Sunday September 30, 2007

I wonder how many books will be in the Bush Library they create after he leaves office?

Kudos for the great banners that have been on display, here's a great idea:  How about having a contest to pick the best one and then give a free subscription to the Coconut Telegraph to the winner as a prize?  I'll bet the "Bush in real trouble" poster will enter. Duh.

[pervert caught] A school resource deputy arrested a Sugarloaf Key man on a list of charges Thursday, including failing to register as a sex offender.  Meanwhile, the Monroe County Sheriff's Office was searching Friday for two other sex offenders who failed to provide their current addresses.  School Resource Deputy Sonya Morgan said she was working in a school zone in front of Sugarloaf School at 2:30 p.m. Thursday when she saw 39-year-old William Earl Bower drive past her patrol car in a Dodge pickup.  She recognized him and knew he was wanted on outstanding warrants, so she pulled behind him and turned on her lights and siren, said sheriff's spokeswoman Becky Herrin. Bower allegedly refused to stop until he reached a driveway on Loggerhead Lane; Morgan arrested him when he got out of his truck. 

Major Kudos to Deputy Morgan. Thank you for looking out for our children on a daily basis. I cannot thank you enough for your sharp eye and getting this guy off the streets. Thank you, thank, thank you!

All the deer come from Big Pine. They swim from island to island often. The deer on Little Palm swim there because there's fresh water there (a big freshwater lake called a swimming pool) and lots of food (exotic flowering flora). The poster who saved the deer offshore did the right thing saving a deer's life. The deer probably got caught in a fast current and probably would have drowned.

Ha, ha, ha, all you little fools who voted for the democrat party and now  find that corrupt socialist Hillary, Obama and the Breck girl say that we will be in Iraq at least until 2013.What say you now little sheeple?

I was trying to get my RCA CD player fixed because it is part of a entertainment center and plays through the speakers. At the end of the cord from the player to the receiver is a plug about 1 inch wide. I can't find any like that.

[Socialized farmers] Since 1970 we paid $570 billion to farmers in the form of subsidies. What’s the point? Are we still in the Great Depression? That’s a bunch of baloney. What will happen if we stop subsidizing farmers? Will they stop growing stuff? I think not. We could use that money better by buying me a new truck. That would have just about the same effect on our food supply. We don’t subsidize beef, pork or poultry and farmers still grow those critters.

[Jumbo Derringer] Hey Friend, that thing is awesome! What kind of warped-minded gunsmith created a thing like that? Who has the wrist to fire a thing like that, King Kong? I have fired a Ma Duce, a Barret .50, and a Boys AT. All of them had a very healthy recoil. But they were heavy, and other than the Browning MG, they were braced against my shoulder. I can't imagine how one could even hold onto it at the moment if firing.

You Liberal folks who accuse all Conservatives of hating Ms. Hillary are wrong.  There are a great many of us who thank the Lord for putting her on the planet and in the race for the throne.  The race and her candidacy provide the world with a gaping window to her soul and to the souls of those who share her philosophy.  Forget for a moment her stance on Socialized Medicine.  Set aside her belief that Government knows better then you about raising and educating your children.   Ignore her commitment to reshape our values and lifestyles through taxation.  Try for a moment to get your mind around her new idea that every child born in the USA should be given a $5K bond at birth.  She floated that idea Friday at a forum.  She said that the bonds should be held until the child was 18, then the proceeds “could” be used for education.  Please, please I beg you, don’t take this at my word, and check it out!  In consideration of the limited space on this site, I won’t even begin to voice my criticism of this scary idea of hers.  But, you’ve got to marvel at the incredible level of disdain she demonstrates toward black persons.  She clearly demonstrated her disdain in her choice of platforms for floating her “plan”, she chose the Congressional Black Caucus forum.

She didn’t talk about her plan for world peace, her plan to make America safer, or her stance on environmental issues.  Nope, she talked about taking away other peoples’ money, and giving it away.  Now why do you suppose she chose that particular forum?  Can it be that she believes that black votes and souls can be bought for “free” money?

[Birthday catch 22] It's not that simple. If there are 69 people in a room, there is a greater than 99.9% chance that at least two people will share a birthday. For more information than you may possibly want to know on this subject go to  http://leaver.org/noca/birthday/other.html Warning: Not for the mathematically challenged.

