BigPineKey.com

Wednesday, August 26, 2015

The-Coconut-Telegraph-w-Coconuts

Since 2002. Published Wednesdays and Saturdays

national politics an(Click here)
wetstock11--9.6.15

 

Wetstock 11 September 6 at Picnic Island.

[Hero Justice?] A decorated Special Forces combat dive instructor in Key West, Sgt. 1st Class Charles Martland,  is getting kicked out of the Army for shoving an Afghan police commander who confessed to raping a little 12 year old boy and beating up his mother when she tried to report him. In a letter obtained by the Army Times, Martland wrote he and his team had seen Afghan police officers beating, conducting honor killings and raping villagers and not being punished. “My detachment commander and I felt that morally we could no longer stand by and allow our (Afghan allies) to commit atrocities,” Martland reportedly said in the letter.
616 Eaton Street[Disband HARC] HARC started out real well as a grassroots organization until developers and architects took over. Then HARC started to only hinder the homeowner for making improvements on their historic homes. All the while they permitted absurd stucco and styrofoam commercial enterprises like the new McMansion development at 616 Eaton Street. I say get rid of HARC not single family 200 year old wooden houses. HARC is nothing but rubber-stampers for developers and the self-serving architects and builders on the committee who are trying to change Old Town.

HARC used to be important, but they’ve sold out to developers and the fear of the developer’s lawyers. Here’s how it works. A developer wants to build something non conforming to HARC’s guidelines and adds a bunch of stuff that he knows will never be approved. He submits his plans, HARC makes him remove the extra stuff that he doesn’t even want, his development gets approved. It’s a dog and pony show and those of us who love Old Town should really be pissed at their latest affront to our historic sensibilities.

HARC is a shell of it’s former honorable self, allowing aluminum shutters, aluminum windows, white roof coating on historic metal roofs, and now this modern abstract complex at 616 Eaton Street that will replace a 200 year old single family home that was built around the time of our American Revolution. It is dolorous that this once honorable group dedicated to protecting our historic past has lost its way.

Old Town Key West contains the largest collection of historic wooden buildings in America and the balless, self-interested, wimps at HARC aren’t doing much to protect them.

moon-lellyfish25

 

[Moon Jellyfish] We tried to go diving Tuesday morning, but the moon jellyfish were so thick you could walk on them. The same thing happened last year at this time.

A drunken Key Largo man, Daniel Michael Szabo, 40, who shot at Coast Guard crewmen and rammed their response boat several times during a pursuit on the water Friday night was arrested and will likely face decades in federal prison.
selfie-shark

 

I took a guest out to the reef last week and he took video of everything with one of those selfie sticks and a Hero camera. It was annoying. I had to tell him not to take my picture. I didn’t want to be in his travelogue. I don’t think he noticed much as he was always taking pictures.

I had about ten attempts at hacking my web site today. This time they were all from Brazil. That’s a first. I guess the crooks in the flavelas finally have gotten computers.
gomam

 

[Gomam] What’s in a name?

[Political Test] This takes a good bit of time but it is interesting.  Be sure to check on the side the importance of the question. Make sure you click on the additional questions at the end of each section.​ Be sure to move the importance spot on the left and use the “other” choice often —it is very informative.  It is very well done and worth your time. Link
Ed-Krane-KarschHometown PAC’s Meet the Candidates event yesterday evening was about 99 percent white people, which was no surprise. The event did, however, produce a few surprises generally, and a couple of personal insights. During the break, I tried to have a conversation with Ed “Krane” Karsch, who has pre-filed to run for mayor next year. I tried, but Ed did not even see, or hear me trying. He seemed to be talking to himself. I told a fellow sitting next to me, that Ed is all wrapped up in himself, has no self awareness; he looks and acts like a TV evangelist. When the break ended, the moderator began with Karsch, who said nothing that caused me to think he knows what’s going on in city government and the “hot” and “pressing” issues the city faces. Maybe he’s just what the city needs for its next mayor.
[Tense] You can’t run through a campground. you can only ran, because it’s past tents.
balloons9

 

[The Balloon Crisis] Evidently someone thinks we use too many balloons in the Keys. I’ll stop.

[NATIONAL POLITICS] I am having a little trouble understanding the Trump post, Rick Scott post, etc. The one regarding abortion was also very political. Either you do or you don’t accept political post. Of course it’s your site to do with as you please. I’m just a corn-fused old man with a question, if I respond to the making fun of Trump or using my tax dollars to kill babies and sell body parts or stick up for our Rick Scott I will be directed to the National Politics page. It seems very leftish, don’t you think. PS, I don’t really care about Trump or Scott. The abortion post is very different, killing babies & selling baby parts is disgusting and very wrong. To use my tax dollars to support that ugly business is unacceptable. Have a blessed day (Ed: If you are referring to Saturday’s toupee image, I think all would think that was funny and not political. I don’t recall the other posts you mention being on the CT since I started the NATIONAL POLITICS page. Everyone laughs at Trump’s hair. His hair has nothing to do with his politics. Do you think people might not vote for him because he has bad hair, or lack of them. I don’t. Sometimes a joke is just a joke with no political implications.)
squeeze oil gas earth

A barrel of U.S. crude oil fell below $40 per barrel for the first time since the end of the global economic crisis. Friday’s fall, to $39.86, was just the latest indicator of a vast shift in the energy landscape over the past year. The price of oil has fallen for eight consecutive weeks, the longest streak since 1986. A boom in production has outpaced growth in global oil demand. The U.S. is churning out oil at a rate not seen in decades. Meanwhile, even with sharply lower prices, Saudi Arabia and other OPEC nations haven’t cut production.

