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Sunday May 15, 2011

RAPTURE COUNTDOWN: 6 DAYS LEFT.

[Marsh Rabbit Killing] A neighbor phoned today and told me that one of his two free-roaming cats killed a marsh rabbit and brought it home. He feels badly about it, but doesn't want to deal with his wife and daughter about the killing. The area is known as the Boss tract, bordered by Watson, Key Deer, Fern, and Iroquois.

He also mentioned that opossums and coons come up his stairs on a nightly basis to eat the cat food he leaves out.

Can you believe how stupid BPK people are?  Is there any hope of getting thru to these people about how they are harming our fragile environment?

Recap of Saturday’s CT:
Sloan is a genius.
People donate out-dated food they won’t eat themselves to the PO.
Natives are invasive.
Skol helps you sleep better.
Love or hate them feral cats.
Get high on whipped cream.
Pilot whales are getting a reprieve from God.
The AA basher was right.
The IKC is doing God’s will.
Wal-Mart shoppers all live on Big Pine Key.
Keeping your GF(?) happy comes at a price.
You can’t live where it’s too hot or too cold.
What the hell is “FOLT?”
Have sex 7 times a day to stay healthy.
You can drink your own urine.
Don’t marry an asshole.
Gas costs more in Norway.

[Reddi-Wip High]  I thought they removed the nitrous oxide form Reddi-Wip in the 1970s. In the hippy days we were always broke so for excitement we’d go to the supermarket and “do” all the Reddi-Wip cans in the refrigerated case. We never felt bad for the people buying Reddi-Wip for their strawberry shortcake who couldn’t get it out of the can after we’d inhaled all the nitrous oxide propellant.

[Bar Wisdom] My wife and her best friend, Sam, went to San Francisco to find us a new home. They have been looking for four years now. It must be a tough real estate place?

I dropped a tear in the ocean. The day you find it is the day I will stop missing you.

A salute to all that serve and protect. NRA Video. http://bit.ly/m5FwET

Expecting company soon? Quote Ben Franklin, "Fish and visitors smell in 3 days."

Pineapple growing in the Florida landscape. They used to grow pineapples on Big Pine Key a long time ago. http://bit.ly/5OuSiL

The reward for conformity was that everyone liked you except yourself.

That porno stash found in Osama's hovel needs to be carefully studied for hidden messages. Any volunteers?

New Key Largo Community Peace Park dedication on May 17^th at 6:30 p.m. Friendship Park MM 101.4 at Hibiscus Drive. Refreshments will be served & community leaders recognized.

In May 2010, a Student Peace Alliance member, Annabelle Bricker, proposed to the Monroe County Commission that a portion of each county park be designated a Community Peace Park. It passed unanimously and the students have been raising money to put bronze plaques embedded in coral rock at each park. Friendship Park is the fourth peace park to be dedicated: the others are at the Key Largo Community Park, Murray E. Nelson Government & Cultural Center, and Settlers park. Congratulations to this group. Well done. Bulletin Board

AA Basher is, indeed, sorely missed by me as well. Of course, I didn't have to do the editing.

[Sloan-sheep] I would like to address your post in a simple way:

"He is an eccentric genius." He is a cut-and-paster and nothing more. Nary an original thought has been expressed in his posts that did not come from someone else or some other source. Rumor, innuendo and gossip are his modus operandi.

"Everyone has the right to disagree, but not to insult or ridicule or pass judgment upon." And yet this is exactly what Sloan does, constantly and religiously.

"All the Prophets in the bible were ridiculed by their contemporaries." Sloan would have us believe he is a prophet in our times, but no, it is merely a delusion that you share with him, and that is what is really very frightening.

"Just because he has visions, doesn't mean that he's crazy or stupid." That you believe this is what may qualify you for those adjectives.

"On top of being a genius he's also a gentleman." Among all the examples I could give here, I will give one: he called a woman he disagreed with a 'Nazi Cow'. That does not sound like a gentleman in any shape or form of the word?

"You keep going strong Sloan. I support you." Sadly, I agree with this, you will indeed support him mindlessly. And this is why you are a Sloan-sheep. ~theravenspeaks@yahoo.com

In 2009 1.7 million camels were killed for food as were 52 billion chickens. I ate a lot of the chickens, but none of the camels.

[Repeat Offender Syndrome] Combined, Neal Butler (left) and Lonnie Helms have been arrested 146 times and spent 5,191 days in the Keys jail. Somebody needs to send the Navy Seals after these 2 guys.

Mayor: Designate panhandling zones. http://bit.ly/jWkLlh

[Bangladesh] If you were to take half the population of the entire United States and plop them in Utah and then submerge about half of them part of the year you would get the idea of what it’s like living in Bangladesh. India is building a 2500 mile concrete and barbed wire barrier along Bangladesh’s west border. It’s statically impossible to be alone in Bangladesh with it’s 164 million people in such a small area.

I just got off the phone with Jim Wilson-Garrison. He is alive and well; still warm and funny. He lives in the "House of Shalom" which is the house of peace. How perfect. He was happy to hear about the Southernmost Community Peace Park in Key West. He sends his love to his Big Pine Key friends.

[Genius] Why do people use the word genius to describe whacko people they can't figure out?

[The Rapture] Does anyone know what time the Rapture will be? I have a dentist appointment and would like to cancel it.

[Information Theory] This interesting new theory opines that ideas are being seen as behaving like organisms, replicating by leaping from brain to brain to brain, interacting to form new ideas and evolving in what scientist call a burstwise advance.

[Photos] Do you think there's any benefit to showing Bin Laden photos, other than making sure that the Halloween costumes are accurate?  ~Stephen Colbert

[Sloan] Today's homily is a reply to a pro-Sloan and two anti-Sloan comments on yesterday's CT. Here is the reply to the second anti-Sloan comment.

On my website I use 10 point type because it saves space. My eyesight is pretty weak, I can read 10 pt. with reading glasses. I didn’t know it was bothering others. I will try to use 12 pt. henceforth, although stuff I pull from other websites often screws up the formatting and font sizes in what I post.

I spend most of my waking hours in contemplation and “dowsing” the Spirit, which I have different ways of doing. Even when I’m writing, and even in my sleep, I am contemplating and dowsing the Spirit. Similar to praying unceasing, but a lot more wailing and gnashing of teeth. Don’t worry about Deer Ed’s stamina or tedious communications with argumentative people. He loves controversy on the CT, it increases the CT’s circulation. Many times has Ed gotten onto me when I talked about stopping writing and leaving this planet. Many times has he told me my work isn’t done, I am still needed around here. The only thing that bugs Ed, as far as I can tell, is people knowing his real name, where he lives, and him getting personally entangled in dramas on the CT. I know Ed’s real name and where he lives. I have been there many times, which I don’t imagine my critics on the CT can say of themselves. I know who FTR is, have attended an awards dinner with him and his wife and Deer ED, at Deer Ed’s invitation. Deer Ed gave FTR and me Letters of Marque for our contributions to the CT.

From Wikipedia: In the days of fighting sail, a Letter of Marque and Reprisal was a government license authorizing a private vessel (privateer) to attack and capture enemy vessels, and bring them before admiralty courts for condemnation and sale. Cruising for prizes with a Letter of Marque was considered an honorable calling combining patriotism and profit, in contrast to unlicensed piracy which was universally reviled.

You can see the whole trilogy by clicking on this link: The Fool of Little Torch

Whoever sent in the YouTube video of Walmartians, thank you. What a great laugh. I sent it to all my buddies. Keep them coming.

[Heathrow Airport] This is fascinating, but not recommended for those afraid of flying. YouTube - Heathrow Airport- London

Your iguana post Saturday was very good. Here's my contribution.

[Huffing Reddi-Wip] I had four kids in the car all the time and didn't know about huffing whipping cream. I didn't need it then.

[The Rapture] I’ve maxed out two of my credit cards and am working on the last one. I have so many new toys I’m as happy as Santa! My new boat is real fast and I don’t worry about the cost of gas because It’ll all be over in a few days. I’d rather die in debt then live without stuff.

[Free Weatherization] Will the clients of Social Services to receive weatherization through the Assistance Program at no cost, first be evaluated for upcoming home foreclosure’ or if they have a retirement fund nestled away or a $50,000 CD in the bank? Will that go against being approved for the program? Who and how are the participants evaluated -- if at all?

There is an incredibly fine line between genius and insanity.

[Roosters] Since we are on the topic of annoying wildlife, who do I call when the roosters crow all day and night and are becoming a pest?

PICTURE OF THE DAY
Send us your picture. Please include a brief explanation,
where and when it was taken and your name if you want. Picture From the Keys

I found these 32 eggs while shoveling mulch for my garden. Each egg was between 1 ½” to 1 ¾” long and had a shell that reminded me of cheap vinyl. I opened a couple of them but could not identify what they were. I suspect iguanas. Does anyone know who these eggs will be? I uncovered 32, the next day there were 28 and this morning there were only 22

Caution: NATIONAL POLITICS and Religion, etc

Criticizing George Carlin for being anti-religion and writing that his main reason for criticizing religion was “human ego” is simply foolish. Ego had nothing to do with his beliefs. The great men the writer cited would have done the same great things if they realized there was no god. Because someone believes in myths doesn’t make him great, his heart and actions make him great. Does everyone who believes in reality and makes fun of the faithful do it for ego?

How about saying that all those plastic TV ministers with their bazillion dollar glass cathedrals are doing it for ego.

I wonder who has more porn on his computer, Osama Bin Laden or the average US Congressman.

[Draft Dodging] If I had a kid possibly going to Vietnam, I would try everything possible to have gotten him a deferment. Now in retrospect, some of those Vietnam Vets probably wished they'd have gotten one also. I'd do the same as Trump did.

What's the plan for gun control? Who is the White House gun czar, gun policy adviser and assistant for justice and regulatory policy? It's Steve Croley who's been called a genius for regulatory law. He is cited on regulation and tort law. Croley's focus on law has shifted from the theoretical perspective of law to, now get this, the nuts and bolts of how things work!

So here's a guy who's dedicating his life to increasing governmental control over us, adding excessive, expensive regulatory and product safety policies to protect all us stupid bastards from ourselves. Got it? He's one of the high and mighty who knows far better than us common idiots. He's one of those experts who believe in spending millions of dollars by regulating us with safety stickers and booklets. Those red and yellow warnings labels that read: DANGER This product could cause personal injury or DEATH.

So what does this nuts and bolts genius for regulatory law and protector of us idiots do? in 2002 he stuck his hand in a running snow blower. It was reported, "Croley's reputation for pragmatism hit a snag in 2002 when his fingers were mangled in a snow-blower accident." He had disregarded the warning label and became an on-campus case study. If one of the country’s leading tort scholars fails to heed an advisory label, professors posited, do such warnings carry any weight, of course not. Anyone, including a genius for regulatory law who fails to respect machinery will get hurt or killed with or without a warning label. Save taxpayer money, dump the stickers. Given our kids educational slide to 3rd world country status, kids of the future won't be able to read anything anyway.

What do the White House and its gun czar have in mind for gun control? President Obama told Jim and Sarah Brady that gun control was very much on his agenda and “we are working on it".

What's certain is that strict gun control laws do not always have the effect that legislators intend. More guns (in the right hands) can stop crime, and fewer guns (in the wrong hands) can make for more crime. Gun control isn't crime control because 162,000 newly-illegal firearms were forked over to British officials by law-abiding citizens. This didn't decrease the amount of gun-related crime in the U.K. In fact gun-related crime has nearly doubled in the U.K. since the ban was enacted. Be careful about how far the calls for gun control go, because the idea that gun control laws lower gun crime is a myth.

Read the complete article and comments. http://wapo.st/eajvqZ

Sarah Palin possessed by Judy Tenuta. http://bit.ly/mme4uM

Our Border Patrol agents are dealing with some of the same bunch as our soldiers in the mid-east. http://bit.ly/lqsWZG

[Religious Rants] It sounds as if somebody's Mom made them go to church when they didn't want to go.

[The dogma of the Holy Trinity] I finally understand where the storyline came from for the wormhole aliens on Deep Space Nine.

[Torture] Waterboarding and other harsh interrogation techniques were not a factor in tracking down Osama bin Laden, a leading Republican senator insisted Thursday.

Sen. John McCain, who spent 5 1/2 years as a prisoner of war in North Vietnam, also rejected the argument that any form of torture is critical to U.S. success in the fight against terrorism.

In an impassioned speech on the Senate floor, the Arizona Republican said former Attorney General Michael Mukasey and others who back those tactics were wrong to claim that waterboarding al-Qaida's No. 3 leader, Khalid Sheikh Mohammed, provided information that led to bin Laden's compound in Pakistan. McCain spoke with an unrivaled record on the issue. He's the top Republican on the Senate Armed Services Committee, the 2008 GOP presidential nominee who consistently challenged the Bush administration and Vice President Dick Cheney on the use of torture and a man who endured brutal treatment during the Vietnam War. He also made many of his points in an opinion piece in The Washington Post.

McCain said he asked CIA Director Leon Panetta for the facts, and that the hunt for bin Laden did not begin with fresh information from Mohammed. In fact, the name of bin Laden's courier, Abu Ahmed al-Kuwaiti, came from a detainee held in another country. "Not only did the use of enhanced interrogation techniques on Khalid Sheikh Mohammed not provide us with key leads on bin Laden's courier, Abu Ahmed, it actually produced false and misleading information," McCain said. He called on Mukasey and others to correct their misstatements.

.

McCain said he opposes waterboarding, a technique that simulates drowning, and any form of torture tactics. He said that they could be used against Americans and that their use damages the nation's character and reputation. "I do not believe they are necessary to our success in our war against terrorists, as the advocates of these techniques claim they are," he said. "Ultimately, this is about morality. What is at stake here is the very idea of America — the America whose values have inspired the world and instilled in the hearts of its citizens the certainty that, no matter how hard we fight, no matter how dangerous our adversary, in the course of vanquishing our enemies we do not compromise our deepest values," he said. "We are America, and we hold ourselves to a higher standard. That is what is really at stake."

McCain's remarks drew immediate praise from several Democratic senators who have been at political odds with him in past campaigns.

"No one else in the Senate could have given this speech," said Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nev., "He speaks with personal knowledge. He still remembers the most dark nights when he tried to rest, when he was tortured brutally."

Sen. Dick Durbin, D-Ill., said McCain's opinions may not be the popular view, but they were the right ones. "Thank you for your leadership," Durbin said.

You can believe FTR on torture or a leading republican on the Senate Armed Forces Committee with direct knowledge. You decide.

[Karl Marx] If anyone from the Right ever read a book by Karl Marx, they probably skipped over most of it. Modern Communism has very little to do with Marx's Communism, other than the name. Dictators took Marx's basics and made up their own rules. Karl Marx would not have endorsed any of them. Please take the time to learn what your talking about before you do.

