Wednesday February 28, 2007

[The Big Pine Neighborhood Charter School plans to grow by one grade level each year until it offers pre-kindergarten through eighth grade]

They are planning to make the charter school on Big Pine much bigger. In five years it will be double in size? Is this necessary, when they are closing down a school in Key West?  Where are the kids going to come from?  The people leaving the Keys in droves are families with children and the retirees with no children are moving in.  I cannot understand school expansion when our population of school children is dramatically dropping.  Someone who knows the score please enlighten us.  Why are there so many half empty rooms at Sugarloaf?  Are "they" planning on turning that school building into affordable housing for the teachers along with building a subdivision on school grounds that could be owned by anyone, not just teachers?  Less kids and bigger schools.  What is wrong with this picture?

[New bowling ally] The Bush administration delvers on it's promise for modernization in the middle east.

Can anyone tell me if there is a Homeowners Association for Doctors Arm?

Developers are going to build on Sugarloaf School property. That’s not right.

[Bush lied, Comrade Clinton spoke only the truth]  All politicians are a bunch of lying scumbags. Until they are all held accountable for their actions nothing will change. I think if they don't follow through on their campaign promises they should be taken out of office. Until then they will say anything to get elected. They should do time for perjury or better yet put up against the wall and shot. Maybe then we might get some honest politicians. 

[Rare form of Dementia]  A vasectomy for men then is equal to a lobotomy?  I always said a man has two heads and neither one works.

[Lousy Tech Support] Did you know that with the new Internet Explorer 7, if you hold down the Ctrl key and tap the + or _ keys the print on the screen will get larger or smaller? In the bottom right of the screen there is even a readout that tells you the size you’ve selected. This is really helpful if your eyeballs don’t work like they used too.

That Moondog video of fantasy fest was totally stupid. Was it a joke?

[Chelsea Clinton going to Iraq takes the prize for most ignorant comment] I beg to differ, The proposed graduated alcohol driving license was the most ignorant. Otherwise: “dog breath is reserved for the dog and even then, I brush its teeth (after getting all liquored-up).” Oh yah, this one's a keeper!

[Regarding Mark's 40th Birthday party] You shouldn't open your mouth if you don't know what you're talking about.  He loves his children and he works 7 days a week, 52 weeks a year to try to get your money.  Maybe if you didn't call him 50 times a day, he could get some work done.  Friends of Mark and Debbie put that party together because he is special to a lot of people.  They don't have the money to do anything like that, so his friends made sure it was a good memory of a milestone.  You'll get yours, so calm down.

Editor: Please don't put this email address as it is not mine.  You can post mine if you want.  It is: angel02496@yahoo.com.

I'm one of the guys who complained about that big hunk of crap floating in Cudjoe Bay last year.  It was unattended, poorly anchored in an area that doesn't hold anchors very well, and hurricane season was approaching.  Plus, I didn't want my beautiful bay to start looking like Christmas Tree Island from derelict boats.  I thought FWC towed it when I saw it wasn't there anymore.  Who gives a crap about a boat lien or who the owner is?  I'm just glad it's gone and not in my back yard from a storm.  What the hell are you crying about? 

Have I been married too long? Video

Fishing in Channel: We’re not supposed to, but we all do it. If a boat blows by you, he has the right to, with the exception: If he knows it could cause an accident.  Then he better slow down. I also fish the channels, but try to stay near the side to give the other boaters safe passage.

Who's "we" in "we want to see this lien so much?"  Sounds like you screwed up and can't admit it.  We have enough whiners in the Keys.  We don't need any help from Ohio.  Here's a word of advice, no one here cares about your stupid boat, much less a lien.  We have more important things to worry about, like when Dunkin Donuts is going to open on Big Pine.

What kind of crooked deal is going on at the Sugarloaf School? They are now going to build a sub-division on the property. If they can’t sell the homes to teachers then they will be sold on the open market. Who’s in bed with the developers? A teacher can move and sell their house to anyone! In the long run those homes will be market rate. The only way teacher housing will work is for the school board to wholly own the development and to rent to whomever they choose.

[Least competent criminals] Police in Lilburn, Ga., were called to the cemetery at 2:40 a.m. to investigate reports of a man screaming for about two hours. They found Ezekiel Dejesus-Rodriguez, 24, pinned under a gravestone (with a bloody, broken leg) and said he had apparently been knocking over headstones for fun until one fell on him.

I believe all RVs should be prohibited from entering the Florida Keys. These people should have to have a commercial drivers license to drive something as big as a semi tractor trailer! The bridges are way to dangerous to let little old grandpa drive the monstrous size RV backing traffic up for miles making even the calmest driver go to the brink of road rage or to pass when they normally would not. RVs should only be handled by people experienced and licensed to operate something that big and heavy. They only slow down traffic, spend the winter here every year, but pay no taxes. They take up land that could be used for affordable housing and walk around complaining and looking for an all-you-can-eat buffet or standing in the grocery store isles blocking traffic. No more RVs in the Florida Keys!

Proper protocol for passing a flats fisherman who has a charter is to get up to top speed, lower your shorts, bend over in his direction and then flip him off. The tourist and flats guide will love you for it.

Here's another fine example of a hate-ridden Yankee trying to trash our town.  The postings made yesterday about the boat in Cudjoe Bay were obviously made by the guy from Ohio, not someone sympathetic to his cause.   I'm sure he'll reply to this with multiple comments under different screen names like he has on every other Keys internet forum, posing as a local.  Hey, Yankee, the only thing news worthy to us real locals about this whole incident is the fact that the eye-sore is gone.  What makes you think we give a crap about your problems?  You should be the one in jail for polluting my water with that piece of garbage. 

And about the Blue Paper, I applaud the editor for have having the balls to report what he does.  But, anyone with any common sense knows that his stories are very opinionated and one-sided.  These are two elements to incomplete stories.

[stuck down here with a bunch of retarded yahoos] What an insensitive and offensive remark. Only about half of the yahoos down here are retarded; the rest are just plain dumb and proud of it.

[trying to find a story in archives about a derelict boat in Cudjoe] I don't think this would be the same story, but a hotel sent people to take a boat in June, but it wasn't derelict. They drove right off with it. I know because my neighbor has pictures of the whole thing. Two of his neighbors also witnessed it. I believe they drove right off into the sunset. Now that I'm thinking, if I take my boat to that same hotel and they don't feel I tipped the wait staff enough? Ok, I’ll leave the boat at home.

What are the opinions for cable TV down here? I had DISH but I don’t want to get into another contract and only want basic cable. Would someone tell me which they have found to be best?  Comcast or Direct TV or what? Just some news and weather, that’s all I need.

I don't know why the sheriff's dept. or any other law enforcement organization can't Baker Act someone. When I was a paramedic in Hialeah, whenever we needed to Baker Act someone, we called for HPD. They dropped whatever they were doing and showed up on the scene fast. That was in Dade County, but I don't think Monroe Co would be any different.

On March 13, 2007, the Monroe County School Board will vote on whether to approve a 36 unit affordable housing project on less than 2 acres of ground behind Sugarloaf School.  If built, this project will introduce many challenges, including traffic, wastewater and most importantly the element of strangers living in very close proximity to our students.  Superintendent Acevedo and at least one School Board member have already expressed tentative approval for this project to be located at Sugarloaf School.  

Two public meetings will be held on Wednesday, February 28, 2007 at 6:00 p.m. and Tuesday, March 6, 2007 at 6:00 p.m. at the Sugarloaf Media Center in which the Superintendent and School Board members will hear public comment. We strongly urge you as community members, parents and neighbors to attend and voice your opposition.

[fishing in a navigable channel] You have the right of way as long as you’re not endangering the other boat. It’s like parking in the middle of the road. Other cars have the tight of way. Screw the flats fisherman they’re mostly asses who think they are very important people.

I guess all the Chelsea Clinton posts prove that sending the Bush twins to Iraq is just ignorant and mean spirited. It’s just because they hate their parents.

Please join the Boy Scouts of Troop 573 for their last spaghetti dinner of the season.  Saturday, March 3rd. Big Pine United Methodist Church from 5:00-7:00.  All-you-can-eat spaghetti, salad, garlic bread and delicious desserts.  $8.00 for adults and $5.00 for children.  Help send a scout to summer camp. Bulletin Board

You provided an email address when you whined on 27 Feb "I had a dream last night that good for nothing Sloan’s ramblings disappeared from bigpinekey.com. It just goes to show you what a little knowledge and a lot of money can accomplish." The same day, Deer Abby posted that she dreamt that Sloan sent a gang of thugs to break her kneecap--just kidding, so she could move to Key West and write for a local newspaper. The same day, Sloan says dreams are sending him to Key West to test the political waters there--no kidding. Maybe you should open a crystal ball service, or try to fill Deer Abby's slot--just kidding. Maybe good for nothing Sloan and Dear Abby will meet for a candle-light dinner at Wendy's on Duval Street to compare kneecaps--not really kidding.

[Karmageddon] It's when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, and then the Earth explodes and it's a serious bummer.

I just went to the Square Grouper restaurant for the first time and had a great dinner. The best thing about it was that I could have as much to drink as I wanted (and I did), because I didn't have to drive home. I just called Mack at Big Pine Taxi and he picked us up right away. I just hope that people will support him so that he can stay in business. It's a great luxury to have such a valuable service in these beautiful "remote" areas up the Keys. It benefits the bars, the restaurants and the people that go there. So if you don't want your face all over the Sheriffs site call BP Taxi late at night.

Murphy's Lesser Known Laws
1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
2. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
3. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

[Some random thoughts] Regarding Al Gore's energy bill that that right wing Cyber rag the Drudge Report released. They conveniently failed to mention that Al Gore uses "Green" energy. His house has 20 rooms and offices and he uses renewable sources of energy. That's why his bill is so high. On the topic regarding the possibility of finding the remains of Jesus. Man, wouldn't that put a crimp in religion's style. That would prove once and for all that Jesus was human. Nothing more, nothing less--just human. Anna Nicole Smith would roll in her grave...if she had one. For Christ's sake, bury the poor woman already. And finally, I had the pleasure of hearing Key West Soul singer Robert Aubry perform recently.  I sure wish he'd perform at some of the venues in our area. C'mon bar owners, get on the stick and bring some Soul to Big Pine.

[To novice boater] Rules of the road say that the captain is responsible for his wake. So wake up, slow down, you swamp um u fault--big trouble. Do unto others. You know the rest.

[Unedited] after veeerry careful analyzing all by myself found we all so ignant we dont even know we ignant and i do mean all yeah baby all that means you to ignant mcnugget

Green peace. Former Mayor Jimmy Weekley said last night at Hometown PAC's "call for candidates" party in Key West that Key West needs to preserve its green spaces, its parks, wildlands, etc. Coming from a Conch in a long line of Conchs, I believe that is a really significant message, which it seems from my dreams that Mother Nature truly hopes will be taken to heart. But given the massive amount of green I was served in the dreams, it may be that Mother Nature might want even more than Jimmy asked for . . .Sloan's Space

The Mile Marker 24 Band is going to make our debut performance at The Schooner Wharf in Key West this Saturday from 3:00 until 7:00 PM. This is the annual open-air art and music festival and it should be a blast. If you are in the area you have to come party with us!

[Beware of the anti-locals businesses] I was pricing moving trucks in our area and was elated to see that Penske has finally arrived in the Keys as that is who we used up North.  When I put in the requested info on the online reservation form this is what popped up on the pick up location info: "Florida Keys Truck Rental (305) 292-2062 19970 Overseas Highway No Locals Sugarloaf Key, FL 33042"

I figured, no way, I must be reading that incorrectly so I called and lo and behold I was told that for locals, the rate for a 16' truck jumps from the advertised rate of $29.95 to $99.95 per day plus a $500 security deposit and over $42 in taxes and fees.  We only needed the truck for three hours so, ummm, $99, I don't think so!  Helllooo!  You are a local business stuck smack dab in the middle of the lower Keys. Who else are you going to cater to than the locals?

Boo to you!  Budget or U-Haul here we come. They don't discriminate against locals. And to hell with anyone who does.

I don’t understand all the Nancy-boys who are in such a dither about the potential for armed conflict with Iran.  Aren’t they the ones who couldn’t beat Iraq in an 8+ year war?  You remember Iraq, the guys whose military it took us all of two weeks to defeat!

At least Republicans are admitting that it took a few tries, but in the end Clinton did reform welfare. Thanks, Bill. His welfare to work program was a huge success. Can anyone name a Bush success?

Rotary Club of Key West is having its annual boat show and nautical market this weekend at the Truman Annex waterfront at the end of Southard Street.  Show times are from 9 AM to 6 pm, Saturday and Sunday.  The Rotary Club is giving away 800 free fishing poles to the kids as part of the Fish Florida Program.  Also, lots of family activities like free entertainment, petting zoo and kid's play area.  Over 70 nautical vendors and a dozen boat dealers will be on hand.  Fun for everyone! Bulletin Board

The women of Tecalpulco, Mexico, want the U.S. government to enforce its immigration laws because they want to force their husbands to come back home from working illegally in the United States. They have created an English-language Web page where they identify themselves as the "wetback wives" and broadcast their pleas, both to their men and to the U.S. government. Mexican wives seek ouster of husbands from U.S.

["Gotta Crush" person] I am a SWM and would love to meet you if you’re up for the adventure.  We know we agree that dental hygiene is an important thing.  Maybe we have other things in common.  I also brush both my dogs' teeth.  It is a gross job but not as gross as them kissing me would be if I didn't brush them.  If you’re interested I will put an ad in the classifieds under personals.  I'll be the one looking for the girl with a crush.  Wouldn't that be a fun story telling people how we met if we hit it off?  Only in the Keys.

Since were rehashing old presidents vetoes, how come the republicans screamed "wag the dog" when Clinton wanted to create a homeland security dept?  Again with the republicans: party first, America second. I guess they forgot to mention that.  You didn’t think that was President (?)T-balls idea did you?

ABATE's next meeting is this Sunday at the Marathon Moose lodge (behind Discount Auto) at 11am. And please earmark March 18th for our big poker run too!  We will have two routes, from the north and south and will end up at Jo Jo's, mm 60, for food, fun and music.
How about a ride after the meeting Sunday  Any ride ideas? Bulletin Board

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Wednesday February 28, 2007

Tuesday February 27, 2007

Bill Clinton takes credit for reforming welfare.  The reality is that he vetoed welfare reform legislation sent to him by the Republican congress three times before signing it.  As always, Clinton stuck his finger in the wind, saw that it would be popular, and finally came around.

Architecture has always interested me because the building represents the occupants and buildings last such a very long time. What does your building say about you?

I want to pave my very long driveway. Are their any blacktop contractors around here? Does anyone have any suggestions or experiences with his sort of project?

My sister held an intervention (alcoholic) for a cousin. So we moved the beer into the garage and got wasted and had a great time.

[Moving from the Keys] I know a few people who moved to Puta Gorda on the west coast, but for some reason they came back. I would prefer a place called Puta Flaca.

Iguana McNuggets...it's a thought.

[I never liked Hendrick. He never met a developer he didn’t like] How silly. Are you drinking? I bet you have never met a DUI attorney you didn't like. This makes me think your thoughts are about revenge.  Your revenge should be against the real guilty parties. Get the facts and laws straight, the jury didn't convict on the facts or laws. I'm thinking that the guilty went free and the innocent got convicted.

[Iran] No problem.  A-bomb it, blacktop it, and paint it green.

[nail place in the WD Plaza]  They are great. I go at least once a month and normally the polish stays on until I have to go back.  I’m so happy to have them so close!

For the Moondog fans (although you can barely tell what the video shows except a girl drinking a long-neck Bud) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=frm6p3-CHl8&mode=related&search=

Did they really find the tomb of the Jesus family? If that’s true it will dispel the miracle of the resurrection which is the basis of the Catholic faith. Oops, I used the word faith. Nothing will change because people of faith don’t believe in facts. Religion is a matter of faith not of science.

[Dunkin Doughnuts and where is it going to be put] Dunkin’ Doughnuts is coming to were Paul’s Appliance used to be next to Ace. Like always, I heard it’s a done deal. Pay attention there will be a test.

Mr. County Mayor was not even elected he was appointed.  Let's have an election and see what happens.

[Bill Clinton and Welfare Reform] The facts are that the Republican congress had made a promise to the American people to reform welfare in their Contract with America. The Clinton administration vowed to fight the newly elected congress tooth and nail. They even had Mrs. Clinton traveling around the country denouncing this "Draconian" attack on America’s women and children.  The Democrats in congress tried very hard to prevent the reforms from even making it to vote. Bill Clinton vetoed welfare reform three. Then he followed the polls, and even championed welfare reform before he finally signed it into law.

Does anyone else wonder what's happened to their mail service? In Palm Villa it's often 6 or 6:30 PM before mail gets delivered. USPS says it should happen before 5 PM.

On Friday I called Dion's Oil, the jobber who would be able to tell me where the nearest BP gas station is located. I left a message on a woman's answering machine and have not yet received a call back. It is now late Monday. Tomorrow I will try again and will post my results. http://www.bp.com/home.do?categoryId=1

Al Gore’s electric bill. http://www.drudgereport.com/flash.htm He’s doing his part to reduce energy use. Not!

Someone should Ex Parte the sheriff if he and his multitude of deputies are unable to serve the baker act. Especially to some who could really be helped by the process.

[Jesus’ remains] They say they found the remains of Jesus. If that can be proven the believers will just change their beliefs to mean that his spirit rose from the dead and not his body. They’ll say they misread the bible; or they’ll say something else to fit the facts.

Paul's Appliance has always done me right.  I have bought quite a few things there and the prices and service have been top quality.  The one time I did have a problem they came out that same day and fixed it on the spot.  They called the next day to say "Thank You" and see if everything was OK and followed up a week later with another call to make sure all was still well.  That is Old School service which is rare these days.

Concerned parents and neighbors need to attend the meetings at Sugarloaf on Wed. Feb. 28 and Tues. March 6 at 6 PM. 36 "affordable" housing units for sale and rent will be built on our school property right next to the playground unless you voice your opposition.

[Bill Clinton reformed welfare] You have obviously forgotten that the republican congress sent the bill for welfare reform to BC three times before he signed it. The vote when straight down party lines so that it couldn’t pass until the republicans had both the house and senate.

A good example of the negative reporting of the doom and gloom news media. Another bomb went off in Afghanistan at a US airbase north of Kabul. Vice President Chaney happened to be at this airbase. CNN has been riding on this lame horse trying to make a big news scoop out of it. The VP wasn't anywhere close to the blast and far from any danger. It wasn't a newsworthy event. It just shows you what these assholes are capable of. It makes you wonder why they don't concentrate the same energy on positive things. Why don’t we ever see piles of dead Taliban and other rag heads or sheet heads?

[High Price of Paradise in the Florida Keys]  When Real Estate comes back, we're also moving.  I hope the new resident billionaires bring their own workers because there won't be any of them left down here.  What is scary is that we cannot move now and are stuck down here with a bunch of retarded yahoos. http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2007/02/23/business/realestate/main2508462.shtml

I am trying to go through your archives to find a story or comment written by someone in the area regarding a derelict boat in Cudjoe? Do you know of such a comment? It would have been around June 2006.

[Stolen boat posting Saturday Feb 27] Here is my response to this persons comment. First of all it sounds like someone is trying hard to get some damage control (hotel). If the above person knew what they were talking about I would have to agree. But since they don't and they obviously are trying to cover up the hotel’s grand theft. If there was a lien on yacht on or before June 1, 06 when the hotel took the boat, yes its civil and everyone will agree. If in fact the hotel did take the boat with no lien it’s clearly grand theft. I understand the hotel claims money is owed to them and they don't even have a written lease. Instead of wasting our time with accusations claiming the hotel was in the right, show us a copy of the lien they had on or before 6-1-06. If you cant quit wasting our time, we know its theft. As far as your comment on us simple folk, we want to see this lien you talk so much about. And I guarantee you cannot provide one. Make sure you folks keep an eye out for this lien.

And do us another favor quit trash talking about a damn good newspaper that keeps us up to date on corruption and hotels that commit grand theft. Hats off to Dennis Cooper.

I have been reading this site for a couple years now and get my daily laugh.  I've read some pretty good comments, pretty bad comments, pretty funny comments and pretty ignorant comments.  I have written some good, bad, funny and ignorant (beer induced) comments too.  I have to agree with the people who have written in saying the comment about Chelsea Clinton going to Iraq takes the prize for most ignorant comment in the history of this page.

I am left with two questions.  First one is for our editor, Ed please answer.  If we get enough people writing in to support the thought will you do a monthly or ever semi-annually page re-posting the most ignorant and funniest comments made?  It could be kind of like the "Best of The Crime Report" done in The KW Citizen twice a year.  The second question is to the fellow readers of this site.  If the editor agrees to do it does anyone else support the thought and think it would be a good addition to the site?  Maybe if enough of us request it the editor will do it. (Ed: That’s a great idea. Unfortunately, we don’t have the time to do it. Would you like to be our Stupid Post Editor? You could save the emails and copy and paste them onto one big email and send it to us when you get enough really stupid posts? We’d love to publish them.)

[I wrote the “gotta crush” post] I am SWF but the crush ended because the man had a stinky, dirty mouth.  A real deal killer.  Why do people neglect their teeth?  This affects the heart plus it's one of the first things people see.  Dental work is expensive and I have gone without food just to take care of this business.  Maybe he will copy this and give it some attention for possible future re-crush.  Otherwise, dog breath is reserved for the dog and even then, I brush its teeth (after getting all liquored-up).  I should probably floss them too, with them handy new picks.  Cats too, require dental cleanings.   

I would like to have some information on any campgrounds in the Big Pine Key area. It seems like a perfect area for a camping trip. jnllakeside@cs.com

[Clinton reformed welfare] Please.  He vetoed it twice before popular majority forced him to sign the Bill (only after vetoing many line items) Get your facts straight.  The Republican House and Senate drafted the Bill which he vetoed, so let's give credit where it is deserved.   

Does anyone know what the protocol is for passing someone who is fishing in a marked channel or a narrow passage marked with stakes requiring the passing boat to be up on plane due to shallow water?   The other day I blew past a flats guy fishing near the Cook Island cut out near Little Palm who acted as though he owned the channel, what little there is.  I see similar behavior between the markers in Bow Channel.  I know I am responsible for my wake, but I was just wondering if there are rules regarding sitting or anchoring in water that boats under way have to use for safe navigation. I await someone’s enlightened response.  Thanks from a somewhat novice boater.

The person yesterday that said they make too much for a habitat home, but can’t afford to buy a house here are correct. Some of the owners of habitat homes knew how to play the system and hide their money. It may not be a good example for their kids, but let’s face reality. There are sneaky people in every program. Good luck in your search for a home on your income and you can at least know when you lay down at night in your home you did it honestly. Some cannot say that.

