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Archives of Old Kudos and Whiners

February 2006

Tuesday February 28, 2006


Sunshine investigations by the attorney general for the gang of three. Justice may be on the way and the wailing you here are the developers crying.
If you're a long tem resident you've seen what happened to Key West and their lost battle to control development. They allowed exceptions to their guidelines and got sued by everybody else and lost. Now there are condos everywhere. McDonalds and Denny's and others are downtown right in the heart of the historic district.
I have to say I'm tickled pink about Publix coming to Big Pine and that sleazy flea market closing. Publix will not impact US1 like on Saturdays with the flea market. Let's redevelop our sore spots with taste. I own a business on the overseas highway and I welcome the competition from Publix selling orchids. Let's smile and get it done.
President Bush is truing hard to be a great president, but I don't think that'll ever happen.
Turning over our ports to anyone in the Mideast is like someone robbing you with help from an accomplice and later that accomplice comes looking to you for a job. Should you hire him? I don't think so. It's the possibility of wrong that I consider.

It looks like the uproar over the spy towers is over even though they're still watching us. I still don't like them. I don't think I'll ever get used to them like most of the other sheep.
[Weather Channel] Why don't you just tune to the weather channel on TV? Why waste Ed's time?



Dennis Weaver is kaput!
FOR SALE: 10 National and 5 International airports, 27 Nuclear Power Facilities. Terms: cash only and you must be from a country the US recognizes as a host to terrorists. Interested parties should call Dick Or George at 1-800-DUMB-ASS.
From reading the comments on this site, I've come to the following conclusions; 1. Explaining how the meat packing industry works is "mean-spirited", but bashing the explainer is not.
2. Having numerous banks, real estate offices, and marine stores makes Big Pine "unique", but adding another grocery store and possibly a fast food restaurant will destroy it's charm.
3. There is no limit to the amount of tourists these islands can support, but a few more homes will ruin the environment for all future generations (and probably cause global warming). If you think math is tough, try to make sense of liberal logic. It just makes my head spin thinking about it.
I am one of the few remaining native Floridians left in this state and have been coming to the Keys since the very early 60's.  My father was stationed at the Key West Naval base every summer for a month for his active duty assignment and I have seen the decline of the water quality and natural surroundings over the years. Notwithstanding,  I have recently been fortunate enough, after working very hard for years, to be able to purchase what will be a vacation home for a few years and ultimately our retirement home. I have a real interest not just as a Floridian but also as a property owner in keeping the island as beautiful and protected as reasonably possible.

 I have my primary residence in central Fl. and we have had a huge growth boom up here much to my dismay. The one thing I have learned from participating in the legal process for growth and development is that there is no way to stop it.  The best and most effective thing we can do is to take control of the growth and development and make sure it results in the least intrusive, most aesthetically pleasing and least environmentally damaging result.

People who simply want to refuse to allow any change will ultimately lose; and what happens is that the people promoting growth or change will just decide that they can never please these people and will do whatever they want and can get away with.  If we can somehow band together to get control on the proposed growth and require that reasonable restrictions be imposed governing appropriate landscaping, set backs from the highway, height restrictions, appropriate types of business' etc. we will be able to keep our island beautiful while at the same time controlling and allowing the inevitable change.  If however, we simply just keep saying no to every proposed change will will lose and Big Pine will not only lose the character it has been able to maintain in the face of aggressive developers and politicians but we will lose every possibility of maintaining some type of control over what  ultimately does become of the island. People, lets be smart.

I can't be down there for most meetings and I guess some will say that since I am not present I should not be heard to comment. I hope that is not the case with the majority of you; and I hope common sense prevails over blind stubbornness when requests for proposals or new proposals are presented for consideration. 
[to design our island to be completely unique and homey] How can an island with McDonalds, etc be homey? Wake up. If you permit one formula chain store the rest will come. It's in the US Constitution. We cannot discriminate. Are you wearing blinders?

Yesterday's writer wants another chain pharmacy. The writer the day before wants a Target Store. It seems everyone wants another chain to suit themselves. And that is exactly what our unique island will be like. Anytown, USA. Look at the big picture not just your own selfish needs.

The person with the family farm (I really believe that). Most likely you eat anything thrown in front of you. If there are mean people writing in, you might be one of them. In your post: "jerks", idiot", ridiculous question", it seems to me when you use abusive language, it's no surprise to get it back, is it? Other than that we're sure you're eligible for sainthood.

So anyway, lets be locally proactive, and expand the animal cruelty laws to include fishing. Good idea. Come on people, what do you say? Isn't it better to be even-handed and consistent across the board? They're sentient beings and we're all from Bethlehem. Great. Yes, we've got the Iguana Police, the Tree Police, the Dog Walking Police, the Trash Police, the Topic Police, the Noise Police, Bike Path Police, Construction and Land Use Police, Internet Police, Pollution Police, Sex Police, Slander Police, Thought Police. "...and thick and fast they came at last, and more, and more, and more..." (all self appointed). But I think we've really identified an opportunity here. A real need we've got to get behind and push this thing through. Who's with me?
I don't know if any of the No Name Key residents are online here but I sure would like to hear what it is like with no paid utilities and how well those solar roof units work.  Are the solar units just for hot water or do some of them generate electricity?  I see some of you have monster generators.  I'm just curious and wonder if one (or more) of you could chat about it for the inquiring mind. Do the people on No Name ever want utilities?
I was just thinking if Osama ever did us any real harm we all could really learn a lesson on living, without the umbilical cords from the utilities from those who do it by choice every day.
People don't, or won't realize why the rain forests are being destroyed. They are cutting them down to raise scrub (fast growing junk meat) cattle to supply the fast fart industries. The burger you eat costs the world an air-making-tree somewhere in the rain forest. Australia is another junk meat provider, but their trees are long gone. Go ahead, build your McDonalds, your Burger Kings and your other garbage outlets. I'll never eat that crap, and I have the sense to keep my kids healthy, not turn them into mutants.

"Mariners Resort, a defunct motel property with 26 development units, could now be worth $6 million to the right buyer." Neugent said on Friday. "Those 26 transient units have increased in value exponentially, so how do we turn that property into $6 million to buy the flea market?" Neugent asked. "The Mariners property would either be a Pritim Singh development or a wastewater plant." 

Does anyone beside myself think that good old George is threatening the people who live around the resort. Talk about the gang of three George is his own gang of one.