[Bush in real trouble now]  This poster claims that President Bush is giving nuke fuel to the N. Koreans.  I refuse to stoop to name calling, but I most seriously urge the poster to seek professional help, or maybe that he get new glasses with less pink coloring.  I’ve checked the NY Times and other sources and can find no mention of any U.S. delivery of nuclear fuel to the N. Koreans.  There is plenty of ink around about our commitment to provide them with heavy fuel oil in exchange for their dismantling of their nuke program.  I can find no mention of nuke fuel going to the N. Koreans.  C’mon pal, you can do better than that. Prove me wrong. 

The US National Transportation Safety Board recently divulged that they had for the past five years covertly funded a project with US auto makers whereby the auto makers installed black boxes in four-wheel drive pickup trucks in an effort to determine, in fatal accidents, the circumstances in the last 15 seconds before the crash. They were surprised to find in 43 of the 50 states that the last words of drivers in 61.2 percent of fatal crashes were, "Oh, Shit!" Only the states of Mississippi, Missouri, Arkansas, Oklahoma, Alabama, Texas and Florida were different, where over 89.3 percent of the final words were: "Hold my beer and watch this."

[Are You Ronin billboard] Generally these will stay up until the next advertiser rents the space.  So even if the RONIN advertiser only rented the space for a few months or so, it will remain until a new advertiser rents the space, or it falls down.

I would assume that the rates for that particular board are higher than anyone really wants to spend, hence the reason your are still Ronin.

If you are in a room with 22 people, chances are there is a free buffet.

This is similar to Groundhog Day movie. The same thing over, and over, and… YouTube - sliding doberman

To the guy who has the hots for the girl with tattoo's at the Key Deer Bar.  You sound really creepy.

Who said the poster that mentioned Republicans "spinning facts" was a man?

Thanks to all of you who let me know that I made an error on the date for the event at the Marathon Band Shell.  The correct info is:

Sunday, October 7th at 1:15 PM   Boot Key Bivouac Veterans Benefit at the Marathon Community Park Amphitheater, mile marker 49.

This is a benefit for the returning soldiers from Iraq. There will be live music all day with a host of wonderful performers.  The Mile Marker 24 Band takes the stage at 1:15 PM. See you there!   Bulletin Board

To the women who lost her male friend.  Wives or girlfriends don't like their men to have female friends. So back off! 

Tonight, starting at 5 p.m. at Pier House on Front Street, Art Behind Bars hosts its annual showing, get-together, with food and drink. Lynne Vantriglia heads up this very worthwhile project, which is having success bringing inmates into artistic expression, which, in turn, is leading them toward living in harmony with people and life and away from what put them behind bars in the first place. I have several beautiful pieces of inmate art that I purchased from earlier Art Behind Bars events for a very reasonable price. All proceeds from inmate art go to the program, the inmates’ way of paying for the help they are getting. Sometimes private artists also are featured. GoodMorningKeyWest.com

[thyroid issues] I don't know much about this problem, but can I ask how you knew you had a thyroid problem?

[dumbing down of America] Typical reply to a general subject. Why the hell do people always blame a political party for something? It is you who are dumbing down Americans by trying to blame others. Dumbing down is mostly done by marketers and CEOs for more profit from nitwits who cannot make a sound decision about anything.  

I was wondering if anyone knows of a swim club for young kids in the lower keys area?

The historical record is filled with all sorts of abuses that I don't think we should repeat. Sweat shops, child labor, impure foods and drugs and the grinding poverty of the working class all were common during the Gilded Age. But I don't think that is any reason to adopt them again. American voters should not be expected to roll over. If we expect nothing from government, why do we bother with elections and why do we pay taxes?

It is our personal responsibility to demand responsive government. If we don't like the nanny state then we need to do something about it.

For the gun people:  www.gunthings.com

I think animal activists are a unique subspecies that should be studied.

This is the entrance to my house in Dömsöd, Hungary. The sign reads, “This house is for sale. I am escaping from this trashy government."  I hope that I have a buyer soon. Next year at this time I hope to be soaking up the rays on the beach, and let the Hungarians suffer--they like it.

Yesterday I forgot to mention that Injade will also be performing at Dante's in Key West today (Sunday) from 1:30-5:30pm. Come on out for the afternoon and enjoy good food and drinks by their beautiful pool while we play for you.