[Gas] Amid growing public unhappiness over gas prices, President Barack Obama is directing his administration to ramp up U.S. oil production by extending existing leases in the Gulf of Mexico and off Alaska's coast and holding more frequent lease sales in a federal petroleum reserve in Alaska. But the moves won't calm spiraling prices at the pump any time soon. Obama said Saturday that the measures "make good sense" and will help reduce U.S. consumption of imported oil in the long term. But he acknowledged anew that they won't help to immediately bring down gasoline prices topping $4 a gallon in many parts of the country, and an oil industry analyst agreed. "There is practically nothing that Washington can do that would materially change the price of fuel in this country," said Raymond James analyst Pavel Molchanov, noting that the United States produces about 5 percent of the world's petroleum while consuming about 20 percent. "Given that imbalance, there is simply no policy shift that could plausibly come from the federal government that can significantly change that dynamic."

An oil industry group praised Obama's move as a first step with a "couple of positive nuggets" but contended that more was needed to boost oil production. Erik Milito, upstream director for the American Petroleum Institute, called in a statement for more access to key shale reserves and construction of a pipeline that would import crude from Canadian oil sands.

Get ready for the expected response from the Right telling us how horrible this plan to increase oil expansion is. The oil industry praised the move but the anti Obama zealots will never admit he does anything right. Maybe they will try and credit Bush for this new opening. Would you really be surprised? I’m sure credit will come from Sarah Palin, wont it?

[Divided We Fall] The problem is that the American people are divided because of politicians, and more so, the media. There are a lot more lazy people with fewer morals then ever before. I think the reason is big government and greedy politicians which caused the younger generations to faultier. This started decades ago and is now hitting crisis. The more they support the lazy in order to keep them in power is killing this country. People have less work ethics and just want what the rich have without doing anything for it.

At the age of 48, I’ve work hard and smart all of my life, I acquired working papers at the age of twelve, never collected welfare, food stamps or unemployment. I believe in a higher being and in the morals that my parents taught me like God helps those who help themselves and all of the ten commandments, but there are so many that aren't on the same page as me. When I lived in VB running my company after risking everything I had my employees looked at me as rich and they should have a lot of it even though they had no risk. At the same time my wife worked for my business and volunteered most of her free time at the Methodist Church helping the poor and homeless. It's funny, I think if I did anything less my dad would kick my ass, although he isn't with us anymore.

I think we are going to get screwed as long as we have a large government. Bankruptcy is morally wrong in my book and Donald Trump is running for president. I have no respect for the Bankruptcy King or Barack Obama.

I think the USA is changing or has been changed; and we’re losing the pride of working hard for your share, and the give-me-miners overcome us we are screwed.

[From the Right] Special note to he who would be King: Deer Friend, you have truly noble ideas. Certainly that is one of the most important attributes of any ruler of note. We can see that your ideas are selfless, aimed only at improving the lot of your nation. That’s even more evidence of nascent nobility. Your ideas are fiscally sound and based on economic reality. Your ideas are Americana. We desperately need more Americana in these days of leaders who shun all that was and could be great in our nation but rather attempt to gut us of our national excellence. It may not be possible that you’re dream of Nobility can come to pass. But, in this great nation your thoughts most certainly can influence other members of our community, and most especially, our leaders. Deer Friend, don’t be silent, share your views and your dreams for our great nation with the Coconut Telegraph community. Speaking of views, the movie “Atlas Shrugged” from the Ayn Rand novel is now playing at the Tropic Cinema…It’s worth seeing.

(Part 2) We must wonder what is the impetus for the deep seated hate of all things religious that we sometimes read here. We must wonder what spurs some of the CT community to take the time and effort needed to make their postings. It’s fair to say that there seem to be only a few of these apparently tortured souls. Their bellicosity seems remarkably out of proportion to their numbers or their theme. None the less their shrill condemnation of all things religious and for those who hold religious beliefs is stunning, and in some respects worthy of concern. Such hate is irrational. Their anger is irrational and has the odor of fear about it. Can it be their own hearts that they fear? Our nation is a fascinating and functioning conglomeration of different political, cultural, and religious beliefs. That’s why it has worked so well for over two centuries. There are those of us who have a deep belief in a superior being but have no allegiance whatsoever towards anything that even resembles religion. And at the other end of the spectrum there are folks deeply religious in all things even politics. Only very rarely do you see members either camp proselytizing aggressively. It has been my personal experience that the religious proselytizing folks cease and desist after a quick “Thank you, but no thank you.” Even so, those folks nearly always talk of love, not the hate that our CT irreligious posters speak. The sad sacks who hold religion and the notion of any supreme being in such contempt seem to be filled to overflow with hate for any person who disagrees with their point of view. These folks don’t talk of love, comity, and trust; rather they very aggressively catechize disbelief, distrust, and hate. The CT posters who aggressively disparage all things religious are cut from the same cloth as the sick and cruel “religious” SOBs who assault the funerals of our soldiers fallen in battle with hateful signs and slogans that they claim to be the word of their God. Small numbers of small people, burdened with small hateful ideas, speaking in loud voices.

Sunday May 15, 2011

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(eD:  No edIT SatuRDAY!!!!!!......b-cuz u assd 4 iT!!!!!!!!!

[No-Edit Saturday] For those of you visiting for the first time, don’t judge the Coconut Telegraph by today’s un-edited episode. This is the Editor's almost day off. Tune in tomorrow for the edited version. You’ll find its format and graphics more pleasing. (Note to friends of the Editor: I can get out of here a lot sooner on Saturday if you don't send in any photos, attachments or Classified Ads for Saturday publication. That's because it takes a lot of time to resize and re-format them. Please email them to us by 6am on Sunday  for Sunday's publication. I'll appreciate it a lot.)

Saturday May 14, 2011

Where is the AA basher? Is she or he really been 86’d from the CT? I am one who reads the CT reverently and sifting through some of the nonsense has always amazed me. But, this alchie cannot understand why, a poster who made good sense about an issue that affects all of us, users or not, has been cut off because of some editorial malarkey. The basher obviously has had a lot of experience in the rooms of AA (or the car club has he so warmly refers to it). I too have had a bout or two with the “rooms” and 99.9% of the time I had to laugh because of the basher’s honesty. AA is a psychological war zone run by some very greedy and megalomaniacal control freaks. I have been sober for six years. I started in AA on my own volition and left it before my “90 and 90” could pull a Manchurian Bill W on me. Granted, I spent a bit of time in rehab before my entrance into AA and what I learned in rehab about myself and how to deal with life was slowly being stripped away in the “room”. I could not believe what I witnessed and heard. Drink the Kool-Aid is how I felt after 60 minutes of listening to a bunch of lonely, sexually frustrated, criminal, drug dealing, wife beating, sociopaths rant about how a book that was written by a piece of shit human being and a proctologist changed them into loving, human citizens. I read the book. They tell you to read the first 164 or so pages to get the “general idea” of how the “program” works. Then if you really have a lot of time to feel shitty about yourself, read some of the stories that fill the rest of the book. I read one. I just think there is something wrong with reading about someone else’s misery to make yourself feel better is a little to strange for a normal person. But wait - normal or “normies” as they are referred to by ruling class of AA (those people whose entire social life and conversations revolve around control of everyone in the rooms) so I did not fit in. Shit, these people form committees and cliques that literally push away anyone who will not see it their way and hence; resentment forms (according to AA, the biggest cause of using alcohol). I could continue for sentence and paragraph after paragraph but will halt. I wish the basher the best and I have always admired a person who is not afraid to speak the truth, especially when it comes to corrupt behavior. It is 2011, the rapture is not coming because you would have to believe in God, which according to AA is a higher power that can be anything that makes you feel good - my wireless mouse said it so it must be true. Unless my batteries die in it then the new batteries will be that power.

5321 which they may be entitled under this chapter.

Caution: NATIONAL POLITICS and Religion, etc

Christ, according to the faith, is the second person in the Trinity, the Father being the first and the Holy Ghost the third. Each of these persons is God. Christ is his own father and his own son. The Holy Ghost is neither father nor son, but both. The son was begotten by the father, but existed before he was begotten. Just the same before as after. So, it is declared that the Father is God, and the Son God, and the Holy Ghost God, and that these three Gods make one God. According to the celestial multiplication table, once one is three, and three times one is one, and according to heavenly subtraction, if we take two from three, three are left. The addition is equally peculiar, if we add two to one, we have but one. Nothing ever was, nothing ever can be more perfectly idiotic and absurd than the dogma of the Trinity.

Saturday May 14, 2011
 

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Friday May 13, 2011

RAPTURE COUNTDOWN: 8 DAYS LEFT

[Iguana Killing] "What makes the Keys so unique are the creatures that live here." Are you serious? Spoken like a true invasive specie. Where are you from? As a Florida native I've seen the decline of our state's environment over the last 50 years. Before A/C, and the tourism council this place pretty much took care of itself. Now with all the human invasives here, there's a real police presence to control the masses.

It's got to be the same with invasive reptiles and fish. Iguanas carry disease, they defecate everywhere, destroy seawalls with their nests and on and on. Iguanas were cute when they were kept in cages, so were lionfish when they were floating in fish tanks.

Wild iguanas eat bird eggs and flora; lionfish eat everything smaller than them.

 
I had a commercial fishing buddy tell me he's been stung twice by lionfish fins that poked thru his thick green gloves while he was lobstering.

It's time to open a new Keys restaurant chain (and not another tiki-sports bar, themed souvenir shop). There's an unlimited supply of protein walking the streets and swimming our shallows. FlaKeys Tacos, Iggy's Fish Tacos, Iggy Pops (the pop comes from the sound of my high-powered pellet rifle). Just a small roadside shack with a couple of fry-o-lators would work.

Iguana tail is eaten in many parts of the world and taste is like gator tail. The Bahamians have made a dent in the lionfish population by eating them. Here's a guy from REEF showing how to fillet one. http://bit.ly/kQ2EHp

If you want to know what happens when invasive or non-native species take over an area, just look upon our waters on any given weekend. Gone are the majority of the commercial fishermen and their boats, diving has gone from a thriving industry to being something tourists do. Just look around you people, the tanks the people carry into Winn-Dixie are O2, not SCUBA.

Our waters have been invaded by groups of great Whites (people, not sharks) The groups of shallow water/sand bar partiers who feel camaraderie by drinking for hours together and then pissing on each other (by proxy) as they relieve themselves into the water mid-sentence without batting an eye.

Ah yes, lets live and let live and enjoy what the invasives are doing to the Florida Keys.

[Iguana Killers] Very few people here on BPK seem to care about the lives of our creatures. There's the IKC whacko who occasionally posts his delusional ideation.  Others will kill an iguana because it eats a few flowers.  We solved that problem by planting more flowers, they can't get them all.  And then we have our very own USFWS office here who plans to use what resources we have left to destroy feral cats and other wildlife, including opossums, snakes, iguanas, and in time, raccoons again.   

The sad truth is that USFWS has been caught falsifying data about endangered species--and have admitted it.  I mean if they're making such a big issue about sea level rise, then we're talking about sea water wiping out marsh rabbit habitat.  Why aren't steps being taken to save the rabbit, especially since there's lots of other room here in the Keys where they can thrive above sea level and without predators?  Instead, thousands of dollars will be spent to trap and kill cats and other wildlife when other options are available.  

People down here, supposedly so laid back, are kill-happy.  It's like if the lives of these other creatures are an inconvenience, then they need to be exterminated.  And one of the saddest things of all (sadistic as well) is that these lives will be taken for our convenience based on our flawed research even though they will eventually repopulate.  There are alternatives without letting the USFWS run roughshod over us.  The IKC ought to be ashamed!

[Big Pine Militia] Great, a bunch of immature morons running around the woods holding guns, just what we need. Hopefully, it will just quickly devolve into a weekend drinking club, like every other organization on this island.

Found male dog on Stock Island, looks like an expensive pure bred. Call and ID your dog. If no one claims him we will keep him. Call Ger 321-298-7088. Classified Ads > Lost & Found

Where’s the rain? I know, I'll wash my car. That always works!

After all my heartfelt outpourings, I come to find out that it was only a scam to get more money from me.

Ashton Kutcher appears to be taking the reins from Charlie Sheen on CBS’ hit show “Two and a Half Men,” according to the Hollywood Reporter.

The actor, who is married to actress Demi Moore and got his start in showbiz on “That 70’s Show,” reportedly is finishing up a deal to join the cast, sources tell The Hollywood Reporter. A source says Kutcher is getting a “huge payday,” according to the paper.

The news comes just one day after Hugh Grant reportedly ended discussions about joining the show, citing creative differences. Other Hollywood stars like Rob Lowe, John Stamos and Jeremy Piven were also reportedly considered to assume the lead role.

Sheen was fired from “Men” in March after a series of booze-benders and tirades against CBS executives and Chuck Lorre, the show’s creator.

Certainly George Carlin was entitled to his view of religion, just like any other dead, left-wing, drug-addled hypocrite. And I'm sure the message played well with the type of person who found him thoughtful and amusing and would pay to hear his anger-fuelled rants. It’s easy to tell a paying audience what it wants to hear. I wonder though, if dear departed George, had he ever had the opportunity, would have told Martin Luther King, Mother Teresa, Jesus and Moses that all religion is bullshit. That the very essence of their lives and good deeds were part and parcel of some foolish fairy tale. Just because the Great Carlin had no conception of life outside of his selfish, human ego?

The next meeting of the Big Pine computer club is coming up this Saturday, May 14, 10 am at the senior center. We hope to see you there. Bulletin Board

Only dead fish swim with the stream.

Karl Marx was a great thinker. If his critics were great thinkers, they would read his words and not what caused him to write them or their effect on politics. Read what he wrote not its effect.

Will Rogers, who died in a 1935 plane crash, was one of the greatest political sages this country has ever known.

1. Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.

2. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

3. There are two theories to arguing with a woman. Neither works.

4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

5. Always drink upstream from the herd.

6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it back into your pocket.

8. There are three kinds of men:

The ones that learn by reading.

The few who learn by observation.

The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence and find out for themselves.

9. Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

10. If you're riding' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then to make sure it's still there.

11. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back.

12. After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him. The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

You have enemies? Good! That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life.  ~Winston Churchill

The iguana lover Thursday theorized that if you kill iguanas and your neighbor is also a nuisance you‘ll want to kill him too. And the iguana lover calls us “sickos”!

[Pension Reform (Passed)] Employees in the Florida Retirement System will pay 3 percent of their salaries into their retirement accounts.

Mr Gastesi, Please advise me who will actually pay this 3% contribution? The employee, or will it be passed back to the taxpayers in the next budget? Or are you going to use this 3% as a reason to request salary increases in this coming budget? Please spare us taxpayers your misstatements like when you say at the BOCC meetings that employees have not had raises in a few years because that is not true.