I am very happy that country music is back. And they don't sing about trains and drinking and unfaithful women, they sing about American!
[Happy graphic-er] Thanks for the kudos, ed. Glad you liked the "Big Pine Grind". Sometimes I enjoy doing original stuff instead of reprinting others' material for Funny Fridays. I'll send some more every now & then... and I'll still be doing Funny Fridays.
(After all, you did dub me "humor editor" or "ambassador de chuckles" or some such thing...)
Much better than a great story...much much better. This story that ran last week on CBS World News, it is a great story. http://youtube.com/watch?v=UBYPaNc57Ik&search=autism%20basketball
[Peace & Love]  The Editor edited my post and I saved the e-mail on my views on racism.  In fact, I would say that it is very ugly and dim-witted people should keep their hate to themselves.  Peace and Love.  (Meaning that racism is ugly.) 
R Kelly was really creative when he was pissing on that 12 yr old, huh? And How bout all those shootings and drug charges tied to Hip Hop Music? I say help save the arts. Shoot a rapper!
I heard the Cracked Egg closed because they were sick and tired of the snowbirds. They will reopen when they all go home!
To the person that found a creature on their dock. I wouldn't monkey with it if I were you!
[Country Music] If you want to listen to Jazz please go back to New Jersey. You are in the south. We have been listening to country music long before some dam transplant from New Jersey wanted some other kind of music. Nobody likes to listen to jazz, but country music is one of the most popular types of music in the country.



Separated at Birth? Don Knotts and Mick Jagger?  Same lips and cheekbones.  No?
[Those who want the canals unplugged] Come on, be honest. You just want the canals unplugged so the value of your house goes up $100,000. You can talk about nature, but it's really just about money now, isn't it?
The Florida State Pie should be Muffy Pie.


[BPK Monkeys/Apes] I'm not sure what I caught a picture of with the wind blowing badly Sunday  night. I thought I heard something out by the canal. Man, whatever it was smelled and it was pretty fast. I only got one picture of it.
What ever happened to the Moose Club? I used to be able to go to the Bulletin Board to see their upcoming event schedule?
Contact your commissioners and tell them we want a vote on chain stores. This is still a democracy. I've even done all the work for you. (with a little help from this sites' Business Directory>Government) we're going to have to live with whatever decision they make and it is too large a change for them to decide by themselves. Let the people make the decision.
McCoy boccdis3@monroecounty-fl.gov (305)-292-3430
Nelson boccdis5@monroecounty-fl.gov (305)852-7175
Neugent boccdis2@monroecounty-fl.gov  (305)872-1678
Rice boccdis4@monroecounty-fl.gov (305)289-6000
Spehar boccdis1@monroecounty-fl.gov (305)292-3440


Rules for Non-Pet Owners Who Visit and then Complain About Our Pets
1. The pets live here. You don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the furniture. (That's why it's called

     fur-niture.)    
3. To you, our pets are just animals. To us, they are an adopted son/daughter who happens
    to be hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.

4. Dogs and cats are better than kids because:  a) they don't ask for money all the time 

     b) they are easier to train c) they usually come when called d) they  don't hang out with

     drug-using friends e) they don't need a gazillion dollars for a college education, and  f) if they get pregnant,  you can sell the off-spring.
[Build a place to serve the hungry masses] This propaganda is from the Big Boys trying to sway the opinion to build more fast fart joints on BPK. If you people read the "For Development" pieces stuck into this blog, you can see the hype being shoved up you arses. They want the money, and could care less about the Keys, your way of life and our future!  Money, it's all about money. Never forget that.
I say Kudos to the person lashing back at those who tried to bash them for saying that they eat meat if it is humanely killed.  Good for you.  I agree that there are some people here that are way too judgmental.  I sometimes wonder if our wonderful editor should maybe post all email addresses after each post, so we can see who is writing these nasty posts.  That would stop a lot of this bull, so we can get on to the important stuff.
There have been several postings on this website recently favoring the opening of the plugged canals which I assume are mostly the ones on Big Pine, or Ramrod. Someone mentioned that water quality should not be an issue because the plugged canals are cleaner than the nearby open canals. Believe it or not, this is true. Neighbors groups have hired biologists and water quality specialists to test the water of the plugged canals as part of a number of lawsuits and governmental actions to try and get the canals open. There has never ever been any evidence presented by the Army Corp of Engineers, DEP, Big Pine Civic Association, or anyone, that has definitively refuted what the independent water quality specialists have testified to. Bottom line, there is no reason why the plugged canals should not be open.

But why should they be open? Well, Commissioner George Neugent has recently gone on record as being concerned about a very important issue that is becoming a growing national concern (but even of more concern here in the Keys) which is shrinking water access. That is, public marinas are being sold to private condo developers who will now charge a million and a half even if you just want to look at the water. Then, if you add to the snatching of water access by developers the damage that Wilma did, you have even less access. Since I don't have open canal access, I have to trailer my boat and am dependant on the local public and private boat ramps. Well, thanks to Wilma, one of my favorite ramps on Pirates Road was washed away. This was a great little ramp with access to both the Atlantic and the back country, but now it's gone and by Army Corp of Engineers rules cannot be replaced or repaired. One down, less access.

Many of my neighbors who live on the plugged canals have spent much time and money in an effort to get them open as they were originally intended to be. However, they have only been met with bureaucracy and indifferent and even arrogant government agencies who are supposed to be working "for" the people not against them. So, I am hoping that Commissioner Neugent (who I carbon copied when I sent this e-mail) will read this and take up this cause and help his constituents obtain something that we have not been able to obtain for ourselves. This is an open request to all the Commissioner's, but especially, Commissioner Neugent to help the people who elected you and have confidence in you to represent them and help them in this issue of opening the canals. Thank you for your help on our behalf.
How do you "humanely kill"?  There is no such thing.  Any time you end an animals' life to eat, there is no humane act involved.  Survival, yes.  And every day in Monroe County thousands of people hunt, stalk, lure and then very barbarically kill animals.  It is called fishing.  No felonies are involved.  I have no opinion of these issues but the stuff is knee deep from the Humanity side.  Find another venue to beat your chest and tell me how pure you are.
[You should see what we don't print] Ed, I'd like to. Why don't you just bleep out the swearing and print what everyone sends in? If the thin skinned folks don't like it they can just build a bridge and get over it. (Catchy phrase, huh? I'm pretty sure I read it on this site.)
[The working class is leaving the Keys] Because we can't afford to live here, not because there are no jobs. We get paid in chicken feed. It costs the average person $18.57 an hour to live in the Keys. That's net income. Got kids? Double it. The "Development Formula" is working just the way the banks, the politicos, and the developers designed it to do. To push out the old property owners for the land. Wait until 2010, you won't be allowed on the Keys without a permit. They'll be nothing here but mansions and the disgustingly rich, and the environmentalists will be long gone enjoying their payoffs.




Fat Tuesday! NOLA.com: BourboCAM

Tuesday February 28, 2006

 

Monday February 26, 2006

Congratulations to Dennis and Carmela. Great party!
I love your web site!  But do you think you could ad on the weather channel or another weather web site on here?  Thank you!
(Ed: This is good. Some of you people out there are incredible with graphics [and humor])
I have to go either to Key West or Marathon or Islamorada to get something good to eat. What is wrong with Big Pine Key's eateries?
A school zone is a school zone. Period. And should be respected as so no matter where it is.


I would like to have my motorcycle airbrushed with a design that I have made. Does anyone know of a reputable painter that will airbrush my scooter?
[Chain Stores] Isn't the Post Office a chain?  Sure glad we have one and I hope it's grandfathered in. It'd be a pain to drive to the big city to mail a package.
New Jersey's tourist council had a contest for a new ad slogan. One of the losers was, "New Jersey, it's not as bad as it smells."
Bode Miller, "I Got to Party and Socialize at an Olympic Level". To bad he thinks partying is more important than being a class act.