[tasering of a student at a John Kerry speech] It's considered one of the most pleasant outcomes of attending a John Kerry speech. Many people, from what I've seen, choose to be tasered, and many people bring their own tasers to Kerry's speeches hoping either to stay awake, or, erase the memory.

We never have mold since we found out about (?)Golden Rods.

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Sunday September 30, 2007

Saturday September 29, 2007

Bush is in real trouble now. After the republicans screamed their little heads off about Clinton giving nuclear fuel to the N. Koreans to stop their program they raised holy hell and guess what, it seems Bush is doing the exact same thing now.

You’ve got to love it. Give him hell, conservatives.  Let’s hear your outrage. I bet you sit like quiet little sheep now when Gog Bush does it.

I love the new logo for kudos & whiners on Friday's column!  Ed, please keep this one a while. Nice job, Dan.

Well, it's a long story, but I'm back in the keys. I made 2 hospital visits while visiting my kids in NJ and just got out of Mariner hospital in Tavernier in the keys. I am now home in the keys.

[Dumbing down] You’re damned right we're being dumbed down!  We’re being dumbed down by an educational system that encourages teaching to the slowest child in the class so as not to “hurt their feelings”, this while boring the more accomplished students.  We’re being dumbed down by a mass media industry that presents a single viewpoint of the news, that view point promulgated by the Democratic National Committee or it’s new master, MoveOn.org.  We’re being dumbed down by politicians who try their level best to convince you that all your troubles are the fault of someone else.  Our "dumbed downedness" sure seems to be proving itself as more and more of us look to someone else to solve our problems.  Far too many of us fall into the “Nanny trap”.  If you’ve got a problem just call on “Nanny Guv’ment” and she’ll kiss you, give you a hug, take something from someone else to give to you and make you feel all better.  After all, you’re just a poor dummy who can’t get along without “Nanny Guv’ment” taking care of you.  Yesterday, the “dumbing down” poster accused Conservative posters of “spinning” facts.  It’s interesting and a it’s a real spotlight on the intellect of this poster that he fails to present any facts or documentation in support of his claim that other posters are “spinning” facts.

[I only like to be frisked by Cops]  They do it real good.  I went to Farvilla to buy a cop uniform, but they only made them for women and I am hetero and only like men.  So, I will have to get one from a Police Store for the Mister Right.  My mom liked police too.  She used to speed in her 'hood hoping that motorcycle policeman with the boots would stop her, but he never did.  After she pointed him out, I started speeding too and he would just smile and wave.  Lots of chicks dig cops and I hear they have a high divorce rate because of all the flesh that's thrown at them. Next time Boondocks has that Police Show, it would be fun to get frisked for charity but someone would start a lawsuit.  Another fun parlor game would be to conduct the roadside sobriety test while you're drunk and have a designated driver.  Wear your policeman uniform down at Fantasy Fest and the girls will flash you.  I guess if I do that to a real policeman then I will get that frisking after all.

If you try to fail and succeed, which have you done?

We do not stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing. 

[Thyroid Issues] I have about ten plus years in the hypothyroid world. (Was diagnosed as "hypothyroid" sometime in the 90's, and I'm an RN with an extensive background. So I know a little.) First things first: You need to find out all you can from your doctor, regarding your thyroid levels, what tests they ran, etc. There are three tests that are run (generally): TSH (thyroid stimulating hormone) which is generally regarded as the diagnostic for thyroid disorders. The thyroid is sluggish in hypothyroidism. Because of that, the brain (this is the simple explanation) sends more "TSH" to the thyroid, to stimulate it to work. The less the thyroid responds, the more hormone the brain puts out. That's why you have an elevated TSH when your thyroid is underactive, and vice-versa. The other two tests, T3 and T4, reveal just how much the thyroid is functioning. In hypothyroidism, generally those numbers are low, or low to normal (which means that your thyroid, which is responsible for your metabolism, is not doing the job, or is just barely doing it). "Synthroid" (usually prescribed in hypothyroidism) is a synthetic version of thyroxine (T4), called "levothyroxine sodium". Among its adverse reactions listed are irritability, nervousness, increased appetite, insomnia, excessive sweating, and palpitations. Your heart rate may be fast, you may feel tired, and you may have loose stool regularly. Sound familiar?