[Your Body Is Your Temple]  Those of us who are pro-active in staying healthy follow a good diet and exercise program in addition to not polluting ourselves with excessive use of drugs, alcohol and tobacco.  An anorexic lady whose hair is falling out recently asked me if I were afraid to die because I take good care of myself.  What a stupid question.  We do it to look and feel good, sleep well, stay happy and comfortable; to live to be a hundred, keep our hair and our bodies working well.  We don't get out of life alive, but seeing people die from neglecting their bodies and spirits is not pretty.  Being a bald stick figure isn't either.  Miss Vegan needs to eat a big, juicy steak; her brain really needs some protein and amino acids. 

(Blaming the Sheriff Deputy for removing Thacker from the BOCC meeting is like blaming our troops for the Iraq war.) Wow, it's a good thing DiGenarro didn't order the deputy to remove Kay Thacker from the BOCC meeting and immediately shoot her!

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Tuesday February 27, 2007

Monday February 26, 2007

A year ago today, the first Big Pine Grind ran on BPK.com so I decided to print up an updated version. Thanks for the venue.

Everyone seems to forget that Bill Clinton reformed welfare when no one else would touch it—and he’s a Democrat. In six years Bush hasn’t done anything except reduce taxes by increasing the national debt.

My husband and I are leaving Big Pine and the Keys after three years.  We love Big Pine and wish we could make it here.  But besides not ever being able to afford a house and being tired of paying rent, we are fed up with the high prices, crazy drivers from Miami and work environments that seem more than willing to put up with bad employees.  My new supervisor, originally from Miami, couldn't find his way out of a paper bag, let alone show the ability to make a decision.  My husband's place of employment has been sending him and the other guys home either early or told not to come in at all one day a week.  He thinks they are getting ready to sell to a big developer and then he'll be out of a job.  I'm going to miss the weather but not the traffic, high rent or eggs that sell for $1.75 a dozen.  I wish the rest of you luck and I will send good vibes during next summer's hurricane season.  Adios!

Oh, and by the way...what the hell is "affordable housing"?  My husband and I make too much to qualify for a Habitat or Land Trust home but we can't afford a $2300/month house payment with insurance.  And we make a combined $75,000/year.  Somebody needs to redefine "affordable". 

I have a few issues with the BOCC incident.  First, I have a hard time believing a woman was escorted out for simply displaying a thumbs down, even in Monroe County.  There's got to be more to it.  Second, do you really think the deputy wants to do the bidding of the BOCC?  Hell no.  Those guys are underpaid and have the worst benefits in the state because of our selfish BOCC.  Folks, don't believe everything you read on this website.

[There are more moving sales listed in the Citizen than yard sales] People are getting smart and getting out before the great Keys collapses and redevelopment junta take over! Me too, but where too?

[Government in Action] Nathaniel Abraham was convicted of murder in 1998 and incarcerated, but only until he turned 21, which was in January, at which time he was moved into a rent-free apartment in Bay City, Mich., and enrolled tuition-free in Delta College, in a program sponsored by Michigan Rehabilitation Services. Though some criticized such lavish treatment of a murderer, Abraham seemed ready to start his new life, arriving in Oakland Circuit Court for his formal release wearing a black fur coat, ivory fedora hat, and a ivory and hot-pink pinstriped suit with matching pink tie and shoes.

How does the person posting about Dunkin Doughnuts know what he says he knows? We all heard that there will be no doughnuts for Big Pine. And where is it going to be put?

I was wondering if anybody knows who might rent a boat (20 foot +/-) for some friends of mine coming down to visit next week.  He owns a big old pontoon boat and a 25 ft. fishing boat up on Lake Oshkosh up in Wisconsin and would like to have a boat over at Parmer's where he is staying with his wife and 2 kids.  I asked at Parmer's and they said they had no idea who might rent a boat.  The fish camp over by No Name rents them but not to take back to his place overnight.  Please email if you have any suggestions at tphanson@comcast.net 

[Dunkin’ Doughnuts is coming] Has anyone done a traffic study? Is this going to harm the deer? Is it going to make the people of the area fatter? Is it going to make us drink more coffee? Is it going to make people from other county's come to buy its doughnuts? Are they going to be required to label the nutritional value? I hope some busybody has their nose in this situation.

One good thing, everyone will know where to find a cop if they need one.

I had a dream last night that good for nothing Sloan’s ramblings disappeared from bigpinekey.com. It just goes to show you what a little knowledge and a lot of money can accomplish. --max21@bellsouth.net

[Winn Dixie clean it up] What's up with you people? Wake  up. This is where we buy food for life. I can't drive 60 miles to shop somewhere else. Clean it up and keep it that way. You people would be the first ones in line to sue if you got sick on some bad food from Winn Dixie.

[Paul’s Appliances] He moved over by the flea market.

[BP Card] If you had a car to put gas in you could use your card.

[Ragheads are the big threat] I'm shocked by the total lack of caring and political correctness by this poster. They now like to be called "Little Sheet Heads".

[Winn-Dixie] I’m a local and have shopped there since it opened. the parking lot could be cleaner and the inside of the store could defiantly be cleaner. You can smell the seafood section from 30 ft away.

[What ever happened to Paul’s Appliances] Did they go broke? No it was piss poor service! -- JFL333@aol.com

I regularly shave for my lady and she for me. I’m a taker, but she has a keeper, so there!

See how many you get right. Can you tell the difference between a female and a shemale?  Okay, Imagine yourself in a bar and you've had a few drinks and the bar is full of women (?) or are they? You pick them... Click here: Can you tell the difference between a Female and a Shemale  With no drinks, I missed 2! I don't know if that's good or am I in trouble?

I’ll buy your BP gas cards.

(sounds like) rude Leaky bar.  A few of my friends said the best chicken fingers could be had there, not if you first order a diet soda. They have none and didn't check to see if I wanted anything. After waiting for a 1/2 hour I decided they didn't want my order for twelve orders of fingers. A better bartender would have maybe brought a water or juice drink. Their loss.

My wife and kids did an intervention with me Sunday night. They say I am addicted to this site and share too much detail in some of my posts. I agreed not to read or post again.

[Paul’s Appliances going broke] That was rude you sorry bastard. After Wilma I replaced all my appliances from Paul’s at a lower price and in 3 days. (3 Freezers, 2 refrigerators, washer and dryer.)

Someone wrote in today saying "Gotta Crush. Choosing good company or none at all."  That is a tough issue for anyone single and straight in the Keys.  Males and females alike.  Is the person who wrote this male or female?

Then they wrote "I highly recommend a product which has made flossing easy:  "Floss Picks" for healthy teeth and gums.  They effectively remove plaque and help prevent gingivitis and are also contoured to remove annoying food particles and stimulate gums.  Plus you'll have minty-fresh breath for that first kiss."

That is so true these days.  I would love to meet someone (female) who feels the same way.  Any out there?

[Paul’s Appliance posting] He is alive and well and doing better than before--just no showroom. He helped us just get all new appliances at very good prices.

To the one asking Chelsea Clinton to go to Iraq. What are you doing waiting for a woman to go, hero? Step up General.

[To the left-over '60s peace protesters at the traffic light] I too think we should bring all our troops home. That way they won’t get hurt when we help Iran with their nuclear energy program by nuking them and the rest of the "peace loving followers of Islam" back to the 7th century that they so love.

What channel were the Oscars on? We couldn’t find them. From what I see today, we didn’t miss much--a bunch or montages and pre-recorded speeches.

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Monday February 26, 2007

Sunday February 25, 2007

I can only wonder how Jim Hendrick, one of “the most powerful people in Monroe County” felt this morning when he woke up in jail with Bruno rubbing his leg. How come we all like to see the mighty fall? I never liked Hendrick. He never met a developer he didn’t like. He did all he could to ruin the Keys with development and crooked deals.

I agree with the “lock up the code violators”. We should build a gas chamber just for them

Your Honor my client is an idiot.  Man Holds Up Convenience Store With Tennis Racquet.  A 20 year old California man was arrested after he tried to rob a gas station convenience store with a tennis racket he claimed was an Uzi assault rifle. A security guard disarmed him of the tennis racket and handcuffed him. He was then arrested on suspicion of robbery, criminal threats and being under the influence of a controlled substance.

[Great news and bad news] 1^st the great news: DNA testing shows that I, Incredible Insanity, am not the father of Anna Nichole Smith’s baby. Now, 2^nd, the bad news: There are more moving sales listed in the Citizen than yard sales. Where are all these people moving to and why?

Ch 6 just showed a teaser for an upcoming program on child modeling and pornography. In the commercial they showed every photo they had. I think these kinds of shows just pander to perverts. If the photos are so offensive why do the show every one of them?

Clinton's daughter will be glad to follow the Bush twins into war since their dad got us into this.

What ever happened to Paul’s Appliances? Did they go broke?

[Bill Clinton responsible for Iraq war] It’s about time that Chelsea Clinton joins the forces in Iraq. If her mother won’t step up to the plate the least the daughter can do is enlist because her father is responsible for this war and her mother won’t stop it.

Does anyone have any experience with the nail place in the WD Plaza?  I was thinking about going in there for a pedicure.

The original poster of “I have the biggest crush on someone” and the horney guy are one and same person--guru of games. You can’t change what you do not acknowledge is a stone cold heart incapable of feelings? Be real baby.

I'm tried of all you whiners.

Winn-Dixie. Why do we have all the complaints in the season? We only have one store here. If you don't like it, go the hell back home. It's our locals’ store and we like it.

This is two examples of me and how good a parker I am. Parking1  Parking2

[Sheriff removing citizen] The deputy should have told the Mayor, “I see no disturbance or disorderly conduct, please continue with the meeting.” But we all know the sheriff’s office has looked the other way for many years to what our corrupt elected officials are doing. Why else is it always an outside law enforcement agency that has to clean up the really big piles of crap in the Keys?  London, Hendrick and hopefully Singh, in the near future. Sheriff Roth’s Navy and Air Force have been the payoffs to look the other way when we run the local government. Name one time Roth’s dept has even investigated local political corruption. I’m waiting?

Road rash. Ouch!

Moose blew the hanging plastic wind protectors off the Tiki Bar last night. Two great guitar players, a superb drummer, a cameo harp player and of course the wild man himself--Moose. Great Show!

Blaming the Sheriff Deputy for removing Thacker from the BOCC meeting is like blaming our troops for the Iraq war.  Leave the blame where it belongs.  The Deputy was just doing as ordered from the folks who sign his paychecks.  Besides, I do not believe he used any force.

[Gotta Crush] Choosing good company or none at all.  Just because some of us choose to be single does not make us incomplete or invalid.  When I go out to the bars I seem to meet bikers with dental issues or they smoke or they are married.  Or they are just plain psycho stalker with arrest records. 

I highly recommend a product which has made flossing easy:  "Floss Picks" for healthy teeth and gums.  They effectively remove plaque and help prevent gingivitis and are also contoured to remove annoying food particles and stimulate gums.  Plus you'll have minty-fresh breath for that first kiss.

How can I get a useless BP gas card. I shop there every week. How did you get yours?

The Breezeswept Beach yard sale should be a great event.  I just hope the vacant lot is zoned commercial and there is a proper demonstration permit along with an occupational license.  We better get a crossing guard and maybe some orange cones there too.  Lets check out their workman's comp insurance.  I would hate for that complete penis who lives down the street behind the Chevron to call Code Enforcement and then bring in the National Guard.

[Re: Bicycle Joanie Nelson] “So she won't stand for a mini-second” I don't suppose you meant millisecond? (One thousandth of a second. Doesn't anyone speak English here?

It sounds like the ghosts of Bum Farto is haunting Monroe County. I suspect someone has a long reaching agenda, to push out the average people and replace them with people with fat wallets. The way to force you out is by assessing properties beyond their value. When you can no longer pay the taxes you must sell. Organize a county wide tax strike! The mayor must think that he is an autocrat. He has to be reminded that you live in a democracy, demand his resignation, protest, make noise, throw his ass out and all his cronies. Protesting against corruption is like penicillin against a sickness!

Someone said in order to make the "Ladies removing our Bush" protest work is a male witness.  I will gladly let every guy in The Keys watch me shave if he shaves bald along next to me.  Good for one is good for all.  Any takers? I didn't think so.

I suggest everyone call WD and complain about the BP card. I still have one from last year which I'm told I can renew for another year.  Now I have $50 worth of gas money and no place to use it. Otherwise I love WD.

Funny how the all-seeing can never seem to find this.

I told you Dunkin’ Donuts was coming. It’s been a done deal for 3 months now. About time too. Those poor overworked donut eaters may have better attitudes now.

Forget worrying about the Mexicans and the Cubans.  The Ragheads are the big threat.

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Sunday February 25, 2007

Saturday February 24, 2007

To the person who accused me of fraud I offer these facts which are easily verifiable through the public record. I do not own any property any where else but Monroe County. The property is deeded to me and me alone. My son and daughter-in-law reside in the home full time and I spend much time there with them. You may be confused by the fact that my wife is the sole and only owner of a home on the mainland which she homesteads in her name.

Florida statute allows only one homestead per family unit, so if you are married and have two homesteads you must prove financial separation. This would have been easy for us to do because very early on in our marriage, for primarily estate tax purposes, all our finances were separate. I bought my home in the Keys with only my money from only my accounts. She bought her home with her own money from her own accounts. We have our own credit cards, checking accounts, etc.

There are a few other conditions that must be met such as primary residence, voter registration, drivers license, where you receive your tax return, etc., but there is one hassle of which I was not aware until your call to the County associated with 2 homesteads. Even though I am legally correct, the counties don't like the loss of revenue so each year they make you re-apply and automatically reject you. You must appeal and show up at the appeal hearing with current documentation proving continued financial separation. You must do this separately in both counties where you are homesteaded. There are currently 11 families in Monroe County doing this successfully year after year. They are willing to spend the time and paperwork to jump through the hoops. It is not that uncommon in this day and age for married couples with different interests and desires to spend quiet a bit of time doing their own thing.

So to conclude, I did nothing illegal or fraudulent, but I did give up my homestead exemption because I refused to jump through the hoops year after year and didn't want my wife to have to do it too. Also, showing some board, made up of my neighbors, all my financial information is too intrusive for me. Again, 11 families in Monroe are in exactly the same situation as I am, but personally, it was not worth the aggravation to me to save a few grand. So, I am not guilty of being a fraud, but I am guilty of being incredibly lazy and private. 

Miss "look in the mirror" needs to look at herself in the mirror and see herself for the hypocrite that she is.  She has claimed a homestead in Monroe County since 1997.  She moved to the Keys full time in 2002.  During that time she received a "Star" exemption on property she owned in upstate New York.  A star exemption reduces your school taxes.  Florida statutes don't allow for a homestead exemption if you are receiving any exemptions in another state.  She needs to call the County on herself soon as the interest and penalties increase everyday she waits.

[If feral cats are such apex predators, why are we overrun with iguanas and chickens] Simple. As soon as the prey becomes too large to overpower, it is too large for them. Are you implying that cats won't kill small iguanas or small birds?

This is the "Motts" for all of you that remember that apple sauce commercial. Dunkin’ Doughnuts is coming to were Paul’s Appliance used to be next to Ace. Like always, I heard it’s a done deal.

No, we don't need another grocery store on BP.  What we need is for WD to get there act together and do what is important to better their store.

Every time you stick a person’s email address on your site, you are likely getting them added to spammer databases. Yes, believe it or not spammers use scripts that "crawl".   Go to a normal forum/board type system and you don’t have to decide, edit or whatever you do, the comments posted by your users.  You must have a lot of free time.  Use the technology.  Its already available and much of it freely available. (Ed: Spam is a fact of the internet. Everyone should have a good spam filter. No other web based forum looks like the Coconut Telegraph does and is as easy to use. We place two dashes in front of the email address to stymie the crawlers and that should take care of your concern.)

I fully support the U.S. Constitution.  But, I think freedom of speech is taken a little too far when a local newspaper editor prints stories without making any attempt to reveal the truth.  The Blue Tabloid just released an article about a "stolen" boat, blaming every one under the sun for not doing anything.  The boat was reported by Ocean Key House.  The guy whom the boat was reported from is too lazy to handle his own problem, so he's blaming the Sheriff and State Attorney for not arresting the lien holder.  The problem is, when a lien holder repossesses property, it is not a crime.  It has to be handled in the civil arena between the two parties.  Even us simple folk can understand that.  I know that editor is notorious for half-truths, but he should be held accountable for his negligent reporting.

Does one county commissioner, or the county mayor (who is a county commissioner elected mayor by a majority of the other county commissioners) have the legal power/right to remove a Monroe County registered voter from a pubic county commission meeting without first gaining approval of at least two other county commissioners?

Does the County Commission itself have the legal power/right to have any registered voter removed from a public county commission meeting; who is not disrupting the meeting or posing threat to life and limb of other people or self?

Do county commissioners, who see another county commissioner doing something they believe is improper or illegal, have a duty to step forward and object and do what they can under county commission procedural rules to resolve the problem?

Does the County Sheriff and the State Attorney have a legal duty to protect people from errant county commissioners?

Does the Monroe County Commission want the entire world to view it as a circus or Star Chamber?

The wild cats are not native to our Keys. The cats do kill rats, baby lizards, and other none-native invaders. They also kill off each other for territorial rights. The bad part is they have killed off most of the indigenous fowl, what ate the bugs. This is the real problem. Also, chickens are a farm animal and by law are not allowed to run around openly. They carry very nasty bugs, germs and make a mess wherever they roam.  They are however, the National Bird of a powerful group of other invaders, so we can't make waves. Right?

[evicted from a KW commission meeting ] This makes me laugh. Not one thing has been mentioned on this BPK forum about the Monroe County Planning Commission and the take over of our Keys by developers. Wake up people, your time is short here unless you decide to open your eyes to what is happening. Those two companies, who are destroying our way of life with your tax money, could care less about you and your home. They are doing a job on you that the MCPC is too chicken to do on their own. That is take your land from you to develop and profit from. Come to the March 13th meeting at the Sugarloaf School or lose everything!

Population control is the ultimate form of totalitarianism--the sine qua non of the New World Order. http://www.freerepublic.com:80/forum/a3926ba0b3bfa.htm

[Lost 2 dogs] I’m wondering why they waited until yesterday to start looking for their dogs if they were lost on Dec 16^th?

[Lucky's Landing] Regardless of anything else, the owner is complying with county regulations and has the right to do with his property whatever he wants within the boundaries set forth by the county regulations. Who are any of us to tell him what he can and can't do with the property he has been paying taxes on for many years.

I'm soooo f**king glad that Mark on Doctors Arm had such a blow out birthday considering his blood children go without so much because he is over $40,000 in the hole for child support and only pays half each month now. Well, party on dude, karma will get you before I do!  --Wldfire5@aol.com

Breezeswept Beach Association Annual Yard Sale on Ramrod Key. Saturday only, Febuary 24^th  8am- 2pm.  Located on West Indies Drive just past the Looe Key Tiki Bar parking lot. Something for everybody.  See your there!

Some interesting thoughts on the hot issue of 
Global Warming.  
/www.opinionjournal.com

The Baker Act is impossible if you plan on doing it through the Sherriff. A better approach would be going to a judge and using the Exparte Act or action or what ever. I'm not a lawyer.

Here’s a new one. If you’re stuck in a cubicle and hate your job, listen to a movie. listentoamovie.com

I think the Mayor of Monroe County went to the same school as the ex-coach of the Miami Dolphins. They don't know how to communicate. They just tell everyone they think they are smarter than them (all of us) to leave the room. I didn't elect the S.O,B., but having the option I would un-elect him. He is arrogant and self-centered. Get over it and listen to everyone. If you don't like what you here, you walk. Don't ask the people who take the time to speak for the majority to leave your side show. You leave.
--Ntd4880@aol.com

The people at Lucky’s Landing are in the same boat as the people at Seahorse, only they paid more for their trailers.

Presidential quizzes. Multiple choice (I always liked multiple choices in school). Welcome to The American Presidency

How come the person that said "Chelsea Clinton should be in Iraq pulling her fair share" isn’t saying "She should be here in Iraq where I am"?

This County hasn’t changed. It's still the 70s and still corrupt.

Free dog or cat food. You’ll have earned it after you jump thru all Purina’s hoops. http://purinaoneoffer.com 

[The current owner of Lucky's Landing did not own it when Ernie's Island Woman was in operation] Woody Mock, a local contractor at that time did.

Wi-Fi directory. free wi-fi hotspots wifi cafes coffee shops hotels airports RV Parks

[I have the biggest crush on someone] Don't worry, If it's a chick you'll get your turn, just don't lose your place in line.

On his radio talk show Bill O’Reilly said that Anna Nichole’s body was decomposing “except for her lips and breasts”.  Sick, but funny.

I like Winn Dixie. Watch the news and pick on someone else. How about our County to start with?

[This is my first time on this site and maybe my last. It should be just Whiners. All you people sweating the small stuff don't care that our only local place to shop for food to live by was a feature on channel 10 news for being a dirty grocery store]  What the hell?  That sounds like whining to me.  It takes one to know one, so, there!

I am looking for a friend of mine named Nick Cowger (Nicholas G. Cowger). He has a son named Calvin. He had an address in Big Pine Key, FL.

If anyone knows of him and I can reach him, I would appreciate an email from you or him. Julie.Reese@capmark.com

[Shuttle bus and Crime]  Dates picked at random:

Feb 22 2007. Arrests 20. 1 from Homestead 1 from Miami, 1 from Florida City, working in Marathon and 1 from Virginia, Maybe he came by shuttle bus also. The rest are all locals from the Keys.

When Kay Thacker was taken out by the sheriff at Wednesday's BOCC meeting, with 2 minutes left (and no un-orderly behavior) why in the world did the Sheriff take her out? Obviously there was no misconduct, or out of control behavior. I know there is a problem with Mayor Di Gennaro asking her to leave (and a problem with him) but what about the sheriff? What grounds did the sheriff have? I think the sheriff should take responsibility as well as mayor Di Gennaro.

We should get many people to attend the next BOCC and hold all their thumbs down!

Kay Thacker is not an activist she's a whiner. Look for yourself. www.keylargokey.com/kt22.mpg  --Govwatch05@comcast.net (Ed: we couldn’t get the audio to work properly.)

I don’t believe the shuttle bus has increased the crime rate in the Keys by outsiders. Do you remember who was breaking into our houses here not to long ago? A local kid, whose family has a long and respectable history in the Keys.  The shuttle bus provides a needed service for locals. I hate all you fear mongers out there.

WD shopping center is looking better. The landscaping is very nice, but the stores need to keep their windows clean. Dirty windows are not inviting to customers and it also makes the shopping center look derelict.

I do not know a thing about the meeting, but if a citizen was taken out by force for giving a thumbs down (if she did not curse or abuse, etc and she did use her thumb not another famous finger) She should sue and win thousands more from the local government (and we’ll pay more taxes for their continued abuse of the citizens). Remember how much was lost when they tried to railroad the other tourist conch tour company, Duck Tours?  Was anyone on this forum there? Did you actually see it? The last time I looked this was American soil that many have given so much for so we can have our say and “yay” and “nay” to our hearts content!  That is why the military forces have given their all for us?   So some tyrant can run ruff-shod over us? No!