After years of debate, a ban on all new retail businesses on Big Pine went into effect.  With retirements and closure of long established outlets formerly owned by long time residents. Only so called "Mom and Pop" outlets can be established along the U.S.1 corridor.  The first new outlet to open is a food service business that complies with all of the prevailing ordinances and restrictions.
Can not believe Neugent is suggesting to turn the flea market property into a park used as a staging and distribution area for disaster response much like the Habitat building was after Hurricane Wilma. You have got to be kidding me this is a joke, right?
This guy has got to go!

Unlike a lot of people who live down here, I prefer hip-hop music over that mindless redneck wailing called country. Hip-hop reflects the inner beauty and sensitivity of the artist, while the yahoos sing about trains, trucks, drinking and unfaithful women. None of those country songs approach the creativity and depth of songs by R. Kelly, Usher or Lil' Jon.
About the country music being back on the radio in the lower Keys. Thank you, thank you, thank you. It's one of the best things that's happened around here in a while.
[Unplug the canals] Go look at the pipe at the end of the canal at Looe Key Reef Resort on Ramrod Key, it is the most remote canal from open ocean, and the cleanest. That pipe has been there for many many years and does not clog up and the flushing keeps that water very clean and clear.


It's all about money!
I see that CVS has some new landscaping which does improve the looks of the store and surrounding area. Now if they could just get their prescription refills down to at least a day and a half.

Coco's at W/D plaza has a great breakfast.   Rob, Capt .Dan start serving breakfast because the other two can't get help or they are very difficult to work for.  Who out there knows the real problem? Inquiring  Piner's want to know.
One thing is ever true about Big Pine Key. We will always be divided regarding our island. The problem I see as a long time resident is that many people come from elsewhere and know how we should have things here. I am a firm believer that Big Pine needs to come into the current times. To limit growth to only replacing what is already here is ridiculous. Believe me, I don't want to see Big Pine 4-laned and covered with the giant conglomerate cardboard cutout stores, but we do need another drug store among some other things.

We have grown way beyond the available resources already established here.   We have the ability to design our island to be completely unique and homey with the ability to get our prescriptions in a timely manner and maybe have a bit of a variety of food choices or grocery stores.

Why are we happy to search for a shopping cart or wait in line on the seasonal weekend for 20 minutes to buy a loaf of bread? We have a business area that is in desperate need of improvement. How difficult would it be to compromise between opposing sides. There is a reasonability of both sides to this dispute. Why can't we have some growth that is hidden from view with landscaping as Key Largo did?



Thanks to those of you who inquired about the restaurant not being open last week. I would like to take a moment to apologize to all of our loyal guests for this unfortunate situation. The restaurant is now open again for breakfast, lunch and dinner services. To clarify, we did not close due to lack of employees. Unfortunately I, (John) suffered an injury that prevented my ability to work. The injury was spinal cord related, so it took the better part of the week just for me to be to be able to stand up again. Again, thanks to those who inquired. Our staff sincerely apologizes to all for our interruption in service. Thank you for your understanding. Sincerely, The entire staff at Big Pine Restaurant.


[Believe it or not!] I'm not sure what kind this is but I found it on my dock. He seems to be doing okay.  What should I do with it? 
Everyone knows Country music belongs in Nashville, Texas, Oklahoma and the Dakotas with the horses and the boots and hats.  The Keys have their own brand of music with tropical flair and a little bit of Jazz thrown in.  We aren't complaining, we just want our station back.  You want to listen to country--we want to listen to Jazz.
Key Lime vs Pecan the Great Florida Pie Fight. The debate over what pie should be the official Florida State pie is on again. You didn't know there is no designation for a State pie? Well your incredible Florida government representatives have not been able to decide what should be the official state pie. It has been debated a number of times beginning in 1988.

Now this isn't about which pie you would prefer to eat. It is about which pie better represents Florida. How could the pecan pie, which is Georgia's state pie, possibly represent Florida .

So let's demand our representatives to do the right thing and finally make the Key Lime Pie the official State of Florida pie.
[You only eat humanely killed animals?]  How dare you accuse me of being one of those "ignorant pussies who are completely removed from the process"?  You don't know me. I hope I don't know you.
 
No, I don't buy meat in a tidy little package!  What meat I do eat comes from my family's farm, where the animals are killed in a very humane manner.  So, no, I don't "patronize the meat industry", and, no, I don't fish either for the same reasons.
 
And, you, the one who is chastising the slaughter houses and such for their cruel treatment of animals, and then you turn around and refer to the people killing the iguanas as "folks who are doing nothing but trying to hold down a locus-like scourge"...wow, now who is the hypocritical jackass?
 
Editor, you really have some mean-spirited people post on this site. (Ed: You should see what we don't print)









There goes the neighborhood!
Anyone know where I can get a Hav-A-Hart trap so I can catch some of these New Jersey breeders and have them neutered?
Ed: If the readers can get past the Kudos and Whiners (which is fantastic), there is a World out there that you have created.  Business, Classified, Etc., Etc. Thanks for the web site.
If you own the land and want to plant any darn tree you wish you should be able to plant the tree.  If you would like to trim, or change, any trees and bushes on your land you should be able to do as you wish. 

This greenie stuff has, as usual, gone way too far.  Just keep on writing your congressmen, senators local leaders and don't give up.  I am seeing chinks in the armor and it is not going to come back to normal overnight.  If you have a pepper tree growing in your yard and you do not want to pull it up you can keep them!  The last time I looked, the good old red, white and blue was still flying over this land.
[Very ugly and dim-witted people] This is your idea of "not hating?" Peace and love to you too, honey
Those who hate the local radio stations and TV.  Does anyone out there still watch analog TV and regular commercial radio?  I sometimes switch on Biz Baz and the 8:00 news cast because it's fun to hear what's for sale, but face it, things are changing. The majority of folks have cable or Direct TV and just pay for the great stations. 

I got tired of being spoon-fed my news by ABC, NBC and CBS.  You might as well be watching Michael Moore and Moveon.org for all the real news you get.  Public TV started off trying, but was soon taken over by the loonies.  Its very cheap to get the special radio and listen to XM or Sirius Satellite. You can get business and stock market channels to keep you up to date with investments.  I don't listen to much music, but there are, I guess, hundreds of music stations of every possible flavor so you can be free at last and listen to what you want.  The comedy channels have me in stitches and the mysteries are fab on a long trip. The little XM radio snaps out of your vehicle and into the house in a sec and is very inexpensive.  So there is another way to get your tunes and of course there is all ways Ipod.
[Statistically Blonde haired people have higher IQ's than people of other hair colors!] I saw those statistics too and almost believed it -- until I found out it was researched by a blonde. In the words of that famous blonde, Barbie, "Math is tough".
[Would you hire me to do a job at $50.00 per hour if you could pay somebody $30.00 per hour] Yeah, if I was being held hostage by a union and had no choice. But only until I could move my factory/business offshore.