Based on county payroll records for ’08, ‘09 and ‘10, lots of employees had salary increases, some more than one. Most notably, your new assistant Kevin Wilson got $22,000 increase last year. That was because he had to make more money than Liz Wood, because he's now in charge of supervising her. Imagine how that much money could have been spread over little increases to more employees.

Life is what we make it. Always has been. Always will be.  ~Grandma Moses

[Men Walk on the Left] By having the man walk to the left of the woman it made it easier to draw his sword or dagger to defend against scallywags, thieves and the like. It also came in handy to defend her honor.

As far as cantilevered houses built over the streets, they were built that way to get more living space, and avoid taxes. Houses were taxed based on their width at street level.

Following straight lines shortens distances, and also life. Don't go straight, go forward!

[Key West Brewery] Key West's closed Waterfront Market is closer to becoming Waterfront Brewery. http://bit.ly/lHJvKN

Monroe County Extension Service Calendar for May. http://bit.ly/eHqeDX

[Karl Marx] The BBC, that great bastion of progressive thought, has pronounced Karl Marx the thinker of the millennium. Surprise, surprise. I, on the other hand, would put much more stock in what the great British writer Paul Johnson said about Marx, and I quote: "Marx never set foot in a mill, factory, mine, or other industrial workplace in the whole of his life." His war against free enterprise stemmed not from solidarity with the workers but from his constant debts, unemployment, and inability to support his family. His mother complained, "Karl should accumulate capital instead of just writing about it".

[The Rapture] Will there still be power failures after the rapture? beep ... beep ...  beep ...

Iguanas, chickens, feral cats, peacocks are cute to look at, but they all have issues which make living along side of them a nuisance.  As you know, iguanas defecate everywhere and eat our flowering plants. Roosters crow all damn day and night long. Feral cats meow and rip up garbage. Peacocks squawk at all hours and dig through gardens.

Perhaps this poster does not have any property that will be defecated upon, or garden dug up or eaten or garbage that'll be ripped apart or doesn't mind the annoying crowing, but the majority of the Big Pine population does mind.

[Sloan] I awoke this morning with the angels’ view of my leaving the Coconut Telegraph: No dice, I have a soul covenant with Mother Nature and Big Pine and No Name Keys to do all I can to protect them. The Coconut Telegraph helps me honor that covenenant. I already knew the angels’ answer when I turned in last night, but I thought it was because the Coconut Telegraph has so many more readers than I have on my websites. I was complaining what ever happened to: “You cannot worship God and mammon?” Whatever happened to, “First, to thine own self be true?” What ever happened to “free will”? I had forgotten all about the soul covenant. I keep telling people I do what I’m told by the angels, and here’s yet another example for nobody to believe. John Bartus belongs to a great horde, including a host of Sloan-detractor disciples living on Big Pine and No Name Keys, who don’t believe the angels put me up to the vile, vulgar and sophomoric shit I post. They are really going to be surprised when their eyes and ears finally are opened.

You can see today's entire inharmonic, convergence by clicking on this link: Nazi uprising & the cost of discipleship. The first half is about John Bartus' rapture in Luftwaffe heaven after he read the Mother's Day post.

Record Mississippi flooding threatens oil refineries and gas wells. http://bit.ly/jTIVvu

In spite of the cost of living, it's still very popular.

[Arrested] Two Big Pine Key residents, Jamie Liam Bernard, 28,  and Francesca Elise Fleming,  22, were arrested on felony child neglect charges Wednesday  after a deputy stopped a car  with two young children inside  while the driver allegedly was using whipped cream cans to get high. 

[Judging Others] “You are not a true Christian” I am sure you will get a few folks helping you with your bible studies about judging others.

In the Sermon on the Mount Jesus actually had a lot more to say about judging others than just one sentence. Here is the verse in context of the other things Jesus said about judging others:

"Do not judge so that you will not be judged. "For in the way you judge, you will be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you. "Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? "Or how can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of your eye,' and behold, the log is in your own eye? "You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye.

5 common things that turn on the Check Engine light. The most expensive cars to repair are hybrids. http://bit.ly/m7co8w

[Short term rental ban] If you go on any vacation rental web site such as VRBO you can see just how effective the short term rental ban really is. The legal rentals in properly zoned neighborhoods are out numbered by the illegal ones. I am whining because I spent the money to purchase a legally zoned home to rent out and could not compete with the illegal ones who are not charging the 12.5% sales tax and are almost always cheaper than the legal ones who have to go through the lengthy hoops to get and stay licensed.

PICTURE OF THE DAY
Send us your picture. Please include a brief explanation,
where and when it was taken and your name if you want. Picture From the Keys

The entrance to Big Pine Key from the east before they built the black deer fences.

Caution: NATIONAL POLITICS and Religion, etc

[Mexico rejects U.S. Backed Drug War]  In 2007, the U.S. Government's Merida Initiative, implemented by George W. Bush, funneled more than $1.5 billion into Mexico's drug war. President Obama has extended the original 3- year plan indefinitely. Let's end all the wars now and heal America. http://bit.ly/lF7s6W

[Secretary Napolitano on the recent deaths of Border Patrol agents] "It is with great sadness that I learned this morning that U.S. Customs and Border Protection Border Patrol Agents Eduardo Rojas, Jr., and Hector Clark were killed earlier today in an accident near Gila Bend, Ariz. The agents were based out of CBP's Yuma Sector and were on duty at the time of the accident. We are working closely with the Arizona Department of Public Safety and other agencies to determine the cause of the accident.

The entire DHS family expresses our deepest sympathies to the family and friends of these agents. We also keep in our thoughts and prayers all of those who put their lives at risk every day, at home and abroad, to defend our country. We honor their service and pray for their continued safety.”

[Cost of Making Money] I think we should follow the implication made by the poster on the House’s Republican Budget and not make any cuts at all, especially to seniors. The only trouble with that is that the printing presses have a very difficult time churning out enough dollars. Maybe they should just start putting more zeros after the numbers, at least we could save on the cost of paper that way.

[Obama Against Torture] On April 16, 2009, President Obama ordered the release of four Justice Department memos that described in detail the techniques used to interrogate KSM and other high-value terrorists. This time, not just Hayden (who was now retired) but five CIA directors -including Obama's own director, Leon Panetta -- objected. George Tenet called to urge against the memos' release. So did Porter Goss. So did John Deutch. Hayden says: "You had CIA directors in a continuous unbroken stream to 1995 calling saying, 'Don't do this.'" In addition to objections from the men who led the agency for a collective 14 years, the President also heard objections from the agency's covert field operatives. A few weeks earlier, Panetta had arranged for the eight top officials of the Clandestine Service to meet with the President. It was highly unusual for these clandestine officers to visit the Oval Office, and they used the opportunity to warn the President that releasing the memos would put agency operatives at risk. The President reportedly listened respectfully-and then ignored their advice.

We should leave Afghanistan immediately. By now I'm sure Karzai has salted away as many billions of our aid dollars in Switzerland as he and his family can ever spend and to used the rest to arm the Afghan army so they can shoot our guys in the back.

The White House Resolute Desk unlocks a mystery. Video

[Help Big Oil] While enjoying record profits and the highest prices per barrel, big oil says anyone who wants to remove their billions of dollar subsidies is un-American.

It’s great to see The Donald finally get down to the real issues facing this country. Donald Trump is coming clean on one of the more enduring follicular mysteries of the modern age: his hair. In an interview the real estate tycoon-turned-reality star, who is considering a 2012 presidential run, offered a lengthy explanation for how exactly it is that his hair comes to look the way it does everyday.

"OK, what I do is, wash it with Head and Shoulders. I don't dry it, though. I let it dry by itself. It takes about an hour," Trump said matter-of-factly.

In the meantime, he reads the papers and watches TV, counting Fox News and "Morning Joe," among his favorites. "I then comb my hair. Yes, I use a comb," Trump explained. "Do I comb it forward? No, I don't comb it forward." Pushing the "flying wing of his hair back," Hedegaard wrote, the reality star revealed his hairline, which has been the subject of speculation for years. "I actually don't have a bad hairline," he declared. "When you think about it, it's not bad. I mean, I get a lot of credit for comb-overs. But it's not really a comb-over. It's sort of a little bit forward and back. I've combed it the same way for years. Same thing, every time."

I imagine he then went on to say he’s amazed at the wonderful way he developed the style and is very proud of himself. I wonder if the Tea party gave him his usual standing ovation.

[From the Right] The crowing that you heard yesterday about an AP poll that alleged that Mr. Obama’s approval rating had reached 60% in the wake of the killing of Bin Laden was just plain inane. That posting reflects very badly on the quality of the thinking coming from the left leaner’s on the Coconut tree Telegraph. Its crystal clear that the poster desperately wants some good news in the current desert of good news and public opinion about Mr. Obama. So, when team O began to publicize the AP poll our left leaner pal grabbed it and slobbered wet kisses all over it. That was not the best idea. First of all, the poll is deeply and fundamentally flawed. If you will examine the internals of the poll you will find that AP, for some mysterious reason, decided to grotesquely “weight’ the pool of interviewees. They purposefully chose to use twice the number of Democrats over Republicans. Polling 101 students should know better. One must be nearly hopelessly dense to be fooled by that, and yet some CT fans were. Then AP purposefully chose not to interview likely voters and limited the number of interviewees to 1001 “adults”. It is very much worth noting that during the same time period, many other polls on the same basic topic had very different results. Real Clear Politics averaged the polls taken during the same period and found that the lowest polling approval rating of Mr. Obama’s performance was 47%, the highest (AP GFK) was a whopping 13 points higher. It is really significant that the average was only 51.7%. Of all those polls, only Rasmussen polls only likely voters. Right now AP is all tingly about the idea of getting their hot hands on the Bin Laden photos. If they could score an early copy of the pics they would be in 7^th heaven surrounded by virgins. Am I being too cynical when I suggest that the news “organs” (pardon the pun) which has the best (ahem) relations with Team Obama will be the first get the goodies? The bottom line is that Mr. Obama did enjoy a tiny bump up by killing Bin Laden, but it has already disappeared.

Friday May 13, 2011
 

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Thursday May 12, 2011

 
RAPTURE COUNTDOWN: 9 DAYS LEFT

[Sewer fees imminent for Lower Keys residents] Residents living within the boundaries of Monroe County's Cudjoe Key regional sewer system could begin paying for the estimated $156 million project as soon as October -- years in advance of the system being in the ground, let alone operational. http://bit.ly/lC5Fud

[The Rapture] This is what I'm going to do for The Rapture. I'm going to get wasted for these next nine days. Then I'm going to go to all the bars here in the Keys and pickup any female I can (regardless if she has teeth or not), and I'm going to fornicate all the time. Do everything I was afraid to do, and commit every sin I can think of. Then, (this is what the bible says) on the day before the Rapture, I will ask God to forgive me for my sins and accept Jesus as my savior. Hallelujah baby, the easy way out!

[Open-minded] "It be possible to be so open-minded that one's brain falls out." I think I read that in a fortune cookie. It also applies, pretty well, to a lot of progressives.

[Don’t Ask Don’t Tell] Rick Scott was elected to create jobs, but he and his fellow republicans are doing everything but that. The only thing they are really doing is working on a right-wing and big business agenda. Take for example the following bill which I bet nobody here has even heard about.

Florida is likely to become the first state in the country to approve a law that will bar doctors from asking parents and other patients if they have guns in their homes. The “Don’t Ask” bill has been approved by the Florida Legislature and the state’s Republican governor, Rick Scott, will now sign it.

Scott is a supporter of gun rights. The new bill named House Bill 155 would bar a physician or other health care professionals from asking patients or members of their families that they have a firearm in their home. The National Rifle Association is one of the supporters of the bill. The association says they want to stop doctors from invading their privacy. The association expressed concerned that the insurance companies could use the information against them. “Simply, it’s none of their business,” Marion Hammer, executive director of United Sportsmen of Florida, told the News Service of Florida earlier this year.

Meanwhile, the opponents of the bill argue that the doctors should be allowed to ask questions about guns to make sure they are stored properly. “We feel that physicians will be reluctant to ask about guns in the home as a result of this legislation. As a result we expect that, unfortunately, there will be an increase in injury and death of children and adolescents due to improperly stored guns,” Dr. Louis St. Petery, a pediatrician in Tallahassee, told MyHealthNewsDaily. The bill however, has an exception, which will allow doctors to ask about guns if the information “is relevant to the patient’s medical care or safety, or the safety of others.”

[Time is short The Rapture is coming] No worries, if the place blows there's not a dang thing any of us can do about it. Carry on.

[The chamber pot would wet everybody] When the warning call sounded (“look out below”, or whatever) pedestrians would hug the wall to avoid the worst of the splash. Most well-intentioned emptiers-of-pots would aim for the street, at least trying not to dump on the people close to the buildings. Gents would try to cover their ladies as best they could, that would mean being on the outer, street-side of the walkway.

Rental development being built on County land. http://bit.ly/mfEdzn

[The Rapture] I figure since we're not to know when it's going to happen all these predictors of doom are actually keeping it from happening. Thanks, guys!

[FL Keys Militia] There will be a new paramilitary group established on Big Pine Key. The Big Pine Militia is being organized by retired military personnel. More will follow in the coming days. Our standard operating procedure is being written at this time.

[Spraying for mosquitoes] Public safety vs collateral damage. http://bit.ly/jxZSSB

[Fair] Life isn’t fair. If it was we'd all look like models in the magazines without having to diet and workout. No amount of rule-making is going to level the playing field that is Life. You have to do the best you can with what you have.

Someone stole a jack hammer from the Dog Park's construction site, F&W Fence Company is donating time and materials for this project and during plain daylight someone walked in there while they were at lunch and walked away with the jack hammer. Please return their jackhammer to Watson Field, no questions asked. Call us and we will pick it up, no questions asked. 305-849-1270.

[Animal Shelter] The Middle & Lower Keys should have an animal shelter in place within days. http://bit.ly/lg2mCN

[Emptying the Chamber Pot] Second storeys were cantilevered over the sidewalk so when the chamber pot was emptied it would often land, or at least splash, on the gentleman walking to the woman’s left. That is why man traditionally walk on a lady’s left.

It looks like apple juice, but will light your torch.

I'm planning to take a trip by myself. Are there any destinations that are especially appealing for solo travelers? http://bit.ly/m3bVut

[Iguana Killing] I am so sick and tired of people wanting to eradicate iguanas, chickens, feral cats, peacocks and anything else these sickos want to take a shot at. Why? Leave them alone! Enjoy the beauty of the Keys, and stop trying to kill off everything. What makes the Keys so unique are the creatures that live here. As far as I'm concerned, humans are the aberrancy here, not the critters. People with guns who take pot shots at anything they consider a nuisance should be banished to a place where there is nothing else but them; maybe to a rock, with no life on it. I am so sick of folks who think it is their god given right to destroy the wildlife here. Don't tell me the iguana eat all their plants, either. What if your neighbor is a nuisance to you? Are you going to shoot them too? Call me what you want, I don't really care what people think. Animals (all kinds) are the true innocents on this planet. They hold no malice, they don't lie, manipulate, or do any of the things that humans are capable of. And to find humor in the killing of these creatures is just really, really sick. You find all these creatures a menace? Your kind is the menace. You have no heart. And you don't belong here. I don't care if you were born and raised here.