Because of all that (and I was nervous, all the time) I did a really dumb thing. I tried to wean myself off the stuff, and what resulted could probably have killed me. I could have gone into what is called "myxedema coma". My TSH was 117!  That is fairly astronomical. Anyway, what I found is a product called "Armour Thyroid". It is not synthetic, it is dessicated pork thyroid. What it apparently does is treat T3 more than the Synthroid does, and for that reason it produces little or no anxiety. So I asked the doc about it, and he was familiar with it. He started me on it, and I have noticed a big difference. I feel much more normal. No feeling like a deer in headlights anymore. I'm still in the process of being regulated. It does not happen overnight. So, go talk to your doctor, and ask him about changing to Armour Thyroid. It shouldn't be a problem, and you will most likely feel a lot better in a few weeks.

Watch the alcohol intake - you'll have a bigger problem. I did the same thing - self medicated to take away the "heebie-jeebies". Not the way to go. Let me know how you make out. - msmrn52@comcast.net.

A Suffolk golfer has just hit his third hole-in-one--at the age of eight! David Huggins sunk his latest ace with a nine-iron on a 105-yard seventh hole. It was his first hole-in-one during a competition. In 2003, David became the youngest Brit to get an ace at age four. His second came in 2005. Tiger Woods got his first hole-in-one at age six.

The dog I found Thursday night on Key Deer Blvd. near the ball field has been reunited with her family.  A happy ending! 

I will never complain about my kids again.

[pepper-spray filled paintballs]  Oh, wow, nice touch!  I wish I'd had that gadget about a week ago, but better late than never.

I remember a bunch of years ago buying a cordless phone (so cheap it was a rotary dial, not even using tones) for about $10.95.  It had a “lifetime guarantee”.  If anything went wrong, I was to send it back to the company for repair or replacement.  All I had to do was package and “include $14.95 to cover shipping and handling”.

If, we the people, don't stand up for our rights and save our paradise, the junta and their developer friends will drive us into the sea!  Get to these meetings. Protest the monsters who want to turn our area into ghettos and low-rent dumps before it's too late. They will drive down our values to a penny on the dollar, then what?

The whole game is to push the low renters from the Key West - Stock Island areas up to the Lower Keys, because those Key West areas have deep water, and deep water means big boating, which means rich people and more taxable income for the junta. It is a game politicos and real estates have played many times, but this time they are taking away your homes and your Paradise! Fight back or loose your dream!  Make them put everything to a public vote on a separate ticket. After all, it is our lives and values they are playing with. Also, note their time frame syncs with Snowbird season.

Why do we still have to look at the Are You Ronin billboard?  What the hell is it and what company is paying for such idiocy? Kudos to the person who managed to climb up there and duct tape YES. Maybe now it will come down.

[Talk About Humility] There was a one hour interview on CNBC with Warren Buffet, the second richest man who has donated $31 billion to charity. Here are some very interesting aspects of his life: 1. He bought his first share of stock at age 11 and he now regrets that he started too late! 2. He bought a small farm at age 14 with savings from delivering newspapers. 3. He still lives in the same, small 3-bedroom house in midtown Omaha , that he bought after he got married 50 years ago. He says that he has everything he needs in that house. His house does not have a wall or a fence. 4. He drives his own car everywhere and does not have a driver or security people around him. 5. He never travels by private jet, although he owns the world's largest private jet company. 6. His company, Berkshire Hathaway, owns 63 companies. He writes only one letter each year to the CEOs of these companies, giving them goals for the year. He never holds meetings or calls them on a regular basis. He has given his CEO's only two rules. Rule number 1: Do not lose any of your shareholder's money. Rule number 2: Do not forget rule number 1. 7. He does not socialize with the high society crowd. His pastime after he gets home is to make himself some popcorn and watch television.         

Don't you just hate it when someone from your workplace is sick, really sick, and comes in anyway, coughing and touching everything the healthy people have to touch, contaminating the air the healthy people have to breathe and all the work tools and workspaces? 

Key Deer swim from island to island quite regularly.  The one in question apparently just got lost.

Saturday, September 29 Mercury is at greatest elongation, 26° east of the Sun in the sunset glow.

[For the person with Thyroid Issues] The answer is mostly hormones.  There are some good websites out there.  Look at www.WilsonsSyndrome.com  I had problems for years, then I went to a doctor who checks your hormone levels and prescribes compound bi-identical hormones.  What a difference!  Read up on it and either go to your local doctor with a print out of the info or go to one of the doctors Dr. Wilson recommends.  Good luck.

