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Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage pick-up days:
Tuesdays and Fridays.
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 Ladies & Gentlemen, boys & girls, children of all ages Wetstock 19: A DAY of PEACE & MUSIC will be Sunday May 26, 2024. The bands are Bobby Howard & The Ukeholics, Stormfront, and Circ 22.I have repeatedly said I was done putting on this event the past few years. It’s a lot to deal with sometimes. However, making it this far I have decided to shoot for 2 more with Wetstock 2.0 possibly being a 2-day event and absolutely my last! A 20-year celebration with a 2 day blow with some of the bands we’ve had over the years, and possibly more. The 2 day celebration of 20 years is not definite at this time, but, we’ll see…Take only pictures and leave only footprints. Treat others as you wish to be treated. Your friend, Flip Flop Bob |
| [Computer Club] Saturday, April 13, 10:30 a.m. at the Big Pine Community Center, Winn Dixie Plaza I hope everyone’s eyes are recovered after staring at the Eclipse. Full Menu > Ongoing Events > Computer Club |
 [7 Mile Bridge Closed] The bridge will be closed This Saturday morning from 6 to 9 for the famed 7 Mile Bridge Run. Link |
| [Friday Joke] The IRS suspected a fishing boat owner wasn’t paying proper wages to his deckhand and sent an agent to investigate him. IRS AUDITOR: “I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them”. Boat Owner: “Well, there’s T-boi , my deckhand, he’s been with me for 3 years. I pay him $1,000 a week plus free room and board. Then there’s the mentally challenged guy. He works about 18 hours every day and does about 90% of the work around here. He makes about $10 per week, pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of jack Daniel’s Tennessee honey and a dozen Bush wackas every Saturday night so he can cope with life. He also gets to sleep with my wife occasionally”. IRS AUDITOR: “That’s the guy I want to talk to – the mentally challenged one”. Boat Owner: “That would be me. What would you like to know?” |
 [“Not one successful Socialist government”] Iceland, Norway, Finland, Denmark, Sweden all have successful socialist governments. Portugal, Spain, Belgium, Ireland, Netherlands and China do too, but some readers might not agree so I didn’t include them in the first list. |
| [Editor: If you can’t access bigpinekey.com in the coming weeks, it is because GoDaddy is migrating CloudLinux 7 to CloudLinux 8 on the server. We don’t know when they will do it so or if it will effect the viewer experience. I’m just letting you know that it’s not your computer that prevents you from opening this website but on the server side. Link) |
 [Monarch Butterflies are All Diseased] They all have a debilitating parasite. You Floridians are not helping the monarchs as much as you think you are, and in fact you are probably causing considerable harm. monarchs across most of the state of Florida are heavily infected with a debilitating parasite (Ophryocystis elektroscirrha, or OE) that weakens the infected butterflies themselves (if they live to their adult stage), reduces their lifespan, and it is now spreading into the rest of the N. American population, and hindering the famous migration to Mexico. Each milkweed that they touch (or even hover over), gets contaminated with the infectious spores of the parasite, which then get eaten by the hungry caterpillars, thereby perpetuating the cycle. Nowadays, all of Florida’s monarchs are heavily infected, and are now present all year, largely thanks to people in the state just like you. Thanks to people planting lots of milkweed, especially non-native milkweed, which encourages year-round residency and winter-breeding, which is the perfect recipe for heavy OE infections. Tropical milkweed has exploded in Florida over the last 20 years, and this is also a new thing. You can “fix” this by cutting back your milkweed, but that is just wishful thinking.