What is with the mystery ice cream man of Eden pines? He comes around about every 4 months or so. You can here his jingle and you think he's coming. It could be at whatever time of the night he fells like it. Then he completely skips a couple of streets. One time during a cold front he was ringing his jingle at 9:30 at night. I still tried to get an ice cream but he skipped our street again. Do you only come out when you need money because you have one hell of a wacky setup?
To the persons bashing the person that said they do eat meat, as long as the animal was killed in a humane way. What is your problem?  I have never seen so many judgmental people as come on this website.  I guess if that person had stated that they were a vegetarian you would have been complaining that the plants have feelings too. 
 
The whole point this person was making is pretty plain to me.  If you kill an iguana or any other critter, for that matter, in an inhumane and cruel manner then you have committed a felony.  Period.  If you are going out tracking these animals down and killing them, then you are hunting, which is not allowed in this county.  Period.  End of story.
I love this website.  It always gives me at least one thing to giggle about.  I hate that the Keys are changing, but so is everyplace else. 



[Breakfast Suggestions] Galley Grill is open every morning with happy waitresses at 7 am. You can count on those folks to be open every day with big, tasty, inexpensive eats. It is a family owned place so they don't appear to suffer from lack of help. My wife and I don't bother with the Coffee Shop and Cracked Egg anymore. However, Marathon has two excellent spots for eggs, etc. We like Stout's and The Stuffed Pig.
Joni Mitchell had it right, "They paved paradise and put up a parking lot." (Of course it has nice landscaping.)
(?)Whoa, talk about getting skinned alive, that was a real dressing down. It has put me on a new diet as well. Enjoy your Jimmy Dean's, everyone.

Monday February 26, 2006

 

Sunday February 26, 2006
Big Pine Key is now divided by those who want to preserve the rural flavor and those who want a cleaner modern town. We need the majority to decide such an important issue. We need a vote.


How long does Visa and Mastercard keep credit card receipts? They must have a treasure trove of signatures they could resell to collectors. Is that ethical?
If the formula retail ban does go to a vote; are there enough whackos left down here all year to continue the Greenie trend?  I wonder.  It seems to me that you made it so good to be a Fl citizen that 75% of home owners down here have switched and now can vote.  Now your taxes are going to go up also.  It took the Snowbirds a while to get educated on how they were paying the majority of the taxes; so now who is voting?  It should be a majority of the property owners that vote and I think it will be soon.  Keep in mind the majority of people that vote, now are renters, and since the rents keep on going up they will get a different type of voter down here.  Snowbirds rule?


[Blondes] Statistically Blonde haired people have higher IQ's than people of other hair colors! It's all the dummies that dye their hair blonde that give blondes a bad name.
Tommy's memorial was today at a close friend's home. Family and friends were present to tell Tommy stories. He was brave and lived life his way. He will be missed.
What is a BB web site?
I understand that both BP Coffee Shop and the Cracked Egg are, or were closed because they have absolutely no help. I guess they will have to import people from Miami  like W/D. The working class is leaving and they want to build more and larger stores here what a joke.

[The school zone on US1 in Marathon is a joke] US1 happens to be one of the longest highways in the country, and people build schools on its edge like it was a side street. We have to crawl through that intersection because of idiots!  Why doesn't Marathon stick a toll booth there too?  Stupid politicos and builders are to blame.
[Racism]  Is this learned from ones' parents?  I learned to not hate.  Kind of like Politics and Religion. This is not a nice subject to put out there.  In fact, I would say that it is the very ugly and dim-witted people that should keep their hate to themselves.  Peace and Love.   
(?)To Formula Retail Ordinance. If you didn't vote what should you Care?
[Long Shoreman's Union] Would you hire me to do a job at $50.00 per hour if you could pay somebody $30.00 per hour to do the same exact Job.


Translation of the Quran to English:  http://www.ahadees.com/english-translation.html  And I thought the Bible was BS!
From reading the explanation of the Formula Retail Ban it seems clear that it was written for one purpose: allow any development that benefits tourism (hotels, real estate offices, eco traps) and ban anything that benefits locals (drugstores, grocery stores, evil corporate owned businesses, except Holiday Inn, Century21, etc.). So, I guess it's better that Big Pine looks like a tourist trap than "Anytown USA"?
Everyone knows Country music has its roots in the South, and you don't get any farther South than Key West!  So why don't all you Jazz people who keep complaining about Conch 98.7 go to Saint Louis or New Orleans.



Upon learning that Fish and Wildlife planned to neuter and relocate all feral cats on Big Pine, Snookums the cat went postal. Posing as a tourist from New Jersey, he stormed the refuge visitor center with gun blazing. The volunteers and staff fled the scene, leaving the tourists to fend for themselves. No endangered stuffed animal was left standing. He managed to escape before SWAT arrived (the next day), but several eyewitnesses reported him yelling, "I'm not alone!"
Someone should tell the owners of the Underseas Dive Shop that there is going to be a presentation of some kind, entitled "Evil Trees in the Keys" on  Thurs. March 9 on Big Pine Key near the No Name Pub. I copied the info number down. It is 872-8888.
[Talking to God] He says just do it. You don't need the bells, whistles or falderal. He was intelligent to create this earth and man and women with their amazing physicality, why would he need formality? Just talk to him, like you do your best friend. If you'll do this, you will start feeling his presence. He likes humility. He gets disheartened when we go through pain, yet is still there to help, for now and always. Period.

What a shame. It's not even 10:00 PM on a Saturday night and I'm home going to bed alone. All the guys out tonight were obnoxious drunks in need of a bath. No wonder I utilize my "Hook Up Guy" so much. Damn him for going away this week end. Thank God a girl has a toy to fall back on. Hurry back I need some good loving.
You only eat humanely killed animals? What abattoir have you visited lately? The factory farms and assembly line slaughter houses don't have time for humane euthanasia, and the only way to be sure is to kill your own. But of course, you ingest nothing but kindness. Oh yeah, I'll bet you can just taste all that juicy humanity. I have much more respect and sympathy for those who take on the bloody task themselves than I do for you ignorant pussies who are completely removed from the process; and to whom meat is only some pink matter in a tidy little package.

Pigs are chained to the floor in tiny cells, so as to protect the suckling young, and not allowed to move for weeks on end, while they nearly suffocate on ammonia laden air. Cattle are routinely thrown on to hooks upside down, still writhing, bellowing and screaming because of imperfect kill methods, many are still conscious while they're skinned, and nobody cares because of sheer numbers. Most every animal slaughtered in common practice experiences periods of terror in anticipation of pain and death, while most hunted wild animals at least have a chance, and don't know what is coming when they're hit. I don't eat meat because I can't cut it when it comes to killing my own.

Fishing is anything but humane, but I'll bet you don't have a problem with that. Long periods of terror and death by suffocation isn't my idea of kindness. Why don't you campaign against that? C'mon, get on the horn to the Sheriff's Department, quick! No? Probably because you know you'd be taken out and summarily drowned. If you patronize the meat industry, and then call police on folks who are doing nothing but trying to hold down a locus-like scourge, you are one hypocritical jackass, not the enlightened, sensitive,  humanitarian you think.