Even if it costs us, she should sue and win and teach the Mayor what impeachment really is. When are these little despots going to respect the electorate?

[Professional sperm donor] I’m sorry to inform you that you must donate your sperm to a cup. That’s how it’s done. Too bad! I wanted to be a donor too.

[Horney guy] Someone wrote in "I have the biggest crush on someone" and went on to say they are going to look for someone else.  If this person is reading today, are you male or female?  Still looking?  It is tough to be single and straight in The Keys.  Single male here looking too.

The medical examiner in the Anna Nicole Smith case says the delayed burial is allowing the body to decompose.  With all that silicone, saline and collagen most of her should be in good shape!

Free Burn Rubber motorcycle game. I couldn’t get ten feet down the road. Wild Hogs -- The Official Movie Site  You might have better luck with this one, but you have to register.

[FKAA Bilingual] Your right!   My problem is that I don’t have time to become bilingual. If I wanted to go to Mexico for a job then I would study Spanish, but for now I am staying in America and therefore the basic language spoken in the business world should be English.  It’s just a matter of time before we’re a minority, Gee!  Does that mean I can get government welfare then?  Probably not, cause the government will be out of money and I won’t be able to speak Spanish to collect.

[Have you seen a rice rate? They are big] You obviously have never seen a silver rice rat. You must be thinking, and I use that term loosely, of the exotic Gambian pouch rat.

It seems to me, this "affordable housing” for the work force is another con job. Everywhere else where the rich live and have large estates, they have no problems with workers and housing. It's called "neighborhoods". One for the upper class, one for the middle class and one for the rest of us. Live with it and stop trying to give the Keys’ land away to these "Help the poor" con artist developers.

When the unwary and somewhat intoxicated patron of a local watering hole was invited back to a motel for a big ‘lap dance’ he didn’t know it was a Jersey Woman’s motel room, nor did he have any idea it would be a near death experience.  The man survived only after promising the Jersey gal a night out at an all-you-can-eat buffet and a trip to the dollar store for a jewelry and perfume shopping spree if she would stop.  He told authorities, “I thought for sure I was a goner.  I’m outta here!”  Investigators tried to locate the woman by following a trail of Dion’s chicken bones and candy wrappers but were unsuccessful.  The frightened man has left the area.

[BMW, Cadillac, or Lincolns outside Habitat for Humanity homes] You forgot the luxury boats parked underneath!

Thanks to the poster of "why we need pets". I know now why I miss my dog of 17 years so much and why I need another one.

The good news is that I got my $25 BP (British petroleum not Big Pine) gasoline card from Winn-Dixie. The bad news is that the closest BP gas station is in Key Largo, according to the girl behind the W Dixie customer service counter. I have phoned a few numbers and am awaiting a call back from a message I left on someone's answering machine. I'll post what I learn.

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Saturday February 24, 2007

Friday February 23, 2007

What the hell is going on here when a citizen can't voice his or her opinion at a county commission meeting? Where does Mayor DiGennaro get off having someone removed by a Sheriff's Deputy, because she made a "thumbs down" gesture at something that was said during the meeting? In case you haven't heard your honor (and I use that term loosely), we are allowed to voice our opinion in this country, whether you like it or not, just as you are allowed to voice your opinion, whether we like it or not. It's called freedom of speech. Now, I don't know either Ms Thacker or the Mayor, but it seems to me that something is very wrong with his heavy handed, dictator-like tactics, both with the citizenry and his fellow commissioners. The Mayor is out of control and should be removed from office.  We live in America, not Iraq, Iran or North Korea. And that's my opinion Mayor, whether you like it or not. I don't know why this issue has gotten me so riled up, but it has.  Ok, I'm done now. --jazzyone44@yahoo.com

The British General Dental Council found David Quelch guilty of professional misconduct for pulling two teeth of a patient, against her will, without anesthesia, because she had complained about previous treatments. He supposedly said, "That'll teach you ..."

[Lucky’s Landing] I don’t think anyone is against the owner. It’s just that we’re going to be losing more affordable housing for our dwindling work force. Trailers are affordable, condos are not.

Once upon a time there lived a man named Joseph, who grew tired of living with people and left his village and went into the woods to live. By and by, a wolf pack discovered Joseph and over time got to know him and that he was not like other men, and eventually they took him into their pack. The leader of the pack was a red wolf named David, and soon David and Joseph became fast friends, and they hunted and played and slept together like wolves…Sloan's Space

I’m thinking someone needs to "Baker Act" Britney.

This is my first time on this site and maybe my last. It should be just Whiners. All you people sweating the small stuff don't care that our only local place to shop for food to live by was a feature on channel 10 news for being a dirty grocery store. Haven't you ever wonder why the freezers and dairy coolers are always being fixed? Maybe it's time for another grocery store to come into this town rather than another Drug store. Oh, no, not another Francis!(?)

[Left cheeked or right] My friend said the way you can tell which cheeked you are is by sitting up straight and try to fart. The cheek you lift to fart is what cheek you are. I’m right-cheeked.

When is Chelsea Clinton going to do her duty and go to Iraq? We all know her mother, the senator, isn’t doing anything to get us out. So let her daughter pull her fair share.

If feral cats are such apex predators, why are we overrun with iguanas and chickens?

Nope, you ain’t imagining it. Major and minor crime is going thru the roof since that bus service started. And the drug dealing in Key West and Marathon is just out of control now. Thanks again BOCC.

In regards to the letter about Lucky's Landing yesterday:  Most of the mobile homes were rebuilt after Wilma, not all were destroyed.  They are anchored to the ground and cannot be moved and the ones that can be moved have nowhere to go within a fifty mile radius.  Get the facts.

[Cats] Have you thought that when you animal haters kill all these cats, here comes the rats in groves and then they will for some reason get them protected as they have done with the "rice rat".  Have you seen a rice rate?  They are big!  Watch out.  You really need to find another hobby, maybe like work or volunteering that would be good.  Have a wonderful life and leave all the wonderful animals and reptiles of the world alone. You’re the real animal.  

People would be amazed at the number of local businesses whose startup money came from 70s drug deals.

In addition to the cars, there are a number of boats parked under and next to Habitat Landing houses that cost a lot more than mine did.

[Christian Country Music] In March, 2005, this song was performed at a Diamond Rio concert. They received an immediate standing ovation, and continue to do so every time they perform it! Sadly, major radio stations wouldn't play it because it was considered politically incorrect. Consequently, the song was never released to the public. If this song speaks to your heart, share it with friends and loved ones. Then let us cease being the silent majority and join together -- not as a particular political party, but as Americans! http://gunbarrelcityradio.com/InGodWeStillTrust.wmv

Shuttle bus, heck. You’ve got to love the guy that put his bike on the JGA, rode the bus to Marathon, biked to Orion Bank, robbed it, made his getaway, put his bike back on the bus and headed back to Homestead.

Remember "The Steakery" off Crane Blvd on Sugarloaf? Now there's a bunch of old stories!

[FKAA bilingual preferred] Unfortunately our country’s ethnic makeup has changed. Hating the change will not make it go back to the way it was. I think it’s time for all Americans to learn a few words of Spanish. What harm could it do? Gracias.

Has anyone else noticed that the song "I've Got Something in My Front Pocket for You" from South Park sounds a lot like the Biz Baz theme song? Check it out. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aCZx5-b9tlE

What are these sickos who turn in their neighbors to various county agencies alleging all kinds of things? Maybe they lived in Nazi Germany in a previous life and belonged to the Gestapo and turned in their neighbors for practicing the wrong religion; or maybe were members of the secret police in the old Soviet Union and turned in their neighbors for not being true communists. A pathetic, miserable person with no life of their own who's only entertainment is to spy on their neighbors.

Freedom of speech is dead in Monroe County. Evicting a citizen from a public meeting for making a gesture is not the way we do things here. Get rid of DiGennaro instead. I disagree with everything he says and does. God, we finally got rid of Nelson (may he rest in peace) now we’ve got this character running the County. I’d vote for Kay Thacker any time. usa33043@yahoo.com

I live at Lucky’s Landing and want to let 'know it all" know about our situation.  First not all trailers were under water.  I had no water even come in the door. I  bought there 6 years ago and was told by the owner, "I have no interest in selling and it will stay in the family.”  So I put in quite a sum of money for our place and now he changes his mind.  Where do you think our homes can me moved? On  A1A?  Fool, you just can’t up and move them.  Some neighbors have been there for years, where do they go? Can they afford $1000 a month rent?  No they can’t. Yes, this is his land to make into condos and no, I can’t afford the $250000 to $300000 affordable housing price tag.  I have paid taxes for 45 years and I’m now retired. I feel I paid my dues.   

I've decided I have found my calling.  I am going to become a professional Sperm Donor.  Once I have established a list of clients the fees will be high for my service.  Does anyone want to try my service for free before I launch my career?

The current owner of Lucky's Landing did not own it when Ernie's Island Woman was in operation.

Don't be afraid to cross that Bridge! Come join the Moondogs tonight for fun and tail waggin' at the Dockside Lounge in Marathon. And Saturday night the Moondogs will rock the KOA campground in Sugarloaf. As always, all dogs are invited to bring their owners along.

Lost two dogs, one male, one female. Both white with brown spots. Male is around 70 pounds, female is around 50, both very friendly about a year old. Each have collars, but no tags. One camouflage collar and one fluorescent orange. Lost in Eden Pines area on December 16th around 10 am.  Reward. Please call we miss our pets! 228-343-3346 Or 515-556-8758

Does anyone think the judge on the Anna Nicole Smith hearing might want the same television coverage that Judge Ito had?

To those of you with your head in the sand. Yes, the earth has weather cycles, but humans are putting it on the fast track.

[To heck with the snakes and birdies] If one more darn cat tracks muddy paw prints over my boat I will pay a bounty!  Boat is miles up in the air on a lift and they must crawl up the girders? They are also useless against Iguanas. I saw one hissing and running the other day (the cat that is).

Hey, Iguana killer, you are doing great. Keep up the good work. Instead of hundreds going out the canal we have to really look to see 25.  Get rid of all invasive species; and the iguana is #1.  Humans rule!

On the other hand, the fishing is just awesome.  It will be as good as it was in the 60s pretty soon. Today I caught fighting blues and delicious hogfish, monster yellowtail, thrashing macs and the unknown one that got away that all most broke the rod.  Thank you again God  Life is good!

Anna Nicole Smith’s body has been decomposing in a morgue. I want to see a picture please!

Debie, here is the link to Marks 40th Birthday Party. It was great time. Thanks. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fUHQk31yRhw 

Ms Thacker’s forced removal by diGennero from the Commission meeting is another reason it is not a good idea to go to Commission meetings. You get labeled as an activist and no one will listen to you. It’s a shame, but that’s how it is. I’d go to public meetings, but after you go to one meeting they stop listening to you. It's the same with emails and letters. If you write more then one they stop listening to you unless there's a check attached.

I’m glad there are people like Ms Thacker to protect us from our government. I think that the government, namely Mr DiGennero, should be the one to be removed. --goodby7@aol.com

I have the biggest crush on someone who doesn't know it and I want to jump this persons bones who's already being jumped by someone else so I will find someone else to have a crush on except those kinds are one in a million.  Chow-a-bello and chin-chin baby. 

Didn’t John Murphy (I think it was him) get evicted from a KW commission meeting and sue them and win a bunch of money? The only time someone should be evicted from a public meeting is if they’re disruptive and are obstructing the meeting. Not by a single comment or gesture. This isn’t elementary school, it’s a Democracy.

[Save our White House] Fast Bush impeachment.  Ladies, lets all shave on March 15, Remove The Bush Day.

It is a sad day in Monroe County when the audience or a person can not make a comment(s) when our Board of County Commissioner's take a vote and someone in the public displays a (thumbs down) silent comment and the Commissioner Mario DiGennaro has that citizen removed from the meeting by the Sheriff's office.  Am I living in a Free County or have I been transplanted to a Communist regime?

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Friday February 23, 2007

Thursday February 22, 2007

[Memories of Bum, the 70s] It was a great time to be here.  The lower Keys and Key West still had that "outpost-campish” feel and look.  There was quite a mix of people here:  Fugitives from the Rust belt. Hippies of course and the Bubbas, naturally.  The Bubbas had their own way of conducting any kind of business. It may have been aggravating at times, but it was generally harmless. 

You could shoot a canon down Duval in the summertime which was great, even if we were all starving, off season.

Everyone, especially the cops, looked the other way, regarding pot smuggling.  It was pretty blatant, sometimes with the law enforcement agencies actually helping to coordinate the loading and unloading of cargo.  It was illegal, but so many were doing it; particularly those in the fishing industry and others with access to boats that were otherwise not making much money during the recession. Some upstanding local families were involved and some not so upstanding. It seemed relatively safe.

That all changed with the switch to cocaine in the late 70's early 80's.  Guns and the wacky Columbians got involved. People started getting shot at and going to prison. My theory is the "Bubba Bust" occurred just about the time things were switching to cocaine.  The Feds may have seen the writing on the wall and stepped it up.

I suggest that all wildlife lovers email all of our politicians in support of wildlife. Our birds have evolved without non-native predators and suffer heavy losses due to predation by free-roaming house cats. Cats kill our snakes, rabbits, and many any other small creatures.  So keep your cats indoors or suffer the consequences of having them removed from where they don't belong. I only wish there was a bounty on them!  If cats were as vicious as dogs, there would be leash laws. Unfortunately, few people seem to care about wildlife and think only of themselves. Kudos to USF&W for caring.

Redneck border security.

[What happened] What happened is you broke the law. Look in the mirror. You built an illegal fence and committed fraud. A homestead exemption is for people who own property and live in it as their primary residence. I wonder if you have a homestead exemption at your real primary residence too.

I have a lot of old stories, but I’m afraid to print them because of the statute of limitations thing. Boy, those were the days!

[Code violators should go to jail] Get a life and keep your nose out of other peoples lives.  I know you are just so perfect, nice tempered and all.

I watched an interesting eco-program on global warming last night. It reported that a mere 18,000 years ago all of Canada and all of the northern half of the United States was covered in a massive ice sheet.  Then, as part of the planet’s natural cooling and warming cycles it began to melt.  So, it seems we have had “Global Warming” for about 18,000 or so years.  Of course those researchers whose life depends on the huge amounts of grant monies passed out to “study” this horrible crisis will tell us whatever is going to keep the cash cow (and their jobs) alive and well even though this warming cycle seems to have been going on for 180 centuries.  No doubt that the industrialized nations have contributed to atmospheric pollution to some extent, but to say, absolutely, that it is going to change the entire planetary system is just crapola.  This has become nothing but a political football.  Of course it does give Al Gore something to howl and wring his hands about in the absence of any original thought. 

Are your Crocs warped or out of their original shape?  I recently left mine in the trunk of my car with things on top of them.  When I removed them I was crushed...my beloved shoes were ruined.  I tried to wear them in their misshaped condition, no way.  I took my wife's blow dryer, put it on its highest setting and heated them for quite a while and, after some work re-shaping them, they are as good as new!

[Loud Music] What about that loud megaphone idiot in Venture Out? Can anyone do something about him waking the entire neighborhood every week end?

[Habitat workers] Damn, who cares? Personally, I’m to busy trying to make a living down here to worry about what their doing. This subject has been beaten to death.

[Bum Farto] Ya'll forgot to mention his red patent leather shoes.

[mind to be so open that thy brains fall out]  Certainly.  Just look at the people we have in elected office and those who want to be.  Hillary comes first to mind.

I am pretty darn sure I know the owner of Lucky's Landing. I'm also fairly sure he doesn't need more money than he has unless it's for his family. He has always been the kind of person who would rather beg (pay) for forgiveness than pay for permission here in this corrupted county. I hope he looks at things before making a permanent decision.

I heard thru the grapevine that our local Winn Dixie failed 3 major health code issues last week. I also heard Channel 10 news was filming in there. Coincidence?

[Code violators should all go to jail. Those low lives are stealing from our tax base and creating unsafe structures for all the waiters and strippers to live in]The waiters and strippers are making more money than the doctors and lawyers. 

It is school teachers, cops and fire fighters who are living in these down stairs apartments because they can't afford to live in a full house.  I hope the ass hole who is calling code enforcement has a grand child in school, but no teacher or has his house broken into, but there is no cop because they were thrown out of their down stairs apartment.

The Monroe County Sheriff removed Kay Thacker from the BOCC meeting for being out of order.

The owners of Lucky's Landing have owned that trailer park for many years. He owned it when the Jehovah Witness Hall was Ernie’s Island Woman. This past Hurricane destroyed all those trailers with many feet of water. All the people that own the trailers there are free to move their trailers anywhere else they choose to. Nobody keeps them there. Why is it that the long term owner of a multi home establishment can't do what is within his rights by county code because people that don't pay property tax don't like the idea? The condos he's planning do qualify as affordable housing and they will be hurricane safe. Unlike the portable travel trailers that are there now. This is just another complaint from the many people here that don't own anything and don't like anybody that has the fortitude to put down the beer and get a real job.

One quick way to reduce the amount of people living in The Habitat for Humanity homes and get these homes in the hands of people really in need is start drug testing them.  That will put an end to the people living there claiming to be disabled due to drug addiction.  It is sick to drive by the Habitat houses and see a BMW, a Cadillac or a Lincoln parked outside and the rest of us have to work for our Ford and can't get a house.

Being a drug addict, unwed mother or black is not a disability.

If you're shopping for new furniture, Don’t go to City Furniture.  If you have a problem, there is virtually no customer service.  My new sofa was delivered w/a bent frame, they took over 3 months to repair it and when the technician cracked 2 tiles in my floor, they said it's not their problem. --mayameyer@mail.com

[my daily Key Weird fix] http:// www.freewebs.com/keyweird/ Hey, fix the link - you didn't code it right. (Ed: Thanks for letting us know. Here's the new improved link. http://www.freewebs.com/keyweird/)

[Sloan is a fine manufacturer of quality urinals and toilets, and unfortunately a blog]  I read each posting several times before it goes out, and a time or two afterwards. This writer was the second person in a week's time to connect my name with the Sloan toilet valve. I often tell people that Sloan is spelled like the toilet valve, although no family resemblance. Although not particularly pleasant, piss are vinegar are part of human existence and left unattended start backing up into the house.

Has anybody notice how much the crime rate has gone up since the introduction of the Keys shuttle bus, or is it just my imagination?

[FKAA bilingual preferred] If you think that a white, taxpaying, American citizen can't be bilingual, you are being discriminated against because of your ignorance.  But, even that kind of discrimination shouldn't be tolerated.

Fat Jack, that was a  great Daytona 500 party!

With respect to those who used to get tattoos, don’t forget criminals.

Thanks for the Bronson Arroyo info.  He is well liked in his pitching town.

Guess what the back of the "where is Bum Farto?" t-shirt says?

(?)Deception: Your way of life. What precious stone thou are. It’s a turtle’s race.

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Thursday February 22, 2007

Wednesday February 21, 2007

To the person or people who are 'jealous' of the free vacation the Habitat for Humanity volunteers get, may I make a suggestion?  Why don't you sell your home, and buy an RV.  Then you can park you RV at Habitat for a daily fee, which covers some of your expenses like your pump out. (I think you referred to that as 'illegal dumping' and 'free')  Then you can work 5 days a week, 8 hrs a day, painting, drywalling, swinging a hammer, washing walls, tearing up floors or walls, mold remediation, debris cleanup or any other job that needs done, in many cases regardless of the weather.  All this for no pay!  At the end of the day, you can return to your living quarters where there is no TV, or other amenities that the average person is accustomed to having.  If you do this, you won’t have to be jealous anymore.  You can have all they have and more.  You at least would have friends and family to be with and let's not forget the sacred Winn-Dixie card!  If this isn't palatable I suggest you go outside, pull up a chair on  your deck, open a Corona, enjoy the sunset and just chill out.  Don't worry about if someone is getting more than you.  Enjoy today while it is here.  Isn't this the spirit of the Keys?

What’s gets that guy with the “Govwatch” email address so worked up? Doesn’t he like anything? I think the County must have refused him a building permit or called Code Enforcement on him. He seems to have a vendetta.
 –usa33043@yahoo.com

[Left footed or right?] My friend said the way you can tell which footed you are is to stand up straight and let someone try to push you over backwards. The foot you extend behind you first is what foot you are. I’m right-footed.

Gee, I thought the peanut butter/illegal alien thing was kind of cute and clever.   I guess didn’t realize what a sick mother I really was.

[spot the thief] "Who's the more foolish: the fool, or the fool who follows him?" --Obi-wan Kenobi

[Neck Tattoo] Hey, I’m not that Fat!

The Brits are pulling most of their troops from Iraq. So are the Danes. Bush says that's a good sign because the area they were serving is safer. He failed to mention why he is sending in more troops.

Do the Habitat workers have valid Monroe contractor’s licenses as required by law?  Meaning they will follow code and have insurance.

Looking at yesterday's “Kid Cars” photo I can imagine it would hurt like heck to fall down using one of those.

And very proud of it.

The ignorant people complaining about the free campground at Habitat for Humanity should themselves put 40 hours/week of volunteer time to help people in need. Yes, it's true that they are camping in the keys for free, if you call volunteering 8 hours a day "free". Enough of this, already.

Uno questione.  What does el jefé mean?  I didn't have any luck with my Spanish to English dictionary.  Is it perhaps another language? (Linguistics Dept: The Chief)

It’s so lame to say “It’s deja vu, all over again” What a worn out cliché.

It’s so lame to say “It’s deja vu, all over again” What a worn out cliché.

It’s so lame to say “It’s deja vu, all over again” What a worn out cliché.

Marathon has had its first commercial flight arrive in several years. I predict the carrier will be gone within six months for lack of business.

The FKAA is hiring a Customer Service Rep, “bilingual preferred”.  This isn’t the first time I’ve been discriminated against for being a white, taxpaying, American citizen.

Bronson Arroyo and his sister, Serenity, went to Sugarloaf School.  They were really nice kids and their parents were lovely also. Bronson was much blonder in the second grade.

Phu Ket, I'm moving to Thailand!

To Elle, who writes the Entertainment Calendar: Is it possible for you to include dates or at least give a range of dates?  Without dates, it's almost useless to me.  Thanks.

[open marriage] Oh, yea, I know she has sex with others. Hell, I shot the video a couple of times. Open means “open”.

I thought Jimmy Carter started Habitat for Humanity. Therefore I doubt it would be a non-profit organization. It's just that the books show  0 at the end of the day.

Where have all the iguanas gone. I couldn’t have killed them all, could I?

Happy Birthday to Me!