[If you are in a room with 22 other people] If so, you probably are an illegal alien.

What happened to Classic Carpet?

Hey everyone, Injade is back at the Looe Key Tiki Bar tonight for a Saturday evening fun party for all. We look forward to seeing you all there!

Nice CT banner, Dan!  I love the BP Grind. 

The Florida Keys Dragon Boat Club is putting a team together for the South Florida Dragon Boat Festival October 13-14^th. We need competitors! The event is being held at the Haulover Park in North Miami. There are special room rates at an area hotel. Call for more information 305-304-5100 Bulletin Board

The lady who lost her dog, Molly in Eden Pines was on Biz Baz Friday morning, and the person who found her is on BPK.com Friday too! It can’t get any better than that and that eight year old gets the dog back. I love a happy ending.

They say it's your birthday,
It's my birthday too yeah,
They say it's your birthday,
We're gonna’ have a good time,
I'm glad it's your birthday…Happy birthday to you.

Happy birthday Gene Michaels, Hope your birthday bash is as good as mine. Love you, Theresa Bright

[key deer and Little Palm] It’s not very far. Probably about 30 to 50 feet to Cooks Island and as seen in the last few days on this site the deer can swim quite a distance when the need arises. The deer on Little Palm come from Cooks Island. I probably shouldn't go any further with this because some old timer will blow me out of the water. But that’s my story and I'm sticking to it!

The low flying plane at around 4a.m. was the Monroe County Air Force aka Mosquito Control.

Excuse me? All my friends help me move furniture. But my real friends help me move bodies.

For the person on thyroid medicine.  Have you tried reducing the dose?

[.44 Magnum] That just shoots BBs.  Now here's a personal protection piece for men!

They want cork, give them cork and a cork sucker!    Video

[other way to fight mold] Keep a low wattage light bulb on. Mold cannot grow in lighted areas.

Regarding your well constructed and thought out rant on the dumbing down of America by people not of your political persuasion. In this case I believe you are referring to idiot conservatives. Is it true that you expect to give us idiots all your opinions? And if we even attempt to give a rebuttal we are to be cast as know-nothings? It seems to me to smell pretty much of typical liberal arrogance. When I say arrogance you should know I am being kind.

In the news today it was reported that President Bush told news reporters during a visit to an elementary school Thursday that "Childrens do learn". Man, the guys hilarious at best. How was he ever taken seriously?

Barry Gibson, a city commission candidate works in the heart of Key West, knows its pulse. We agreed that all of Key West is important, but we also agreed how important Duval and Whitehead Streets and Mallory Pier are to the life of Key West. Without them, the City would not be able to look after the rest of the City. Without the economic engine Duval and Whitehead Streets and Mallory Pier are, Key West would be like a car without an engine; pretty, but it wouldn’t go anywhere. Translated, if you want to turn Key West into a pretty car without an engine, turn Duval and Whitehead Streets and Mallory Pier into something more like the rest of Key West. Say, North Roosevelt. Say, New Town. Say, hmmm, a place people who go to Disney World also would like to take in before going back to wherever it is they live. GoodMorningKeyWest.com

[Birthday catch 22] For the odds to reflect the accuracy of your statement you would have to be in a room with 365 other persons for there to statistically be another to have the same birthday as yourself.

[Conservative fairy tale]  Once upon a time in a land not so far away there was a Conservative little girl named Little Red Riding Hood.  She was called “Little Red” because she was a little Conservative girl.  She was called “Riding Hood” because taxes and environmental rules made it too expensive to buy or operate a car, so she rode a bike.  And every real Liberal person knows that every Conservative person, even a little girl, is evil and must be a criminal, and, it is a rule that Liberal persons must call Conservative persons nasty names.  That’s how this pretty little Conservative girl became a “Hood”.  So, Little Red walked through the environmentally enhanced carbon footprint mitigated rain forest.  She was going to visit her Conservative grandmother, who was very sick because she had been waiting for the mandatory 2 months to see a mandatory Universal Health Care doctor.  When she got to Granny’s comfy little cottage that Gramps and Granny built with hard work and investments, she found the door was open.  Little Red looked inside and found a huge blue and gray donkey in Granny’s bed, the donkey was humping Granny and braying “Give me more money, Hansel and Gretel are poor children, they need your money and your cottage more than you”.  Poor old Granny was helpless against this braying greedy beast, she was so weak she couldn’t resist--poor old Granny was being screwed.  Little Red screamed, and pulled a sharp pointed stylus she had found in an old voting machine from her little basket. She ran up to the Braying Blue Beast, she stuck the stylus in the Right ear of the Beast.  She pushed and pushed and pushed, soon the Blue Beast began to shrink and a nasty brown fluid gushed from his ear, it flowed and flowed.  Little Red pulled Granny from beneath the beast, and Granny gave a wan smile, she said “Little Red, what is that nasty smell”?  Little Red smiled, gave a little Red blush and said “It’s bullshit Granny, all liberal bullshit”.  They lived moderately happy ever after.