Now that the new country station is here, I am looking forward to the stuff that goes with it such as line dancing,  a race track suitable for NASCAR, big haired women, and folks who look like the banjo player from Deliverance. And for you complainers, remember it could have been worse. The station could have switched from jazz to hip-hop.
(?)To Chain store meetings,  Guess this means your still in the Closet.
California couldn't find one doctor to administer a lethal injection to a death row inmate scheduled to be exterminated. The doctors cited the first rule of medicine--Do no harm! It looks like they're going to have to release Dr. Kevorkian if they want to kill anyone that way.
[What happened to PIKn country] They sold out to big brother, so now big brother can beam radio Marti on FM to Cuba.





[Only eat humanely killed animals] What is it with you hypocrites? Out of sight, out of mind? Cows are killed with a pneumatic hammer to the head. Ow, that's got to hurt!
Florida has 16% black population,  Georgia is 28.7% black, Mississippi 37% and South Carolina 30%. Yankees take note, New York State is 17.8% black. Massachusetts 6.7%, Vermont 0.6%, New Hampshire 0.9%, New Jersey 14.5%, Connecticut 10%, Maine 0.6% Pennsylvania 10.3%, Rhode Island 5.9%.

Back to the south. Tennessee 16.7% black, North Carolina 21.9%, Virginia 20%, Alabama 26.4%, Louisiana 32.9%, Texas
11.6%.
 
Midwest, Ohio 11.7%, Illinois 15.2%, Indiana 8.6%, Iowa 2.3%.

Mid-North, Wisconsin 5.9%, Minnesota 3.9%, Michigan 14.4% N. Dakota 0.8%, S. Dakota 0.8%, Montana 0.4%.

Northwest, Idaho 0.6%, Washington 3.5%, Oregon 1.8%.

California is just 6.9% black; Colorado 4.2%.

If you want to find the most lily-white areas, look where the blowhard politicians are pissing and moaning the loudest about racial equality they don't have to deal with in the real world. We southerners should instruct our senators and representatives to start carping at the northern politicians about the problems they have with their snow and ice. It would make about as much sense. 

What's up with breakfast dining in Big Pine Key?  I was down there last week and didn't find either of our usual breakfast cafes open.  Maybe someone should open a place that can stay open to serve the hungry masses.  They would make a killing!

Apparently there is some confusion as to the meaning of being against the Formula Retail Ordinance.  Some people think that being against it means that you are not in favor the retail stores.  I talked to a woman yesterday that said “I’m really against that law.  I don’t want to have a Home Depot here.”  I asked her, “how about a Target store” and she said, “That might not be too bad.”  Just goes to show you that in any group there are a percentage who don’t have a clue and are simply cluttering up the gene pool but still get to vote.



This week marked the tenth anniversary of the Brothers to the Rescue plane being shot down over Cuba in which two men died.
Some brilliant posts yesterday.  Letting the development companies use heavy landscaping, soft colors, and smaller signs would not bother me.  I cannot understand the posts that want no growth, we have been growing since Adam and Eve.  The lots on Big Pine Key that were sold to folks years ago for them to save and build a retirement house should be open to building and they should be able to fulfill their dream.  The overwhelming vote at the meeting was for joining the 21st century!

[Two-to-one against chain stores and for continuing our rural flavor] I don’t know what meeting you attended, but when the vote by a raise of hands was called for by committee chairman Jim Cameron it was overwhelmingly against the restrictive Formula Retail Ordinance by at least 8 to 1.  Lying or wishful thinking won’t make your dreams come true.


I'm still laughing at the sight of the PETA wacko fighting off a Pit Bull with a carrot!
[Advertising on Bigpinekey.com] ...I know of no greater bang for the buck than your web site. Most every one can afford; or I should say most business's can't afford not to be on it. --Coconuts Lounge. (Ed: Thanks Joe.)
[I want to build as many houses as I can before they crowd us out] The key words were "crowd us out", meaning to destroy what's left of the Keys. You must be one of those blood sucking developers from Yankee town, right? We locals don't want another Levittown here, we want the Keys the way they are. I'd love to see a building moratorium for five years. Maybe then you profiteers would find some place else to destroy. Try Mexico or Cuba.


This morning I went out for my weekly breakfast splurge and found both the Cracked Egg and the Coffee Shop closed. I was so hungry even an Egg McMuffin would have tasted good. I settled for a gallon of gas. It didn't taste nearly the same.

Sunday February 26, 2006

 

Saturday February 25, 2006

Everyone who is not happy about rising windstorm insurance, check out this website and print off the letter, sign it and send it to our Senator and Representative. It's a local group from Key West.   www.fairinsuranceratesinmonroe.com  We all need to pay attention to this.
We went out to the reef yesterday. Beautiful conditions and fish life. The only negative is all the cardboard bait boxes in the water.  Thoughtless idiots, use the garbage cans at the dock.
Does anyone know the demographics of The Lower Keys and ratio of Blacks per capita?  I have been trying to find a website that will tell the whitest area in America. Island Information> 55 on Big Pine Key
[Girl willing to experiment with me and my man]  What about a gift certificate for a good shrink?

It seems that only real threat, from an Arab company taking over operations of those 5 seaports, is to the longshoremen's union.
How can you complain about the new format of 98.7 already? It's 8 hrs old and it's the only country station in the Keys. If you don't like country, who cares? Shut up. For the rest of us, it's about time.
If there is going to be a ban on anything in big pine let it be on banks and real estate offices.
[one shot iguana] I think it is much more fun to use bait and treble hooks, a # 6 hook works best, then I don't waste my pellets on them; or just one good swing with my driver and I can send the head a good 75 yards. We should have an iguana and land crab golf driving tournament.
[Re: 2 to 1 against the chain stores?] Where you in the same building? There was a clear majority in favor of commercial development of Big Pine.  If there were a hundred people there 75% where in favor of development.
[Cheney]   It's none of my business how many millionaires he shoots in Texas. I say, the more the merrier.





Conch FM. Don't listen to it any more. That ticking was sickening enough.
[I want to build as many houses as I can before they crowd us out and the prices go down] In my humble opinion the above overheard conversation would not worry me in the least  The market is saturated already with far too many houses for sale (fleeing the hurricanes, taxes and insurance) and the prices are going down as we speak, some instances all ready over 20% less, and it will be much more for the have-to sell-crowd. So you sure can't build before the prices go down. 

"Money is cheap" at what banks?  The fed has and will continue to raise interest rates to curb inflation; which in this booming economy is still trying to rear its ugly head.  In this particular market wait till about May and make some lowball offers and I bet they get accepted.  Oh, "and the builders are eager to get the jobs." The hiring pool is nonexistent and most builders are solidly booked for the next two years.  Wake up folks, those weren't two Snowbirds talking it was two idiots. 
Every time a fast food chain is suggested for Big Pine, why is it always McD's or Burger King? Not to say I want the fast food chains here, but there are better establishments out there.