As Chief Seattle said, "The earth does not belong to us; we belong to the earth."

[The Rapture] Harold Camping lets out a hearty chuckle when he considers the people who believe the world will end in 2012.

"That date has not one stitch of biblical authority," Camping says from the Oakland office where he runs Family Radio, an evangelical station that reaches listeners around the world. "It's like a fairy tale."

The real date for the end of times, he says, is in 2011.

The Mayans and the recent Hollywood movie "2012" have put the apocalypse in the popular mind this year, but Camping has been at this business for a long time. And while Armageddon is pop science or big-screen entertainment to many, Camping has followers from the Bay Area to China.

Camping, 88, has scrutinized the Bible for almost 70 years and says he has developed a mathematical system to interpret prophecies hidden within the Good Book. One night a few years ago, Camping, a civil engineer by trade, crunched the numbers and was stunned at what he'd found: The world will end May 21, 2011!

This is not the first time Camping has made a bold prediction about Judgment Day. On Sept. 6, 1994, dozens of Camping's believers gathered inside Alameda's Veterans Memorial Building to await the return of Christ, an event Camping had promised for two years. Followers dressed children in their Sunday best and held Bibles open-faced toward heaven. But the world did not end. Camping allowed that he may have made a mathematical error. He spent the next decade running new calculations, as well as overseeing a media company that has grown significantly in size and reach.

"We are now translated into 48 languages and have been transmitting into China on an AM station without getting jammed once," Camping said. "How can that happen without God's mercy?"

His office is flanked by satellite dishes in the parking lot that transmit his talk show, "Open Forum." In the Bay Area, he's heard on 610 AM, KEAR. Camping says his company owns about 55 stations in the United States alone, and that his message arrives on every continent.

As for me, I will watch another sunset, enjoy a cool one or two, hug my beautiful wife of 41 years as I do every day and thank God for my good life in America. Then, I'll do it again tomorrow after this ridiculous false doo-doo from another idiot searching for his 15 minutes of fame has passed.

[A Gentleman] For us less older timers, the gentleman walks on the lady's left, protecting the lady from any street splash by vehicles, be it mud or water. In our current time, he protects from erratic drivers on the street also.

Baby boomer breakups and the search for a perfect union. http://bit.ly/kfxljW

[Nigerian General] I wonder what happened to all those nice people in Benin who were going to send me all of those millions of dollars. Of course I told them that they could take their various fees (user fees, administrative fees, handling fees, etc.) out of the approximate 64.85 billion dollars that they were so thoughtfully safeguarding for me. I guess that they’re plenty busy taking care of the other folks who responded before I did. I would say thank you to them, but they won’t answer my e-mails or my phone calls. Perhaps I should just have more patience, and quit questioning this wonderful blessing. And all it ended up costing me was about $745. Wow, I made out like a bandit, didn’t I? Damn, I wish they’d hurry up and send me my money.

[Sloan] Today's foreign and domestic affairs serving delves into politically incorrect and politically suicidal historical nooks and crannies of President Obama and our school district. Included is a YouTube of the Obama-McCain debate on what to do about Osama bin Laden, in which Obama is full-bore hawk and McCain is full-bore, well, you might have thought McCain was a Democrat and Obama was a Republican, if you didn't know better. Also included in today's fare are emails to me from School Board member Andy Griffiths, who downloaded stuff I don't suppose will make everyone who reads it entirely thrilled. Andy tells how some of the schools in Key West came to be, and how segregation still seems to be alive and well there. Quite interesting history and perspective, darn courageous of Andy to share it knowing I probably would publish it. You can see it all by clicking on this link: history lessons, foreign affairs & school district. Or you can bypass it and read whatever Raven and his disciples might have to offer today.

Bug Nursery.  A weapon in the war on exotic plants. http://bit.ly/jC4kxF

[The Rapture] I've tried to warn my friends and family and loved ones about May 21. They think I'm crazy and that saddens me. It's very hard. I worry, but I guess more recently, I'm just really looking forward to it. Now I do my witnessing without my wife and children. They don't believe as I do. God asks, "Do you love husband or wife over me? Do you love son or daughter over me?" It's a test. It's a fiery trial here that I'm going through. I feel as if I'm on a roller coaster. What if I'm raptured but my family is left behind? I'm crying over my loved ones one minute and elated the next. I'm all over the place! Everyone comments on my Facebook that I'm crazy. It's hard to deal with that. But, to be Elect is a very, very blessed thing.

[Email Scams] I'll see your Nigerian Prince, and raise you one Asian business man.

Hello Friend,
I have a sensitive, confidential brief from Hong Kong and I am asking for your partnership in re- profiling funds ($15,557,210.00 USD). What I require from you is your honest co-operation and I guarantee that this will be executed under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you and I from any breach of the law. All confirmable documents to back up this fund shall be made available to you, as soon as I receive your reply I shall let you know what is required of you.

Strawberry recipes. http://bit.ly/ivlolH

Dengue Fever workshop in Key West May 17^th.

Contemplation often makes life miserable. We should act more, think less, and stop watching ourselves live.

All know the way; few actually walk it.

PICTURE OF THE DAY
Send us your picture. Please include a brief explanation,
where and when it was taken and your name if you want. Picture From the Keys

Tool booth at Card Sound Bridge. It would be nice to have a toll booth at the entrance to the 18 mile stretch too in order to pay for our sewers.

Caution: NATIONAL POLITICS and Religion, etc

[Obama Popular Again] The Associated Press just released its new poll. President Obama's approval rating is at an all time high, 60%. 73% said that they believed that he would keep us safe from terrorism and 52% felt that he was following the right course in fixing our economy, despite the high unemployment rate. The American public is smart. They see through Republican hypocrisy, which will do absolutely anything to see that our President doesn't get another term. That is their mission. Watching them flip-flop through the issues is funny, yet sad. Those who voted in favor of getting rid of Medicare, as we know it, have now all changed their minds. Guess they realized pretty quickly that if they want to keep their jobs, they better represent the opinions of those who elected them.

Republicans vote the way they are told to. If they are told to vote yes, everyone votes yes. If they are told to vote no, everyone votes no. Take FTR, as an example, I have never read where he disagreed with the Republican party on anything. After taking out Bin Laden, he praised Obama, just as both parties did. I guess he felt that it was acceptable to do that. Has he ever disagreed with the Republican Party or the Tea Party? He is so brain-washed from watching 24 hour FOX News, he can't see any other opinion or solution?

[Wikileaks] Julian Assange awarded Australian Peace Prize. http://bit.ly/iSLalT

[Obamacare First Benefit] Aetna is requesting an average decrease of 10 percent on health plans sold to thousands of individuals. The health insurer is asking to revise rates because it has seen lower-than-expected expenses from medical claims. Aetna, like other health insurers, also must comply for the first time this year with rules in federal healthcare reform that require minimum levels of spending on health care. Health insurers must spend at least 80 cents on medical expenses for every premium dollar they collect for individuals and small businesses. For large-group health plans, insurers must spend 85 cents of every dollar.

[Reverse Robin Hood] The Republicans have adapted a sort of reverse tale of Robin Hood and his band of thieves. In their verson they take from the poor and give to the rich. They say it’s their money and they can take it back if they want because they are stronger than the poor.

Progressive, in political terms, is nothing more than liberal double speak. It means to take the country in the opposite direction than the US Constitution outlines. The progressives use nothing more than slogans, smoke and mirrors, (well they also use outright lies, but that's a whole different story) to further their ill-conceived concepts.

[Karl Rove vs Marx] It was a curious response to my post quoting Karl Marx and arguing that Republican policies are anti-union and anti-working people. One response said, "Read some books." I have. The second said, "Get out of my country." Neither gave a valid counter-argument to the idea that working people who vote for Republicans are voting against their own economic interest.

The amazing thing is that Marx, a German, wrote those words about the wealthy capitalists exploiting the workers in 1848. For the two followers of Karl Rove who filed the inane responses, they might be interested in knowing that people who read books consider Karl Marx one of the most influential figures in human history and in a worldwide 1999 poll by the BBC he was voted "thinker of the millennium." But I'm sure that wouldn't matter to people who spend their days picking up ideas from Rush Limbaugh.

[Crappy Soldiers] I am talking about the ANF, the Afghan National Army. They should not be allowed in the operational areas of our allies. They are the eyes and ears of the Taliban. In the Vietnam War all the Vietnamese civilian employees on US bases were the eyes and ears of the Viet Cong. Now the same mistakes are being made in Afghanistan. It has been said from many quarters that the Afghan hierarchy, including high ranking officers are a bunch of corrupt opium dealing sonofabitches. On top of that, they are Muslims. The Allies

should start another Phoenix program and terminate with extreme prejudice all those people that are suspect. This is war, the object of war, is to win. Anyone or anything that stands in the way of Victory should perish.

The House Republican budget would leave up to 44 million more low-income people uninsured as the federal government cuts states' Medicaid funding by about one-third over the next 10 years, nonpartisan groups said in a report issued Tuesday.

The analysis by the Kaiser Family Foundation and the Urban Institute concluded that Medicaid's role as the nation's safety net health care program would be "significantly compromised ... with no obvious alternative to take its place," if the GOP budget is adopted.

The plan passed by House Republicans last month on a party-line vote calls for sweeping health care changes, potentially even more significant than President Barack Obama's insurance overhaul. So far, most of the attention has gone to the Republican proposal to convert Medicare into a voucher-like system for future retirees. But Medicaid would also be transformed. Medicaid is a federal-state partnership that now covers more than 60 million low-income children and parents, seniors, including most nursing home residents, and disabled people of any age. Under the GOP plan, Medicaid would be converted from an open-ended program in which the federal government pays about 60 percent of the cost of services, into a block grant that would give each state a fixed sum of money.

The budget would also do away with the right to Medicaid benefits under federal law, and repeal a coverage expansion to low-income adults included in Obama's health care law.

Republican governors say they can save taxpayers billions through a block grant that would let them clear away federal red tape and design health care systems tailored to local needs. But the study cast doubt on whether governors would have enough money coming in from Washington to adequately meet the needs of their states and avoid sharp cuts in services.

Under current laws, Medicaid is expected to cover 76 million people in 2021, the end of the ten-year estimating window used in federal budgeting. Of those, some 17 million would gain coverage under Obama's expansion. The study estimated that 31 million to 44 million people would lose coverage from the combined impact of the block grant and repealing Obama's law. Researchers said they gave a range to account for different approaches that states might take to reduce their Medicaid rolls. Under the worst case, Medicaid enrollment would plunge by nearly 60 percent from current projected levels.

The study found that federal spending for Medicaid would decline by $1.4 trillion from 2012-2021, a reduction of about one-third from what is now budgeted. Southern and mountain states would face the steepest cuts. Florida, for example, would take a 44 percent hit, while Nevada would get a 41 percent reduction. Hospitals, community health centers and other health care providers that serve low-income people would be disproportionately affected. In 2021 hospitals would face Medicaid funding cuts of $84 billion, the study said, at a time when growing numbers of uninsured people would be going to emergency rooms for treatment.

Great plan Tea bag swingers, cut the most from the states that have the most senior citizens.

[George on Religion] George Carlin, philosopher, educator, comedian, and patriot, was born on this date in 1937. He was arrested for disorderly conduct in Milwaukee in 1972 for performing Seven Dirty Words You Can't Say on Radio or Television. Carlin was the first host of Saturday Night Live in 1975. "If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone else. I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death. This experiment, this magnificent experiment in democracy is just being shredded to pieces by these right-wing Christians. Republicanism is just shredding the rest of the Bill of Rights which hadn't been shredded already.” Carlin inspired the Emperor Has No Clothes Award, honoring public figures who tell it like it is about religion. Religion Is Bullshit! http://bit.ly/cBDsd8

[From the Right] Team Obama has floated a draft exec order that proposes to require that all contractors wanting to do business with the Feds list all their political contributions when they bid on federal contracts. This is pure Chicago political intimidation specifically designed to solicit donations to the Democrats and to tamp down donations to the Republican Party. Simply put it says: “Mr. Business man, you must think seriously about how important it is for you to donate to the party in power if you want to do business with the party in power.” Bear in mind that proposed Executive Order does not apply to recipients of federal grants, nor will it apply to unions. It goes without saying that grant recipients and Unions are largely beneficiaries of Democrat largess with your tax dollars. One does not have to be a political poo bah to realize that imposition of this order will give enormous leverage to the party in power. This is also a stark admission by Team Obama that the Obama admin and its initiatives are in dire trouble. Were it not, they never would have thought about attempting such outrageous, naked, abuse. The nasty truth is out; Mr. Obama is consumed with keeping his political power, he is in full retaliation mode against all he considers to be his “enemy”. Obama makes Nixon look like the voice of comity and reason. You can be rock certain that an “enemies list” will surface soon.

Part 2) Consider Texas. Since the first of the year, Texas has been wracked by drought that is the worst in a century. Recently two firefighters have died battling wildfires, there have been 7000+ separate fires that have devastated 2.2 million acres and 400+ homes have been destroyed. But, Republican Governor Rick Perry is a staunch and vocal critic of Obama, and Texas is a Republican redoubt. Perry asked Mr. Obama to declare Texas to be a disaster area so that certain Federal assistance programs could be accessed. Perry asked for help for his state. At first Texas did receive minimal Federal assistance. But the “Disaster Area” designation was denied. Then his requests for major help were first delayed, then denied. The Team Obama also denied pleas for assistance by Senators Cronyn and Hutichson. The Feds said that they had helped with about 20 fires and that was “enough”. The FEMA big shot said: "FEMA has been in close contact with the state since the fires occurred and, based on the information they provided, it was determined that there was not a need for additional support at this time," It is obvious that states rich in Democrat voters get disaster help, Republican states don’t. No help for Texas, but Billions for Pakistan. Just for the record: On May 1^st, the day that Mr. Bin Laden went to his maker, Rasmussen’s polling of likely voters revealed that 50% of them approved of Mr. Obama’s performance while 49% disapproved. 10 days later, those numbers had changed. By May 11, Mr. Obama’s approval percentage had declined by one point to 48% and his disapproval percentage had increased by 3 points to 52%. Mr. Obama’s bump got ground.

Thursday May 12, 2011
 

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Wednesday May 11, 2011

RAPTURE COUNTDOWN: 10 DAYS LEFT.

Congratulations to FIRM for success in protecting us from arbitrary windstorm increases. This is one grass roots organization that we all should support because we all benefit from their efforts. Every one of us.