[heavy plane flying east at 4am] It flew 2 tight circles from the tower in the prison out to US1. It had red, white and blue flashing lights on it also. It must have been painted dark because I tried to see it thru binoculars and couldn't make out a distinct outline.

A real friend walks in when everyone else is leaving!

[Halo 3] To the lady whose kids just got Halo 3, If they're interested in playing against someone local, have them add the gamer tag: HoKeys to their friends list. That's my name, and I'm always looking for someone new to play against.

Calling an illegal alien an undocumented immigrant is like calling a drug dealer an unlicensed pharmacist.

Those who hammer their guns into plows will plow for those who do not.   ~ Thomas Jefferson

An armed man is a citizen.  An unarmed man is a subject. A gun in the hand is better than a cop on the phone.

[Ted Nugent for President] Wouldn’t that be cool?  In the interim the next best thing is Fred Thompson.

I tried to get Gallo Wines to make it again, but no way!  Ripple was the first real wine cooler back in the 60s and it sure did wash down the VO and Buds good.

There is a Ripple cult on the web. They have been trying to get a good picture of a Ripple Bottle for years. The only known picture of a red Ripple bottle was the shot of Fred Sanford standing in front of his bar in his movie set house.

An empty Ripple bottle with the label sells for $100 to $800, and a full (who would dare drink it?) bottle sells for over $1500 and up. The original Ripple bottle was red with a simple label, without the fruit and wavy label cut. Yeah, Ripple!

If you cannot take anyone seriously because they make a typo, then you must really hate George Bush. The man speaks alien.

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Saturday September 29, 2007

Friday September 28, 2007

[Today’s Coconut Telegraph banner] Alrightey, here's the logo I promised you. I'm hoping it came through okay. I bumped up the resolution so it's clear enough; as my 'toons sometimes get a bit fuzzy by the time they get on the site.  I also made it a decent size so you might not have to increase or decrease the dimensions. Hopefully you'll like it. I have some other, simpler ideas that I'll send you someday when I get some time, but this is what was in my head.

Hope you've been checking out the new strip in the Conch Color!   ~Dan Schwab

[Cork] I’m not a wine drinker, but I do have some common sense. Wouldn’t something seal better if it had a mechanical contraption on it rather then a porous wooden plug pushed in to keep the air out?

A cork is certainly more romantic and it does convey the illusion that you know what you’re talking about. It also shows you’re not cheap. Hey, whatever it takes!

[Michael Vick] A Canadian bank has sued suspended Atlanta Falcons quarterback Michael Vick for more than $2.3 million, arguing that his guilty plea to federal dogfighting charges -- and the resulting impact on his career -- have prevented him from repaying a loan. Can we say karma?

[CD player could be repaired at a reasonable rate] I commend you for saving the world, but there is no “reasonably” rate to fix a fifty dollar machine. It would cost more to fix than to buy a new one plus the hassle involved and it would probably break again shortly thereafter. It’s too bad, but only love is meant to last.

[Mould without A/C] I don’t think the mould is harmful because the Crackers had lived her for hundreds of years without A/C and the mould didn’t bother them. We’re too wimpy these days, especially with anti-bacterial soap, etc. No one needed all that stuff throughout modern history and mankind seems to have thrived.

Does anyone have thyroid issues where the medication makes you bounce off walls?  I would love to know everything, especially holistic cures.  My brain is fuzzy, I am very bitchy, hungry, tired and the doctor told me that I cannot buy a new thyroid.  I hate to say it, but alcohol seems to be a good medicine.  “Thank you for any info you may have”, said the hypo-monster from the woods in Big Pine.

If you are in a room with 22 other people, at least two of those people will have the same birthday.

