Friday, July 4, 2014

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The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-CoconutsThe Original Unsocial Media. Anonymous Letters to the Editor with Pictures. Published Daily by Noon Since 2002. No Saturday Edition

0 july 4 fireworks an 350h
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wild no age limit
[Naked Month] I make a motion to the Monroe County Commission to have a July or August, or both, Naked Month throughout the entire Keys! Just like several of our un-named islands which we use to totally tan, we should have all the Keys do the same. The problem is the Snowbirds kind of stick out in the crowd more ways than one. Please dress for dinner though.
[“Mangrove Mama’s”] Any good reviews of that place are from those liking deep fried food or anything they offer besides the food.
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[Hickory House] We should all thank Pritam Singh for rescuing the County from that Hickory House debacle.   It looks like he is going to make a silk purse out of that sow’s ear.  We could treat him to lunch at that new restaurant on the northeast side of Summerland. It looks like the owner put a lot of money into the place.
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This, then, is, the state of the union: Free and restless, growing and full of hope. So it was in the beginning. So it shall always be, while God is willing, and we are strong enough to keep the faith.
How often we fail to realize our good fortune in living in a country where happiness is more than a lack of tragedy. Freedom is the oxygen of the soul. God Bless America, have a blessed and safe 4th of July.  ~Coconuts
[“Mangrove Mama’s”] The only reason they do any business at all is they have a captive audience from the camp ground across the street.
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[“What a life”] My brother once told me if I can pay my bills, eat a pizza and watch a good TV show, what else is there? So I really cant tell if you are happy or sad. I know you are not alone in how you spend your days.

Helpline in Key West needs phone people, Dumpthepumps.com needs researchers. People need pet sitters. The animal shelter needs people to come walk the dogs. Reach out if you are getting too bored–you’re still needed.

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If I have to watch Bill Becker in his commercial about the underwater music festival one more time I’m going to turn inside out. “I get to pick the music, and I live in a vacuum.”
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[Crook] A former administrator in the work release program at the Monroe County Sheriff’s Office pleaded guilty to stealing thousands of dollars in Social Security benefits. The thief, Roginia Robinson, received probation and had to pay $26,000 back. She was cashing Social Security widow benefits checks.
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Why aren’t there any more people engraving the Lord’s Prayer on grains of rice? Did they eventually realize that no one cared how they wasted their time or how useless the Lord’s Prayer on a grain of rice was?
Mangrove Mama’s is old and needs TLC agreed, but they do cook good at times. HH[?] is great too! They also have really good entertainment. We have no problems with that place! To each his own as they say.
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happy 4th confettiHappy 4th of July from Springer’s Bar and Grill. Today’s special is a shrimp corn dog. It’s our twist on a traditional classic. We love to turn it up a notch.
Happy Hour 2-7 daily with great drink specials and happy hour menu.
How about a little baseball tidbit for you. Test your knowledge about this all American sport. What pitcher threw a no hitter on the 4th of July?
That would be Dave Righetti of the NY Yankees in 1983. But perhaps the wildest game ever played happened on July 4 between the Atlanta Braves and the New York Mets. It went 19 innings and ended close to 4 AM. Mets won 16-13.

Don’t forget we will be at Big Pine Park today for the 4th of July festivities. We will be serving up our delicious BBQ pork sandwiches for $5.00 with a free drink. So come on out, enjoy a bite, hang with friends and watch the amazing fireworks display. What a way to celebrate this Independence Day!
There’s Always Something Special at Springer’s.

[Time Warp] If I was to awaken tomorrow in my room at the Tiltin’ Hilton after a ride down the Overseas Highway from Okeechobee and walk outside into a time warp and saw the old Bubba cops holding court in the old city garage next to police station at the Tiltin’s back door, I would be happy as a pig in shit because at least then folks were honest about who and what they were. People did not smile while pissing on your foot and telling you its raining. And next generations who made out on those folks’ dealings acting like they are better than thou when it’s the same damn money your families made. You just cleaned it up a little and screwed up the entire city with it. A Starbucks in every t-shirt shop and a Hyatt or Marriot on every block is maybe what Key West deserves. The Waffle House is still the best example of the decline of civilized Key West. Or maybe it started before that with the demise of the Boca Chica Bar. At least when politicians were sleeping off hangovers from watching the sunrise at the county line they were not showing the arrogance and stupidity they exhibit while awake and at city hall.
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[“Mangrove Mama’s”] When they first opened I got their Hog fish basket which had 3 huge chunks of nice hog fish for $12.95.  I just went today and got 4 small 1″ x 2″ chunks for $14.95 plus tax ($16.00 total).  If you don’t consider the value of the fries (lots of those) then the fish is $4 a mini-chunk that equals $1 a bite.

