Letters to the editor with pictures since 2002. Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage days, Tuesdays and Fridays.
 [Corrupt Doctors] Here is a site where you can search for your doctor’s name and see how much they reported taking from drug companies. There are some big names in Key West taking several thousand dollars. Whose drugs do you think they are going to prescribe. Some Miami docs are getting more Big Pharma dollars than some people make working all year. Link |
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| [Gun Control] You know if 5 and 6 year old kids can cope with active shooter drills, then gun owners can deal with background checks, waiting periods and red flag laws. |
[The Black Swan] Back in the day the Black Swan on Big Pine was the best low life bar there was. Nobody was unemployed. They were all fishermen. Good fishermen. They got their girlfriends to both jobs on time. I don’t think you could really get thrown out for more than today. I can’t remember the lady’s name that ran it forever. I’m going with Marie. Please correct me [Betty]. It was beer forever. Then the restraint and booze. Another fond memory passes on. |
| [Use It Or Lose It] Help your man avoid prostate cancer. The Journal of the American Medical Association reports that guys who ejaculated more than 21 times per month had a significantly lower risk of prostate cancer. |
Maybe not the best abbreviation for “assorted”. |
| [Politically Correct] Someone wrote that it was okay to upset, insult, or denigrate others as long as you were not being politically correct. Being PC is wrong in this mouth breather’s opinion. People like him are what’s wrong with this country. Sure, being PC is sometimes taken too far, but being considerate of each other is never wrong. |
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| It’s funny that oil prices just happen to go up as fall and winter approach. Seems like this happens every year. |
 [Dirty Restaurant] Coral Crab Cafe, 2001 S. Roosevelt Blvd., Key West: We know things can be a little more casual in the Keys, but, come on… “Hot water not provided/shut off at employee handwash sink. Observed kitchen hand wash sinks not operating.” Water wasn’t going to the mop sink, either. The rodents remained regular about the whole thing, however.. “Observed approximately 15 rodent droppings located on top of the dish machine in the kitchen…three rodent droppings on the prep kitchen floor located across from the (three-compartment sink)…four rodent droppings located in the kitchen dry storage room.” “Interior of oven has heavy accumulation of black substance/grease/food debris.” “Cutting board stained/soiled.”The Coral Crab’s SpongeBob’s and Squidwards cleaned things up for Thursday’s re-inspection. ~aslllandlllas@yahoo.com |
Underwater footage from Fiji & Tonga. Great under water video. |
| Is it me, or do the “Jersey Girl” memes get even funnier the thousandth time it’s shared? It is just me? |
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| [“Crime Down Under”] To the poster that said they had a few friends that live in Australia and New Zealand . I don’t know where his/her friends live in those countries, but they may want to move to a different part of town. According to Fox News, that bastion of crime, including murders, have gone down in both countries. They say that the liberal media has exaggerated the difference, but that all crimes had gone down, that’s a little different than “through the roof.” In case you’re uninformed, apparently like your friends, the same device you used to write that diatribe can be used to research these statements before one appears uninformed. No one likes to look stupid. |
How many bridges are there in the Keys? The Miami herald says 42, but I remember that number at 28. |
| [Heating Vegetable Oil] A new study out of the University of Massachusetts looked at mice given vegetable oil that’s typically used to fry foods. And, boy, was it a freak show. Their colons were inflamed and leaking and started sprouting tumors. That’s absolutely terrifying, but then things got even worse. On account of all the gut leakage, the mice started getting bacteria and other dangerous toxins in their bloodstreams. All from a little vegetable oil. |
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| [Tipping] In England they call the dump the tip. I assume that is where the “tipping fee” at our dump comes from. |
[Parking] They are going to charge for parking at Smathers Beach. The last place on the island where fun was free. Key West’s time has expired. |
| The next Super Bowl will be in Miami. Here’s how all the others here played out. Link |
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| [Tourism] This is what you need to know about the Florida Keys. Video |
 [Blood Brothers Africa 1888] let us see the blood mingle, and never a cloud shall come between you while you are in the land; the belongings of Mazamboni are yours, his warriors, wives, children, the land and all that stands on the face of it are yours. Have I said well, oh, warriors? Then the mutual right hands of my son, Mr. Jephson, who volunteered to be sacrificed, were clasped crosswise over the crossed knees, the native professor of medicine made a slight incision in his arm until the red blood dyed it. My professor of secret ritualism caused the dark red blood of Mazamboni to well out of the vein, and as the liquid of life flowed and dropped over the knees, the incantations were commenced by the sage with the white beard, and as he shook the pebbles in the magic gourd at the range of the peak opposite, and at the horse-shoe range yonder in the plains, and to eastward and westward of the valley, he delivered his terrible curses from the summit of Nzera-Kum, and all men listened unto him with open lips incanted, “”Cursed is he who turneth his back against his friend. “Cursed is he who in the day of war denieth his brother. “Cursed is he who deviseth evil to his friend whose blood has become one with his own. “May the itch make him loathsome, and the hair of his head be lost by the mange; may the adder wait for him by the path, and the lion meet him on his way; may the leopard in the darkness besiege his house, and his wife when she draweth water from the stream, be seized; may the barbed arrow pin his entrails, and the sharp spear be dyed in his vitals; may sickness waste his strength, and his days be narrowed with disease; may his limbs fail him in the day of battle, and his arms stiffen with cramps,” |
| [Man Nipples] Dr. Billy Goldberg, M.D. in his co-authored book “Why Do Men Have Nipples” informs us that “Male circumcision removes 33 to 50% of the penile skin, as well as nearly all of the penile fine-touch neuroreceptors.” Think of it as being skinned alive as a baby. |
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| [Note to Stoners] Did you ever walk into a Winn Dixie and wonder if you were the highest person in the room? |
[“14 oz cups”] Friday’s beer cup test was bogus. You were using an approximation of 12 ounces by refilling an empty 12 ounce bottle to an arbitrary level you thought correct. Any type of valid test would require a measuring cup or other standard measurement container. |
| It always amazes me how politicians say what people want to hear no matter if they are bull shitting or out right lying–and the gullible eat it up. The politicos are there for one reason, money. Money buys power and power gets egos inflated. If people analyzed politicians deeply, there would be very few politicos that work for a living. What this country needs is more DT’S[?] and others that want to get us back to a united country and hard working real people, not the free riders we are falling for! Wake up America. |
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