I love reading conservative fairy tales when they try and justify invading a country that had nothing to do with 9/11.They will spin facts to the point that  all you can do is just poke yourself in the ear with a pencil so you can save any sense of reasoning you have left. It’s also less painful. Listening to conservatives talk is proof positive that America’s dumbing down is almost complete. Watch how one of them will now say "No it’s not. It’s the liberal’s fault". Keep your pencils close.

If they are highly evolved conservatives they will blame Hillary. Or even better bring up the subject of taxes. Watch them. Oh, yeah, and everyone’s a Socialist.

[Medicaid fraud] You folks who complain about the sky high costs of everything here in the Keys should consider a career move.  With a little ingenuity you could rip off the ideas of two dudes in Brooklyn (Singer and Rubenstein).  These entrepreneurs made over $12,000,000 by simply over billing Medicaid.  The only down side is that they got caught and went to jail.  But it sure looks like most crooks who rip off Medicaid and the other tax paid medical programs don’t get caught.  Gov Charlie Crist, when he was Attorney General in 2004, said that Medicaid fraud alone costs Florida taxpayers over one billion dollars per year.

[A Band of Brothers] "For those who shed his blood with me today, will be my brother for ever"  If you have never seen Ronald McDonald in battledress, that's me on the left with the Dutch boy hair.

[Democratic Debate] Did you hear the “skrrch, skrrrrch” sound of heads being scratched, did you hear the muted shrieks of  “What the freak is goin’ on?” coming from the homes of our many Democrat friends the other night as they listened to the Donkey Dialog aka the Democratic Debate? 

The top rung Democratic Presidential candidates no longer promise that they will cut and run from Iraq if they’re elected.  That change of position is a huge digital salute to the ultra left wing of the Democrat party.  I’ve got to admit that it took a lot of courage and maybe more than a modicum of principle to take the leap.  I have no idea why the change, perhaps it is a new reading of the polls which suggest that the majority of Americans feel that our security is the single most important factor in the race.  Perhaps some or all of the top-rungers have received some sort of information or briefing as to the real threat that we face at the hands of the fundamentalists.  Perhaps it is simple patriotism bubbling up.  Whatever the reason is, I applaud each of them, and I won’t shout that they are flip-flopping, (at least not yet).

The single most striking change in American life during the past twenty years is the redistribution of income from the working and middle class to the rich.  It is not an act of God or even the inevitable workings of capitalism.  It is caused by deliberate government tax policies.

Unbelievable! Is this real?  Do the deer really swim that far?  How do they get the deer on Little Palm Island?

Today, Friday, September 28.  Another sign of fall: the Great Square of Pegasus is now high in the eastern sky in early evening, balancing on one corner. Tonight it's far upper right of the Moon.

Did anyone hear that heavy plane flying east over the keys early this morning around 4am? It was too low, but had it’s lights on so I don’t think it was a drug smuggler.

[invention of the year] I have one of these I carry to the allergist's office when I have to go for shots.  One annoying woman invariably turns on her soaps, then tells each character (loudly) how to live their lives.  I sit as far from her as possible and use this magnificent little gadget from behind a magazine to mute/change channels/switch off, till she gives up, cursing the cable company, and then settles for a magazine.  It really makes the time fly!   TVgo

So now the Habitat Center will not only be competing with the building material folks, but with the clothing stores as well.

I've heard a few stories about how Knockemdown Key got its name.  The one I've heard the most is that locals used to make a sport out of clubbing pelicans.  Whoever knocked the most pelicans down from the trees was the winner.

I hope Capt Dan will still let the girls cool their snatch for $10 like the sign said when I drove through a couple of weeks ago. I was looking forward to checking that out. And I hope that hot Little tattooed gal will still be working there; yummy.

Ted Nugent for president!

[CD player needing repair] I respectfully disagree with the poster who suggested throwing the old one away and purchasing a new one. ]

That's all well and good that you don't want it to end up in an already full landfill, but let's seriously look at what the "cost," would be to fix your malfunctioning CD player.  The average cost of a CD player is under $50.