The ban on short term rentals is still in effect because Monroe County is an Area of Critical State Concern. We are safe from noisy vacationers until they remove the designation which realtors and developers want to remove.

Way to go, FIRM.  Great job!

If by political “progressive” you mean someone who's open-minded, likes to learn, and expects progress instead of slogans, I plead guilty.

[Kippy Watson’s Funeral] On Tuesday, May 17th at 9am, we are asking everyone to step outside and line US1. If you have an American flag, please bring it, if not, no worries we will try to have some for you. We are not congregating in a specific spot, just out to the highway wherever you are. This is to honor Kippy Watson, not only for his service locally, but also nationally. They will be starting the funeral procession in Key West at 8:45 and will be coming through Big Pine sometime around 9:15. Bulletin Board

The Rapture: May 21, 2011 continuing through October 2011. I’m concerned and confused. What kind of plans should I make? Should I close out my savings account? Should I go do the dirty deed with my girlfriends? Should I stock up on plywood like when a hurricane is approaching? Should I plan on getting onboard the ark? Should I be ready to kiss my arse goodbye? Should I continue to pay my mortgage? Should I forget about getting my IRS refund? Should I cry and pray? The list goes on and on.

What kind of plans are you making? Does anyone out there in CT land have any thoughts on this? Time is short.

Need a better iguana eradication tool? Fully automatic shotgun! http://bit.ly/eMCzMo

Sloan says "I eat a great deal of shit, in the spirit sense". I guess the old saying is true that "You are what you eat". ~divethekeys@gmail.com

Potato salad recipes. http://bit.ly/jO8t9f

[FIRM has temporarily averted...] Change back to the "file and use" basis. It's the only way to really establish fair rates and protect FL's insured. FIRM fought to get it, and then lost it in some other deal. And that deal, it was a nothing manipulation. The insurance companies hated that "file and use" was implemented, so they dangled some carrots and the trade was carrots for no more "file and use". Such a hard battle, down the drain. Time to fight the "file and use" fight again. "file and use" forces the insurance companies to actuarially justify their rate changes (also rules and forms changes) before putting them in place. "File and use" may not stop the increases 100%, but it definitely slows them down procedurally, which gives more time and exposure for review and evaluation.

The current method is Use and File - make changes first and ask permission second. That method is incredibly dangerous and destructive.
 

New mantra: File & use now!

Regarding anti-Sloan rant.  I took my own advice. I scrolled on by and only read the first 3 words of your post. But hey, thanks for playing along.

I admit it. I do nothing worthwhile in life other than being slime.

Diabetes Management Workshop May 16 to June 20. The FL Keys Area Health Education Center is sponsoring a 6 week workshop that promotes self-management of diabetes. The program is designed for those who have diabetes or a family history of diabetes. Every Mon., from 10 am until 12:30 pm at DePoo Hospital, Kennedy Dr., Key West. To sign up call Jeanne Somma, RN at Keys AHEC 743-7111, ex 208. The $20 deposit for materials will be refunded at the end of the workshop series. Bulletin Board

[Windstorm Insurance] The Fl. Keys are covered for now, but the wolves will always be at our door.  http://bit.ly/myksjH

What Deer Ed sees when he looks in the mirror.

You are not a true Christian if you think torture, like water boarding, is okay.

5 stranded pilot whales taken by Publix semi-trailer to Key Largo. Thank you Publix. http://sunsent.nl/mp4DJX

[The Rapture] What's all this Rapture stuff? I am very sure we are not to know when it will take place. Anyone picking times and dates regarding the Rapture is way off base. Rest assured when, and if, the Rapture takes place in your life time, you will be the first to know.

[Sloan and Karma] Are we to understand that Sloan is not a lawyer, but took one semester and one test in law school? Perhaps that explains a lot about the delusions of grandeur, for lack of anything substantive to support the desperate need for self-aggrandizement.

I described a criminal law final exam question my freshman year in law school. I said it was the only criminal law course I took in law school. This question is disingenuous and typical of a criminal mind.

Does he and his Sloan-sheep know what karma really is? Beyond, of course, blindly cutting and pasting a definition (without giving proper references) from a web page. Who is to say that the few of us who see Sloan for what he is are not the real-time ministers of his own very real karmic debt? For what truly is karma, but grand cause and effect, and for all his bullying and belittling of others (his self-generated causes, etc), I suggest that this group of anti-Sloan’s are delivering the now obvious and much deserved effect: karma, or more specifically, that part of karma called kamma niyama, or simply put, the consequences of one’s actions.

I am not aware of anyone who follows me; as far as I know, there are no Sloan sheep. Karma, as it was said by someone who had sheep: as you sow, so shall you reap. Raven’s western-eastern vocabulary, devious arguments and writing style resemble Jim Hendrick’s, which I would not take as a compliment, if I were Raven.

Maybe I am wrong. Perhaps it’s the angels that are making us deliver these consequential Sloan-stabs, simply because they are getting really pissed at being continuously blamed and/or credited for his oftentimes vile and malevolent spew. And as for Deer Ed divulging or publishing the names and email addresses of the anti-Sloans, I further suggest that if Sloan’s angels wanted him to know from whence these jabs were coming, they would certainly have told you or caused Deer Ed to print them. Funny that on this issue, his Angels are silent.

And maybe Raven’s soul is making him deliver what he believes are consequential Sloan-stabs because his soul wants him to hear what the angels have sloan send back. Maybe dark angels are provoking raven to attack Sloan because they hate what he tells people. Maybe raven and Deer Ed were tested by angels and convicted themselves.

The arrogant vulgarity of the sort exhibited recently by the Fool of Little Torch is naught but the feeble mind’s attempt to be overheard above the gentler and more intelligent mind. ~theravenspeaks@yahoo.com (Ed: I’m giving Sloan’s angles a little help with the address)

Deer Ed posted a personal email I sent to him, after I had emailed him not to publish it. I said I might amend it, or it might not get published at all. Later, I emailed Deer Ed an amended version to publish. The revision had some foul language, but was considerably toned down from what I had sent previously. On seeing Deer Ed had published the first email, I emailed him saying he published what I had asked him not to use, and should I take that to mean he liked the first version better? He did not reply. That was only a third-degree felony. However giving up only Raven’s email address is harboring and protecting a known fugitive and obstruction of justice, a first degree felony, which garnered Deer Ed an  F on his criminal law final exam.

Also on full transparency in today's Sunshine Festival is a chain of emails with School Board member Andy Griffiths and a piercing essay on global politics, business practices and war from a former US Navy cryptologist I used to know pretty well - he was my stepson. You can see it all by clicking on this link: transparency – School District, Coconut Telegraph, World

Mother's Day was begun by Julia Ward Howe in 1870 as a cry against the carnage of War. Arise then, all women who have hearts! Also Old Fat Naked Women for Peace video. http://bit.ly/m4vOkr

[Coconut Telegraph Beware!] Billionaire Louis Bacon wins Wikipedia defamation suit and will go after names.

In the US, Bacon would have some precedent for his actions: last year, an Illinois newspaper was forced to reveal the names of online anonymous commenters in a defamation suit. The same happened to an Indianapolis newspaper in March. And last October, a business student was able to get a court to force Google to reveal the names of commenters insulting her on YouTube.

In a similar suit a downstate Illinois newspaper must reveal the identity of an anonymous online commenter, according to a new appellate court ruling that could have wide-ranging implications for internet privacy.

The decision, a 2-1 margin in the Third District Appellate Court, says that the libelous nature of the comment kept it from being protected as free speech.

The court's majority ruled that the Maxons had the right to know. Statements of opinion are protected as free speech, but assertions of fact are not. And in the court's eyes, the comment was the latter.

[$8.6 billion dollars for Skype] Gee, it is going to cost a lot to be able to view my out-laws and mutant off-spring.

Automaker Toyota said Tuesday that while net income almost doubled and sales increased 0.2% for the fiscal year ended March 31, the earthquake that hit Japan earlier this year cost the company about ¥100 billion.

[Short Term Rentals] The Florida Keys' designation as an Area of Critical Concern exempts the county from a new state law that prohibits cities and counties from restricting short term rentals. Under the law, which awaits Gov. Rick Scott's signature, local governments cannot prevent property owners from renting housing on a daily or weekly basis unless they are in an Area of Critical Concern. http://bit.ly/jDRzUt

Fake website, press release target Missouri coal company. http://bit.ly/lrLx8k

[Gentleman walking on woman’s left] This makes no sense because to empty the chamber pot would wet everybody. The left side walking thing is for traffic protection in right lane countries and on the right side for some Euro countries. It also allows the lady to view the shops better. Dress left was the expression.

PICTURE OF THE DAY
Send us your picture. Please include a brief explanation,
where and when it was taken and your name if you want. Picture From the Keys

Yard sale telephone pole art. The pole is at the corner of US1 and Wilder Road at the light.

Caution: NATIONAL POLITICS and Religion, etc

[Extremists] Only geography separates Islamic extremism from Christian extremism.

[Tax the rich] I agree that hard work shouldn't be penalized. Heck, I'd be happy if we all paid the same percentage.  I pay four times the taxes as someone who makes half as much for me.  Maybe if I didn't work so hard, I'd have time to whine about things and figure out why the current system is fair. 

[Karl Marx] A poster yesterday, who through quoting Karl Marx, attempted to instruct the rest of us on the pitfalls of capitalism and the wonderfulness of communism. I thought this argument was settled twenty years ago. Communism is simply tyranny of the stupid and lazy against the smarter and more industrious members of society. History testifies to this.

Read some books. Perhaps if you spent some of the mental energy you spend blaming others for your misery, you could actually better yourself.

[Pakistan's Informant] The Pentagon just released a photo of the Pakistani man who gave them the information that led them to Osama bin Laden. Mullah Bush is eligible to get the $25M reward the US Gov't was offering.

If we did not execute Bin Laden can you imagine the media circus? We would have ACLU lawyers chomping at the bit to have him released and paid reparations to. Killing that cockroach was the best decision this regime has given the okay to yet. I still wouldn't vote for Obama, but every once in a while a blind hog finds an acorn.

[Politicians: A law onto themselves] It is very unfortunate that I came to this revelation in the autumn of my life. I have believed in the American system since I was introduced to it. To me, the US Constitution is carved in stone and it starts "We the People" and not we the government. It has been made clearer to me the past two years that the government does not care what the people want just as long as it has the power in their grasp. This is true at all levels of government, down to the county level. This should be very clear to all who have lived in the Keys. All the Bubbas from Key Largo to Key West were much in evidence for years. Now the Bubbas are at the federal level too. The Federal government has lied, cheated and falsified records to keep the people in the dark while humming songs of freedom into their ears. The Fed is not even a government organization, but a bunch of bankers, and they decide how much you can buy with your earnings. They are the ones that oppose the opening of new oil fields while they rake in the huge profits and empty your pockets.

I have chewed on this for a while and it left a very bad taste in my mouth.

The Donald’s time in the sun may be over. Trump has fallen to 8 percent in Public Policy Polling’s most recent survey, just a month after he led the Republican presidential field with 26 percent. Additionally, 53 percent of GOP voters now say they view him in a negative light, compared to 34 percent who view him favorably. Mike Huckabee and Mitt Romney now poll at the top of GOP race with just about 20 percent each, followed by Newt Gingrich and Sarah Palin. Trump and Ron Paul are tied for fifth. The number of GOP “birthers,” meanwhile, has fallen from 51 percent to 34 percent—and even among that smaller group, Trump only polls at 9 percent. Could it be the fanatics of the Right are returning to sanity?

Free Private Manning. http://bit.ly/k2fUBX

[Marx]  I have a different point of view. If you are quoting Carl Marx when giving opinions about capitalism, Please get out of my country.

The best jokes I have ever heard always start with: This Democrat ...

Osama Bin Laden's headstone.

[From the Right] A special note to my critic concerning the Micky D hiring imbroglio. Once again to quote Ronald Reagan, “There you go again.” You were not wrong, in fact you were right when you suggested that I had been wrong. And of course, even suggesting that the WSJ could be wrong is very wrong. Now you suggest that you were wrong in saying that I was wrong. Wrong again. Permit me to do the Right thing and apologize for my apparent error. There is nothing wrong in that. But, you can’t now deny that you’re not Right because you revealed it was me that was wrong. None the less, even when I’m wrong, I’m Right. But, I don’t believe that I’m wrong in saying that Team Obama’s BLS is not Right, nor is it correct, in one of the claims they made about employment numbers for April. In the headlines of the report they claimed that we had added 244K new jobs in April. But if we look at the report itself we see that BLS also reported that in March of ’11 (please see BLS report dated May 6, Household Data, Table A.), there were 139,864K folks who were employed. But then BLS said that in April of ’11 the number had actually declined by 190K to 139,674K. Now we find ourselves stuck with two totally different sets of numbers purportedly derived from the same data. Did something get Left behind? On the one hand the BLS headlines what it wants us to believe: 244K jobs were added. But on the other hand their own data tells us that actually 190K jobs were lost. Something is way out in Left field, something is just not Right. How can that be explained? Nonetheless, I urge my critic to try. As always, keep your eyes on the ball. Even if there were 244K jobs added as BLS claims, that is only about half of what we need for recovery in a reasonable time frame. In January of 2007, the month that the Democrats took control of Congress, our unemployment rate was 4.6%. The Democrat caused recession ended in June of 2009, today two years later our unemployment is 9% and it is forecast to stay well above 8.5% for months to come. Mr. Obama's efforts are an obvious failure, we've got to do something to improve our employment situation. Right?

Wednesday May 11, 2011

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Tuesday May 10, 2011

[All Chiefs No Indians] Congress will vote to reduce an agency's budget by 10% based on programs submitted by Departments. That Department then dictates that its agencies furlough employees, and furloughed employees are generally the real workers at the bottom of the totem pole in an agency's offices and field units. In the meantime, they keep their directors, associate directors, regional directors, and all the support staff those directors require, not to mention maintaining national headquarter offices and numerous regional offices as well as state and local offices. The U.S. Fish & Wildlife has eight Regional Offices in addition to its headquarters. In every state and territory there is a Management Office. Finally, there are field offices. Does it really take all this management to run the field offices where the real work is done - or not done because of budget constraints? Is it any wonder that the Keys refuges had no recent science on which to base their predator management plan? The plain fact is that the USFWS is top-heavy, with management spinning wonderful programs for Congress in order to get funding to keep it that way. In the meantime, no real work gets done.

USFWS is not the only agency which plays this game. The U.S. Geological Survey used to operate just fine with three regional offices, but now they have eight. I can only surmise that this was the only way these departments could get their senior staff more money - create another region and put them in charge as well as promoting others to work in that new region.

Yes, the size of government has to be reduced, but somehow Congress has to look beyond their current budget process procedures and actually look at how departments are now organized. Until that happens, departments will continue to be top-heavy, and real work will continue to take a back seat to justifying management positions.