Most of McD's stuff only seems tasty because of the chemicals, (manufactured in Jersey), that are added to the burgers and fries. You could literally coat cardboard with it and make it palatable. Read Eric Schlosser's 'Fast Food Nation'. Also, see 'Supersize Me'. In the DVD extras, Morgan Spurlock did an experiment where he placed McD's food and food from a diner in glass jars and observed the decomposition rates. The McD's food took a long time to break down. In fact, after a month, the fries looked exactly the same. Not a hint of mold. they looked like they were bought that day. I decided that if their food took that long to break down, no more McD's for me. Dirt has more nutritional substance. There are other food chains that are not quite as chemical-dependent. Too bad most of them are out west. (Although Fatburger is slowly making it's way east. They rock!) McD's and BK are for kids when lazy parents want to shove some food, any food, down their kid's gullet (accompanied with a cheesy toy), just to keep them quiet for a while longer.
BP TV? (Ed: Soon come. I just got notice that the new router is on the way.)
[tea to connect with God] Please...there is only one way to connect with God, and that is to believe in him, and believe that Jesus died on the cross for your sin, and rose again on the third day. We have a relationship with God through prayer and only that. No tea, no magic, nothing will bring you close to God except to accept him into your heart as your Lord and Savior!! Let today be your day of salvation!! If you read the bible you also will see where it says God "hates" religion. What you have if you believe in God, is Faith. It is faith in God that brings answered prayers, not some dumb tea or magic powers!! Who comes up with all this trash? Pick up a King James bible. Go to a bible based church. One that teaches straight from the bible. God's words. Pray, humble yourself and see what happens.

All Christians are not bad as some think. Granted some are, so please don't judge all Christians by the bad ones you have come across. We all are not holy rollers. Thank the Lord for the sense not to be! God bless you and have a wonderful day.
More on the Formula Retail Ordinance. In my book the county planning staff let us down on this one. The meeting was run fairly poorly. Instead of looking for compromise or consensus, the county just seemed to fuel the emotions. A lot of what people were reacting to at the meeting was misinformation about the current ordinance, which is poorly written and probably too restrictive.

County and Jim Cameron also seemed to be injecting their biases into the meeting, which shouldn’t have occurred. If there are to be more workshops, hopefully the county will look for middle ground and someone besides a planning board member will run the meeting.

To the ZZ Top look-a-like in the pick-up truck who pulled right out in front of me: Go back to New Hampshire.  You are one freaky dude!
Thank you for the country music station.  It's about time.
[What's next for this President, sell our airports to the Saudis and our nuclear plants to Iran] Or worse, he could give ballistic-missile technology and U.S. nuclear power plant technology to the Communist Chinese government! Oh wait, Clinton already did that. Never mind.
To the person saying "The operative word in Statue #828.12 is cruel death. That was the whole point of the post, idiot.  Someone had asked why a reward for the iguana killer, who shot the animal many times, and it died a cruel death.  Posting the Statute was an answer to that person's ridiculous question.  Exactly how many people out there can make one good clean shot to the head?  Not many, I imagine.  The other operative word here is hunting season.  You can't hunt in Monroe County!
 
It seems you are the one bending the facts to support your opinion.  If I see someone shooting an iguana, or any other animal for that matter, I will call the sheriff's department, and let them decide if it is construed as cruel.  And, no, I am not a vegetarian.  I do eat meat, and I am not totally against animals being raised and killed for their meat, as long as it is done in a humane way.  That is totally different from you jerks sport hunting these creatures in a county where hunting is not allowed.  I guess if a poor iguana wanders into your yard, he is dead, but to go out and look for them to kill, it's just not right.
[Country Music] There's no conspiracy, no plot to take over the airwaves in the Keys.  It's just a local business doing what they need to do, to pay the bills and get by. Isn't that what we're all trying to do every day? 
 
Simply, if you don't care for country music, God put a dial on your radio--use it.  Had Smooth Jazz been a viable and profitable format, we'd all still be hearing it.  Use your brain before you make stupid, idiotic comments unless you want to be mistaken as a country music listener.
Did they have wanderer on the license plate? Besides, Ohio, Michigan, and Indiana are all one place from our perspective. I'll bet no one from Wisconsin ever parked on the bike path.
I saw some idiot "walking" his/her dog while driving their white pickup holding a leash out of the window.  They weren't just idling either. The poor little dog was struggling to keep up.  What if the dog needed to stop?  Would you just drag him?  Whoever you are you don't deserve to have a pet.  If I saw your license plate, I would've called the cops.  If anybody else sees this loser pulling this crap, would you please get the tag number and call the police?





What's up with the Cracked Egg and the Coffee Shop?  Can't I even get an egg around here anymore?
Stay away from the monkeys/apes.  Don't feed or try to pet them.  My nephew learned the hard way. (Ed: a very bloody photo accompanied this message reinforcing his point.)
I say Kudos to the person that wrote in yesterday that said they attended the Formula Retail Ordinance meeting and found it to be a joke.  I totally agree with their comments about the whole scenario with the business owners that got up and made an "ass" of themselves.  I, too, did not vote, so I'm wondering if Jim Cameron had asked the right questions, what the vote percentage might have been?  He is obviously on the side of the business people that were there, since he was the chairman of the group pushing incorporation on us in 2000,  but tries to act like he is totally unbiased...yeah, right.  I agree with another post that said about Jim Cameron running the meeting:  "Should he be running a meeting and expressing opinions on something he may later vote on? Seems like a conflict of interest to me. Shouldn't he stay impartial so as to not taint his vote? Check the code of ethics for planning board members."
 
And you are so right about this looking like the incorporation battle several years back. These people just don't get it.  They can vocalize all they want to, but we'll see if they represent the majority of the voters.  I hope it does go to the people for a vote.
Top 10 wildest, weirdest and wackiest street names. As voted for on the Internet here is the complete top 10 list:
10. Tater Peeler Road in Lebanon, Texas
9. The intersection of Count and Basie in Richmond, Va.
8. Shades of Death Road in Warren County, N.J.
7. Unexpected Road in Buena, N.J.
6. Bucket of Blood Street in Holbrook, Ariz.
5. The intersection of Clinton and Fidelity in Houston
4. The intersection of Lonesome and Hardup in Albany, Ga.
3. Farfrompoopen Road in Tennessee (the only road up to Constipation Ridge)
2. Divorce Court in Heather Highlands, Pa.
1. Psycho Path in Traverse City, Mich.
The Florida Keys have their share of streets named after fish, birds, trees, people and pirates but the oddest thing about our street names are the number of names that are repeated over and over again. There are so many Bay Roads and Bay Drives that you can often find several on the same island. But I haven't seen many weird street names. There is a Transylvania Ave. in Key Largo which is surrounded by streets with fish names.
Do you know of any wacky street names in the Florida Keys?


The Alternative Lifestyle Monkeys have just arrived in Key West!
[Jazz Station] Okay. Well then, just who do I boycott as long as it brings back my jazz station? 
Fascinating comments here about the retail ordinance meeting. One said 80% were in favor of growth and the other said two thirds against. Were there 2 meetings?
Nope. Just two different interpretations.
Has anyone noticed the new sign at a local bait shop? It looks like a small version of blinking Las Vegas. Pretty soon they will be everywhere. Oh, my god, were doomed!