[“A new bar and grill should specialize in 10 varieties of pizza, burgers, wings, fish sandwiches, etc.)]  Gawd!  Nearly every joint down here has pizza, burgers, wings and fish sandwiches.  Could we please step up just a bit?  I would prefer a nice steak house atmosphere serving lunch and dinner with an attractive but simple menu featuring steaks, chops, a couple of seafood selections, a nice grilled chicken selection, a fresh daily soup, good salads, a nice cozy bar and cocktail lounge with an appetizer menu.  All priced to be sure the clientele is washed, deodorized, trimmed, shaven, shirted and shod.

Mira is a star that can change from practical invisibility to one of the brighter stars on the sky over the course of a year. Pictured is a castle in Stuttgart, Germany.

Hip Hop videos: Porn for beginners.

I agree 100% with passing a bill that requires the person who has a complaint to code enforcement to reveal their name.  How do we do this?

[Bum Farto] The posts brought back loads of memories from the 70s but nobody mentioned those red jumpsuits he used to wear along with the gold chains and mirrored shades. His wife used to bake for the public. Her birthday cakes, yellow with guava filling between the layers and white icing were "da bomb" (though we'd have never thought to call them that) back in the day.

There has been so much talk lately about code enforcement, affordable housing, bad neighbors, etc. Anyone who thinks the county has a real interest in affordable housing:  I have a bridge I would like to sell you. The county is no different than any government agency anywhere, revenue is their only objective.

My neighbor on Summerland has turned in almost everyone on Cruikshank Island to some agency for something or other. He has turned me into code enforcement for fence violations and other bs. He also said I didn't spend enough time in my home to qualify for a homestead exemption. My son teaches 3rd grade at Sugarloaf School and my daughter-in-law manages a business on Cudjoe. They live in the house 24/7/365. It was affordable housing for 2 great service workers who may now have to eventually leave. But the cheap, miserable, contribute-nothing-but-hate-pink-house-people will still be here to haunt you all. Where has the common sense and justice gone in this country? We came here to live, party and to take care of each other and help each other clean up after storms etc. It was a brotherhood, we were tight. What happened?

Here is a different way to play Tic-Tac-Toe. Check it out, it's fun!  Click here: Animax  Warning: this is addictive!

This is where I go for my daily Key Weird Fix! 
http://www.freewebs.com/keyweird/

Thanks for the Bum Farto update. I forgot about his car, "El Jefe'" and the T-shirt. It was a great time to be in the Lower Keys/Key West, before cruise ships and the Tourist Development Council.

Be there or lose the Lower Keys forever!  Your taxes will go sky high. Your property values will go down.  They will push you into the sea!

A large, multifamily condominium is being proposed to replace the Lucky's Landing mobile home neighborhood.  This will be the first large, market rate condominium in the in the Lower Keys for decades and will set a precedent for many, many more.

Unfortunately, as we, the citizens, are participating in the community master planning, the planning staff are  recommending approval of this first ever project.  Please express your displeasure at the next community planning workshop, go to the public hearing when it is scheduled and by sending a letter to the, Monroe County Planning Department,  2798 Overseas Highway, Marathon, FL 33050.

Please be certain to ask to have your letter included in the information that goes to the  Planning Commission for the Lucky's Landing public hearing.

If illegal aliens want to avoid all the horrible stuff described, there’s a great way to do so…stay home!

[Spot the Thief] The submitter didn’t steal your time. No one made you look.

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Wednesday February 21, 2007

Tuesday February 20, 2007

For the people wanting to know what Habitat has done lately, I suggest they ask the 130 + people whose homes and trailers were restored after Hurricane Wilma.  While they are at it, they can also ask the 600 homeowners who had shutters put on their houses.  As a matter of fact, Habitat volunteers were still putting up shutters on residences the day before Wilma hit.  Now they can ask the 15 +  families chosen for homes on Big Coppitt and Big Pine.  You can also find Habitat working in the background trying to save and promote the affordable housing in the Keys. What has Habitat done?  A lot more than anyone else in the community.  As far as it being a Christian organization, Habitat does not care what religion the recipients are.  It is a nonprofit, nondenominational Christian housing organization. It is founded on the principles of Christianity, but in no way forces its beliefs on anyone.  People helping people. 

[Bum Farto] He used to hand around the fire station when he was young and the fireman gave him that nickname. Eventually he became the fire chief. Then in the early 1970’s he discovered cocaine. He would drive around town in his white fire chief’s car with the darkest tinted windows you’ve ever seen and a license plate that read “El Jefé” and he always wore mirrored sun glasses. At that time the city of Key West was totally corrupt. The City attorney was the head of a big drug ring his father was the chief of police and the police would stand watch when they unloaded tons of pot off the local boats. Eventually, mostly due their arrogance and flashy lifestyles, the feds mounted an undercover operation called “Bubba Bust” (I think). Since Bum Farto was the weak link in the drug ring, he was made to "swim with the fishes” and never heard from again. Everyone thinks he was killed because he was too stupid to stay out of town if he ran away. It was the big story in the 70s. One of the most popular t-shirts on Duval St was the one that read “Where’s Bum Farto?”.

Code violators should all go to jail. Those low lives are stealing from our tax base and creating unsafe structures for all the waiters and strippers to live in.

Illegal aliens are being abused and murdered by their “guides” leading them into this country.  Border watch finds bodies in the desert daily of those who couldn't make the trip and were left behind.  If they do make it to a city, they're often held in captivity until their relatives can pay huge “ransoms” for their release.  There are news reports of houses stuffed full of hostages, locked up in horrendous conditions, at the mercy of their hired escorts.  Many are forced into prostitution until their captors can't make any more money from them.

Microsoft's USF flash manager is supposed to help you keep track of the contents of several flash drives you use regularly.  I have to admit I don't have that problem so I can't give it a fair test.

I’m a loud music lover, but I would never use ear phones because they feel like I’m in a capsule when wearing them. I like the full sound of my stereo and especially the kick ass vibration of my super sub woofer that can rattle my tooth. Rock on!

Phuket Gazette - online English newspaper for Phuket, Thailand, with queernews, daily news, classified ads, yellow pages, bus.. ...we are not alone

What a bunch of idiots you guys are. The thief in the picture was the cafe' charging $4.99 for a cup of coffee!

It be possible for thy mind to be so open that thy brains fall out.

Maybe I should have said, "Sloan is not alone?" The Earth Is Not Moving

Chrysler cutbacks spur rollout of short-term “Kid Kars”

[Habitat for Humanity] I just hate it when people escape the question asked by replying “call them and ask”. We don’t want to call them. We want some concrete detail of what they have done on this site. What projects have they done in this area after Habitat landing? I think that is what most people are asking. I also think people’s main concern (or beef) is the free campground in the back of their store. We all hate it and are jealous of people vacationing in the Keys for free under the guise of “working’ a couple of hours a week.

Howard Livingston and The Mile Marker 24 band are arriving back in town back from finishing their new CD in Nashville and are planning a weekend party Keys style at Boondocks on Ramrod Key (mile marker 27.5). Friday night (February 23^rd) will be an intimate acoustic evening with Howard and the Mile Marker 24 gang and Saturday night (February 24^th) will feature the Mile Marker 24 Big Band. Both shows start at 7:00 PM and as always there will be giveaways, door prizes, a Limbo contest and they’ll fire up the old Johnson outboard margarita maker. For more information call 305-849-1927 or visit www.milemarker24.com

I love President’s Day. Did everyone get a BJ under their desk in honor of our countries leaders?

A bright new nova, Nova Scorpii 2007, is now visible to the unaided eye in the eastern early morning sky in the constellation of the Scorpion, just below Jupiter and Antares.  Novas are thermonuclear explosions casting off the outer layers of a white dwarf star.  This one will fade, but should remain visible with binoculars for a few more days.

I’m just a “skuzzy civilian with a base sticker” and have the day off with pay for President’s Day.  Take that Mr. Marine with the $2400 per month pension, the $222 a year medical, the commissary privileges, etc.  I look forward to getting my retiree friends “lickered up” so I may have a loaf of bread and pack of turkey for lunch.  You are an embarrassment to all true military retirees who appreciate what they are rightly entitled to.

[Your Honor, my client is an idiot] Dan Gulley Jr., 70, and David Brooks Jr., 62, fought in January in Alabama, and according to police, Gulley pulled out a gun and shot Brooks. The two were arguing over how tall the late singer James Brown was.

To the guy with the wife who rents a high end escort and has bi-sexual experiences with other women and him. Would you be as happy if your wife asked you to have a bi-sexual experience with the other man (or men) in her life?  Do you set her up with other men like she sets you up with other women?  Are you so dazed and confused that you think your marriage is open because you have sex with other women?  You really don’t believe that she doesn’t have sex with other men do you?

[Airlines] I cannot believe these airlines lack of respect for human well being. If I was stuck on a plane on the runway for over four hours I would raise such a ruckus they would throw me off and put me in an airport detention center. A place I would rather be. If not I would open a hatch on the wing and slide down the blow up slide and run around the tarmac like a chicken with its head cut off. That’s my $.02.

I remember Bum Farto, aka El Jefé, well.  I contracted for the old First Federal and Bob Dion.  Both, now gone, had pretty foul mouths.

ReggieBibbs.com | JUST ASK!

I just had a nice conversation Miss Anne Morkill, Refuge Manager, Florida Keys National Wildlife Refuge and there is misinformation already regarding the eradication of the feral cats on Big Pine and No Name.  There is not a bounty of $100 per cat collected and the cats are not going to be sent directly to the gas chamber for eradication. They will be taken to our local shelters for adoption possibilities.  If anyone has any questions you are free to call her directly and there will be press releases on this whole topic.

Hey, Soan!  Straighten this guy out, would you? Time Cube He provides his emal at the end.

[Spot the Thief] I found the real thief! It was the submitter, he stole my precious time. I want my 30 seconds back after looking at that stupid picture.

The only reason this dude is not in Iraq or Afghanistan is because this dude is 63 years old and can't do the things he did at 33. But if I was still on Big Pine I could still kick your pencil neck ass. I have had my baptism of fire and stood my ground! What have you done? Soldier of Fortune is nothing more than a trade magazine, and if you think being a soldier is not a trade than you are sadly mistaken. Just like among lawyers, doctors, plumbers, or mechanics there are bad soldiers too, but most of those die in time of conflict. It doesn't take any courage to mess with the bull while the bull is in the pen!

Why don't you just go and play with your squirt gun and be grateful that I'm far away! 

Free Peanut Butter Sandwiches to all Illegals. I have a heart. But I have worked and paid taxes my entire life, served in the military, supported a family, raised children and now support my elderly parents. (so much for “no soul”). My father was an immigrant as were my grandparents. The difference is that they became US Citizens as fast as they could and you had better not say anything against the USA to them. They loved this country and I do. Illegals don't come here for any other reason, but to make money and send it back to where they come from. We pay for the services they use like hospitals, police, schools and more. I welcome any immigrant that wants to become a citizen—not illegals. Keep making the sandwiches.

The answer to the code enforcement issue is to press law-makers into passing a bill that requires the name of the person with the complaint to be public. The anonymous tip or call is B.S.  The unknown caller or complainer is just a tool for the enforcement officer. I should have, I mean, I do have the right to face my accusers.

[Hershey Foods] You can thank the unions for the job cut.  They continue to extort, threaten, and blackmail for pay raises and benefits that most people would give their left arm for. 

Minority report. As I told my human mother in a dream in late 2004, "Kindness, mercy and generosity are the keys to the kingdom of God, and the Puritan way leads to hell." The next night in my sleep, I was told, "Thinking and figuring things out have done all the good they can do, and future progress must come through the Holy Spirit and Eve."

From the moment you step out of your home, I can legally snap photos of you and publish them.  However, snapping pictures of you naked in your bathroom is illegal.  The Code Enforcement narcs (there seem to be so many of these miserable little people) cannot sue you because you're telling the truth and have evidence substantiating your claim.  Bring on their photos and their names, but be prepared for Editor to post your e-mail address.  

[Feds to eradicate cats and kittens on No Name and Big Pine Key] From what I understand, the cats they get will be put down. if there are phone numbers on the collars the trapper may call, but are not required. He will get $100 for each cat caught, and they will be euthanized because the shelters are over crowded. Whiskers & Paws Forever of Monroe County has asked for more time because it costs $300 to relocate each cat to the out of town sanctuary, but U.S. Fish & Wildlife have said no.

I placed a call to them to see what the procedure and policy is going to be so we can protect our own pet cats.  I will advise you all of their response.

Please email letters to all of the commissioners stating your feelings against the trapping and killing of the homeless cats and kittens on Big Pine and No Name Keys by U.S. Fish & Wildlife (especially Commissioner George Neugent and Mayor Mario DiGennaro). We have asked U.S. Fish and Wildlife to postpone the trapping until we can find a place for the cats, but they are being inflexible and will begin trapping starting in April. Trapping and killing these cats and kittens is cold-hearted, immoral and unnecessary. Please send your email as soon as possible. Remember, the greatness of a society is judged by the way it treats its animals.

New Mario T-shirts on Sale --Govwatch05@netscape.com

Why would a gargantuan, chain smoking woman with a bad, dried-up perm get a blue neck tattoo?  Eh?   

BitchKeyWest.com wants 5 bucks a month to continue using their board.  Ha, ha the jokes on you.  He should pay me to read the crap that is on that board!

I remember Bum Farto from my youth near Key West.  What a character.  He always dressed to the 9s, ala gold chains, 70's style. He talked real fast in that particular Key West, Bahamian Bubba way.  Sure didn’t look like a fire chief. Was anything ever found of him?

Does anyone have any recollection or memories to share of Bronson Arroyo when he lived on BPK?  He is a major league pitcher now.

(?)ask manny

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Tuesday February 20, 2007

Monday February 19, 2007

Congratulations to Donna from Boondock's and her husband Mark.  Sunday morning Donna gave birth to a bouncing baby girl, little Georgia.  Mother and Child are doing quite well.  Father is still recovering!  We love you Donna!

I made a point to personally meet the guy (Jim) who's been puttin' around Eden Pines in that little boat.  He had no hesitation in telling me his name and Eden Pines street address.  I explained to him how "popular" he was with our sub-division.  Huh, no surprise to him.  He seems harmless, and certainly without a doubt he knows Eden Pines is paying attention.

To further answer the noise ordinance question, it is unlawful to start making noise prior to 8 am.  This time applies to every day of the week.  I don't think the cops detest enforcing this; or they don't understand, like someone else said.  I would assume noise complaints take least priority when there are multiple calls.

[Another nail in the American coffin] Hershey Co. will cut 1,500 jobs, or about 11 percent of its work force. The largest U.S. chocolate maker also said it would outsource production of some products and would build a cost-efficient manufacturing plant in Monterrey, Mexico.

Sloan is a fine manufacturer of quality urinals and toilets, and unfortunately a blog.  Yet they both seem to capture useless human by-product.  Unlike a blog however, a Sloan toilet removes the waste so that the next person is not exposed to its volatility.  After that, it has a process of decomposition so that seemingly useless human waste can be treated and returned to the ground.  Cyber space just can’t seem to offer this type of useful recycling.  Survival books say that using cloth as a filter, human effluent can be filtered and used in conditions where water is not available.  I wonder if he rereads his writings.

[Self-tread a heart attack] Without help, the person whose heart is beating improperly and who begins to feel faint, has only about 10 seconds left before losing consciousness. However, these victims can help themselves by coughing repeatedly and very vigorously. A deep breath should be taken before each cough, and the cough must be deep and prolonged, as when producing sputum from deep inside the chest.

A breath and a cough must be repeated about very two seconds without let up until help arrives, or until the heart is felt to be beating normally again.

I didn’t know Habitat for Humanity was a Christian organization. That concerns me right off the bat.

A cat named Lucky.

Those saying a wife would not approve of an affair are just dumb. My wife always rents the services of a high end escort for my birthdays and has had several nice bi-sexual experiences with me and other women we have met. You Jesus freaks and monogamy freaks all should try an open marriage. Ours is 22 years now and still going strong!

To the loud music lover: Have you ever thought of headphones, that way everyone can have it their way.  And don't say let them use ear plugs. They are not imposing their quiet on you, you are imposing your noise on them. 

For those of you who would like information about what Habitat for Humanity is doing, can call them at 305-872-4456.  I am sure they would love to hear from you and answer all your questions.  All the others can simply walk next door and ask them.  I am sure they would like to talk to you, too.

I went to the movies yesterday afternoon, maybe for the last time. There is now only one matinee before 3 p.m.  The tickets are up to nine dollars each and we don't even have to get into the price of snacks.  This shows what happens when there is a monopoly on anything in a town. 

There were several children in the movie which was from Disney, but was not keeping their attention.  They were allowed to talk at length and others were fidgeting and walking around the theater.  During all of this, not one of the parents, of the dozen or so offending children spread about the theater, had even bothered to shush their child. 

I now know that I am getting old.  Any time that you say,  “When I was their age I wouldn't even have thought about…” It starts to show your age. Since there is no way to get today's poor excuses for parents to start disciplining their children, and I can't even imagine the theater policing like the ushers of old, I guess it is going to be Netflix or Blockbuster form now on. 

Download details: Microsoft USB Flash Drive Manager (Standard) (Lousy Tech Support: Someone sent in this link, but I’m not sure what it’s for as a flash drive already shows up when you plug it into your USB slot. Just go to My Computer and the flash drive is listed right there with your hard drive and burner drive. If you want to see what’s in it just double click on the drive letter and it will open and you can see all its contents.)

[Habitat is an ecumenical Christian housing organization] Isn't this the way these sneaky bastards work, by infiltrating an area, buying up properties, conning "believers" out of money, and doing the same crap the Missionaries did, who destroyed populations all over the world?  Dog, I hate organized religion! --billpatberit@comcast.net

There is now a new official website where you can look up anyone's driver’s license complete with his or her photo. This information is now available to the general public, not just law enforcement. Give it a try. The web site is www.license.shorturl.com

(?)It takes a real man to admit he is wrong, and a rat to continue on with his ill ways. Shall we say, "mileage and meters", less we fall...

[Free Peanut Butter Sandwiches to all Illegals] To that comment: Cold, cold, cold. Do you have a heart? I know you don’t have a soul, you are a mere shell. Have they (illegals) been drinking or taking your beer and liquor away from you?

Deer Ed, If the residents of Ramrod Key and surrounding areas all photograph the Code Enforcement caller will you post the pictures?  I would start looking for these ass holes if you will help us expose them.

How come the Soldier of Fortune dude isn't in Afghanistan or Iraq blowing up bad guys?   That magazine, by the way, is one sick-o read for numbskulls who have a testosterone problem.

Freebie chew toy for Fido. Greenies.com - Welcome

BigPineKey.com readers are smart. You can't be fooled. Even though the editor isn't that smart, many of you caught the thief.

[Spot the thief]   Yes it the lady with her back to us in the chair with the security tag still on the back of the shirt.  Guess that tell us how well that stuff really works.

I spotted the thief instantly.  It is the anti-theft tag on the back of her shirt.  Come on people you all can do better that that.

In the picture "can you spot the thief" the woman at the table has the plastic security tag on the back of her dress/shirt that department stores place on items to keep people from shop lifting. 

In the spot the thief picture, try looking at the woman sitting in the black chair.  What's that anti-theft device hanging on the back of her shirt collar?

[Spot the Thief] The woman in the foreground has one of those plastic inventory control tags still attached to her printed blouse--it's hanging out the back. I think that is what made her the thief.

The thief was the lady with the shirt on with the white (do not steel tag I will turn your clothes blue of dye them with something if you take me off) so she has stolen the shirt and left the tag on.  That's my guess.

[Spot the Thief]  Uh...the clue was the big detection device still attached at the neck of the back of the dress the woman is wearing.

Look at the back of the lady sitting in the chair for the thief.  She has one of those tags, that squirts ink when you remove it yourself on the back of her dress.

[spot the thief] Look at the back of woman's shirt.

[Who’s the thief] Didn't anyone see the plastic gizmo on the back of the woman's dress?

[Spot the Thief] Personally I think it was the fat woman sitting down with the inventory tracker still attached to the back of her blouse.

Wasn’t the thief the fat person with the anti-shoplifting device still attached to the back of their shirt?

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Monday February 19, 2007

Sunday February 18, 2007

Chinese New Year. Ding Hai

This is affordable housing! Approval of 18 applicants for new homes to be built on Big Coppitt. Your post sounded so hopeful I went to the web site and was really impressed by Habitat--all private funding for construction and you have built more than 200,000 houses around the world.  It looks like a wonderful organization that shows that private funding surpasses government giveaways 100 to 1.  I bet you guys squeeze more out of a $1 than Washington sees out of $1,000.  Kudos!

Fact: Habitat is an ecumenical Christian housing organization. It is neither an arm of the government nor an arm of any church or denomination. It does not accept government funds for the construction of new houses or for the renovation or repair of existing houses. Habitat does accept government assistance for the acquisition of land or houses in need of rehabilitation. Habitat also accepts government help for streets, utilities and administrative expenses, as long as the funds carry no obligations that would limit Habitat's ability to proclaim its Christian witness.

Heck, I got a street to my house from the government.  Glad to find that there are 18 hard working deserving applicants out there that can take on the responsibility of a Habitat home.  You approved them and the county has just started approving building permits again in earnest and some people actually are getting a permit for a new home after waiting years on "the list".  What inquiring minds want to know is can you get any new permits approved to build them a house?  Has the organization also been on the list all this while waiting for approval?  Does the county give Habitat a helping hand approving permits?  Is it better to put a group of Habitat homes together, giving these achievers a sense of community.

OOps, I'll keep reading the site as I have far too many questions.

I am embarrassed to comment on the postings I have seen on this site lately. It seems that a lot of people have forgotten what the Florida Keys are all about. Thirty years ago it was about, in part, leaving mainstream America. The people I grew up with inspired me to love these islands for what they are. We live in a special place; the sun shines different on here. The people who like to compare the Keys to anywhere are chasing a chicken. Remember, you live here because you want to. Deal with it. I love it.

Free Monster Dodger game with classy graphics. Walt Disney Pictures' Bridge to Terabithia

I sympathize with the neighbor of the loud teen.  We’ve got one across the street with a similar situation; single Mom is out tending to her own social life, sometimes for days at a time, while the son is home throwing loud parties. The good news is that teens grow up and move away.  This too shall pass.

[Noise ordinance regulations] During the week he can use his equipment until 10pm from a noise ordinance stand point. On the weekends the night time ordinance does not go into effect until 11pm and New Years 1am. The day time ordinance is very open to the cop’s interpretation of an ordinance he probably doesn’t even understand. I would invite your neighbor up for a beer and ease into this topic. If you can’t find any common ground no one will have any fun.

[She never knew about my affairs, but I think if she had she would have approved] I firmly believe I am safe in saying, "She would not".

Thanks for the link to the Alabama driving contest.  It was the best laugh I've had in a good while!

[Royboy's Studebaker] The picture shown was a late 50's Golden Hawk that looks to be a street rod.  Mine was a Stock 62 Hawk GT. 