[Crooks] That was an amazing compilation of local environmental crimes and fraud that someone posted on Wednesday 8/19/15. Kudos to the writer. He has saved me a lot of work. I think I know where to send that list to shake things up around here. it is about time for some personal accountability, don’t you think?
father36

 

Suddenly, Father Schober was not sure whether he really should have bought the new crucifix at Ikea.

“Welcome to the mental health hotline. If you are obsessive compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.”
hemp-
There’s an annual contest at Bond University, Australia, calling for the most appropriate definition of a contemporary term. This year’s chosen term was “political correctness.” The winning student wrote:
“Political correctness is a doctrine, fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rapidly promoted by mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a piece of shit by the clean end.”
moon12On August 27th. you’ll see 12 moons in the sky, but only one will be the moon. The other 11 will be figments of your delusional imagination, because you are gullible, and will fall for anything on the internet. Seeing 12 moons in the sky won’t happen, just like seeing two won’t happen either. Just like seeing two won’t happen, Mars or any other planet won’t appear as large as a full moon as seen from earth. No one alive has ever witnessed this happening, and never will.
[Malfeasance] Dear Commissioner George,
Please explain to the taxpayers of Monroe County how an egress, owned by the State of Florida to a City of Marathon tourists attraction became the financial responsibility for the taxpayers of Monroe County? The TDC advised me that state statues forbid the use of TDC funds for that. Donation? What taxpayer funds are used to provide ferry service to Pigeon Key, a secondary City of Marathon tourist attraction? It appears that the Pigeon Key Foundation had coerced Marathon residents and Monroe County Commissioners George & David along with the Key Largo Comm. Sylvia into misappropriating $9,000,000 of Monroe County taxpayers infrastructure sales tax monies earmarked for “a complete & fully funded” sewer system, so that the Foundation member will be able to take their morning walk without fear of traffic. Now if the City of Marathon residents choose to contribute to that folly, that’s their business. However there’s around 3000 Monroe County taxpayers that are actively being extorted to give up their property so these three Commissioners wouldn’t have to come up with the $1600 each for a traffic bearing cover, about $4.8 million dollars that the taxpayers voted to spend.Those same Commissioners voted to spend that infrastructure sales tax monies to buy the lids & supply electricity for the taxpayers on Grassy Key & the turd grinders were put in the row with no attempt to extort private property. Why did those three Commissioners choose to discriminate against those 3000 resident taxpayers? So Commissioners, explain to the taxpayers or, are the three of you north of the 7mile bridge guilty of misappropriating taxpayer funds, and possibly Sunshine Law violations? The taxpayers want to know.
segway9

 

Redneck Segway

[Down The Tubes] I just came back from CA, and clicked on the Coconut Telegraph. What a change! It looks like the blog has gone down the tubes like others because it only posts uninteresting and unimportant things and nothing worth reading anymore. Even the Political Page is terrible.
stuck-in-toilet

[Ongoing Toilet Seat Dilemma]  My name is Humphrey and I couldn’t get my bum free because “herself” cleaned the toilet and left the seat up! On and on it goes.

On Saturday’s  post, how much flour do you add to the spice mix for the KFC secret recipe?
monkey-toolThere are people on this planet so distorted in their thinking, they actually will not go along with anything they did not invent or think up. It is scary to know a person will see it only their way and not have the logic or basic common sense to judge right from wrong. Jury trials have been proven to be nothing more than ‘personal taste decisions. Voting is the same way most times. People’s race, stature, dress, manners, sex, whatever can make some inept person inflect pain or even death just because of their reaction to the another person’s presence. And we call ourselves civilized humans, when in fact, we are nothing more than primitives with tools.
Every time I open my mouth, some idiot starts talking.
help wanted sm

Driver needed for weekly route. Bee’s Honey Pots. CDL not needed. Contact John 305-872-2287.

The United States Navy Band’s “Concert on the Avenue” Navy Memorial. This is the Jersey Boys (all Frankie Valli & 4 Seasons songs) segment. GO NAVY! Video
cadillac-welfare

 

[Welfare] 13 kids 3 of the fathers in jail and a Cadillac with food stamps as the tag number. Hello America!  Take pride writing your tax checks to Uncle Sam. It goes to a bad cause.