RAPTURE COUNTDOWN: 11 DAYS LEFT.

Mr. Fred Sherman’s letter to the editor in the Citizen is full of assumptions regarding my prior work experience, job educational requirements, cost/values relationships, accountability, supervisor evaluations and Bubba system participation, to name just of few. However his contempt for public employees, union and non-union, is very clear. ~Lisa Bauer

Screw you, to everyone who still bitches about life on Big Pine. I will be moving back there as soon as possible.

Those expecting The Rapture will inevitably relive the classic study in psychology by Leon Festinger: When Prophecy Fails. Discomformation often leads to greater confirmation. http://bit.ly/wIzf0

[Toothpicks Video] it took 35 years to place over 100,000 toothpicks in place to make this wonder of wonders. http://bit.ly/i5FMcP

FIRM has temporarily averted some economic disasters, but some legislation that passed will impact YOU.  Please read on to learn what passed, what didn't, what to expect and what FIRM's next steps will be. The 2011 Florida Legislative Session is, thankfully, over. FIRM members made several trips to Tallahassee this session to lobby on behalf of Monroe County and minimize the detrimental affects of several key pieces of legislation. (Executive Director Annalise Mannix was there for the entire last week of session!)

[U-Boats] In the first few months of the second World War German U-boats sink almost seven hundred merchant ships.

[The Rapture] Some say the world ends on May 21. Good for them. Anyone who spends their last days talking about the world ending clearly has no life anyway.

[Gentleman] Some of us old timers know that a gentleman always walks on a lady’s left. That is because in olden times people would empty their chamber pots out of their second storey windows often splashing the gentleman below, thus protecting the lady.

[Truth] If you want to make people angry, lie to them. If you want to make them absolutely livid, tell them the truth.

Microsoft reportedly is going to pay $8.6 billion dollars for Skype, the online (VIOP) phone service and it 660,000,000 users across the world. This acquisition will be the largest Microsoft has ever made.

If The Rapture does take place it will be by alien abductions!

Saving the whales? Maybe not so much. I know it feels good to think you're helping, but consider this. Those marine mammals are so sick they are afraid of drowning so they beach themselves. In many cases we give them drugs for infections. A few may live, most don't. The few of them that may return to their pods may be carriers of a super bug, killing or making many more whales sick. Nature has been doing a very good job forever without our help. Don't get your panties in a bunch; just think about it more before you interfere with Nature.

[Sloan and Karma] Are we to understand that Sloan is not a lawyer, but took one semester and one test in law school? Perhaps that explains a lot about the delusions of grandeur, for lack of anything substantive to support the desperate need for self-aggrandizement.
 

Does he and his Sloan-sheep know what karma really is? Beyond, of course, blindly cutting and pasting a definition (without giving proper references) from a web page. Who is to say that the few of us who see Sloan for what he is are not the real-time ministers of his own very real karmic debt? For what truly is karma, but grand cause and effect, and for all his bullying and belittling of others (his self-generated causes, etc), I suggest that this group of anti-Sloan's are delivering the now obvious and much deserved effect: karma, or more specifically, that part of karma called kamma niyama, or simply put, the consequences of one's actions.
 

Maybe I am wrong. Perhaps it's the angels that are making us deliver these consequential Sloan-stabs, simply because they are getting really pissed at being continuously blamed and/or credited for his oftentimes vile and malevolent spew. And as for Deer Ed divulging or publishing the names and email addresses of the anti-Sloans, I further suggest that if Sloan’s angels wanted him to know from whence these jabs were coming, they would certainly have told you or caused Deer Ed to print them. Funny that on this issue, his Angels are silent.
 

The arrogant vulgarity of the sort exhibited recently by the Fool of Little Torch is naught but the feeble mind's attempt to be overheard above the gentler and more intelligent mind.  ~theravenspeaks@yahoo.com (Ed: I’m giving Sloan’s angles a little help with the address)

The Canadians make us look like sissies as they are very candid in their ads and actually show a great sense of humor!! Maybe more of our road signs could be as humorous to keep drivers more alert!

5 beached pilot whales survive another night in the Keys. http://cbsloc.al/mSM1zY

[Sloan] In reply to “Sloan is weird” on yesterday’s Coconut Telegraph, Sloan always was sort of different, but after the angels grabbed him in early 1987, he went from somewhat different to weirder and weirder -- by human standards. Now humans seem weird to him, so it’s understandable he seems weird to them.

As for this on yesterday’s CT: Sloan says, "I don’t mind the Editor publishing anyone’s pokes at me." Sloan, the trick, healthy choice, wise move, is to ignore them, no response is required, let it die for lack of a second. At what point do you say this is not where I want to use my time and talents. At some point you become ingrained, entwined, woven into the drama. Instead of it being about you, it is you (the “you are what you eat” syndrome.)

I was told much the same thing by someone a few days ago, who reads the CT, and that there are other ways to talk to people than how I do it. People don’t like hearing about bad stuff. They want to be met where they are and encouraged to express their beauty. I replied, “Like Jesus did it?? Some tongue in cheek, as he often busted people’s balls. Then, I said the only choice I have is whether I will do what the angels tell me to do, or not do it. I likened it to “Not my will but God’s will be done.”
 

What the angels first did with me was stand me in front of a mirror and hold me there for what seemed like eternity. They wanted me to see every ugly thing there was to see about me, so I would know me. As they progressed with me, they had me do much the same with other people they put before me. They had me write two books about that way of going about things, a veritable course not in miracles but in mirrors. It was horrible.

My wife at that time took to telling people, who asked what I did, as in, what was my job?, that I was the mailman. I delivered the message. She also took to telling people that I could see through buildings and around corners. She couldn’t figure out how I did it, but I did it. That was something else the angels changed about me. They changed many things about me, including making it so that I could not knowingly not tell the truth. Over time I came to understand not telling someone the truth was the most unloving thing I could do to people, even though they might feel it was the meanest thing I could do to them.

Also over time, I came to understand the human dramas the angels were feeding me were designed to accelerate my own spiritual development and to offer other people a chance to accelerate their own physical development. Mine was to engage them as I was trained to engage them, and as I was shown in dreams to engage them, or not engage them. This was my daily bread, my spiritual food, which I was to eat whether I wanted to eat it or not. The CT is used with me in that way. When someone is put on my plate there, I engage that person, and often it tastes pretty bad, while sometimes it tastes horrible.

I eat a great deal of shit, in the spirit sense. It goes down my gullet, in the spirit sense, and then a digestion process begins, which physically is pretty rugged, or even worse. It would send other people straight to a doctor, or even to a hospital. But as I do my part of it, the shit is metabolized, in the spirit sense. Then, it passes through and out of me and is different from when it was put into me. This is an ongoing thing with me. One serving after another is put into me by the angels. I use two of those servings in this post to try once again to explain what I do in addition to being the mailman.

It is not my role to meet people where they are, plenty of people do that already. My role is to show people where they can go, if they really want to leave where they are. When he ran for President, Barack Obama offered hope and change. As did the weird ruffian Jesus offer hope and change. As do the angels, through me, offer hope and change. Real hope, real change, which is very different from what President Obama promised and now delivers.

There is a great deal more below on America at war. Much of it is other people’s controversial commentaries, which seem closer to reality to me than anything coming out of the White House, the news media, or the Republican or Democratic Parties. You do not want to know or experience what I endure internally, as I graze through this global shit cuisine. By way of comparison, dining with the suicide taunter on the CT was like eating apple pie a la mode.

See the whole enchilada today by clicking on this link: Sloan is weird, more American foreign intrigue. Again, parental guidance recommended for Republicans and Democrats. Bon aperitif.

National Weather Service warnings, watches and advisories. http://1.usa.gov/lDRCLr

Educating with the Extension service’s newsletter. http://bit.ly/jFhTUE

Today I bent the truth to be kind, and I have no regret, for I am far surer of what is kind than I am of what is true.

Cuba announced that they are legalizing the sale of real estate and cars and expanding the ranks of private cooperatives. They’ll also be able to buy new cars and not have to drive around in 60 year old Ladas.

I love The Rapture countdown. I can’t wait. I'll be there!

PICTURE OF THE DAY
Send us your picture. Please include a brief explanation,
where and when it was taken and your name if you want. Picture From the Keys

This photo was taken off Woman Key and is usually a very good area for dolphin watching.

Caution: NATIONAL POLITICS and Religion, etc

[False Humor] Stop attributing false quotes to late-night hosts. You right-wingers have no sense of humor of your own, so you cut & paste terrible jokes from some right-wing sites and blame them on the late-night hosts. I'd say be original and be truthful, but it's probably not in your genetic make-up.

Republicans tout unfettered and unregulated capitalism as the answer to our problems. They want to bust unions and take away the working man's bargaining power and benefits. They want us to thank the wealthy for "allowing" us a trickle-down job. Why? Because Republicans know Karl Marx was correct when he described the relationship between unemployment and the capitalist system. Marx pointed out these principles of capitalism:

-Unemployment is inherent within the unstable capitalist system and periodic crises of mass unemployment are to be expected.

-The unemployed function within the capitalist system to provide a "reserve army of labor" that creates downward pressure on wages.

-This reserve army of labor fight among themselves for scarce jobs at lower and lower wages.

-Unemployment is profitable to large corporations and capitalist owners because unemployment lowers wages which means lower costs to the owners.

-Capitalism unfairly manipulates the market for labor by perpetuating unemployment which lowers laborers' demands for fair wages.

-Workers are pitted against one another for the purpose of increasing profits for owners.

The bottom line: If you are a working man or woman and you vote for Republicans, you really need your head examined.

FTR is obsessed with money.

Global warming and sea level rise are hog wash. Anyone interested in geology can see that the sea levels have risen and fallen many times over the eons, and way before humans were around. You don't need FTR to point that out to you. It is part of the life cycle of this planet and no matter how much money you throw at it, there is nothing you can do about it. Quit accepting it as fact, it is just somebody's theory and a phony one at that. Man made global warming has been proven to be based on junk science and agenda driven science. Gov't agencies like to believe in it because it ensures more useless projects and worthless Gov't jobs sucking up the tax dollar.

[Weekly jobs report and McDonalds] I would never suggest FTR was wrong. I suggested the Wall street Journal was wrong. According to Wikipedia (I hate to quote them), "The Bureau of Labor Statistics releases preliminary data on the third Friday after the conclusion of the reference week, i.e., the week which includes the 12th of the month, at 8:30 a.m. Eastern Time. Typically this date occurs on the first Friday of the month.

[Racial Jokes] A poster Monday asked why the late night show hosts weren’t being called racists for making Obama jokes. It is because they are not racist. Like most bigots, yesterday‘s poster can’t tell a racially motivated joke from a political joke.

[More Jobs] The U.S. economy added a stronger-than-expected 244,000 jobs in April, the Labor Department said Friday, as employers continued the solid pace of job creation seen in the prior two months.

The number of jobs created last month was well above the 185,000 new jobs that analysts had predicted, the government reported. Private employers added 268,000 jobs — the most since February 2006.

April marked the third straight month in which more than 200,000 jobs were created, the best three month hiring spree in five years. Job gains in March and February were even stronger than first reported.

“The trend now is definitely up,” former Federal Reserve governor Larry Meyer told CNBC Friday. “The economy is regaining momentum and we are on the path for above-trend growth. This [number] is much stronger than expected.”

However, the jobs report showed the nation’s unemployment rate rose to 9 percent in April from a two-year low of 8.8 percent seen in the prior month. The increase was the first since November, but was due in part to the fact that more Americans have resumed looking for work.

Reacting to Friday’s jobs numbers, Austan Goolsbee, the chairman of the White House Council of Economic Advisers, told CNBC he expected the nation’s unemployment rate to fall if job creation continues at its current pace. We can't say the economy is worst then reported because of people giving up looking for work because now people are looking again and feeling confident.

[From the Right] Well folks, have you decided if you are better off today than you were a few years ago? Just for fun let’s say that in 2007 and early 2008 your home was worth about $450,000 here in the BPK area. You really liked that, you didn’t like the taxes, but you liked the value. But, by about midyear 2008 big trouble had begun. The insane spending of the Republicans and Democrats had begun to come home to roost. The smell of strangling debt was in the air. Corruption and mismanagement that had been coddled by left wing legislators had finally sealed the fate of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac. By midyear a legislative decision had been taken that we had to bail out FF/FF. Our vaunted CBO promised us that the bailout would “only” cost us about $25 billion, with only a 5% chance of the price tag reaching $100 billion between them. We were stupid. We believed the CBO and we gave FF/FF the money. They actually got a blank check. Since then FF/FF have been back for more and more infusions of your tax dollars to keep them afloat. By July 2009 they had soaked up about $890 billion of your hard earned dollars. If you want to really get pissed off, just research how much money the CEO’s of FF/FF made during that time while they were losing so much of your money. Just the other day, grab your Fannie, Fannie was back. This week they reported that under their management they had just suffered about yet another $11 billion in credit losses on the firm's giant mortgage portfolio that led to a fresh $6.5 billion loss in the last quarter. Now they say that they will have to have just a tad more money; only a mere $8.5 billion more to stay afloat. Fannie now owes the Treasury $2.2 billion for the first quarter, so it's taking money from the Treasury to pay the Treasury. So really, Fannie isn't paying that $2.2 billion it owes, but requesting another $6.3 billion on top of it. Unfortunately, the future doesn't look very bright for Fannie. Reliable pundits say that the actual costs to keep them wasting money will kiss $1 trillion. FF now admits that their debt will never be manageable. All of this money was pissed away with the promise that it was necessary to ensure that the real estate market and our economy would remain viable. Well, Deer Friends, our economy is in the giant toilet. And your home is now worth about half of what it was worth in 2007. The Huffington Post just reported that the value of your property will take yet another hit. Home values fell by about 3% in just the last 3 months. Can you take any comfort in the report that nearly 30% of all homeowners now owe more than their home is worth? HP says that that trend will probably not turn around until about 2012. All of this was visited on you and I by a liberal government that was hell bent on social engineering. FF and FF should be cut adrift.

(Part 2) Exercise your grey matter: Please tell us why it is in the best interests of our nation to execute Bin Laden on foreign soil without the benefit of due process? If executing Bin Laden was in our best interests, and fully appropriate, why was it not in our best interests to submit his subordinates to enhanced interrogation which ultimately led to his capture/execution and have been greatly instrumental is keeping us safe for nearly 10 years?

Tuesday May 10, 2011
 

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Monday May 9, 2011

RAPTURE COUNTDOWN: 12 DAYS LEFT.

[The Rapture] When the day of The Rapture comes and goes without event, the faithful will just say they misinterpreted the bible—again, and simply tell us God spoke to them and told them The Rapture will happen on some other day that they'll choose based on their faith.