After 15 years without a car I have very recently acquired a suitable replacement.  Although it's not a Studebaker,  it's not a bad ride.  I seem to have a thing for "Orphan Cars" (cars no longer built).  Check out my '66 NASH (AMC) Ambassador!  Fresh stock v8 engine, auto transmission and running gear. Any repairs were with NOS parts.  Original paint, factory air, p/s. p/b, and AM radio that works! 25MPG Hwy. Bought at super price,  from collector with too many Nash's (3 still in garage).  --Royboy

It seems to me that all the people who knock porn are the one's who watch it the most; probably because they are just jealous and frustrated!? Maybe Siggy Freud was right after all!

George W. Bush is an inspiration. There's no 12-step program for stupid.

[calling code enforcement] It's easy to get back at them. Just report them to the IRS. They'll be in deep shit for years!

Does anyone know where all that re-bought peanut butter goes? I'd like to buy a couple of them. One user said that it will make you lose 7 pounds. That's better than TrimSpa, Slimfast and Methadone, which makes you dead in a hotel room.

This is to both of you guys who answered my post. We can argue back and forth why the US invaded Iraq. I don't agree with you for the simple reason that Saddam was given an ultimatum to leave the country. The invasion began after that ultimatum ran out. You would call Saddam’s rule a legit government. The man’s hero was Stalin, the biggest mass murderer in written history and we all know he tried to emulate him. I was happy when the Gulf of Tonkin resolution came to being. I hate communism. I had the displeasure to live under that system. Have you? The soldiers who went to resist the communist octopus did a good thing and I thank them. I did not agree the way the war was conducted politically.

You are right, I am not a highly educated person. I am not a war lover, but neither am I a pacifist. I believe that if you mess with the bull, be prepared to get the horn! The dudes you mentioned all needed to be chopped. Americans should be ashamed how it treated it's native peoples I have never watched FOX news. Just to show you how wrong can you be, I was 13 years old when I was first shot at on the Austro/Hungarian border when I was escaping communism. I served 3 years with the 101st. Airborne! Ol’ Miss didn't count as combat. In 1976 I volunteered for a combat assignment and served 3 years with the S.A.S

I have been in Soldier of Fortune magazine and in a book titled "The Elite" Just that you don't think this is bull crap, ask Bob Blackistone aka. Buzzy or Joe Britz, Mike Laudacina or Mary Vilfong they all live on Big Pine. Never bet until you know the tate!

[Spot the Thief] Can you find the thief in this picture?  No. (Ed: We couldn’t find the thief either. I think someone was pulling our eye.)

I have a feeling the poster cheering the virtues of Habitat lives in their free "campground".

Linda Ann at the No Name Pub. I would like to wish you a happy birthday! All ways loved you. Hope to see you on Sunday your birthday.

Regarding noise regulations, loud music, contractor air compressor etc: Most, if not all, Monroe County ordinances are available on line.  Most communities, including Monroe, do have ordinances concerning loud music, operation of construction equipment, barking dogs etc.  The catch is usually getting someone to enforce it.

Persistent, respectful calls to code enforcement usually do the trick, although sometimes you may get the run around.  My advice is to check the regulations online and call code when the noise is occurring.  This is usually covered on your right to "quiet enjoyment" of your residence. 

Keep calling until you get someone to come out and talk to the offender.  If the county person is good at handling these types of issues, they will point out to the offender that once the process has started, they will get a barrage of letters from the County and a time frame in which to respond.  The eventual outcome is in court. The plan being to get the offender to comply from the friendly chat.

Sometimes this works and sometimes it doesn’t.  You can also bring the Sheriff's Department into the mix if it is happening at night or before code is open.  But law enforcement usually detests enforcing noise type ordinances even more than code.  This is just my experience.  Good luck!

Numismatists are in Pig heaven this Chinese New Year because of the brand new dollar coin. It’s lighter than carrying 4 quarters and works well in vending machines.

[guy casing houses in Eden Pines canals] I love it because I find most people are looking out for neighbors and strangers alike in Eden Pines--at least at my little corner. But something really funny did happen the other day.  All of a sudden a boat coming in revved up way too much and we all went rushing to the windows to see what was going on and it was just so great that the captain raised his hands and said in a, calm, loud enough to hear, voice, "OK folks no problem here everything is OK,  settle down" and I just howled as I saw curtains and panels and eyes everywhere, just like he did. And I think that is just great and if I was "casing the joint" methinks that would be just a little intimidating!  What is so great is that most people are looking to see if they can throw or catch a rope and help out. 

And to the poster that sent in the picture, better safe than sorry and we all had a chance to be on the lookout.

Across the canal from me, a large house is being constructed.  The seemingly non-stop construction can be very annoying.  But, it doesn't hold a candle to someone playing loud music.  I can sympathize with the guy having his windows rattled.  It sounds like his teenage annoyance is responding to him here too.

30 dead, 120 hurt in car bombings in Baghdad today. Yesterday the Prime Minister was saying how the new security measures in that city are working.

Bum Farto and Mr. Stinkypants fell in love and moved down to Key West to open a B&B.  They make a perfect couple.

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Sunday February 18, 2007

Saturday February 17, 2007

I wish the poster who wondered what Habitat for Humanity has done since  building Habitat Landing had been at Wednesday night's Board Meeting.  Approval of 18 applicants for new homes to be built on Big Coppitt was just one of the items on the agenda.  During the meeting, some of the applicants were notified that they had been approved for a home  -- it was inspiring to hear their responses.

Habitat does not build homes for the homeless -- they do build houses for hard working families and individuals who will perform 350-500 hours of sweat equity for their new homes. It's a hand up, not a hand out. 

Also, Habitat has been extremely busy (especially since Wilma) helping homeowners (who are unable to do so on their own) repair storm damaged homes, etc.  The money from the home store helps pay the expenses to do these repairs and provides seed money to build new homes.  Much of the materials sold at the store are left over or used building materials that might otherwise wind up at the dump.  It's a wonderful kind of recycling. 

Working with Habitat is an awesome experience.

[Loud music] I got your goat, bad. Cry me a river. I have a little violin I'll play just for you sweetly.

[US Destroyed Iraq] The US did destroy that country. There are more ways to ruin a country than by destroying villages. We destroyed their government. We destroyed their military. We destroyed their social order. We invaded Iraq to remove the threat of WMD--that's it. Our main goal was not to remove Saddam. You cannot rewrite history because your histerical (I know I spelled it wrong too, although I did like your line about the “Shits and Sushis.”)

I do thank the  pre-Vietnam soldier for my freedom, but since that time our soldiers have done nothing to improve our freedom. Don't kid yourself. Vietnam nor Iraq has done anything positive for our nation--quite the opposite is true. As Americans, we should support our soldiers, but not their mission in Iraq.

[The American dream is alive and well] George W. Bush is an inspiration to all our youth. He proved that anyone can be President.

[Now, that’s big news] Britney Spears’ shaved head has bumped Anna Nicole from the top headline.

Does anyone know what the noise ordinance regulations are in Monroe County? I'm looking to find out the times that one can run machinery in a residential area, for example, air compressors and construction type equipment like saws, etc. I have a new tenant living downstairs from me, and it seems he's running his construction business from there. While I understand the need to be able to make a living (I'm struggling just like everyone else), an air compressor that sounds like it's in my living room is no fun at 9 or 10 in the evening. I figure before I say something I might regret, it might be a good idea to know if I've got a right to ask him to shut it off.

Lost: a pair of ladies prescription sun glasses on the 7th of Feb in the area of Winn Dixie, Moose or No name Pub. A reward is offered. If found please call 515-2955.

To The Ranting Iraq War Lover, Chill out dude. Take a pill. You can't go around shooting up and taking out people just because they might not agree with your vision of how the world should be.  Can you say Diem, Allende, Pinochet, Peron, American Indians, Grenada, Panama, and many other examples that don't come to mind?  Using profanity in your post to describe another person just paints you as the uneducated, FOX licking slob you probably are. And I'll bet you never volunteered for combat if you were even in the military at all.

The awful truth.

[bridge "Pont Neuf" in Toulouse] It was refreshing to see a picture from a cultural location like that.

Remember the guy casing houses in Eden Pines canals on his Jon Boat?  It seems that once his photo was posted on here he either got scared and stopped or someone got pissed and put a stop to him.  I think we should all drive around looking for the Code Enforcement Nazi who is reporting everyone and post his and/or her picture here and any other public place we can.  It appears that Ramrod is his stomping grounds and Breezeswept Beach now has a public forum website.  Let’s post their pictures there so all the neighbors can see the face of the dick-head living in our community.  In the Law of The Jungle, let’s clean house like the lions do.

Injade is playing at the Looe Key Tiki Bar tonight, Saturday, February 17th, so come on down for the fun party, and some great rock 'n roll!

[She never knew about my affairs, but I think if she had she would have approved]  She is probably rolling over in her grave.  Approve?  Geez, man, women like their men to be faithful not running around with whores contracting god only knows what kind of diseases.  Disgusting.

 We will be giving out free, yes, that is free peanut butter sandwiches to all illegals.  No social security number required. (Maybe this is the start of solving our immigration problems.)

CyberMatrix Clipboard Magic: Freeware Windows Clipboard Extender Software

"I found out that they can't sell you a gun while you're crying." - Advice on divorce

My dog is my best friend, he does not deceive, nor hurt me...but loves/protects me…I have a best friend too, who is very real. --Lympbisquit

[Infamous person calling code enforcement] There is one on every Key. Have some fun with them. It’s something to do on the cold gloomy days of winter.

[new escort service] Where have I been, I haven't heard anything about it?

[The south is alive and well] This is a great video showing a little driving contest through Alabama by some English fellows. They wouldn't dare try this in the Keys. http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=3679664434988646531&q=top+gear+rednecks&hl=en

[Spot the Thief] Can you find the thief in this picture?

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Saturday February 17, 2007

Friday February 16, 2007

When I grew up the American flag was respected. You never let it fly in the dark. Now they passed a law if a light shines on it at night it’s ok to let it fly 24 hrs a day. As I look at the flags I see at banks, post offices and other buildings I see damaged and neglected flags. We should go back to lowering the flag at sunset and raising it at sunrise. Maybe people would look at the flag and give it the respect it should have. As I see it's another way of being lazy and teaching children to be lazy and have no respect for anything. This law should be repealed.

Overheard in the Dockside bar: "I'm still married to my wife because neither one of us want custody of the kids"

I'm the one who wrote in about the loud music.  It was my first time commenting on the subject, so I don't know what you are talking about with your ignorant assumptions.  I didn't realize local issues weren't allowed here.  Are we only allowed to talk about politics or looney-ass dreams? 

First of all, the neighbor with the loud music lives four houses down from me and the bass still rattles my windows.  Second, he is 18 years old, lives with his single father, and acts up when dad is out of town, which is quite often.  They let their dog run loose, shitting in everyone's yard, and the kid tears up and down the street on a crotch-rocket.  Conversations with both the father and son have been pointless.  And, no one on my street enjoys listening to rap music and having their houses rattled.  So, in answer to your second ignorant question.  My neighbors agree with me.  In fact, they have reported him more than I have.  It's a shame I had to justify this.  Maybe you should go back and read my first comment a little more closely, because I do believe I mentioned talking to them did not work.  My mortgage and insurance payments are way too high to allow this kind of behavior in an otherwise quiet and safe neighborhood.     

People are confusing F.A.I.R. with F.I.R.M. I don't know what FAIR is but FIRM is Fair Insurance Rates For Monroe.  Anybody who cannot appreciate what FIRM has done for us should remove his or her head from the appropriate orifice.

[Family Style BBQ place] We already have one; it's called Big Pine Coffee Shop. Try the He Man Platter, even Big Bertha would have trouble eating it all and its finger licking good.

[Invest in Apple Computer ASAP]  Apple Computer reported today that it has developed  computer chips that can store and play music inside women's breasts. The iBoob is considered to be a major breakthrough because women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts and not listening to them!

My wife can’t get enough of the Anna Nicole mess. I’m so uninterested and just don’t get it.

What happened to all the stuff about the Planning Commission and those two companies who are being paid enormous amounts to "redesign" the Lower Keys?  Did everyone forget we are about to be "Profiteered" into oblivion? Oh, I see, it's been over three days and our memory retention is only that long right?

[Cool guy who stopped his truck to help turtle cross street] This photo is of his brother.

[Where is Bum Farto?] Playing cards with Jimmy Hoffa.

Who ever told you that the Publix project at KDs is still a go is absolutely wrong.

Don't believe anything you hear, and only half of what you see.

[Hot Football] This looks better than any NFL football I've ever seen. 

[paranoid as Wednesday’s poster]  Oh Dear, please read the post a little closer!  I think you are talking about FIRM and I do not think they take in 4 million a year in donations and government grants.  I was talking about the other poster who thought FAIR was a good thing against immigration.  Get the old head out of the clouds and take off the rosy glasses and see that it was a comment on an entire different subject.  Whew!

The Ziploc omelet sounds really great. Goodness knows I can use all the cooking help I can get! Recipes

[new restaurants] Stop trying to change the laid back uniqueness we have.  Square Grouper fills my need for fine dining.

I got the best laugh today reading this site that I have had in the history of the site.  The "Ass Hole" watching us picture was great.  Is this a portrait of the jerk off who has been calling Code Enforcement?  Santa can retire Rudolph and take on the one eyed ass to guide his path.  Just when I needed a break from work. I read this site every day and laugh away.

Federal government not requiring permits for work on federal property] The federal government does need to follow local code requirements and get the necessary permits to do work on federal property.  Whoever said they didn't is wrong.  Unlike the City of Key West, NAS Key West has already spent over $1M on the necessary permits and environmental impact processes to cut mangroves and restore the airfield to Navy safety guidelines.  If anything, the federal government needs to be more careful and follow the rules more before work is done.  If you're wondering about work being done in the Key Deer Refuge, I recommend starting your search in their offices in the Winn Dixie Plaza.

[Only in America] Half way thru the FOX news show The O'Reilly Factor, Bill O'Reilly tried to insult the "liberal media" for keeping Anna Nicole’s story in the headlines. Guess who the very first story he covered was about when opening the show? Yup, Anna Nicole. The King has no clothes. FOX has turned into another tabloid network.

We're getting a puppy!  We're getting a puppy!  Yay!

I'm aiming this at the second posting from yesterday, Feb 15. Yes, you, you stupid CENSORED, what are you talking about the US destroying Iraq? Not even close to it. I don't think you ever saw a destroyed country, you bleeding heart CENSORED. Germany was destroyed so was Japan. The Iraqis are destroying Iraq themselves, instead of getting behind their government and giving it a chance. From the beginning they started murdering each other because one is Shit the other Sushi. I know that's incorrect spelling. They are both shit to me. The US armed forces went in to Iraq for one reason. To take down Saddam what he had or didn't have is beside the point. There was no destruction of villages or towns. The thieves and looters did more damage than the US armed forces.

Do you go to the church of your choice, read what you want to read, dress any way you want or listen to the music of your choice, than thank a soldier. Are you sure that you are an American and not some illegal from Panama with a case of sour grapes because of Pineapple face? I hope the US will take out Hugo Chavez soon!

Is the famous person calling code enforcement the couple who I see all the time driving around Ramrod in the big white pick up with the diesel engine?  He always has a ball cap on and she is in the passenger seat writing down addresses?  I think they live down behind Ramrod Chevron.  I saw them on Jamaica Lane a couple days ago video taping someone fixing their fence and then she dialed a call.  I mooned the assholes.  People like that need to move to New York or better yet, move to Iraq.

[clean and sterile restaurant] My husband services a lot of restaurant kitchen equipment and while I won’t mention the unsanitary places he has seen, he said the Stuffed Pig in Marathon is spotless.

As I have said before you need a porno site for your eyes only.

[Fund NPR and PBS] I sure hope our government funds these two independent networks because I can’t take much more of this Anna Nicole stuff.

To tell you right up front, there are enough pictures of half-naked young girls in disgusting poses and all other porno crap. In the long run, everybody thinks Americans all are sex-obsessed. From now on I am only forwarding pictures from old monuments, nature and other educational, cultural sights which may be a wake-up-call for the mind. Therefore, here’s a picture of the bridge "Pont Neuf" in Toulouse, France.

Immigration and Naturalization Service is trying to recall 5 million illegal dishwashers, but not so's you'd notice.

Peter Pan Peanut Butter that starts with serial number 2 1 1 1 is tainted and making people sick.  Throw out that batch.  I lost seven pounds after having a toasted PB & J with some milk. 

Does anyone know about the underground in Denmark?  If you do please explain.

I just wanted to add my two cents worth to the discussions on our new escort service now that it has been around for awhile.  I have tried it and the girls are beautiful and classy.  They treated me not only courteously, but kindly and attended to my needs in a very loving and respectful way.  For those who find this beneath them, I would just say: to each his own and let's try to not to be judgmental.  Prostitutes supply a great demand that some (most) men can't find at home for a wide variety of reasons.  I'm not married, but I was before my wife died of cancer.  I can truthfully say that the few times that I visited a prostitute while I was married did not hurt our marriage.  In fact, it helped it enormously, because it allowed me to get what I needed and thus wasn't resentful that my wife just couldn't give that to me.  She had many wonderful attributes, but wild sex just wasn't in her.  She never knew about my affairs, but I think if she had she would have approved.

There was recently a question about what happened to Chaka Chandler.  What was his crime? Arrest Record
(ED: OPERATE WHILE SUSP/CANC/REVOKED, FRAUD-INSUFF FUNDS CHECK - MAKE UTTER ISSUE 150 DOLLARS OR OVER, DUI ALCOHOL OR DRUGS 1ST OFF. Other than that he was a law abiding guy.)

[Restaurant concept]. If I ever opened another restaurant I would only serve Ham, turkey, meatloaf, chicken. I would cook them whole, strip the meat, use the rest for soup and serve dinners and sandwiches on home made bread and rolls. And an outrageous chef’s salad.

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Friday February 16, 2007

Thursday February 15, 2007

[FAIR is way too right wing whacko for my thinking] I’m glad I’m not as paranoid as Wednesday’s poster; otherwise I wouldn’t be appreciative of the thousands of dollars FAIR’s efforts have saved me. I think the writer should pay the higher insurance rates if he mistrusts them so much.

I saw this again on Fox “Our soldiers are protecting America in Iraq.”  They are not protecting America. When we invaded they were there to protect America, but once we realized the reason for our invasion was in error--their mission changed. They are there to help a country we destroyed. We must stay there out of moral obligation--not to protect us. Our soldiers are dying in Iraq to protect Irag and our sullied reputation. Don't perpetuate false reasoning.

One of the quickest ways of curing a hangover is to make a banana milkshake, sweetened with honey. The banana calms the stomach and, with the help of the honey, builds up depleted  blood sugar levels, while the milk soothes and re-hydrates your system.

[30 year Marine]  I believe you just earned the Jackass of the Year award! I bet you came to Key West in an RV too. I can tell because of you’re cheap comments. Thank you for your service, but the world does not owe you free everything for life. Get it jackass? If you don’t then climb back in your RV and go back to the mainland looking for a free all you can eat buffet.

There was recently a question about what happened to Chaka Chandler, Bill Hoebee's co-host on the Comcast News.  The attached mug shot may explain why he was gone the next day.

Pop stars and politicians are not the source of information on the pre-history of Earth. The ardent Al Gore sycophants keep flinging feces they've pulled out of their butts, call it science, and protect their smug, dogmatic ignorance. As H.L. Mencken said, "The believing mind is impervious to evidence - It rejects all overt evidence as wicked." It is surely proved out in these pages.

There are mountains of hard evidence that refute the global warming theory and stop it dead in it's tracks. The ease and deceit with which this evidence is being dismissed, is a sight to behold. It's as though decades of research in paleontology and geology are being completely ignored and/or erased. The ice and mud core samples that have been studied around the world for decades correlate, and the data is rock solid; global warming, as presented, is bull. Scientists and climatologists are scratching their heads over this political agenda that is getting ramrodded through and legislated. When data is presented that counters the so-called conventional wisdom, they are shouted down, punished and buried by the howling troop.

We are wasting time, energy and trillions of dollars while creating unnecessary fear and consternation over an issue with no scientific justification. For example, Environment Canada brags about spending $3.7 billion in the last five years dealing with climate change almost all on propaganda trying to defend an indefensible scientific position while at the same time closing weather stations and failing to meet legislated pollution targets.

Breezeswept Beach Estates on Ramrod Key announce the launch of their web site, www.bbeca.org.  The public viewing sections offer the history of Ramrod Key as well as helpful pointers on how to be a good neighbor in the Island Living section. The members only section is pass word secured.  Current members of the Breezeswept Beach Estates Civic Association have received their access information via e-mail. 

How is this for a restaurant concept? Up in the Detroit area there was a small diner that sold just three things; delicious humongous baked ham sandwiches, pea soup and bean soup, all at great prices.  They baked the hams right there in front of you and used the ham stuff in the soups. People lined up and the owner cleaned up.  He concentrated on one thing that nobody else was doing and did it great, consistently.  Easy for him and a treat for the customers.

To Tabatha: Happy Valentine Day. I love you, kaboom!

[We license fishing, but We can't license parenting] Samaritans stopped on Interstate 465 in Indianapolis in December to help a wandering 3-year-old boy wearing only a diaper and T-shirt. Police tracked down his mother, Nancy Dyer, in her filthy apartment, where her 2-year-old daughter was eating spaghetti off the floor. Dyer's first reaction to news about her son: "Oh, he got out again."

[North end of Key Deer Blvd construction] The Refuge headquarters, offices, and storage building were pretty much destroyed during Wilma.  The stuff headed out there is part of the rebuilding project.  No wetlands are being filled.  The buildings are just being built on fill, above flood level as required by law.

I agree with the posting yesterday of the new Lencho’s Authentic Mexican & Seafood Restaurant.  The beef in my burrito was tough, tasteless and grisly.  I won't go back either.  There is a fabulous Mexican restaurant on Duval St--very authentic!  And to the writer re:  BBQ family, home cooking.  That's Johns specialty at The Big Pine Coffee Shop.  Just no music or salad bar.  But very tasty food.

Number one pick up line for Big Pine barflies and Moose Lodge patrons: “Hey Nice Tooth!”

Maytag recalls 2.3 million dishwashers, and on the same note the INS (Immigration and Naturalization Service) is trying to recall 5 million illegal dishwashers.

It would appear that the property tax appraisers didn’t use any environmental criteria when making their value appraisals on vacant land here.  Monroe County being the most environmentally challenged counties in the state should be required to incorporate in their appraisals all impending environmental issues relating to real property.  These county property appraisers failed to incorporate into their property assessments an impending Tier system, a current FEMA list, or any moratoriums placed on vacant property in 2005 or 2006.  They valued your land as if you could go down to the building dept and pick up a building permit today.  When I went to a value adjustment board to dispute this high property value Mr. Higgs (who didn’t even return my phone call) has placed on my property the words from the mouths of the rip off artists on this board were “Sorry Sir we have no crystal ball here” We know nothing about any Tier System, FEMA list or moratoriums when we did our appraisals, we even heard the Tier system did even pass`”.

