the hands of our President and we say to him – use these powers wisely and as a last resort. And it is a vote that says clearly to Saddam Hussein – this is your last chance – disarm or be disarmed.”  H.C. ultimately voted for the war resolution, and in 2004 declared firmly that she had no regret for that vote In October 2002, Sen. John Kerry, D-Mass., was one of 29 Democrats in the U.S. Senate who voted to give GWB the authority  to attack Iraq unilaterally. Need I list all of the 29 Democrat Senators who were in favor of giving GWB the authority for a unilateral strike. In October 2002 Sen. Harry Reid voted give GWB the authority to attack Iraq unilaterally. Please recall that even though GWB had the authority to attack unilaterally, he did not. He forged a solid alliance of nations each of which contributed to the Iraq war effort, each was convinced that invading Iraq was a necessity for the security of the region. As of August 23, 2006, there were 21 non-U.S. military forces contributing armed forces to the Coalition in Iraq. When the Iraq  war was over, AQI had been driven from the land, the nation had had peaceful elections and had a fully functioning parliamentary government. We won that war.  That is what Obama inherited and what Obama’s feckless policies have ceded to Islamic terrorism. The world will suffer. crist20Part 2) Scott Rothstein is/was a fascinating character. Like Charlie Crist he is a walking charisma fountain. He had literally tons of money, nearly all of it gotten by operating one of our nation’s biggest Ponzi schemes, ever. Rothstein was a lawyer and a huge contributor to various political persons and causes. Especially Charlie Crist. He collected politicians like some folks collect sea shells. He had racks of them. It’s impossible to know why Charlie is so attracted to thieves and brigands like Rothstein, Pearlman, and Greer (more about him later), but they either flock to Charlie, or he flocks to them. Nonetheless, Charlie and Rothstein became skin on skin close. The list of gifts and favors to Charlie by Rothstein will fill pages. One example is a $52k birthday cake given to Charlie by Rothstein. Charlie flitted all over Florida and the US in Rothstein’s jets. They vacationed together, they partied together, they kept in constant communication. They were like teen BFF’s.  Incredibly, Crist took to calling himself Rothstein’s “favorite Greek governor” and calling Rothstein “my brother.” There came a time when Charlie appointed Rothstein to the Judicial Nominating Commission.  As part of its duties, that commission receives and considers applications from persons who want to be appointed to be a judge by the governor. The JNC interviews judicial applicants and makes recommendations to the governor as to which applicant(s) are worthy of appointment to the Bench. Remember that Rothstein was the head of a large law firm, and it stands to reason that he would be very interested in having judges appointed that would tend to favor his law firm and his clients. Appointment to the JNC for a slimeoid like Rothstein is pure gold. Charlie delivered the gold. It was a quid pro quo. Check this out, it’s just a taste. Link This is a must read if you are interested in good governance for Florida. Lin More Sunday, much more to come. Thanks for stopping by. Respectfully submitted: FTR