That’s what the Seventh Day Adventists did in the 70s when the End of Days was predicted, which was an update to their previous prediction—where nothing happened on that day either. Then they proceeded to predict another Rapture. I lost interest at that point and don’t know if the world ended or not because I moved to the Keys.

Suicide is devastating. My sister at the age of 56 put a .38 in her mouth and killed herself. She was beautiful, healthy and with grown children. We'll never know the whole story, but to me it was the most selfish thing a person could do. It's been 5 years and I am still angry at her for hurting our mother like this. Suicide is not a joke.

Terry Miller off Little Palm Reef 5/07/2011

[Gas prices] I had to drive from Key West to Homestead last week and it cost me $65 for the round trip in my 2010 pickup truck.

[The Rapture] When the day of The Rapture comes and goes without event, the religious dreamers will just say they misinterpreted the bible—again, and simply tell us God spoke to them and told them it will happen on some other day. That’s what the Seventh Day Adventists did in the 70s when the end of Days was predicted, which was an update to their previous prediction—where nothing happened then, either. They then proceeded to predict another Rapture, but I lost interest at the point and don’t know if the world ended or not.

3 day conference about sea level change. http://bit.ly/jJQHEs

[The Rapture] The way you are pounding your keyboard, this should be spelled rupture!

The director Duncan Jones is the son of David Bowie. His best film to date was the si-fi Moon and has just released his second si-fi thriller Source Code—a payback movie.

2 pilot whales released; 5 in pen. http://bit.ly/lMqJq0

Hooking of endangered Sea Turtles triggers controversy over Florida Fishery. http://bit.ly/kwFjwz

Thank you for publishing my post to my long-time wannabe girlfriend. Nothing will ease the hurt in my heart, but I thank you, not only for providing such a service to our community, but also for putting up with fools like me who either can’t type, or can’t spell.

All about butterflies. http://bit.ly/l0ls3p

Sloan says, “I don't mind the Editor publishing anyone's pokes at me.” Sloan, the trick, healthy choice, wise move, is to ignore them, no response is required, let it die for lack of a second. At what point do you say this is not where I want to use my time and talents.

At some point you become ingrained, entwined, woven into the drama. Instead of it being about you, it is you (the “you are what you eat” syndrome.)

No two gardens are the same. No two days are the same in any one garden.

[The Marathon Rock Coalition] Among the community elders, local history is an everyday opportunity to train the young. They keep the community’s past fresh as they head into the future. Earliest recollections show some kind of fisheries at the rock. I am not sure if that is what is called today Pretty Joe Rock or some other version of the story.

Soon enough though, the stereotypes trotted out of people’s mouths. We know quite clearly that this sentiment was filled with racist connotations. Why use the Rock Coalition as the name of this community’s organized effort to influence events in their neighborhoods? You do not bury such terms as bigoted, narrow-minded, discrimination, prejudice, unfair, opinionated, biased, or intolerance. You do not pretend that today they do not exist. You use the stereotypical name “The Rock Coalition” as a slap in the face of stereotypical nonsense.
 

This community is known as a supposedly poor neighborhood. When I campaigned during the 2010 election season, I walked all Marathon streets stopping at every business and home. You cannot realize the actual truth until you do that. Have any past candidates done that? No. Then let me share my insight. This community filled out many checks for my campaign. Any big ones? No. Many little ones? Yes. I found contributions from this community to be like gold. I also found few people who were poor.
 

A Monroe County Marathon unit deputy sheriff recently stated in a local newspaper that 41^st Street was a known drug place. I lived there on 42^nd Street with my family for two years. This community has no more or less drug activity than any other Marathon community. Frankly, this community is representative of most communities. Let us slap such connotations in the face.
 

It was suggested that the 36^th through 46^th Street corridor does not have any homeowners living there and paying property taxes according to an elite few. Not true, once again. There are many long-time homeowners paying their property taxes religiously. There are many renters paying the local property owners rent and thus part of paying property tax dollars. For this tax-burdened community, they receive very little respect or city support.

Here are a few examples: 42nd Street floods routinely after almost any rain. We have two historic churches under water regularly. The Comprehensive Plan says that we have to have a historic committee to help owners maintain and show off these historical places. I am not talking about the Key West tree Nazis, but a committee to make things happen with the concurrence of all players involved.
 

Taxpayer homes are flooded as well. While the community and the city attempted talks about adequate solutions, neither side stayed persistent. The final city solution of a French drain was ineffective immediately, a waste of taxpayer money. The city and this community must come together again and make a deep injection well happen not after years, but only months. This community expects fair value for any property needed for a deep injection well. We cannot be the city of “no” and be satisfied with only one try at resolution.
 

Jesse Hobbs Park is the 36^th through 46^th Street’s pocket park. This unique park serves not only this community but also all of Marathon. The playground and the basketball court are essential components to any successful community. Infrastructure maintenance and updates are not adequate compared to similar infrastructure citywide. The community has talked about an annual event in the winter with a 3-on-3 basketball tournament. The city is willing, the community desires such an event, and yet little progress has been made. Both sides need to be persistent and productive. One cannot make things happen in the community without the other.
 

Jesse Hobbs Park’s one embarrassing problem is the clunky port-a-potty, dark, dank, and smelly. This community was promised a unisex permanent concrete restroom maintained and cleaned regularly. Go by the corner of US1 and 41^st Street to see that the port-a-potty is still there and likely the same one used for years. Okay, the Rock Coalition and the city must together resolve this embarrassment.
 

Who from the city got permission of narrow-42^nd-street residents for big trucks constantly going back and forth with wastewater and storm water project debris? The answer from the Rock Coalition representing the community is a resounding “no”! 42^nd Street is so narrow that trucks clip fences and other property. All this damage and dusty debris goes all the way back at the end of 42^nd Street, where it is dumped on Discount Rock & Sand property. Cooperating with the community does not include doing whatever you want along taxpayer properties without notification and permission.
 

My campaign promise, win or lose, was to represent this community that is not unlike all the other Marathon communities. I walked all these communities meeting real people, many living paycheck to paycheck. From 2010 Election Day in early November to now, the 36^th through 46^th streets community already organized and consistently voting are forming the Rock Coalition to advocate for their community. Others are welcome to join them or found out how to do so on their own. I use the term “The Rock Coalition” and will do so until the community directs otherwise. I have accepted from community leaders the role of speaking out on their behalf, but the Rock Coalition’s power is from their more than 300 bullet votes.
 

“Bullet voting is a tactic in which the voter only selects one candidate, despite the option to indicate a preference for other candidates. They might do this either because it is easier than evaluating all the candidates, or (depending on the voting system in use) as a form of tactical voting.”
“If enough voters bullet vote, almost any voting system functions like a plurality voting system. This is generally considered a poor result, as many voting systems are intended as reforms or improvements that avoid or minimize some alleged disadvantages of plurality (aka first past the post.”
 

It is funny now how many former advocates are regretting their decision to vote for this flawed and illegal voting system. A return to “seat” candidate races looks good right now. Until then, a wise candidate uses existing votes assured to them to just vote once for that candidate ensuring each vote is tantamount to three votes. If a wise candidate gets at least 100 voters to bullet vote, that is like 300 votes. Be assured that 300 votes will change many an election outcome. This strategy has been routinely used over the last several years. If a candidate does not use this strategy, they will lose.

The Rock Coalition offers more than 300 bullet votes, campaign volunteers, and many little campaign contributions to Rock-Coalition-endorsed candidates. Late September or early October this year, the Rock Coalition will host a candidate open forum most likely the historical BME Church on 41^st Street. The political power of this pro-union community cannot be underestimated. Candidates do so at their own peril.

There is more political power on your street, organized, than one vote at a time.   ~Publisher@MarathonJournal.US

[Help Save Nine Mile Canyon] Big energy targets private property. Slide show of Nine Mile Canyon. http://bit.ly/l8a052

Hi Sloan! The chicken-shit-dirt-bag here. I really enjoyed your post yesterday, it was everything I hoped it would be. I can just imagine the spittle flying from your frothing mouth as you pounded on the keyboard to spew your hatred to the world. Very entertaining, please give us more.

[Stuff I've heard] If you place a dryer sheet between your butt cheeks, your farts won't stink.

[Weed or Plant] The best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out easily, it is a valuable plant.

A while ago a new supermarket opened near my house. It has an automatic water mister to keep the produce fresh. Just before it goes on, you hear the sound of distant thunder and the smell of fresh rain. When you pass the milk cases, you hear cows mooing and you experience the scent of fresh mowed hay. In the meat department there is the aroma of charcoal grilled steaks with onions. When you approach the egg case, you hear hens cluck and cackle, and the air is filled with the pleasing aroma of bacon and eggs frying. The bread department features the tantalizing smell of fresh baked bread and cookies.
I don't buy toilet paper there any more.

Happy March 69^th! Hooray, hooray for the 8th of May. National Outdoor Intercourse Day.

Sloan is weird. Sent from my iPad.

PICTURE OF THE DAY
Send us your picture. Please include a brief explanation,
where and when it was taken and your name if you want. Picture From the Keys

Our Poinciana tree is  just starting to bloom and is beautiful.

Caution: NATIONAL POLITICS and Religion, etc

[Jobs] There were over a quarter of a million jobs created in the private sector last month. The recovery is under way no matter what spin the Right puts on it. That’s a quarter of a million new jobs!

[Tax All Equally] Quiet a few times in my life I have had money and just as often not. At this time I am pretty well in the not stage. I am probably older than 9 out of 10 posters on this site, but let me tell you when I get up in the morning I still go after the brass ring. It nauseates me to see so many people today piss and moan because some politician is supposedly taking money away from them and giving it to some rich dude. In the overwhelming instances it is the rich that gets this country going and provides thousands of jobs for everyone, even the whiners. This class warfare has gotten to the point of insanity with many of these drones, who just can't understand why some people should get more than others, just because they think and work harder.

[The Rapture] Immediately after the Tribulation of those days the Sun shall be darkened and the moon shall not give its light, and the stars shall fall from heaven, and the powers of the heavens shall be shaken: And then shall appear the sign of the Son of man in heaven: and then shall all the tribes of the earth mourn, and they shall see the Son of man coming in the clouds of heaven with power and great glory. And he shall send his angels with a great sound of a trumpet, and they shall gather together his elect from the four winds, from one end of heaven to the other.

The Rapture is when Christians will be gathered together in the air to meet Christ.

[Global Warming] How can the Citizen make such a fool of itself? Their article about global warming and sea level rise is pure hogwash. FTR, our definitive know-it-all, proved that global warming and sea level rise is baloney sometime ago. The Citizen owes FTR an apology. Once FTR makes a pronouncement, the subject is closed. Our County Administrator attending such a conference is a complete waste of time.

[Good Head] “I also believe that it's an insult for a Muslim to be without a head at his death.” I also believe in karma: what goes around comes around. I also believe that people leave their houses with the expectation of returning home. I also believe that a nation whose people lose their lives due to insanity are entitled to inflict the same. And if that means no head, good, and the worse the insult the better.

[Don’t Tax the Rich More] I live in a modest neighborhood and have a neighbor next door that I am friendly with. Each year I work a little harder, a little smarter, and a little longer than he does, and each year my income reflects this. We receive the same services from the local government and drive the same roads, yet it cost me twice as much in taxes at the end of each year.

So I would ask you why must it cost me more to live in America than my neighbor or anyone else for that matter, after all taxes are what we pay to live here and the price we pay for the services our government provides. I do not receive any extra benefit from the additional taxes I pay each year over and above anyone else.

To tell me that because I work harder that it is my responsibility to pay more, that is like punishing a kid for doing well in school. We should all pay the same amount for the same services; after all, we are all given the same opportunities.

It is time to reduce government spending and size, then to create a tax system that is fair for all citizens, not one where those who do pay for those who don't. Do not mistake this to mean we should not care for those who need care, I am just saying that the burden for that care should fall on all, not just the rich.

[Birthers] It turns out Bobby Jindal has a more foreign name then our President. Yet where are the birthers asking about his birth certificate and parents paperwork? Jindal was born in the United States to Indian immigrant parents who held green cards at the time. The flap started when Jindal said last month that he would sign a state bill, if it reached his desk, that would require candidates for federal office on the Louisiana ballot to show proof of birth in the U.S. The bill was a response to doubts about President Barack Obama's Hawaii birth raised by possible Republican presidential candidates such as businessman Donald Trump. Obama recently released his full birth certificate to squelch the doubts.

 
Jindal's office angrily responded that the newspaper had got the governor's middle name wrong. "Amrit," was the name of an ancient Middle East city, Jindal's office said, and not his middle name. Jindal offered to release his birth certificate to prove it. The Advocate received the birth certificate, apologized for use of an incorrect middle name and removed "Amrit" from the online version of the editorial.

Asked about the incident, The Advocate Executive Editor Carl Redman told Reuters, "I think the point of the editorial was that the Indian American governor of Louisiana should not be worried about people's origins and birthplaces. That's one of the great things about this country."

But the incident lived on when the New Orleans Times-Picayune on Saturday ran a photo of the birth certificate and a long article about the details of his parents' entry into the United States.

The birth certificate shows his name as only Piyush Jindal with no middle name. Jindal has long used the first name Bobby. Jindal's spokesman confirmed on Saturday the details in the article of his parents' arrival in the United States. They came on green cards secured by Jindal's engineer father, Amar Jindal, based on a 1965 law that allowed people with "exceptional ability in the sciences or arts" to enter the U.S. Jindal's mother Raj got a spouse green card.

Bernie Pinsonat, a Baton Rouge political analyst and pollster, said the whole saga could confuse some people. "I have no idea why he did this (release the certificate) except maybe he thinks he'll get some popularity points nationally," Pinsonat said. "Nobody in Louisiana doubts that he was born in the United States."Will the birthers accept Piyush as a valid candidate for vice president? The double standard is alive and doing very well in the Republican Party.

We should also demand to see his college records.

[Racist Jokers] Why are late night TV hosts telling political jokes about Obama now? Do they finally understand what we've been screaming about for 2 1/2 years? The bigger question is why aren't they being called racists like everyone else was? Why are they getting a free pass to ridicule Obama, when no one else could?
Jay Leno: The liberals are asking us to give Obama time. We agree, & think 25 to life would be appropriate.
Jay Leno: America needs Obama-care like Nancy Pelosi needs a Halloween mask.

Conan O'Brien Q: Have you heard about McDonald's' new Obama Value Meal? A: Order anything you like & the guy behind you has to pay for it.

Jay Leno Q: What does Barack Obama call lunch with a convicted felon? A: A fund raiser.

David Letterman Q: What's the difference between Obama's cabinet & a penitentiary? A: One is filled with tax evaders, blackmailers & threats to society. The other is for housing prisoners.

Jimmy Fallon Q: If Nancy Pelosi & Obama were on a boat in the middle of the ocean & it started to sink, who would be saved? A: America!