According to The Florida Real Property Appraisal Guidelines document, I pulled off the Florida Department of Revenue Property Tax Administration Program’s web pages it states under Section 2.4 "There are four forces that influence real property values.  They are: legal/regulatory, physical/environmental, economic, and social forces.  Also subsection 2.4.1 states, these forces include items such as zoning codes, future land use classifications, and building codes. The hearing officer at the value adjustment board hearing, which was not even from this county, stated “we don’t have to use that guide.  Sorry sir we understand your frustration and my heart bleeds for you. We will see you next year.” Next!

This was the biggest kangaroo court type set up I have even seen; and believe me, living in Monroe County, I have seen my share of kangaroo courts.  You are faced by 10 bureaucrats and 2 county attorneys all of them there to back up their crime of ripping you off….. I’m sick of this and ashamed of you gutless citizens in this county that let these criminals run over you like this.  It’s about time you stand up to these crooks and exercise your right and protest you high property evaluations, these people are going to put you in the poor house if you let them.
--Govwatch05@netscape.com

Kudos to the gentleman in the gray pickup who stopped this morning on Key Deer Blvd and helped a turtle safely along its journey to the other side of the road.

Come join the Moondogs for fun and dancing at special Thursday night engagement at the Looe Key Tiki Hut. Dogs are welcome to bring their owners along. See you there!

Don’t look now, but Iraq is getting the largest welfare check in the world’s history. And the republicans are happy to give it to them. They love them Iraqis. What happened to telling the Iraqis "Put your nose to the grindstone and save your own money?" Why are Americans footing their "liberation"?

Mexican tourism with a twist! Click here: ACN :: Mexican Tourism Ad

Wrong human relations equals body karma.

[average room rate in Key West is $242 a night] Lordy, that is cheap!  Think of some of those scuzzy motels that were added in to lower the average figure.  Our county is rural, but at the five star inn to arrive for tea, go to an incredible room, have dinner, spend the night and be out by 2:00 the next day starts at around $1,600.  The funny part is that it is such a great experience with such accoutrements that it is worth every penny!

[New Spyware] Be careful some asshole may be watching you! 

I heard that the Publix project at the True Value and KDs is still a go.  I vote for Outback too!

We had the same experience at Lencho’s Mexican as was described by the other reader. Stale, cold chips and lousy salsa, but we had sense to leave before ordering more than a beer!

The alligator can still fall victim to implemented team work strategy, made possible by the tight knit social structure and survival-of-the-fittest-pack-mentality bred into canines over thousands of years by natural selection. See the remarkable photograph attached, courtesy of Nature Magazine. Note that the Alpha dog has a muzzle hold on the gator preventing it from breathing, while the remainder of the pack prevents the beast from rolling.    

$242 per night for a room? Why don't you just go to Little Palm Island for $1200 a night?

We had an excellent dinner at Parrotdise for Valentines, but I have one little problem. As soon as we sat down we were informed, "no more Pinot Gricio " We said, “OK. We will have Cabernet.” It seems the house Cabernet is Big Pecker and if you don't like that the next one is $9 a glass. Hah, imagine that! It's like, o.k. let me twist your arm and make you drink Big Pecker. Well, we had her pour it out and upgraded to Avalon at $9 a glass. There are just some things you won't substitute!

[Playing music so loud it rattles your windows] Can someone please give me a lobotomy? We got this guy pissing and moaning about the music again. What did you do to your neighbor for him or her to do this to you? If they consistently play loud music past midnight that is one thing, but if they do it on holidays it is another thing. This sounds to me like you pissed off your neighbor and he is getting back at you for something. How do your other neighbors feel about you? If you have not done anything to your neighbor and he does not listen to reasonable requests then you have reason to be upset. But if you pissed off your neighbor, then you deserve what you get. Now quit your crying.

[average room rate in Key West is $242 a night] It's been that way for quite a while. What makes you think it will change?

It sure is nice to see neighbors out walking their dogs;  even if some of them don't return your greetings and pick up their dog as if yours were going to attack.  Walking is good for all of us, mentally and physically.  Perhaps it will improve dispositions.  Sorry to see some folks so unhappy and in pain.  Keep on walking and maybe even try smiling once in awhile.

I want to second the motion that a Family Style BBQ place would make a great addition to the area.  The salad bar would be great too. A nice place where you wouldn't mind bringing children, Mom and Dad or Grandma.  Just great food with a family setting, big portions and reasonable prices.  Whoever wrote that suggestion has a great idea.

[Construction at north end of Key Deer Blvd] The federal government (Key Deer Refuge is part of the Fish and Wildlife) does not need to get any permits for anything. The Federal Government can do whatever they want with their property. They didn't need to get permits or have the work inspected when they got the original Coconut Farm property. They don't need anybody's permission to do anything they want of federal property.

Where is Bum Farto?

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Thursday February 15, 2007

Valentine Day 2007

[Restaurant review] I tried the new Mexican restaurant in Marathon a few days ago.  (The name now escapes me)  The interior has been redecorated into a very pleasant Mexican theme and is bright and clean.  I was greeted and seated promptly and my server took my iced tea order and had it to my table in just a minute.  Unfortunately that’s where the good experience ended. 

The chips and salsa were disappointing.  The so called “salsa” was nothing but watery diced tomatoes and chopped onion.  No spices, seasonings or anything to add flavor or zip.  The cold chips came straight from a bag and after I ate the first few from the top of the basket I notice that a few of the chips in the basket had dried tomato juice and dried onion on them.  I wondered if that basket had been recycled from a previous table with a few more chips thrown on top. 

The menu offers no combinations, usually common on a Mexican menu.  I almost went for the Chimichanga until I noticed the description said “stuffed with red and green peppers.”  I asked the server if that meant chili peppers or bell peppers.  She answered, “bell peppers.”  Could they possibly be asking the fajitas to do double duty as the chimi filler as well?  I asked if I could get a chicken enchilada and a beef taco.  I was told that both the enchiladas and tacos come three to an order and could not be combined.  I opted for beef tacos.  Crisp shells are not offered.  The menu said that the soft tortillas were “home made.”  They may have been made in someone’s home, but I doubt they were made on premises.  When my lunch arrived on a cold plate I noted that the tacos were also cool.  In each small rolled tortilla was a skimpy portion of meat chunks with little if any flavor.  I am sure that you could have put the entire meat portion of one of the tacos in a shot glass and had room left over.  Rather than piping hot, both the yellow rice and the black beans were nearly cool at best.  Actually the beans and rice were much more like Cuban black beans and rice that anything I have ever had in a Mexican restaurant.  When I paid my bill I was asked, “How was everything?”  I answered, “I was actually rather disappointed.”  This got no response other than to hand me my change.  The total?  $13.79 incl. tip. 

Perhaps some people who are not familiar with authentic Mexican food would consider the food acceptable, but as someone who really likes good Mexican food I was very disappointed and will not likely return.  Of course, you should try them for yourself and form your own opinion. --chartrac@bellsouth.net

I’m a Democrat and well off too.

[Highly educated doctors and Chelsea Clinton] Now the hatemongers are attacking Chelsea because they hate her parents. Sick-os.

[Affordable housing permits requested] Now I just wonder if the Bubba system is still alive and well? Hard to believe that Comm Neugent would step into that one as the party wrote. I wonder what pipeline he is working inside of since others must follow the proper procedures about permitting. But, just maybe,  George has a little pull in the planning / building departments. One will just have to wait and see. It’ll be easy to find out because all the county's e mails do become public record.

[County TV link] There is no longer any need to take time off work to see the County commission meetings because they are all available on http://ecweb4.ecstreams.com/public/dynamic/?client=MonroeCoFL Just pick a date from the calendar on the left and then pick the part of the meeting you’d like to watch. This is possible because of the new IT crew at the county who’ve also place WI-FI hot spots at all the libraries.

We've always had stupid people, it's just that when I was young we didn't let them outside.

Can someone tell me what has Habitat for Humanity done (besides competing against hardware, furniture and Salvation Army stores with free donated stock) for the homeless since Halcyon Park was finished over 5 years ago when houses were 150k?

Happy Valentine to my beautiful wife Lee Ann.

When someone in your neighborhood is playing music so loud it rattles your windows, or they are partying well past midnight, or their dog is constantly shitting in your yard, or any other annoyance for that matter, what are you supposed to do?  Sure, you can talk to them like a good neighbor, but what do you do when that doesn't work and they ignore your request over and over?  Are you supposed to just live with it?  Hell no!  Of course there are other alternatives, but I do not want to end up in jail with felony charges.  Your only option is to call the cops, or whoever else has the authority to put an end to it.  Let's face it; I've never seen anyone arrested on noise complaints before.  The cops show up and tell you to turn the music down.  That's it.  Call me a cop-caller all you want.  But, I'm not going to feel like a prisoner in my own home because of some asshole neighbor who has no respect for the rest of the neighborhood.  

If you’re in the mood for a dog and pony show, this is for you. Skidboot

What in the world is happening at the north end of Watson in the Key Deer headquarters?  There is a huge crane and dump trucks hauling marl and all sorts of goings on.  How the heck did Army Corps of Engineers give a permit for all that?  If someone knows please let us in on it.

[Reduction of the welfare state] If the stories about the Mexicans on welfare are true (the only ones I know work like the devil is after 'em and work 7 days a week if they can get it) you only have the left leaning voters of years past to thank. They started the welfare spiral in the first place.  They have been promoting paying people to sit on their duffs for years and they created this whole mess with the first give-a-way program.  Years ago, I just about gave up when good workers came into my office and said they had to quit because they would be earning too much money to receive this or that check.  I pointed out to them that they would make more if they continued working and the answer always was, "Why work when they pay me to sit at home?"

The generations of people of all colors and creeds that have been held back because of these welfare programs owe their demise to those who thought they were helping. There will always be people who need welfare, but we need to ratchet the government programs back and go back to the policies of the past where the need was filled by the local church or a private party.  The need was taken care of and we do not need the antiquated public assistance programs of President Johnson's "Great Society." Reduction of the welfare state is second only to protecting our country from the radical Muslims.

[About the found photos] Contact Tom Hambright, the historian at the Monroe County library in Key West, if he can't help find the owner he will definitely give the photos a safe place to stay and be preserved.

Never, never, never ever fart in a wet suit.

[Ungrateful retired Marine] Tricare is $222 a year and Humana is $800 a month with a $2500 deductible.  Quit your bitching.

[At last! People adding bleach to their own gene pool] Daring young men use the danger of moving cars for attention, especially if there's a video camera rolling. An 18-year-old Topeka, Kan., man became the latest "Jackass"-imitating casualty when he bailed out of a car going 35 mph in October and suffered a serious head injury. Other video performers go "ghost riding the whip" (letting their cars coast in neutral while they climb onto the roof to dance), with at least two deaths reported. In the newest craze, Jonathas Mendonca, 22, was hospitalized in critical condition in Fort Lauderdale, Fla., in January after "skiing" (holding onto the back of a car) on Interstate 95 at 65 mph.

I did try to keep quiet about the retired Marine's comments, but I served 30 years, retiring as a Sergeant Major. So, my monthly check is way higher than his, but that is not the point. One of my retirement perks is that I can choose to take anyone I want shopping in a PX or Commissary. I am grateful for that, in fact I'm heading to KWNAS Commissary tomorrow with a friend, and I'm sure I will again--often. To get on base someone must have a valid military ID, so it's not an issue of the general public having access.

Thou shalt not use the Three Stooges' name in vain (its a man thang).

Now if this doesn’t suck the most about illegal immigration I don’t know what does! Bank of America (of all places) in California is trying a pilot project at 22 locations to offer home loans to people without social security numbers in order to profit from an untapped pool of borrowers. Those borrowers without documentation are illegal immigrants and some are likely terrorists, what are they thinking?

[Bubba System book on Key West]  Go to www.bookhq.com and enter the title.  Expect to pay big bucks.

[More bleach in the gene pool] Now I'm really disappointed in you readers of the Coconut Telegraph! Chaka Chandler was featured on the Keys Dating Site also known as Keysso.net as a "fugitive from justice" from up north and was returned via our tax dollars. Now you would think anybody running from the law would be smart enough not to do appear on TV. That's what radio is for!

I certainly call myself conservative, but FAIR is way too right wing whacko for my thinking. Before any of us fall for the great sounding rhetoric from the far left or the far right do some research and follow the money. 

FAIR is one of a million lobby groups of lawyers out there (not saying they are good or bad) and if you like what they say and agree what you have to do is donate money to them to keep them in business so they can lobby (bribe) to get votes that pass laws tuned to your way of thinking. In a few seconds with a Google search the following was found and one has to discern whether to believe this site.  It’s all a crapshoot and we have to be able to sieve the crap from the buckshot.  The following is just a little of the info out there:
 

"FAIR boasts that it has testified before Congress more than any other American organization. Tanton founded FAIR in 1979. FAIR’s links to other local and national organizations that are stridently anti-immigrant, anti-Latino, and supremacist have undermined FAIR’s own credibility and led to questions about the underlying agenda of its restrictionist approach to immigration. In 2002 FAIR’s income of $3.6 million came from the following sources: unrestricted grants ($1,877,079), contributions ($1,142,753), investment income ($482,737), other income ($25,856), and net assets released from restrictions ($142,142). Expenditures the same year amounted to $4 million for public education ($598,273), membership education and services ($515,347), field ($296,545), research and publications ($468,273), media ($363,260), government relations ($438,827), lobbying ($265,942), litigation ($125,740), management and general supporting services ($482,449), and fundraising ($452,696)."

[I'd be forced to listen to Air America] Not any more; and you can choose to switch the channel any time you want. Air America went bankrupt and I know you cannot find this out because your news won't tell you the whole story.  That's ok. Just live in your dream world of CBS, ABC, NBC, PBS and NPR where are Soros and gang are going to spew their venom next?  They are currently trying to prime you to get excited about Obama to rule this nation and be a force in the world. As soon as you find out his true history, you will fall back and be relieved to vote for Hillary, the shining Joan of Arc.  You are being played.  I just wish you would give the other music a tryout.

Politically incorrect Prime Minister of Italy short video.

I am not the father of Anna Nicole's baby.

A nice addition to Big Pine Key would be a BBQ restaurant, with good old  family style dining. That would include a salad bar.  I'm talking about a place where you could also get meatloaf,  liver and onions, and fresh apple pie. A place where the kids are welcome during mealtimes.  Wednesday nights, acoustic  music,  Friday night, blues.  Saturday night some kick ass rock & roll. And a Sunday morning buffet that would make your mouth water. Oh, well, back to reality.

Thanks for not disagreeing with me when I said Republicans are every bit as greedy when it comes to redistributing my hard earned tax money to others American or Iraqi. We can finally agree.

I read that he average room rate in Key West is $242 a night. That can’t go on for much longer. Spending that much money for a room (that you only use to sleep in) is bad for the City’s reputation.

The one good thing about moaning-Sloan’s ramblings is that they are signed and I can just skip over them.

Screw the PC crap. Call the troop "surge" what it is: war escalation!

[Chaka Chandler] I think he's working the other side of the camera these days.  Browse his name in the arrest record and you’ll see he’s on the other side of the bars. Arrest Record

(?)You mean downwind.

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Wednesday February 14, 2007

Tuesday February 13, 2007

[NPR and PBS] I know it's hard to recall how real news works, particularly in this day of 24 hour news channels and talking heads, but NPR and PBS is it.  There was very little coverage of Anna Nicole Smith on NPR last week, gratefully, as well as mercifully few details on the NASA / diaper astronaut. Instead, they concentrated largely on news stories (about real news) that last long enough to get multiple sides of a story, without having pundits yell at each other, as if that was some sort of balance.

Accurate and  in-depth reporting is important to the health of our nation. Important enough that good journalism was recognized by early patriots as the Fourth Estate and protected to allow it to shine some light on the behavior of the three branches of our government. As such, the pittance in government funding spent provides great returns.
 
If good journalism is crucial to the proper functioning of our nation, then poor reporting works to make it more dysfunctional. The simple measure of "Can it turn a profit" is not a good yardstick to determine journalistic value, as wonderfully demonstrated by Fox News. Sure, they make money, but the value of a year of "Fair and Balanced" coverage isn't worth a day's funding for NPR.

Did I mention studies have shown NPR listeners to be consistently better informed then Fox viewers, sometimes by a factor of 2 or 3?

Alert! Alert!
Valentine's Day is tomorrow. Buy your card and chocolates today. Don't get caught short and get yelled at. Take precautions and keep the peace; it's worth the effort.

[Retired Marine who dissed the Military because they don’t check IDs at the Commissary in KW] Sir, you sound like one ungrateful sick puppy. If someone gave me $2400 a month for saluting a couple of times a day and free medical care I sure wouldn’t complain about petty stuff like you do. I think you drink.

On 02/12/07 I contacted George Neugent, Monroe County Commissioner about getting 7 affordable housing permits for the upper Keys to put houses on 7 lots I own. It’s a great spot for all the teachers, cops and firefighters they've been bitching about not having housing for. Let's see if they're talking out of both sides of their mouths.  Neugent said to email the RE’s (land description) to him and he would forward them to the person that could expedite this matter. I sent the REs by Email yesterday.  I also called State Representative Ron Saunder’s office and left a message on his answer machine for him to call me back.  I wanted to get him involved to maybe add some impetus to this journey. I'll make a bet on Day 1 this will take over 2 years to do--if it gets done.

4:58 pm Monday. I got a Email from Comm. Neugent.  He says it's in the Pipeline. We'll see if and where the pipeline gets plugged. I will post updates on the progress of this journey.

I’d like to see a Mexican restaurant here.

[Chaka Chandler] I think he's working the other side of the camera these days. How about LaLaBelle and Goddess? They were on Friday nights for a while, but it's been all repeats lately.

Forget religion. There are no answers—only choices.

Because of yesterday’s rain it seemed as though every tourist in the Keys was at the W/D. Is there something in their upbringing that makes snowbirds block all the aisles with their carts?

Highly educated doctors and Chelsea Clinton!

A new bar and grill on Big Pine should be a cheekee hut type and specialize in one kind of food (10 varieties of pizza, burgers, wings, fish sandwiches, etc.) P.S there’s one (Cheekee hut) behind the old Baltimore Oyster House.

Saint Valentine is the patron saint of Hallmark cards. He was an Italian from the Chicago area and was captured by the Moors in the Second Crusades. While locked in prison for way too long, he struggled with gender and started carving little hearts from biscuits and shoe polish. He sent these little tributes of affection to his roommates in February of each year. The idea caught on. He also ridded Ireland of snakes.

I found this beautiful winter poem and thought it might be a comfort to you during this cold snap we're experiencing.  It's very well written. "Winter" a poem by Abigail Elizabeth McIntyre: SHIT! It's Cold!

I went to two different stores to buy chalk for my blackboard only to find out that they haven’t made blackboards in years. They now use those white shiny boards and write on them with magic markers.

Redneck rear view mirror--third world style.

[new restaurant/bar] Hooter’s

The jackass is the guy whining about  a $2400 a month government check.  I wish that I made $2400 a month working two full time Jobs.

How do you know if your left or right footed? The best I can figure is you have to notice which foot the toes are on that you use to tap to the beat of the music. I’m left toed.

Puff away in your own house or yard. I don't care. It hurts no-one. The problem I have is you must get your wacky from somewhere. That somewhere seems to be my neighborhood. Go somewhere else to do your dealing that won't cause me any grief. Boom-boxes at all hours, shiny obnoxious exhaust pipes, traffic using my driveway to turn around, being flipped off when I complain about the above irritants. These are but a few of the reasons someone would be inclined to turn you in. Try asking your drug infested little sh-t pusher to be a better neighbor. You might be surprised at the result.

I'm addicted to placebos. I would give them up, but I know it wouldn't do any good.

Those Dixie Chicks are some lookers. Too bad the songs stink!

The laws for illegal immigration require change and the only way they will be changed is through the voice of the people who are not related to or friends of illegal immigrants.  Please click on this website to read about this injustice to the American taxpayer.  Thanks to the person who first posted it.  $11 Billion to $22 billion is spent on welfare to illegal aliens each year. You worry about National Public Radio and the Public Broadcasting System when this is allowed?  Where are your priorities? http://tinyurl.com/zob77

I have to admit it Anna Nicole’s baby is our love child; I was having an affair with her last year.

Out looking for a one-nighter Saturday, I strolled up to a little honey at one of our local watering holes and asked, “So, how do you like your eggs in the morning?”  She looked at me with deep blue eyes and said, “Unfertilized, thank you,” and got up and left.  Curses, foiled again!

[new restaurant] How about a home cooking place open for lunch and dinner. They could have three fresh home cooked entrees a day with a whole slew of fresh veggies to choose from; then have a regular menu with sandwiches and soups, salads etc. Oh, and don't forget the cornbread and banana pudding!

I got a 95% on yesterday’s driving test. I'm 56.  The last time I took a driving test I was 18. Whoo-hoo!  

How quickly people forget.  FEMA paid something like $250 million dollars for 2 cruise ships to dock in New Orleans for 6 months after Katrina for storm victims to live on after the disaster.  Not very many took the opportunity – maybe because they were sick of being near water, which is understandable.  The ships wound up being used by recovery workers for housing.

The busted pot smoker was not inside his own home.  He said he was outside in the yard in essence daring his busy body neighbors to make him a perfect target.  Knowing there are bunches of up tight transients around this time of year makes discretion the better part of valor.

Ha!  The Dixie Chicks winning the Grammy is like Al Gore getting the Nobel prize if his wife can buy it for him.  More leftist crap.  I think all of them should take the U.N. and go to Paris.

I can’t believe that ungrateful retired Marine who receives $2400 a month, free health care and many other benefits from the government is complaining because the Commissary isn’t cheap enough. The other “civilians” in the store are retired military. The Keys are filled with us. You ungrateful bastard!

I'm a Republican and very well off, thank you.

[If a new restaurant/bar came to town] I would like to see good clean food, clean interiors with lots of sun light, decent sized drinks at sane prices, good parking, rest rooms that are not condemned, service personnel who care, mellow music, shirts and shoes required, and an owner who parties with us. Never happen I know!

[National Debt] I can't believe it. I was just going to scan AP news of the moment and guess what the top story was?  Waaahooo, the grandkids are saved!
The deficit for the first four months of the current budget year is down sharply from the same period a year ago as the government continues to benefit from record levels of tax collections. The Treasury Department reported Monday that the deficit for the budget year that began Oct. 1 totals $42.2 billion, down 57.2 percent from the same period a year ago.

[Restaurant] How about Outback?

I'm not a real country music fan, but I say yes to the Dixie Chicks and their retaliation.  You have to love the spirit to speak free.  Natalie said she's humble so shut up and sing!