[Country music] Dolly Parton is buying Conch & Steins and True Value. It's going to be a "Dixie Stamped"  Is that anything like a Dixie Stampede?
There has been plenty of recent discussion about something called a Formula Retail Ban. It may help to define what this means.

Generally Formula Retail refers to Retail business (a business that sells a product retail) that conforms to a Formula as to the name, logo, building design and products sold. Most are Franchises but others such as Publix or Walgreens are company owned. Other big name examples are Burger King, 7-11, Office Max or Home Depot.

This type of ban generally does not include business that provide a service such as H & R Block tax service, Holiday Inn hotels, Century 21 Real Estate, U-Haul Rentals or Service Master carpet cleaning.

This type of ban has kept Walgreens from moving into Islamorada even though they tried to get around it by claiming more than half their revenue is from prescriptions which should have their business considered as providing a service.

If a Formula Retail ban is enacted in Big Pine Key it would allow a corporate owned formula business like Bank of America but it would ban a local Big Pine Key couple from opening a Dairy Queen.

You can see all the franchise business types that are and will continue to be allowed to be in Big Pine Key with the ban as it is being discussed. Hotels, Banks, Real Estate, Lawn Service, Accounting and Rental Units. With these business along US 1 it would not make it look different than Anytown USA.

It is possible to enact a ban that is very specific such as only restaurants or banning only corporate owned business or restricting these specific business to one location such as only on US 1. You can read how such bans are handled in other areas here Formula Business Restrictions
They need more police presence at the school zone on U.S 1 in Marathon in the morning and afternoon. People blow through it with no respect for the speed limit and I have never seen a school zone with cars lane-changing as they go through it except for that one. The lady traffic officer that was there up until this year wouldn't stand for it. The new cop just stands by the roadside slapping his hands together. Kind of reminds me of Slappy the clown. 
[Country Music] WPIKn died do to the sale of the radio station.
The meaning of life is truth? You must have gleaned that from reading this web site. It may not be full of love, but most participants seem to spew the truth--whatever it happens to be for them. At least I don't feel like I'm wadding knee deep in BS when reading this page, unlike many other BB sites where the posters think themselves budding authors and bore the bejezus out of you. This site is not only fun, it's enlightening!

I won't go to any of the Chain Store meetings because I don't want the business I frequent to know that I'm against them. Bring all important issues like this to a vote!
Considering the Jews are controlling our government and real estate, the Arabs our ports and shipping, the Orientals our food supplies, tool mfg, auto mfg, etc. and the Mexicans and Cubans our work force, I'd say us Whities and Blackies should get double the Welfare...right?  How hard is it to get to Australia?
Does anyone know anything about what happened to Tommy the masonary/plastering guy? I just heard he passed away and read the obituary. What a shame? What happened? Only 47 years old? Sad. Why isn't his companion and child in the obituary? Please send in any details if a service is planned?









Happy birthday Rob. I love you so much!

Saturday February 25, 2006

 

Friday February 24, 2006
Last night I had a fantastic dream in which I figured out the meaning of life--Truth! Everything boils down to truth.

I'm more grateful that God didn't come into my dream and give me that message or today, I'd become a Christian and start spewing mysticism.


Man, you can just feel the love on this web site.
There was a country station, WPIKN, on Cudjoe for many years.  It died from lack of interest. 
[Reward for the Iguana Shooter]  I hope the guy that shoots the cows for McDonald's never gets caught.  Talk about being in real trouble.  How can you worry about Iguanas and ride by Wendy's, McDonald's and Burger King every day and not whine even a little bit?  You must just eat the fries when you go.
I set my cruise control on 35 going up and down Key Deer Blvd. daily.  I have noticed that about 50% of drivers are idiots who get in my way.  The other 50% are maniacs who run up behind me.




[Arabs running ports] This is such a bad idea, even Ray Charles can see that and he’s blind and dead!

A couple of thoughts about the no chain store argument. Big Pine already looks like Anywhere, USA. Get out of the cities with zoning ordinances that govern how high the weeds get on empty lots before a fine is issued, the subdivisions that say you can't put your garbage cans out before 6:00 pm the night before pickup or after 6:00 pm the night of pickup or get a nasty letter (Key West even has that one) or dictate that you must keep your lot neat and house painted, and oh, yes, dictate the color.

Get out into the rural areas off the interstates, onto the old state highways and you'll see thousands of towns that look like Big Pine. And a lot will look a whole lot better. I say use the developers, control what they build, what it looks like and what kind of landscaping is around it. We've already lost on 4 of the 5 things that were keeping them out and that last one is very shaky and just might not hold up in court. If it goes, any of the chains can come in with no control whatsoever. They don't want to go to court.

If McDonald's wants to come in and clean up the Classic Carpet building I say let them come, but dictate that they put in lots of landscaping so they aren't that visible. Allow a small sign with low lighting, but let them clean up that mess. I said once before that Boca Raton had done that with a McDonald's on Federal Highway and you had a hard time even finding it. Are the rich snobs that live there really smarter than we are (and I did used to live there)?

If everybody just keeps saying, "No, no way" and they want in, sooner or later they will overcome that last point in court and then none of us will have any say over what they do. As for those who keep saying Big Pine is the only unspoiled Key, why don't you buy one of the houses for sale on No Name - no electricity, no water, no telephone, no cable TV? Now, those people really are serious about living in an unspoiled environment.



I have lived in the lower Keys for 30 years.  I think we should allow a couple of big name stores in Big Pine. This might help some of the price gouging going on.
[Country music] Dolly Parton is buying Conch & Steins and True Value. It's going to be a "Dixie Stamped"
[You have a river of iguanas flowing through your yard and flooding your home?] Yes. Uh, oh, start praying and reporting. Decent, determined, clear thinking, resourceful folks who know what needs to be done, are doing it again.
BPK Funny Fridays. Because George Bernard Shaw said, "Life does not cease to be funny when people die any more than it ceases to be serious when people laugh." This quote was inspired when George witnessed a safe fall on someone's head.


My grandmother spends all of her time out in the garden...
because that's where we buried her.

What happened was she fell down in our driveway and she went to press the button on her LifeCall emergency pendant–
and the garage door came down...