First: You will not find anyone in the keys, commercially, who fixes CD players.  Look underneath the CD player.  There's a notice there that says, "No user serviceable parts inside."  This means there are no "spare parts," nor will any commercial electronics shop here have any parts that will go with your machine.  As there are countless models out there, no one will have specific training on your individual player. So, now we move on…

Second: With no one in the keys who can fix it, you've got two options:  (1) Ship it away to the manufacturer, which is most likely in Korea, Japan or Taiwan.  Any guess what the cost will be to ship your CD player?   (2) You could try to track down a "repair shop" up on the mainland, but you'd still either need to ship it up, or drive it up then wait for them to order parts (refer to "parts" above,) and then have it shipped back to you.

Yes, we are a wasteful society, but what you have is a bunch of plastic parts along with a few bits of wire and chips.  In lieu of a landfill or trashing it, I suppose you could try finding a place that would recycle any parts worth using again,  but I don’t' see any companies offering that.  If you don't want to trash it, hide it away in your attic for someone to find decades from now, so they can take it on Antiques Roadshow. 

In the meantime, spend less than $30 and just get a new one.

Any World of Warcraft peeps out there? I have two LVL70 hunters on Dentarg. One hunter is Marksman and the other is Beast Master. Long live the Alliance!

[dog runs loose and craps and plays wherever they like]  It is illegal to have a loose pet, let it crap anywhere but your own property. Both are $100 fines. Call the cops!

Boy, I saw Bruce Springsteen on Today today. He and the E Street Band performed for almost the whole show. Wow, and I don’t even like him. He’s a star!

[Shortage of cork] You can bet if there is a shortage of corks, the fine wines will get them first, leaving the screw caps (made of whatever) for the street wines.

Hey guys and gals with the rusty fridges. Go to Home Depot, Ace or your favorite hardware store and ask for Ospfo metal treatment.  It comes in a clear plastic quart jug and the liquid is slightly bluish in color.  You can also buy a product at the auto parts called One Step and it also is a primer.  Do not sand the appliance, brush on the Ospfo or One Step and wait 8 hours it will turn all the rust black. Then go over it with two coats (if white stuff appears sand it off and reapply Ospfo and let dry) of the Rustoleum appliance color and that spot will not rust again! 

Do this once every year or two if you see rust appearing and it will stop rust in its tracks.  We use the stuff by the gallon on the farm when refurbishing older machinery and it makes the paint last longer than when new.  Happy restoring!

Is the person willing to pay more to be frisked at the Ramrod swimming hole a female?  If so, when do you go?  I'll frisk you for free.  Ed, if you want to put my email address with this feel free.

We can't find Bin Laden because he's busy playing golf in Florida! 

[Found dog] At approximately 6:15pm last night (Thursday, 9/27), I found a small to mid-size dog running down Key Deer Blvd. near the ball field.  She is approximately 25 lbs, mainly black with some brown and white, and very sweet.  She was wearing a blue harness and a "shirt".  I will call in to BizBaz Friday AM, so hopefully, by the time this is posted, she will be back with her owners.  If not, please call 872-1473. Classified Ads > Lost & Found

Now this is a gun! Taurus Ultra-lite .44 Magnum.

The other way to fight mold is to keep your home open all of the time. Mold does not have a chance to grow where air is allowed to circulate. My home was built in 1955, has never had air-conditioning, and there is not a trace of mold in it.

Anti-Hillary. http://hytaipan.home.comcast.net:80/media/serenity2.html

[Lost Cargo] I had the most delicious boiled peanuts today. Great job guys; keep up the good work.

A seagull in Scotland has developed the habit of stealing chips from a neighborhood shop. The seagull waits until the shopkeeper isn't looking, and then walks into the store and grabs a snack-size bag of cheese Doritos. Once outside, the bag gets ripped open and shared by other birds. The seagull's shoplifting started early this month when he first swooped into the store in Aberdeen, Scotland, and helped himself to a bag of chips. Since then, he's become a regular. He always takes the same type of chips. Customers have begun paying for the seagull's stolen bags of chips because they think it's so funny!

[Spray on condom] It has been banned in all of Europe and was never imported to the US. It seems people tried it but couldn't get it off!  Hazardous chemicals are to blame. Ouch!

[Ruger Redhawk] That's one nice gun, friend. I had one of those myself. I would call the Redhawk “hand artillery”. The photo is a captured Chinese mortar that I used with French bombs. Max. range is 1200 meters. Like Joe Piscopo said, "This thing shoots through schools".

[dog runs loose] That's a great idea, in fact they even make pepper-spray filled paintballs so Fido can run home and share it's experience with it's owner.

Oxy-Clinton   Video

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Friday September 28, 2007