Jimmy Kimmel Q: What's the difference between Obama & his dog, Bo? A: Bo has papers.

David Letterman Q: What was the most positive result of the "Cash for Clunkers" program? A: It took 95% of the Obama bumper stickers off the road.

The brilliant Theodor Geisel wrote: “Be who you are & say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter & those who matter don't mind.” Geisel penned the Dr. Seuss books.

[From the Right] A poster, yesterday, suggested that I was wrong when I remarked that 62K of the purported new jobs that BLS reported as being created in April of 2011 were jobs created by MickyD’s. If that is accurate, then the jobs creation numbers really suck. The poster bases his accusation on a blog entry in the Wall Street Journal. Here's the facts M'am: Team Obama’s BLS’ April jobs report stated: “Nonfarm payroll employment rose by 244,000 in April, and the unemployment rate edged up to 9.0 percent..”…” The number of unemployed persons, at 13.7 million, changed little in April.” My critic wrote: “The publicized job hiring day (MacDonalds) was April 19th, one week after the April survey period." So FTR, the WSJ is wrong again? “ Well, if we are to believe that WSJ blogger, Team Obama’s BLS stopped counting jobs on April 12^th. Do you suppose that they did? I don't think so. My response is: MickyD’s bragged of hiring 62K persons on or about April 19th. Team Obama clearly stated that its report was for the entire month of April. In fact, the report was not even released until on or about May 6^th. Was I wrong? You’ll decide.

(Part 2) Folks seemed to have been interested in jobs yesterday, so let’s review. In April 2010, a year ago, Joe Biden predicted that under the wise care of Team Obama, the U.S. economy would add 200K jobs the following month, with 250K-300K jobs per month “soon”. He said: "We caught a lot of bad breaks on the way down. We're going to catch a few good breaks because of good planning on the way up.” It is a fact that In the 12 months since that braggadocios silliness on the part of Joe Biden, we have added only relatively few jobs. If you look at the BLS report dated May 6^th for the month of April 2011, on HOUSHOLD DATA Table A, you will see that in April of 2010 BLS said that there were 139,382 K persons employed. 12 Months later, April 2011, there were 139,674K persons employed. Well, that tells us that we’ve added only 292K persons to the rolls of the employed in the past 12 months. That’s an average of about 24.3K new jobs per month. We all know that we must have 250K to 300K new jobs per month to pull out of our mess that was delivered to us by the Democrat controlled Congress beginning in 2007. Please remember that those numbers are not my invention, rather they are taken directly from the afore mentioned publication, please check it out. Joe Biden promised us 250-300K new jobs per month. We got an average of 24.3K new jobs per month. So much for Team Obama’s “good planning”! Or maybe I’m just figuring it all wrong. I don't think so, but My Deer Critic friend, if you can, please explain to all of us the flaw(s) in my thinking. Did I mention that the April 2011 unemployment rate remains unchanged at 9% from 24 months ago at about the same time that recession officially ended? Did I mention that when the Democrats took control of Congress in January of 2007 the unemployment rate was 4.6%?

Monday May 9, 2011

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Sunday May 8, 2011

Rapture countdown: 13 days left.

[Suicide is Forever] If I thought for one second that Sloan was at all serious about suicide I would never be so flippant about the subject. To me he seems like such a drama queen that the suicide talk fit well with his "everybody look at me" personality. Since the editor feels that there might be some chance, however small, that he could follow through with it I will refrain from ever mentioning the subject again. I don't want anyone to think I would actually promote a suicide.

Former Navy dolphin Theresa dead at 56. http://bit.ly/jzS5ta

Cudjoe Key resident, Phil Goodman gets gubernatorial bug-board interview. Cudjoe Key resident Phil Goodman appears to be the first -- perhaps the only -- applicant to succeed the late Dick Rudell on the Florida Keys Mosquito Control Board who will be interviewed by Gov. Rick Scott's staff for possible appointment.

Goodman was unavailable for comment Friday and Scott's Office of Open Government did not respond to calls by press time. It's unclear with whom Goodman would interview.

Goodman is a retired business owner who co-founded and was president of Boehme Philatex, a textile chemical company, for some 25 years. He retired full-time to the Keys two years ago from Reidsville, N.C.

His wife, Debby, chairs the Republican Party of Monroe County. Mosquito Control Board Commissioner Jack Bridges of Key Largo is a member of the county's Republican Executive Committee. And the governor is a Republican.

Board Chairman Bill Shaw sent Scott a letter in support of Goodman.

"I didn't do it out of the kindness of my heart. I met with him and spent two and a half hours talking to him. He would make a good board member," he said.

There are 11 applicants to fill the seat of Rudell, who died in February shortly into his fourth four-year term. The District 2 seat covers from Bay Point to 74th Street in Marathon.

[Whales] Two of the seven surviving pilot whales stranded in the Lower Keys are being released. http://bit.ly/l7PiLW

Don't worry so much. It is not part of the Keys lifestyle.

Screw you, Governor Scott. I don't know about anyone else, but I like to get kissed when I get screwed, which is what you've done buy giving to the rich and taking from the rest of us.

Shark love. It’s a good thing for this diver that the sharks were horney and not hungry! The next time a shark attacks you gently rub his nose. http://bit.ly/gtGw8x

Street People need training. Give them a broom and put them to work cleaning anything! Most street people do not look like they are starving.

[Photography] Sand in Surf by Clark Little This shot captures sand from the ocean's floor being swept up by a monstrous wave and resembles a sandstorm.  Little calls it the Sand monster.  There were clouds of sand ten feet high and I'm standing there. I'm holding on to my camera and my trigger as long as I can. Then I have to jump into the cloud of sand to try to get out of danger's way.  His fans pay as much as $4,000 for his gorgeous photos.

This guy stands in the water and waits until the last sec to snap his camera shutter then takes a beating when the wave collapses over him. http://bit.ly/sDEHs

Money for skiing? Universal sign language, oui. Video

Slinky was not invented by Naval engineer Richard James. The Slinky was invented by a garage machinist in South West Philly who made piston rings. He gave his kid a rejected coil of the tempered rings before they were cut and the kid had the first Slinky.

The Japan earthquake shifted the earth’s axis 6.7 inches. That new axis has to be calculated in all space shots’ trajectory.

[Iguanas] While helping for the last time as a Monroe County Master Gardener at the Keys Energy Free Tree giveaway, I was reminded of the Iguana Be Gone products. They are available at: M.A.R.C. Plant Store in Key West, Mama's Nursery, Rockland Key, Bayshore Nursery, Ramrod Key and Octopus' Garden on Big Pine Key. They are also introducing a new mosquito candle. Both are great products to help keep these two pests away.

[Planets] This month, four of the five naked-eye planets gather along the eastern horizon near dawn. The celestial grouping is seen here just before sunrise on May 5, from a beach near Buenos Aires, Argentina. Starting near the top of the frame, the brightest beacon is Venus. Mercury is below and right of Venus and brilliant Jupiter is lower still, near image center. Below Jupiter, Mars is relatively faint and struggles the most to shine through a thin cloud bank and the warming twilight glow. Watch, and as the month progresses the tantalizing configuration will change, with Mars and Jupiter moving higher while Venus and Mercury wander through the sky closer to the rising sun.

Jessica Calitri, 25, of Big Pine Key, was charged with theft and burglary for stealing a purse from a house on Ramrod Key and then burying it in a wooded area. She was arrested Wednesday.

It seems Big Pine Key is tied with Islamorada for the most thieves contest.

[Affordable Housing] The QTvan was especially designed for the Royal Wedding this week. Elderly folks who wish to see the happy couple without spending the night on the sidewalk can buy this caravan that’s not only light enough, but made to be pulled by a scooter. Price tag: £5,500

[Whale Deaths] It’s a shame that whales die, but people should stop their futile efforts to save doomed critters. It stresses them out more and prolongs their deaths. They should be able to die in peace without a bunch of touchy-feely volunteers messing with them and force feeding the poor things. I’ve been involved in two such efforts and witnessed the uselessness in it, but it did give me bragging rights and I had a great time—the critters did not. I think mammal rescues have a success rate in the low nothings.

[Old Man Boogie] I can still “get down”.  It’s getting up that gives me trouble.

Be a hurricane volunteer.
Red Cross Lower Keys 305-296-4033

Red Cross Upper Keys 305-852-9612

Paradise Interfaith Network 305-797-3926

Salvation Army 305-294-5611 

What kind of volunteer opportunities are there?
Call center and rumor control (referring people to help in a disaster)
Helping victims of a disaster
Assisting in shelters or distributing essentials
Data entry and office support during a disaster

Fantasy Reef? Is that anywhere near Poser Island? Ha.

Bad things come in threes is the old superstition. I hope it’s over for now because we have our three: Kippy Watson, Charlie Planet and Terry Miller.

Weeds are Nature's graffiti.

7 whales live, 13 die in stranding on Cudjoe Key. http://bit.ly/izSEcU

[Sloan] Nasty email okay by me. However, I don't mind the Editor publishing anyone's, "pokes" at me (hate mail), or at anyone on the CT, as long as he provides the author's name and email address. That's the price such folks should pay for getting free air time on the CT, or on any blog. Anything less is pure chicken shit dirt bag and infantile.

I recall writing of one mainland woman and two Keys women having been molested in childhood, who did not like my writing that. I have written that women who were molested in childhood need to have sex with a man they care about, and vice versa, as part of their healing of the molestation. I did not suggest they have sex with me to be healed. I was not attracted to them and had no interest in having sex with them, and did not suggest they should have sex with me. Maybe this chicken shit dirt bag is queer and projected his lust for my bod onto those women?

I have written of a woman who was molested for many years by her father, who ended up marrying me many years later. She'd never had an orgasm by sexual intercourse, but she had orgasms through sexual intercourse with me. Having sex with me was part of her healing. I have written of other women who were molested, who married me, and sex with was part of their healing. Two of them also had never had orgasm through sexual intercourse. One had never had an orgasm by any method, but they had orgasms through sexual intercourse with me.

“Biker Chick” wrote to the Coconut Telegraph, after she and I made love one time, my angels healed her. I don't think I have any special sexual endowments. I have been with women and sex was not enjoyable. It depends on who I'm with and how we feel about each other, and on being patient and willing to hang together until we find our rhythm. Since early 2005, I have had sex with one woman, one time - Biker Chick. She showed me I wasn't totally dead, yet. I was introduced by someone telling her I might be able to help her with a legal situation. The angels work in mysterious ways indeed.

As for my threat, or threats, probably it was threats, to have someone bumped off whose behavior I felt justified a wet work solution. If this chicken shit dirt bag thinks I meant that literally, then that's about as sophomoric as it gets. But then, I really did mean it literally, in the get bumped off spiritually sense. As in, the angels swoop in and hammer the chicken shit dirt bag, making him feel bumped off. Sure, sometimes I feel like cold-cocking someone. Who doesn't? Sure, sometimes I even say I felt like cold-cocking someone. But it would be real bad sophomoric to actually do it physically. So I cold-cock chicken shit dirt bags with words. When, note, the angels authorize it.

I live in mortal terror of angelic retribution, if I screw up a writing or speaking assignment. I poll the angels in several ways before I haul off and clobber somebody with words. This low life chicken shit dirt bag's wife is dead right about him being an idiot, He has no clue what holds me accountable, even though I mention and even name it from time to time in posts: Jesus, Archangel Michael, the angels Melchizedek. The Holy Spirit. God. And sometimes I describe their hammerings of my body and soul.

As for my vulgarities and violent behavior in public, I admit freely and gleefully to sometimes cussing in public situations. If the chicken shit dirt bag has other vulgarities in mind, perhaps he should state them.

Was my threatening to drop trow(?) at a candidate forum a vulgarity? Was my promoting nude beaches for Key West, and even the Keys, a vulgarity? Was my jumping the bones of the President of the Marathon Chamber of Commerce for her sneak attack on Amendment 4 at a candidate forum the Chamber was hosting in the Marathon Government Center on County television a vulgarity? Was my steadfast clobbering of The Princess of No Name Key and The Pussy of Islamorada a vulgarity? I need to know what this chicken shit dirt bag's definition of vulgarity is, before I can give a sensible answer to his allegation.

However, for the life of me, I can't remember any nearly violent physical behavior in public since I nearly beat up a kayaker for nearly causing me to have a bad accident on the Ocoee River in east Georgia, circa 1984. I did walk into a race riot once at Coffee Plantation in Key West, maybe a month after Hurricane Wilma waltzed through, and risked getting killed, to haul the two white owners back into the store, after they were getting pummeled on the way to death by a horde of enraged black teens, male and female alike. Then, I walked back on the front porch into the enraged horde's midst and started saying, "You don’t want to be doing this, please stand down," over and over, until they left the premises.

I just happened along at that moment. Yeah, it was an accident, I just happened along. Yeah, wrong. It was arranged by the angels, just as it was arranged by the angels for me to get abducted by Biker Chick. Just as it was arranged by the angels for the chicken shit dirt bag to write to you, so you could write nasty back to him and then share that with me, so I could respond.

I can't help but wonder, from what the chicken shit dirt bag wrote, if his wife wishes someone would bump him off? I also can't help but wonder, since I seem to provoke him so much, if maybe he needs to grow up and tell you to put his name and email address on his "humorous attempts to point out when he [Sloan] crosses the line." Then, the stupid mother f**ker could get his Sloan "pokes" on the CT. Then, he would not have to complain to you about editing him out and not controlling me properly in the sandbox. Or, maybe he prefers playing in the sandbox, while his wife pines for a real man to play in her box. You betcha. I did not intend to be mocking. I meant to be revelatory.

Here's a line out of yesterday's corpus delicti, cussing & treason – Osama bin Laden legacy post, which was forwarded to me by State Attorney Dennis Ward, who says he reads all of my posts. I wouldn't bet much wampum the angels didn't have Dennis send it to me, for me to swim it up this stupid mother f**ker's seriously anal retentive two-year-old ass. His poor wife. Surely, by now, she has achieved sainthood for not killing the idiot with her very own bare hands.

"Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer." Mark Twain

Well, darn if Eve didn’t drop by out of nowhere last night and chat me up.  Fat chance me telling anything about that. She said she would kill me if I did. And write about me. And I bet some of you are wondering if it was a dream, or if it happened when I was awake, or if I made it up. Frankly, my Deer, I don’t give a damn if you believe it or not . And unlike President Obama, I am not going to say any more about it.

Happy Mother’s Day. May my poor Puritan-tormented mother finally rest in peace. Of me, she often said to me, “Only a mother could love it.”

There also is a bit today about the political circus President Obama and his cohorts are making of bagging Osama bin Laden in today's harangue, including what for me was a shocking video of General Wesley Clark explaining the Bushes' plan to invade seven Middle Eastern countries in five years.

You can see and read all about it by clicking on this link: vile, vulgar & sophomoric – national & local