You’re not going to like this first (and most important) recommendation – the OE situation in Florida is now so out of control that I’m actually recommending that people in Florida remove all of their milkweed in their own yards – both native and non-native. Yikes! I know this sounds crazy, but that’s how bad it’s gotten now. Link |
 [Immunity From Prosecution] King Charles 1 argued that he was immune to prosecution for the many crimes the people accused him of. He lost and they cut off his head. On Saturday 27 January 1 649, the parliamentarian High Court of Justice had declared Charles guilty of attempting to “uphold in himself an unlimited and tyrannical power to rule according to his will, and to overthrow the rights and liberties of the people” and he was sentenced to death by beheading. |
| ADHD may have evolved to give us foraging superpowers. They analyzed data from 457 adults who played an online foraging game, where the objective was to collect as many berries as possible within an eight-minute span. Plus other weird things we learned this week. Link |
 The view of Earth from the International Space Station during the eclipse. NASA |
| [Help Wanted] Congressman Carlos A. Giménez (FL-28) announced that he is seeking a Veteran, Gold Star Family Member, or Active-Duty Spouse for a paid position handling casework related to veterans in his Miami district office. Link |
 Bill to make marrying your first cousin illegal in Tennessee passes. Glad we got that out of the way (Two Republican lawmakers voted against making marriage between first cousins illegal in Tennessee.) |
| CNN’s Abby Phillip fact-checks Tucker Carlson’s statements about US media coverage of Russian President Vladimir Putin and his war against Ukraine. Link |
 Breaking News! OJ’s death bed confession to LA’s finest Police Squad. |
| [Transgender Research Stifled] Critical thinking and open debate are pillars of scientific and medical research. Yet experienced professionals are increasingly scared to openly discuss their views on the treatment of children questioning their gender identity. This is from a review of gender identity services for children this week, which warned that a toxic debate had resulted in a culture of fear. This conclusion was echoed by doctors, academic researchers and scientists, who have said this climate has had a chilling effect on research in an area that is in desperate need of better evidence. Professionals in the field are scared to discuss views amid risk of reputational damage and online abuse. |
 [Dog Poops on Plane] United Airlines flight forced to land after dog poops in first class aisle. The smell was “so bad in the first class bathroom that even after cleaning they still closed it for the rest of the flight. A traveler who claimed to be on the plane said the excrement was in “a very liquid form.” Link |
| [Space Telescope Live] What is Webb observing now? Link |
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| [Internet Fees] Internet providers must now be more transparent about fees, pricing. Much like nutritional labels on food products, “broadband labels” for internet packages will soon tell you just what is going into the pricing of your service, thanks to new rules adopted by the Federal Communications Commission this week. Link |
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 [Fancy Egg Salad Sandwich] This is not your typical egg salad sandwich. This is a high-class, tantalizingly tasty Fancy Egg Sandwich that takes the classic egg salad game to the next level. Even with its added fanciness it is still quick, easy, and tastes like it’s from a cafe! The homemade mayo is creamier and more flavorful than anything you’ll find in a jar. The eggs are still fluffy and savory, pairing so well with the crunchy chives and the mayo. Fancy Egg Salad Sandwich spreads perfectly over your favorite bread and will become one of your favorite lunches after just one bite. Recipe |
| [Friday Joke] Why did the runner refuse to race on the 7 Mile Bridge? Because they heard it was a marathon, not a “marathong”! |
 [Trial of the Century] O.J. Simpson, football star whose trial riveted the nation, dies at 76. He ran to football fame and made fortunes in movies. His trial for the murder of his former wife and her friend became an inflection point on race in America. |
| [Friday Joke] A young woman was pulled over for speeding. A Pennsylvania State Trooper walked to her car window, flipping open his ticket book. She said, “I bet you are going to try to sell me a ticket to the Pennsylvania Trooper’s Ball.” He replied, “Pennsylvania State Troopers don’t have balls.” There was a moment of silence. He closed his ticket book, tipped his hat, got back in his patrol car and left. |
 [Old People] Up at my kids WP beach condo, the old maintenance worker got into an argument with an older female resident tenant feeding bread to ducks in the retention pond. He said stop feeding, she’d didn’t. He turned his leaf blower loose on the lady and her bread feeding. She grabbed him and threatened to “kiss his ass”. Can’t make this up! |
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| The current Coconut Telegraph was published on 4/12/24 at 9:10 am. |