[From "I sin everyday."] Anger, jealousy, envy, and judgment are sins.  If you don't think I struggle with them everyday between the drivers from up north and Winn Dixie, you’re wrong.  I do take responsibility for myself and others.  As far as a real life is concerned:  if working 8-9 hours a days is considered real, I’ll be glad when it’s over.  As for why you’re so angry--I don't know, but I will pray for you and hope you can have a change of heart. It may take a while, but I hope to hear from you again.

[Tattle Tales]  What’s up with these people ratting out their neighbors? Do we live in America or the Soviet Union? All these tattle tales living in the Keys. It’s kind of sad that these people have nothing better to do. Get a boat!

[record national debt will be repaid by your grandkids and mine] So what? We have been paying national debts big and small.  The fact is that my grand kids all own their own businesses and are all doing well so they will be able to afford their part of any debt left to pay.  The way the tax code is written their part is going to be a huge percentage, they will have to work hard like their old grandfolks.  If the left would just butt out and quit being drooling-envious of what others have made and saved, and enjoy the booming activity of our ever expanding economy, that same expansion will pay off the debt.

Do you guys ever have any fun, can you not just sit down for an instant and take a deep breath and enjoy what you have now and have done in the past.  Smile!

Don't worry about the world coming to an end today. It's already tomorrow in Australia

11 billion to 22 billon for illegal aliens? That's crazy, but it's true. I read the whole posting. An American citizen is only eligible for 50% of the welfare that an illegal gets. If that is not the most insane thing that I’ve heard I don't know what is! Who makes up these rulings? The Three Stooges? If I was to return to the US illegally I would be thrown straight into prison. I am not a fugitive. I would only commit the same crime as thousands of Mexicans and other wetbacks entering the country illegally.  Then how come I have to go to prison and they can collect welfare? If I wasn't looking at 5 years at Atlanta or Oakdale I might give it a try. Now, Deer hearts, that’s called deterrent. If illegals were not handled with such kid gloves but severely punished, they would stop coming. They make a fool out of the immigration laws.

Julio from Cucaracha gets north of the Rio Grande with his pregnant wife and she has the child. To them that’s like wining the lottery--medical care, food stamps, cash, ect. Stop it!  It should not be that way. Julio should go to prison (minimum 2 years). It’d still be cheaper than keeping his wife and child on welfare for who knows how long. The wife and child should be sent back to Cucaracha as soon as possible. The immigration lawyer who wants to represent them should be kicked in the ass. Two years on, when Julio is deported back to Cucaracha and tells his compadres how he got beat up and butt f**ked regularly by a 250 pound black Muslim, Pedro, Agusto and Chico would cancel their plans to go north. That's deterrent!

[Old photo web site] I hope someone claims the photos.  They seem to start in the early 1900 and on up. What a treasure to have lost.

Why can't I find the Bubba System book anywhere and where did the couple who wrote it go?  The reason I'm asking is because I am working on Volume Two which will not be put in a corner this time.  My friend, the Government Worker, uses "Tag Talk" which lets them trace a license plate of whomever their heart desires and takes bullying to a whole new level. 

Did you miss the one where Air America Radio, yet another Soros-type business tried to feed the masses crap and went bankrupt? I guess the federal government should have bailed them out like NPR and PBS.

Everybody that was at the County commission meeting worked and took time off. I, for one, don't get paid for the time I took off to be at the meeting. My husband took off without pay as did many other people there. Once again I say, “don't believe everything you hear on the radio or read in the newspapers.” It would benefit everybody here if they looked into public records and informed themselves about what really goes on in the world. Hearsay can deeply damage a person.

[PBS is leftist crap]  Like it or not PBS is a network that isn’t sold to the largest companies in the country. If we will not bill the Iraqis for their liberation and American taxpayers can foot Iraq’s bill I think we can send some money to help a network that has some (although boring) educational programming here in the United States.

Kudos to Habitat for Humanity and their volunteers for a wonderful event Sunday at Coconuts. Terry Cassidy is to be commended for all his hard work--two weeks in a row!   Thankfully, some musicians did show up to help Terry out, but when the Doerfel Family showed up to lend a hand, the stage was theirs until the end.  The kids playing all those instruments had the crowd on their feet and applauding for the rest of the day.  What a wonderful donation for a worthy cause.  The Coconuts gang came through again and were also very much appreciated.   It is always so nice to see the community turn out (and a second time, at that ) to support this great event.  Way to go Big Pine!

[grumbling jarhead] First of all, thanks for your service.  As retired Navy, thanks for letting me give you a bus ride to the beach.  Your military retirement is pretty damn good.  Name one other institution that pays a monthly pension check like that each month after only 20 years of service!
Heck, that's a house payment here.  Did you expect to sit on your butt when you retired?  My Tricare medical payment is $222/year.  Yeah, it ain't free medical, but there are people here paying more than that each month! 

You're right, a lot of civilians have decals to get on base. We have more civilians working at the air station than military.  That's the way the military changed after you left. 

The commissary?  After Hurricane Wilma, the commanding officer gave civilian workers on base commissary and exchange privileges for 180 days to help their recovery. That order has been rescinded.  Only those who rate commissary/exchange privileges go there.  And as for their prices, compare them with prices in local grocery stores, not other commissaries.  You're right, prices are higher because you live in the Keys!   You can't compare prices with another commissary/exchange. Remember commissaries operate on a not for profit basis so the prices you get are the best for this area.  Don't believe me?  Try shopping for meat and dog food at a local grocer.  It's a lot more expensive.  You don't know how good your retirement is.  Semper Fi!

[Affordable housing] I agree with the person who referenced the Outer Banks, but unfortunately The Keys are worse. I did a quick check on some employment classifieds and real estate web pages (sales and long term rentals). My non-expert eyes saw that wages being offered here are about the same as there for a variety of jobs, but real estate is about 20% cheaper on the Outer Banks than here. 

Commuting an hour, while a pain, is not that rare in many places in the US. Key Largo to Marathon or Key West to Marathon is about an hour. But I am starting to see the 2+hour commuters, which consists mostly of low-wage non-English speaking workers who keep our Keys wages artificially low.

The good news is that there will be a breaking point where people will again demand better (or any!) service instead of low prices. I would not mind paying a couple of bucks more at the grocery store or gas station if the level of customer service and English communication skills were like they were 10 years ago. Am I the only one who believes that if... Long Winded Tomes

Every American should enjoy low prices at a government commissary.  They are, after all, subsidized by tax money.  So quit your whining!

NPR is not about profit; therefore its advertisers can not influence what is said.

[if a new restaurant/bar came to town, what would you like to see] Sushi! Mexican! Vegetarian! Thai! Wine Bar with appetizers! Someplace with a

Self-serve salad bar like Wendy's used to have. There are supermarkets that have salad bars where you fix your own to-go box and pay by the ounce, its great. For the love of Buddha, would someone please buy the old KD's and at least open the Tiki out back? How much is that place going for anyway? BPK, is there anyone out there who likes to hang socially with a well-rounded, intellectual brain in there head? Sorry, the snowbirds are getting to me.

Affordable housing is the means to divide and conquer an area so you drive down the property values so you can buy up the squalor left by the un-maintained owners, then put in your politicos to change the laws so you can build mansions and yacht harbors to enjoy what the peasants enjoyed before you pushed them out.

No matter how you say it, renting one's crawl space is disgusting and should be considered a degradation to any neighborhood. Most of us live in million dollar plus homes and have the dignities, tastes and culture to go along with that bracket. Some haven't recognized this yet, and never will. Pick a isolated Key and build workers quarters on it. Up wind please!

“when our all knowing and all wise government decides” This is the key phrase to the downfall of the Lower Keys and in fact, all the Keys. We give people a job to do our maintenance for us, they grow halos, and become Gods dictating how, where, and why we should live. Your home is not your castle. It is a temporary tax yielding bucket until some one richer takes it from you!

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Tuesday February 13, 2007

Monday February 12, 2007

Someone supporting County Administrator Willi excused his screw up at the airport saying it has been going on for 14 years. That is incorrect. The contract has been signed during his employment, therefore he is responsible. That is his job--to administer.

[don’t currently have the right to smoke pot in your home] Neighbors should not snitch on neighbors. You don’t currently have the right to bum f**k in your own home, but I’m not going to report you.

[Sloan critic “I sin every day.”] What a bunch of crap. I’m not a Christian, but I lead a good life and although I do sin occasionally, it is rare. I don’t know who’s more delusional; the “critic” or Sloan! Get a real life and take responsibility for it yourself instead of some dreamy fantasy.

[Neighbor reporting pot smoker] Leave the guy alone to do what he wants in his own home; he's not hurting anyone. Live and let live, goddamit!

Affordable housing is apparently an ongoing debate because the definitions aren't spelled out.  What is considered affordable?  Who are we trying to house?  And affordable is all relative to the wages for the area.  As someone previously mentioned - you need housing for your teachers, firefighters, police officers, healthcare workers.  Is there affordable housing for your average working Joe? 

On the Outer Banks of NC, the workers commute an hour to come clean beach houses and cater to tourist needs.  They can't afford to live near the beach.  The locals are being run off by rising property taxes.  People that have had the same home in the family for generations can no longer pay the taxes on fixed incomes.

So will living in paradise only be for the rich?  Good, working-class people should be able to afford a home.

I am shouting this from the very core...NPR and PBS should not be getting public (taxpayers) money for their far left liberal rants.  Heck, I would not even want Fox News to get government money. Oops, how come they don't need it? Because a huge majority of people are actually listening to Fox and showing how capitalism works. They are making tons of money off advertising. I guess most viable corporations don't want to advertise to the three people listening to NRP and PBS.

[Affordable Housing--cruise ships or barges] Guess what, you bought the property not the view! So when our all knowing and all wise government decides to use that view for something stupid, you're pretty much SOL (Shit out-of Luck)

The collection contains 616 photos. These photos were either lost, forgotten, or thrown away. The images now are nameless, without connection to the people they show, or the photographer who took them. Look at Me, a collection of found photos

We should do all we can to eliminate public monies from going to PBS and NPR.  If they can’t make a fair profit it is because their programming sucks and they can’t get sponsors.  I am tired of funding that leftist crap with my tax dollars.

We went to Knuckleheads for dinner on Saturday night and as usual both the service and food were great!  I’m not sure why there doesn’t seem to be many people there when we go as it is a really unique location. You can tell that the owners put a great deal of thought into the restaurant with many personal touches. We’ll be back yet again so hopefully it is there to stay.

[Affordable Housing] Come on Cruise Ships.

[To legal enclosures] It seems that you must own a home here in the Keys. You probably rent it out when you are up north. I remember when I was younger coming to the Keys to rape the lobster during mini-season. Renting a place and trashing it and giving a shit less. Now that we live here I would still rent my downstairs to someone that wants to live and work here responsibly.

Everyone please learn CPR in case you need to save me someday! Here’s a quick video to teach you in three steps. 1. Call 911. 2. Clear the airways and breath twice in the person’s mouth until the chest rises. 3. Press the chest between the nipples 30 times. Thank you. LEARN CPR - CPR information and training resources.

Just out of curiosity, if a new restaurant/bar came to town, what would you like to see?

I recently discovered the Florida Sportsman magazine web site, called the FS Forum. Two Keys links, an off topic link, and a general fishing link are the most interesting. Try it!  Click here: OutdoorsBest Forums: Main

I wonder if the Winn Dixie management is still reading this site. If so, could you pretty please paint some pedestrian walkways?  For some reason cars just whiz through there without slowing or stopping to give pedestrians right-of-way. I had to stand in the rain for several minutes waiting for an opportunity to crossover today! 

On a positive note, usually when I shop late in the day on Sundays I find I have come too late for my basics (milk, creamer and bread) but today the store was still well stocked. Hooray!

The jackass of the year award should go to the person who said that the military has great retirement benefits. Yea, right! I spent 30 years in the Marine Corps and they pay me $2400 a month.  The commissary in Key West is a joke.  It is 40% higher than any commissary I have ever seen.  In addition, every civilian in Key West has a base sticker.  Sluzzy civilians go into the commissary with a military person that they lickered up so they can get the so called cheap prices.  When I joined the Marine Corps in 1961 they told me I had free medical care for the rest of my life. Guess what, nothing is free anymore.  It just pisses me off that in the Sigsbee commissary there are more civilians then military and they let them get away with it. They should check ids when you enter, but no they check them at the register while the friend who went to Canada during the Vietnam era stands behind them and gets our benefits for nothing.            

N.Y. lake effect snow hits 9.5 feet deep!

I like 'em F.I.R.M and I love Donna too!

[create a legal enclosure] I think it is a good idea to house transit-trash-low-renters in million dollar homes on million dollar properties, but I am a bit biased as I am a transit-trash-low-renter.

I was not at the workshop about Mr. Willi, but it does not surprise me the majority of people were behind him .The working people of Monroe county are working so that should tell you where his support comes from.

Does anyone really care that Anna Nicole Smith dropped dead?  The no-talent, drug soaked slut is getting more press than the Kennedy assassination.  It must be a really slow news week.

$11 Billion to $22 billion is spent on welfare to illegal aliens each year. http://tinyurl.com/zob77

I want to applaud the posting that quoted Teddy Roosevelt from 1907 on immigrants. I too am sick and tired of the Mexican-Americans, they should be in Mexico. The African-Americans should be in Africa and so on. If you want to be a hyphenated-American get the F##K out of the USA. I find it criminal to give a drivers license to someone who does not speak English.

I’m wondering if I could pay off my house by taking a collection up for my services.  I will ride the “angry girl” in attempt to make her happy and charge the community a fee for doing so.  She would be happy, stop bitching, wouldn't have to frequent the watering holes and I will own my house out right.  I will accept various forms of payment.  Guys, your payment must be cash.  Ladies, we could work out some sort of other payment.  Any thoughts from the fellow Big Pine Readers?  Would I still be considered a prostitute when it is for the good of the community and it isn't the bitch receiving my services who would be paying?  Is there a lawyer among us who can answer the legal questions on that?

[Affordable Housing--cruise ships or barges] I don’t know about either of those two options, but I applaud anyone who comes up with new ideas to solve the problem we have here. I know they brought in cruise ships for some event on the west coast some years ago to use as temporary housing.

Whenever someone has a different idea there are ten unimaginative people who immediately say why it can’t be done. I’m glad the Wright brothers didn’t listen to them.

The Miami Boat Show is like going to a third world country.  I’m happy that it's over a hundred miles away. 

The Republican Party is responsible for wealth redistribution as much as the far left is. The record national debt will be repaid by your grandkids and mine. That’s wealth redistribution on people who are not even in the work force. This is yet another reason America has booted out the Republican Party. The term "as thick as thieves" suits the republican to a T.

Where ya been?

I’m looking for a puppy that will be a small dog full grown (under 13 lbs).  I have a small dog 13 lbs wet.  He loves life and his family, but we think he would love a buddy.  We do have a cat that gets along with this three year old dog. I am interviewing only and would love to adopt. 240-1494 Classified Ads > Pets

The Clinton administration also gave the military raises during his administration. Do you really believe that only republicans give money to the military? Here’s a way to check. Look it up and see what party was in office during the peak years of military family’s receiving welfare. You will see the republicans were in office. They hate giving aid to Americans yet Iraq is getting the largest welfare check in the world’s history. Remember when the republicans told us that "Iraq will repay America with money from its oil reserves for its liberation"? Guess what? One Year later Bush decided to have the American taxpayer pay the entire cost. How nice. Maybe Iraqis should put their noses to the grindstone, work hard and pay their own damn bills.

You have to admit the far left wing of the Democratic party is at most 15% of the party’s voters, yet they can piss off 100% of the Republican party. It’s amazing how such a small number of a political wing can make so many look foolish trying to insult them. Someone needs to read Webster’s definition of Socialism.

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Monday February 12, 2007

Sunday February 11, 2007

Thank you F.I.R.M.  I received my refund back from Florida Peninsula today for $1,500!  Thank you again.

Terry Cassidy's Pickin' Party Too will be held Today. Sunday, Feb. 11th at Coconuts (at the light) on Big Pine Key from 12:00 to 5:00.   Habitat for Humanity is having a post Superbowl Party because they were not able to raffle off all the prizes and donations that this wonderful community gave them.  Terry is gathering all his musician friends for the day, starting with Mile Marker 24 at noon.  Babaloo's is catering the food and there will be a wood-burning Pizza oven and other donated goodies, plus lots of draft beer, wine and sodas.  Please, no coolers, but we will have tables and chairs and if it sprinkles, we will have tents and we can always go inside.

Tom Willi won because Sylvia Murphy and George Nugent had nothing to back their accusations. Tom was being blamed for situations that predate his employment by as much as 14 years (airport issues). The garbage about county employees being pressured into standing up for him got many county employees very upset. Those that don't like him are the very ones that are afraid of loosing their jobs due to Mr. Willi's desire to get rid of the dead weight in county government. For once, the people's desires came to fruition with his remaining in his position. The proof is the amount of people that showed up for the workshop set up to investigate the accusations. A huge percentage of the large amount of people there were there to support Tom Willi.

Hey Ed, that chick insulting people in a bar for being drunk in a place selling booze needs to relax, but she does have a point.  It does seem you give safe refuge to some businesses and not others.  Isn't an editor supposed to be as neutral as Switzerland?

Regarding military families on welfare and WIC, there aren’t that many.  The reason why military families qualify is like so many young families they start having kids before they can afford them.  The military has some of the best benefits around, but let's face it, if you're young and recently enlisted, you're not going to make as much until you work hard and advance.  The decision to have a family is not only emotional but financial.  Whether you're military or not, don't have kids until you can afford them!

Colombian hero Don Blas de Lezo lost his left leg at Gilbraltar and lost his right eye in the Battle of Tolon. In the battle of Barcelona he lost his right arm. In 1740, battling in Cartagena he was wounded in his right leg and what was left of him died.

[it takes 10 years to make a good wage] From what I can see, no one except the highly educated doctors and such step into high paying first jobs and that is why I keep saying, “Keep your nose to the grindstone, Save, and the American dream will be yours.” I did not say it happened overnight. 

And off the top of my head, one of the leading socialists Hillary just said something like "I would like to take the trillions that Exxon just made and.. blah, blah ,blah.”  As you said the government "Taking" anything is socialism; you made my point and if I wasn't enjoying friends, fishing and the general aura of the Keys I could look up many, many more examples emanating from the far left.  People help people each and every day and that does not mean giving them money (handouts)!  Opportunity offered is a far better reward in the good old USA.

[FEMA worker after Wilma] You think it may be a color related thing?

"In the first place, we should insist that if the immigrant who comes here in good faith becomes an American and assimilates himself to us, he shall be treated on an exact equality with everyone else, for it is an outrage to discriminate against any such man because of creed, or birthplace, or origin.  But this is predicated upon the person's becoming in every facet an American, and nothing but an American...There can be no divided allegiance here.  Any man who says he is an American, but something else also, isn't an American at all.  We have room for but one flag, the American flag...We have room for but one language here, and that is the English language...and we have room for but one sole loyalty and that is a loyalty to the American people."    --Theodore Roosevelt 1907

[Sonic boom earthquake] Florida Seismic Hazard Map and National Report-A-Quake maps Regional Information.

I would like to encourage the new owners of Key Deer Bar and Grill to announce the very recent and much awaited improvement that has taken place.  It has been a long needed change and will only improve the atmosphere, service and comfort of the customers.  I have also noted that the food service and quality is improving as new owners Greg and Clayton continue to make subtle changes.  Good luck and best wishes for your future success.

Always burn coconut husks when smoking something that smells funny--I've been told. P.S. is that Squirrel?

[I got mine} There is no way I will create a legal enclosure so I can make a few dollars profit and have to put up with the worry of transit trash robbing me, or wrecking my property. If people think it is a good idea to house low renters in million dollars homes on million dollar properties.

More on the 20 second rumble. A good example is dropping a stone in the canal. The initial splash is over  in an instant, but the ripple effect goes on a long time. The farther away from the source, the longer the wavelength. The longer the wavelength, the lower the note. Ever notice the high pitch sounds from a radio don't vibrate your insides, but the boom boxes do? 

It appears Ron Miller missed a chance to give Mayor DiGennaro a real knock out blow at the BOCC meeting Thursday.  Mario told the audience that this is the guy (Miller) that got arrested for being tied to the Jewfish creek Bridge. Miller should have said, “True, but it’s a lot fewer times than you’ve been arrested”

Too bad it's a long drive to Key Largo. The Historical Society's monthly lectures are great. This month Joe and Sally Bauer are giving an interesting diving program on Monday, February 12th at 7:00 p.m. in the Key Largo Library Community Room. This room is the door to the right of the library located in the Trade winds Shopping Center at MM 101.5, ocean side. Key Largo is nice on the water, but I sure wouldn't want to live up there in " Kendal  south " with all of the traffic and overpopulation. I'm pretty happy in BPK.

[Cuba shuttle service]  Don’t hold your breath.  Even if Castro died today the dictatorship/communist government will continue under his brother or some other high ranking official.  And until the Cuban government allows free, democratic elections and becomes “recognized” by the U.S. Government the island will remain closed to U.S. citizens.  As far as gambling is concerned, it illegal throughout Cuba. Castro shut down all the casinos and gaming halls when he took power.  At that time the gambling was operated by the U.S. mob underworld and funneled millions to corrupt Cuban officials to allow it to continue. Having traveled there a few years ago (legally) I will say it is a beautiful country and is a traveler’s and adventurer’s paradise.  Havana is old and is in decay, but there is still much to see and do and the people are wonderful and welcome Americans.  So yes, it would be a great vacation spot for American tourists, but don’t start packing just yet.  And the only fairy you’re likely to see is the one who leaves money under your pillow for your tooth!

What ever happened to Chaka Chandler, the black guy on the local news T.V. Channel 19?

I guess it shouldn't come as a surprise that Spehar, McCoy and Di Genarro sold us, the taxpayers, down the river once again despite overwhelming public support for the dismissal of Tom Willi.  As usual, only County Commissioners Neugent and Murphy had the guts to do the right thing for us poor taxpayers who will now take the financial beating for Willi's incompetence.  And who knows what future havoc, foolish expenditures and mismanagement crisis Willi will cause now that he is sure of his power base and is comfortable that he won't be held accountable for bankrupting the county.  The one good thing that may come out of this is that some of the Commissioners may have now guaranteed that they won’t get re-elected.

[Neighbor reporting pot smoker] While you should have the right to do that in your own yard, you don't currently have the right to.

[affordable housing] When did you come up with the ship or barge housing, when you were driving through the deep South? I thought that these days were long over, massa? Just keep the servants out of sight except when they’re needed.

Wouldn't it be great if the Doerfel Family Band moved to the Keys? They would definitely have a following wherever they played, like the Deadheads did with the Grateful Dead.

When I was serving in the military, we did not see any substantial pay raises until the Republicans took office.  Take a good look at what the military gets paid here in the Keys.  Aside from base pay, the housing allowance is somewhere around $2,000 a month depending on rank.  Food allowance is another $200.  Add hazard pay, dislocation, etc, the pay is much higher than most civilians.  Perhaps FOX had it right by demonizing the Democrats.  The numbers don't lie. 