I wont go back.  As a working local I can’t afford their large prices and small portions. ~islandwitt@yahoo.com

july 4th drum
OAR – Peace (New Song). I want Peace.  Happy 4th of July!
[Crook] Charles R. Jamison, 74, of Little Torch Key, sold juvenile bonnethead sharks taken from the Florida Keys National Marine Sanctuary and the Key Deer National Wildlife Refuge, a big no no.
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Isn’t punctuality a virtue of the lonely?
Plagued by sea-level rise, Kiribati buys land in Fiji. Good thing it’s not happening around here, according to our local barstool experts. Link
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I like Cuban bananas best of all the bananas because the small plump fruit has an almost fruit cocktail flavor.
[Public’s Water Access] Pritam Singh says he’ll allow the public access to the water at his Oceanside Marina development if the County gives him the small road that goes there. I don’t believe it. Tank Island (Sunset Key) had a similar agreement where the public always would have access to the water, but we don’t–we have to pay for the access.
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[Paper] How many trees would be saved to clean our air of pollution in all mail was electronic, all advertising the same, and books, newspapers, and magazines were also? But of course the housing industry would eat them up, right? That is all we need, more breeding bunkers.
[“Mangrove Mama’s”] I’m sorry you had such a bad experience. We go there regularly and enjoy it very much. We know the food isn’t as good as Square Grouper or Kaya’s (we go there too), but for good drink, music, and some food it’s a very nicely priced alternative. Sunday brunches used to be stellar with Carl Hatfield signing, but I think he’s off for the summer months..
I had a bad first experience at Café Sole, but when I gave them a second chance, it was delightful and so was the 3rd, 4th, 5th. Don’t be quick to judge on one experience.
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Why do divers openly invade my fishing space, yet I’m suppose to keep a safe distance from them?
sold out4Did you see where Reef Relief came out in favor of having no delays in completing a central sewer system? Reef Relief used to have some credibility but they lost most of that when they supported dredging to enable bigger cruise ships to visit Key West. Shilling for FKAA and supporting effluent disposal that does not even meet minimum DEP requirements was a great way to lose the rest of their credibility.

Why rush to install a sewer system that will cause more harm than what we have now? A six month delay to redesign properly could make all the difference in water quality and save millions in faulty construction. The Keys already missed one State mandate deadline by over 5 years, so what’s another year to get it right? Reef Relief does not seem to really care about the facts or the reef, just political connections.

I will not be buying a Reef Relief license plate or supporting them further in any way. I believe they are now bought. Do not confuse REEF in Key Largo with Reef Relief from Key West. They are very different organizations and I heartily support REEF

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[4th of July Bacon] You’re welcome America! Link
[Happy Birthday Rube] On this date in 1883 Reuben Garrett Lucius Goldberg was born. Better know as Rube Goldberg. He is best known for a series of popular cartoons depicting complicated gadgets that perform simple tasks in indirect, convoluted ways. The world’s most awesome Rube Goldberg kinetic sculpture. Rube would be proud. Video
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[Sewers] Note to the FKAA: If you people think for one second you are going to drive the locals out of these islands by screwing over us with this sewer scam to drive down property values, you are sadly mistaken. If you think we will let you build above ground sewer mechanisms that make million dollar neighborhoods look like shanty towns, you are sadly mistaken. Either you stop what you are doing until it is redesigned correctly or we the people will get new blood in that FKAA building and get it right our way!
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 I’ve been seeing more and more white crowned pigeons in the last few days. I wonder what they eat as the poisonwood berries won’t be ripe for another few weeks.
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[The Movies] How come in the movies when a guy shaves he just wipes off the soap and gets dressed? I don’t shave but imagine that soap film must feel sticky and uncomfortable. They don’t wipe after sex either. Now, I know that’s sticky and uncomfortable!
 I recently received an email from a member of the Iguana Killers Club confirming his 400 and 401 iguana kills. Congratulations to the IKC and all it’s members in their continuing effort to rid the keys of those disgusting disease carrying creatures.
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[“Tailgating”] I am truly sorry for pissing off some of the decent people on here by complaining about the Miami driver, 4 feet behind me doing 55mph.  I did forget to mention that I was in a 45 mph zone at the time.  Am I decent enough for you now?
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FKAAEMALL
[Buy Local] A marketing firm that is paid by businesses to rate the products they sell, then poll a bunch of folks who can’t think for themselves, and rely on slick marketing to make the choices they choose, and don’t try one of thousands of mom and pop places in any given area that was polled. Makes a person right? No, that makes you a well trained corporate capitalist sheep who will never truly enjoy a meal from someplace run by people who look at you like a potential new friend when you walk in. Instead you will keep eating substandard corp swill fed to you by clever marketing. Oh look, y’all, you can eat prime rib at Cracker Barrel for $8 all you can eat. “Hurry maw, grab the chillins, the picture box say it good.” Or should that be, “Get the car, Harold, Golden Corral got 5 dollar T bones till 5:30.” Yea, you go ahead I will hit Murray’s, Five Brothers or Big Pine Diner. If in Key West: El Siboney, Daddy Bones or again 5 Brothers! No need for a TV ad if you’re good. Shop local, buy local, play local, be local.
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RE:It should be obvious to anyone . Yes it should,that President Obama will go down in history as the most incompetent President our great America has had to live through. He is now rated below President Bush & President Richard Nixon. Have a blessed,safe and very happy 4th of July.
It should be obvious to anyone with half a brain left This is exactly why Democraps are the only ones who understand their wtisted logic!
from the right
(Ed: Where’s FTR?)