American heroes take down Paris train jihadi who opened fire. Video
1930-Henderson-Custom-Motorcycle-3

 

1930 Henderson motorcycle. Very cool!

[Dazzle Them] I saw a band the other night that had a great looking female singer, but they had her covered up by a wall of drums and you could barely see her face. Marketing 101 basics: if you have an item that attracts attention, put it out front where people can see it!
artist man easel

I am interested in advertising in-home private art lessons in big pine key and our surrounding area. I will teach small groups to paint a finished piece in a couple of hours time in my house or a location they choose and provide all the tools and canvas. klancaster@tidewateritch.com

[Gerrymandering] The political maneuvering of boundaries to change political power. Example. Monroe County District #2 the lower Keys. The lower Keys was defined as from the south end of the 7Mile Bridge to Big Coppitt Key — period. Then along comes gerrymandering and from the approximately 15000 registered voters falling between the south end of the 7Mile Bridge to Big Coppitt Key a few hundred voters were magically moved to the incorporated City of Marathon, formerly known to be part of the middle Keys. Strangely enough Commissioner George Nugent happens to reside in this gerrymandered area, shifting the political power to north of the 7 Mile Bridge. Consequently, the cause of the cluster f**k currently known as the CRWS. Well folks, be careful what you wish for. Look what you got. And they thought the other candidate was a crook!
mosquito-man

 

[Genetically Engineered Mosquitoes] Dengue fever, which infects 400 million people worldwide, and the mosquitoes that have been genetically engineered to curb it. The mosquitoes serve a purpose or they wouldn’t be in that niche ecologically. Guess we’ll find out what it was. They got rid of snakes in part of India and were soon overrun with rats! “What could possibly go wrong?” asked the guy who crossed honeybees with African bees.

The best way to change a woman’s mind is to agree with her.
perscription rx

[Nature RX] For what ails you: prescription strength nature. Set in the world of a spoofed prescription drug commercial, Nature Rx offers a hearty dose of laughs and the outdoors. Video

[Immigration] In the first place, we should insist that if the immigrant who comes here in good faith becomes an American and assimilates himself to us, he shall be treated on an exact equality with everyone else, for it is an outrage to discriminate against any such man because of creed, or birthplace, or origin. But this is predicated upon the person’s becoming in every facet an American, and nothing but an American. There can be no divided allegiance here. Any man who says he is an American, but something else also, isn’t an American at all. We have room for but one flag, the American flag. We have room for but one language here, and that is the English language. And we have room for but one sole loyalty and that is a loyalty to the American people.  ~Theodore Roosevelt 1907
search magnify glassI am trying to get in touch with Eric Fletcher.  He resides in Marathon, may be in Big Pine now.  If you know him, or see him, please tell him to call Mama Pat in Marathon. Please & thanks.
[Windows 10]  I’ve been working on Cortana today & I finally got her to sing me a song & tell me a joke. But mostly she prints out her answers. Link
canoe2[Making a Canoe] Primitives would drive a premeasured peg into the outside of a tree that had been already shaped into the form of a canoe. Then when they cut away the insides and hit the peg they would know that they had reached the proper thickness for the canoe’s wall. They would then stop removing material so as not to cut through the newly formed hull.
Sex is like masturbation, only with someone else.
down collapse

[Beginning of the End] I was told that on October 7, 2017 data from all previous economic crashes will mirror current circumstances indicating that Europe will crash, followed by Japan. Until that time it will be a great time to invest. Buy silver and store it in a safe place as it rarely fluctuates much and is a pretty stable investment and will survive the crash. If this guy is right, buy bullets too!

[Captain Doom and Gloom] Wouldn’t it be nice to have our country go back to the ways and means of real working people? No welfare to support the unproductive, no hand-outs to the needy useless eaters, no taxes for ego projects, no Military Industrial Media Complex, no race or sex court battles, no invasions by walk-ins, and all the other great stuff We the People worked hard for, but got screwed over because of the bleeding heart sissies, do-gooders and religious power kooks!? A super crash just might wake up Americans to realize what they have lost and who is trying to make them bend over.
sunglasses look over rim wink

[Found Sunglasses] Did you lose a pair of sunglasses Sunday at Dolphin marina parking lot? Contact me with description and I’ll get them back to you. Hope you had a great day in or on the water.

In his youth Mohammed was loved and respected by his companions, who named him El Amin, the “Faithful One.” He was notable too for his good looks, for his bright dark eyes, clear brown skin, and for a curious black vein that swelled between his eyebrows when he was moved to anger. He had wide opportunities for thought and meditation, since, as was the case with most Arabs, his occupation was for years that of a shepherd on the hillsides of his native city. Eventually, at his uncle’s wish, he became camel-driver and conductor of the caravan of a certain rich widow named Kadija. The long journey to Syria was undertaken with success, and on his return the widow Kadija looked upon the young man of twenty-five with eyes of favor. She imagined she saw two angels shielding him with their wings from the scorching sunshine, and, taking this for an indication that he was under the special protection of Allah, sent her sister to him, according to a common custom of Arabia, to intimate her willingness to be his bride. So the poor camel-driver became the husband of the wealthy Kadija, and a very happy marriage it turned out to be. Six children came to gladden the peaceful home, of whom the youngest, Fatima, was to play a part in future history.
content-beach00

 

Summertime in the lower Keys. It doesn’t get any better than this!

Submit anything of a positive nature, unless it’s breakthrough stuff to island@bigpinekey.com

national politics an(Click here)