This is John, the Pedal Steel Guitarist with Howard Livingston & Mile Marker 24 (when I'm in town).  My road band Harry Luge & Haywire will be performing at the Hog's Breath Saloon February 12-18.  It would be great to see some of my old friends and make new ones.  I will also be available to do some studio work (and fishing) while we are in town.

In response to all the positive e-mails I have received regarding the comments on this site recently regarding Key Deer. I want to thank you all for the support. It is the 100% positive feedback that lets me know that this business, like the many others I have run will be a huge success.

I just want to assure people that none of “that girl’s” comments upset me. I was just having fun. Call me cruel, but I can't stop throwing the invisible ball and watching the dog run crazy looking for it. I would like to let everyone know that I do welcome all feedback to the restaurant, and welcome you to e-mail me personally, whether positive or negative. I promise not to eviscerate you and make you look like a jackass.

We have been a huge success over the last month and have steadily seen business increasing, just as we knew we would. So thank you all for coming, and keep the input flowing. Thanks, Greg Wythe wydde24@aol.com 

Be careful what you eat if it's 'All You Can Eat'

[Sloan critic] I have just gone to Sloan’s Page to read some of his writings and I feel sorry for him.  He is so mixed up in his ramblings it scares me.   How he mixes up the teachings of Jesus and God is something that God warns us about.   Sloan, it really doesn't matter if Jesus was married.  God created marriage and it is good.  So if he did marry Mary M it does not really matter.  Jesus died for our sins. I believe that.   At 42 years of age I had 2 cars a house a motorcycle, a hot tub, boat and lots of money, sex and drugs, and I was so empty inside.  My life got really difficult after I threw out my son's father and tried to start my own business.  For as strong as I am, I got myself in such a bind financially, that I knew there was no way I could fix it my self.  I turned to God...Long Winded Tomes

When I get to Easy Street, do you think they'll have discount stores?

The Sweet Daddy Cool Breeze Band is looking forward to playing some blues at the Key Deer Bar & Grill on Friday Feb. 23. It's been cold up here in western Massachusetts. You don't know what a treat it is for us to be able to visit the Keys each year. Hope to see you there.

Studies show that 1 of 11 drivers cannot score more than 70% on the GMAC drivers test. See how you do at this link:
http://www.gmacinsurance.com/SafeDriving/2006/test.asp

George W. Bush is trying—yet again—to slash funding for NPR and PBS. Enough is enough. We've fought this fight before and won, but we can't afford the risk anymore. With the new Congress, we can make sure this never happens again. We need Congress to insulate NPR and PBS from the political winds. We can make it happen if enough of us sign this petition:
"Congress must save NPR and PBS once and for all. Congress should guarantee permanent funding and independence from partisan meddling." Clicking here will add your name to the petition: http://civ.moveon.org/publicbroadcasting/o.pl?id=9860-1374156-FUPX9CNEXWpijr9M0W1VXA&t=2

This morning, I received an email from a retired scientist containing a recent news article about the discovery of "the secret of life"  -- modern genetics -- really having come about as the result of the  discoverer’s use of LSD. The mind asylum escapee's email was captioned: "The TAO of LSD - Is it all we see or seem, but a dream within a dream?"

What exactly would Barack Obama be smoking outside the back door of the Oval Office? Perhaps it would help with our efforts to have relations with other countries?

On Saturday, Key West artist Captain Outrageous left this plane of existence to continue his work elsewhere- making things more beautiful than when he found them. We are lucky to have known –even briefly– a spirit so dynamic, that this world could only contain it for so long.
Have a wonderful journey, Captain.

The deadline for publishing is 6am

Sunday February 11, 2007

Saturday February 10, 2007

Guess what I did today?  I sat with a Sailor while his wife, my employee, gave birth to a perfect 8.1 pound baby boy by C-section. Welcome to the World Daylin Anthony DePappa. Congrats Erin, Derek, Devon, Honey, Papa and Aunt Donna. Girlfriend, you did good!  

Come join the Moondogs for fun, dancing, and great food at the Hogfish Bar and Grill on Stock Island tonight (Saturday) from 5:30 to 9:30. Also this Thursday we will be at the Looe Key Tiki Bar. See ya'll there!

A great big thanks to my snowbird neighbors for calling the cops because they "smelled someone smokin' somethin' funny in muh yard."  Lady, I work down here pleasing people like you so I can afford to live here.  As long as I am not being loud or a nuisance, could you just mind your own business?  Your little month vacation spot just happens to be my home.  I work very hard because I love living here.  If I want to relax on my property in my own way I should have the right to. 

New Orleans residents are bailing out. New Orleans is a city on a knife's edge. A year and a half after Hurricane Katrina, an alarming number of residents are leaving or seriously thinking of getting out for good. They have become fed up with the violence, the bureaucracy, the political finger-pointing, the sluggish rebuilding and the doubts about the safety of the levees. Maybe New Orleans is fixed. Maybe its not worth saving.  Just a thought.

Barack Obama is trying to quit smoking. His advisors tell him that Americans won’t elect a president who smokes. They’re probably right. How would it look to see the president stepping out of the oval office to sneak a smoke on the back porch with the other losers?

Any chance anyone has the number for the man who rents children's go carts?  He was at the last First State Bank Kids day up here.  Unfortunately he does not have an ad in the yellow pages and none of the other party rentals have anything more than a bounce tent or snow cone machine available.  Thank you in advance for any assistance.  

One of the Commissioners wives was wearing a shirt supporting Tom Willi at yesterday’s workshop to consider firing him. I guess this would be the same as Mrs. Bush wearing a Halliburton shirt at a Senate investigative hearing.

Did you know that Code Enforcers can trace license plates?  Whether you're a violator or not, they can mis-use the system and check out the people who come to your home.  Since the County is cleaning house, they should clean up that department as well.  A mandatory drug testing on a Monday morning of every single Government worker would be a good start. 

Tom Willi won and the people lost the fight for responsible government.

Abby ain't no quitter.

About those 20 second long sonic booms. Did you know that a clap of thunder lasts just a second or two, and yet they seem to go on for about 20 seconds? A strange coincidence methinks; or could this be some atmospheric phenomenon dreamed up by the government to get people not to notice when their supersonic planes go by.

Oh Lord, I don't know if I should get into this, but since someone asked if I was “the” Dee Dee I guess I better get out of trouble now.  I spell my nickname D-e-d-e and I am just an old farmer who is happily married (30 years this year, wahooO!)  Hubby and I have gone to Key Deer and find the breakfast and din-din great, but I’m married and we don't drink so bars are redundant; meaning exceeding what is necessary or normal (for us).  The only other note I can add to this ongoing odyssey is that we did not see anyone who looked to be toothless and the people outside looked as if they were having a good time and that was a great place for them to have fun.  Go there if you want to and don't if you don't!  Good luck to all the parties involved, but to my friends it ain't me, babe!

There will no doubt be a Cuba shuttle service and if they're smart they'll have gambling on the boat to get everybody warmed up for the gaming when they get there!  I only worry that our leaders might conspire to legalize gambling in Key West or worse throughout the Keys to compete for the gamers’ dollars. 

[DeeDee] The true difference is shown between a smart bar owner and a dumb ass bar owner.  Smart ones like Rob's, No Name, Boondocks, Tiki Bar etc do not comment on here when a person doesn't like the place.  A dumb ass like that other local watering hole will comment.  Maybe that is why the other places are still in business and have a better class of clients.  I am still convinced the editor is a bar regular there or may even work there.  Maybe both.
--deedeesails@hotmail.com

[Strict building codes and Code Enforcement are necessary]  Yes, necessary for all, not just us lowly citizens. How about not playing the Builder / Developer game and make them abide by the laws too.  People receiving kick backs should be hanged!

The best lawyers are up in Key Largo.  Not down this way!  Beware.

Mythbusters on TV studied the impact of keeping your toothbrush near the toilet. The results showed it didn't make any difference where you kept it and they had some really nasty stuff in the commode. I think the key down here is to watch where your mouth has been.

Orange Kool-Aid it is then. Please explain to me then why so many military families are on government assistance programs such as the WIC program or receiving welfare benefits? It’s not because they are lazy its because American taxpayers have their priorities in the wrong places. They would rather put the money in their own pockets instead of raising military pays. You seem to confuse Socialism with helping your fellow man. In a Socialist country the government runs the vast majority of that country’s businesses. I’m not sure where you’re getting you facts from, but I’ve never heard anyone pushing for that. Can you name any American politician that has said all businesses must be turned over to the government? Of course no. That’s nothing but FOX-speak and an attempt to demonize another political party. So your contention that only "Hard working" people get large paychecks isn’t reality, it’s a way of allowing you to pat yourself on the back and keep your short arms out of your deep pockets.

If one leaves the deep freeze of PA and travels to Big Pine Key, are you still considered a snow-bird, or would that be a snow-chick? We loved our short visit there, especially to BPK and the friendly, extremely hospitable folks there. Thanks! Next visit maybe we'll catch the Conch Train, and skip the ice cream, but, it was worth it.

Welcome to planet Earth.

I agree with the poster yesterday that the Boomer e-mail thing sounded like someone with no life trying to stir up trouble. It didn't work.

Damn, my name is still Donna!

I have two tickets for Billy Joel in Miami Monday night 2/12/07 and cannot make it. They are 2nd row upper section directly facing the stage. Paid $100 for each will sell for $75 each or best reasonable offer. Call Flip Flop Bob 872-9855 and leave message.

I agree that BigPineKey.com is a good place to advertise, but since I don't charge musicians and bands for helping them promote themselves online, I don't have an ad budget. Some local groups are pretty good at publicizing their gigs, such as Mile Marker 24 and InJade, but others (like the Doerfels) need a little help getting the word out. So I do what I can to help them.

Sometimes I get to write a freelance article for one of the local papers (which I do get paid for), but this year I didn't get to do that for the Doerfels, so I thought posting a message on the Coconut Telegraph would be the next best thing.  Keep up the great work and the great message board!

The people who make the drive down the Keys to work do so because we pay more here than the mainland does. I know there will be a lot of comments on this but it is true.

To the person saying that "he knows a few servicemen living here after serving for many years". After looking back out of curiosity that is exactly what the person you were responding to said. He said it "takes 10 years to make a good wage." And those teachers are single and affording a house here? The point was made about a single person affording a home here for $300.000 like a single person living in other cities in Florida do.

Anna Nicole Smith dropped dead. Guess who’s being questioned?

I must state that I agree with the person who wrote about the 20 second rumble vs. sonic booms.  At our home on Ramrod it seemed more like a long low rumble that you could feel the ground vibrating from; the whole house really.  We looked at each other and said, "What next, Tsunami"?   

Commissioner Murphy Wins The Jackass of the week award. There is a high probability that she will win Jackass of the year award also....Stay Tuned 
--Govwatch05@netscape.com

The deadline for publishing is 6am

Saturday February 10, 2007

Friday February 9, 2007

Anna Nicole Smith dropped dead just like her son did last year. I guess it runs in the family. 

Sonic boom, sonic smooms! That’s just what the government and the big insurance companies want us to believe. A sonic boom is just that one short boom, this was a 20 second rumble from the shifting of tectonic plates under the ocean floor.

[Landlubbers] I’ve always been amazed at the people who move to an island and have no use for the water. It’s especially odd here because these islands are so small and the water is everywhere you turn.

The Keynoter is independently owned and not a part of the Citizen empire.

[Great plan Dr. Einstein] Bus in teachers, firemen, policemen, business managers from Homestead because they cannot afford a house on their wages in the Keys? And that makes sense to you? We know they are nothing but lazy to the great "desk Commandos".

In all my time in the Keys, I’ve never heard anyone complain about the jets training at Boca Chica. I think yesterday’s writer just wanted to mention the great sign at the N.C air base. The Keys have always been very supportive of the air training that goes on here.

Another danger to this small community is the mis-interpretation of email addresses posted next to negative remarks.

[To the Key Deer Bar hater] I'm confused.  The new owner seemed to be defending his establishment and clientele, how is that insulting "community members"?  You, on the other hand seem to be insulting an entire bar over an experience with one person.

And as far as the new owners running it into the ground, there are more cars out in front of the Key Deer Bar than there have been in years.  Good luck to the new folks they seem to be doing well!

With all the great homes for sale I cannot stress enough how important it is to use a good Real Estate Attorney and Title Company.  We moved here from another state and were warned that things could be "goofy" here in The Keys.  A good Lawyer will check out the permits and any foreseeable future issues which could save you a bunch of money and trouble.  It really does pay off to get expert advise and it is just not here in the Lower Keys, but up in Islamorada and Key Largo.  With the shortage of contractors available it would be highly frustrating to build a home. 

This morning came into my email account a copy of a letter to bigpinekey.com's swamarini in all matters large and small, Deer Abby, daring me to publish it . . . So . . .Sloan's Space

BPK Funny Fridays: The comedic calcium for your funny bone! The feather that tickles your fancy! The....um.... the uh.... okay- I guess that's all I've got...

Hallmark is coming out with a new card for guys who forget Valentine's day. The card is small and gold and maxes out at ten grand.   ~Craig Kilborn

You know what they would do? They would come to my elementary school with films to show me how to protect myself from a nuclear-f*ck-holocaust. They would show this giant nuclear-f*cking-bomb just blowing the sh*t out of everything. Goats and monkeys flying everywhere. The windows of the elementary school blown out, the teacher banged up against the f*cking blackboard. But there were the children... hiding safely under their desks.   ~Lewis Black

Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice predicted that the Colts would win [the Super Bowl]. Isn't that unbelievable -- a Bush administration victory announcement that actually came true? ~Jay Leno

You ever been asleep at night, and you're awakened by a noise, and you're convinced there someone breaking into your house and they're gonna kill ya? But instead of getting up, you just go back to bed. "Oh what is that a murderer? I gotta get some sleep... can't kill me if I'm asleep!"That'd be embarrassing... you get to heaven: "Hey, how'd you die?"
"Oh me? I was too lazy to get out of bed. Yeah, I heard the guy in the kitchen and I thought I had an hour."   ~Jim Gaffigan

I just bought a Chihuahua. It's the dog for lazy people. You don't have to walk it. Just hold it out the window and squeeze.   ~Anthony Clark

I don't understand why Cupid was chosen to represent Valentine's Day. When I think about romance, the last thing on my mind is a short, hubby toddler coming at me with a weapon.   ~Paul McGinty

I'm against gay marriage. I think marriage is a sacred union between a man and a pregnant woman.   ~Craig Kilborn

I wanted to make Valentine's Day special, so I tied my boyfriend up. And for three solid hours.... I watched whatever I wanted to on TV.

Wise men say that time is like a river. I say time is like a river of SH*T...and as you float down that river in your little canoe, your paddles are getting smaller and smaller.  ~Lewis Black

This female astronaut ... tried to kidnap and murder another NASA engineer, who was her romantic rival. She put on a wig and attacked the other woman with pepper spray and a BB gun, after driving 900 miles from Houston to Orlando, Florida, in diapers, so she wouldn't have to stop to pee. She drove 900 miles wearing diapers, thus breaking the old record set by Larry King.  ~Jay Leno

There's a big love triangle. This woman astronaut was going to kidnap another woman because they were in love with the same guy. So this woman astronaut drives 900 miles wearing a wig and a diaper. This is one giant step for man, one giant leap to the nuthouse ~David Letterman

She drove 900 miles in a diaper. That's pretty amazing. Britney Spears can't even make it around the block in her underpants.   ~David Letterman

A female astronaut has been arrested for attacking another astronaut's girlfriend with a BB gun, a mallet, and pepper spray, after she drove 900 miles wearing a diaper. After hearing about it, NASA officials said, "We may need to add a new question to the astronaut entrance exam." ~Conan O'Brien

It turns out the female astronaut was trying to kidnap the other woman because they're both in love with the same astronaut. The male astronaut was disappointed the female astronaut was arrested and said, "I was hoping to get some tang." ~Conan O'Brien

Sleep can make you give up any principle...
"Hey do you want to help the homeless?"
"Yeah sure, I'll help the homeless."
"Alright, meet you Saturday at 6:00am."
"Oh, f*ck the homeless, they're homeless in the afternoon too. I think they're big brunch people. We should let them sleep in a little bit." ~Jim Gaffigan

I don't mean to be gross, but the only time it's ok to say, 'I have diarrhea,' is when you're playing Scrabble....... because it's worth a sh*tload of points.  
~Zach Galifianakis

How come girls can say, 'I'm going to go to brunch with my girlfriend', and no one assumes anything, but when I say, 'I'm going to buy fanny packs with my boyfriend', people assume I'm gay?    ~Zach Galifianakis

I was over in Australia, and everyone's like: "Are you proud to be an American?" And I was like, "Um, I don't know, I didn't have a lot to do with it. You know, my parents f*cked there, that's about all."   ~Bill Hicks

I have some sad news for the gays, as they're referred to. Unfortunately, they have lost one of their own this evening -- Ted Haggard, the evangelical preacher, who as you know, was caught doing meth and f**king dudes. The Denver Post is reporting that he is now "completely heterosexual." ... People say how did they ... turn this clearly gay man into a heterosexual? It's very simple. You know when you were a kid and your father caught you smoking. Then he decided to make you smoke a carton. Ted's been a busy boy. ~Jon Stewart

I once went into a Sears to buy a workbench. It came in a big, big box, and there was some assembly required. There were instructions, but I didn't need those. Hey, I'm a guy; my balls will tell me how it all fits together.  ~Tim Allen

My uncle invented the solar-powered funeral home. It's got basic solar technology: Big solar panels on the roof, the sun beats down, it heats up the panels. Trouble is, it can't cremate... it can only poach.  
~Heywood Banks

Pie can't compete with cake. Put candles in a cake, it's a birthday cake. Put candles in a pie, and somebody's drunk in the kitchen.  
~Jim Gaffigan

At what age do you tell a highway it was adopted? I think seven, because that's about the time he starts to think, "I don't look like Kiwanis Club."
~Zach Galifianakis

I can't believe I actually own my own house. I'm looking at a house; it's five-hundered grand. The realtor says, "It's got a great view." For five-hundered grand I better open up the curtains and see breasts against the window. 
~Garry Shandling

I went into a deli and got an egg sandwich and a hot chocolate. And then I went outside and I had to get a cab, so I had to put up one of my hands. But I already started eating my sandwich; I took it out of the bag, I was impatient. So my choice was hold up an egg sandwich or hold up a hot chocolate to get a car. So I chose the hot chocolate. And I put it up there and no cab stopped and I realized it was because I looked like I was toasting traffic. Standing on the street, "Here’s to you guys... to everybody heading west... I just wanna say I like what you do… but one of you needs to stop and pick me up."   ~Demetri Martin

A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk backseat driver if he’s persuasive.
"Dude make a left."
"Those are trees…"
"Trust me."            ~Demetri Martin

There’s a new ferry service from Miami to Key West for $100 round trip. It leaves Miami at 8:30 am and returns at 9:30pm. Cuba ferry service should be next.

All the people complaining about a guy who likes a girl named Donna should be happy to see a change.  90% or more of the things posted on here are negative comments.  Someone writes happy thoughts and people still bitch.  One person even suggested we keep Donna in the personals.  Obviously this person didn't take a minute to read the personals.  There has been an ad seeking Donna for several days now.

I am one pissed Hungarian! I bought a one acre lot on Key Deer Blvd for the purpose of building a home. I must inform you that the land was purchased in '82 on a 10 year easy purchase plan. In '92 when it was paid off, I wanted to build on it. I was told that I can't because my land has been annexed by the Fish and Wildlife and now is part of the Blue Heron Wildlife Preserve. I called the F&W and told them that I wanted to sell my land. They informed me that they can't buy it because they lack of funds. I love wild life more than most. I had to pay property tax on this land every year. When I was deported in '99 the taxes almost doubled. I kept bombarding the F&W with letters and finally in 2004 I was offered

$11,000 for my land. By my math I lost about $4,000, thank you Florida F&W.  Next time wait until I bend over. I'm super pissed!

I spoke with a FEMA worker after Wilma who had been in New Orleans.  His description was that in the Keys everyone wanted to help everyone else; in New Orleans no one cared about anyone but themselves.

What’s the gossip as to why the Terry Cassidy’s Pickin’ party got changed from the Chamber to Coconuts? And why was Captain Dan let go?

Affordable housing! We have plenty of it. Out on the bridges in them little tents!

[More bleach in the gene pool] Neil Rodreick II, 29, shaved his body and posed as a 12-year-old boy, and then allegedly had sex with Lonnie Stiffler, 61, and Robert Snow, 43, in Chino Valley, Ariz., before all three were arrested in January (as the result of Stiffler's attempt to enroll Rodreick in a charter school as a boy). The two men were said to have been quite upset when police told them Rodreick was not 12 years old.

I was told that old Rt 939b, 4a and Loop Rd (square circle) were going to be reopened for the new over night camp ground at the cut on 4a. True or not true?

[Good search engine for archives] Go to Google, type site: BigPineKey.com ‘what you want to search for’ A free toolbar is available from Google that has this automatic option.

[About SPAM] Microsoft Internet Explorer 6 and 7 have extensive SPAM blocking tools, so does MSN, Comcast and other internet service providers. You must read the Help sections of your browser and the providers to set up what you need. Computers cannot think so you have to, even though it hurts!

[She's b-a-a-a-c-k] Isn't it strange how our editor will protect Key Deer but not No Name, Tiki Bar, Robs or Boondocks?  They are all chastised here every day.  The Editor printed many nasty things being said about Linda at the pub who is a wonderful person but names people for commenting on Key Deer.  Maybe the Editor is one of the regulars at Key Deer.  That would explain why he didn't protect a local dentist.  Most Key Deer barflies have no need for a dentist.
--deedeesails@hotmail.com

[Dee Dee strikes back] So now I am insulting community members? Since I only mentioned her, I am assuming she is speaking on behalf of multiple personalities, or (in a revealing moment of classlessness) herself and vibrator she spoke so highly of. (by the way, get a personality and you won't need one).

This is a woman who has referred to a large group of Big Pine Residents as "toothless, smelly and disease-ridden" yet, I am the bad guy in her addled little brain because I defended those people against her delusional rants. As for "running the place into the ground"? The numbers have been through the roof since we took over, thank you very much. We have received hundreds of compliments from far and wide and people who have not been there in a while are coming back.

Yes, there are members of the community I do not want in here, drug dealers, thieves, and anyone who is going to get dumped at the bar and then go online and spout off about invisible attackers. The other bars are welcome to have them. I don't need the money so badly that I am going to turn the place into a dive. And when all the normal people don't want to go someplace like that, they will come here.

Now, onto the most hilarious part of the latest missive from Bedlam, I imagine that if I called the DEA and said, "Hey, would you guys mind if I borrowed a drug dog for the evening?" they would drop-ship one right on the front stoop with a big bow; maybe I should ask them for a pony too.

Dee Dee, if you think I am an ass, that pleases me greatly, because an ass looking in a mirror would not see an ass