In her will, my grandmother stipulated that she wanted to be buried with all her favorite possessions...
and the cat was not happy about that decision.
~Tom Cotter

President Lincoln wore a stovepipe hat. The guy that sat behind him at Ford's Theater only saw the second half of the show.
~David Letterman

So I live in this apartment that's disgusting; it's really dirty. And the kitchen floor is, like, sticky. I had to do something about it, so finally I went out and bought some slippers.
~Sarah Silverman

I'm thinking a mechanic on a jet plane should be serious business, right? Guy in a clean jumpsuit, military haircut, M.I.T. degrees... Not a mechanic mechanic. Not a guy, when he gets the call, that's doing bong hits in the shop 5 minutes before. That's exactly what they sent out; a white guy with dreadlocks... so you know he makes a lot of bad decisions. This guy's on the plane for two and a half hours, the pilot comes back on, "Good news everybody. They say we're ready to go." Who's they? Is the dreadlock guy they? They don't look that bright. Are they coming with us? No. They're going home by car.
~Tom Papa

I called a discount exterminator. A guy came by with a rolled-up newspaper.
~Wil Shriner

I bought an ant farm. I don't know where I'm gonna find a tractor that small.
~Steven Wright

The insurance man told me that the accident policy covered falling off the roof, but not hitting the ground.
~Tommy Cooper

Who invented the brush they put next to the toilet? That thing hurts !
~Andy Andrews

I'm learning to speak Spanish by calling the bank and pressing the number 2 button.
~Paul Alexander

Some men think that they can convert gay women, make them straight. I couldn't do that. I could make a straight woman gay, though.
~Jeff Stilson

The funny thing about driving off a cliff... I bet you're still hitting those brakes.
~Jack Handey

I remember one day I was at Grandpa's farm and I asked him about sex. He sort of smiled and said, "Maybe instead of telling you what sex is, why don't we go out to the horse pasture and I'll show you." So we did, and there on the ground were my parents having sex.
~Jack Handey

A study claims that the relative lengths of the index and ring fingers indicates whether a woman is a lesbian. If between her thumb and index fingers is another woman's nipple, that's an even better indication.
~Bill Maher

God knows that life sucks. It's right there in the Bible. The Book of Job is all about Job asking God to take away pain and misery. And God says, "I can't take away pain and misery because then no one would talk to me."
~Bill Maher

The older that I get, the simpler the definition of maturity seems; It's the length of time between when I realize someone is a jackass and when I tell them that they're one.
~Brett Butler

My mom was a little weird. When I was little Mom would make chocolate frosting, and she'd let me lick the beaters. And then she'd turn them off.
~Marty Cohen

My parents never felt I was good-looking. When they made home movies, they'd hire an actor to play me.
~Ed Bluestone

I like new bands. I like new music when it comes out. So I want to see those bands play, you know? But, I also don't want to be the creepy old guy. Because I know creepy old guy. I remember he bummed me out. I wouldn't blame you for being bummed out by me. I'm not foolish enough to think that I can transcend time.
Then I came up with a solution... The Adult Rock Show. Hear me out on this. The Adult Rock Show starts at 7pm. Yeah... let's get this motherf*cker going. Kick it in the ass, I've got sh*t to do tomorrow. I've got a J-O-B... that's a job, friend.
7 o'clock show- cost prohibitive. No young punks. I'll pay extra not to hang out with some young punks. I think that's fair. 25 and older. I don't need to be at a show with some sixteen-year-old all f*cked up on gin and guava juice or whatever he stole from his parents liquor cabinet and drank in the back of his brother's truck.
Band plays one hour... one hour. No opening band. I don't need to see you struggle through your career. Come back when you have some hits, bro.
Valet parking, I'm home by 9. Alias is on, dude.
Upgrade your merchandise, too. Maybe at this point, I don't need a Weezer T-shirt. I don't need another rock T-shirt. But, you know what I could buy with great confidence? A Weezer Day-Planner. I like Weezer and I like to know what I'm doing on Wednesday. Take home my Audioslave teakettle and my No Doubt toaster cozy.
~Greg Behrendt

At the Retail Ordinance Meeting Did the Editor pass a hat for the web site maintenance fund?
I also attended the Formula Retail Ordinance meeting the other night.  What a joke.  I am not a "No Growth" person, but I do believe that we need to make sure there are certain regulations that protect us from becoming "Anywhere, USA".  From what I saw of the ordinance as it is written, it is ridiculous.  Some restrictions are way too much, such as a type of business can only be replaced by that same type of business (hardware store must be replaced by another hardware store).  I think there just needs to be a limit on the number of businesses and the size of them.
 
It was obvious that the business owners had rallied at this meeting, so, of course, when Jim Cameron asked for a vote, it looked like two to one against the ordinance.  He should have asked for three choices:  against, for, and for with some tweaking.  I didn't vote because I wasn't "for" it as it is written.  Once they get this thing tweaked, it should go to the voting polls as a referendum, so we see what the majority of the people on Big Pine Key want, not just the small minority of business owners.
 
This reminds me so much of the incorporation battle back in 2000.  Some of the loud mouth business owners made it sound like they had the two to one majority for incorporation, but when the votes were tallied, the silent majority ruled.
[Jazz Station] It is being changed because, just like most everything down here that is changed, a couple of yahoos from Boston and  N.Y. come down here and want to make things better for the people in the Keys. Like the other posting said, "boycott the advertisers and don't buy their products or patronize their business."
[Battle of the Local Bands] Aren't we all a little tired of Mustang Sally?


[Mystery planes] They were flying under radar Wednesday night.  Time to go fishing for the square groupers!
To the person inquiring about the wheelchair lifts. Try ThyssenKrupp Elevator. I have been personally involved with them. Their Miami number is 800-683-8888. Their salesman will be able to answer any of your questions.

[Arabs managing American ports] I thought I’ve heard everything since the Red Chinese took over the port of Los Angles. Do we really believe in no discrimination? As far as I know there are no American companies of consequence running the ports of the world and only five major players. They are mostly oriental and after the sale no more British companies. The only Anglo Saxon company is Merick which mostly handles the Caribbean.




I want to protest the use of "dumb" in all those Dumb Blonde jokes.  Just use "blonde", that's enough!

The community meeting Tuesday night concerning the Formula Retail Ordinance was very well attended with people on both sides of the issue giving their opinions and input.  Mr. Jim Cameron, Chairman of the County Planning Commission and District 2 County Commissioner George Neugent ran a fair and unbiased meeting.  At one point a show of hands was called for and the overwhelming majority voted AGAINST the ordinance.  Most people in favor of the ordinance continued to cite fears that abandoning the ordinance will cause unrestricted growth by big chains.  However, those against presented a very compelling case that, due to other restrictions, codes and requirements that simply can’t happen.   Where this issue goes from here remains to be seen but, it was obvious that the majority were not in favor of continuing with the Formula Retail Ordinance as currently written.

[Iguana killers] The operative word in Statute #828.12 is cruel death. A good clean shot to the head or primary organ is not considered cruel. If it was, there would be no hunting seasons. I can only guess the people against such activity are vegetarians, because the last time I checked, meat didn't grow on trees. The other issue in the same post was the word "construed". People have a funny way of bending facts to support their own opinion. I hope someday all the do-gooders for the animal kingdom have the chance to face down a charging Pit-Bull with nothing but a carrot stick to defend themselves with.
Speaking of toilets. Did you hear 98.7 today? I heard a toilet flushing. They flushed their selves. Good.
[Conch FM]   Well, Ed turned us down for a fund raiser and he's still here. There's help out there for a Jazz station also; or you can be gone and Ed will still be here.
Ya, hoo!  The Retail Ord. Meeting was a stand for property rights and hopefully in the years to come I can be proud of Big Pine Key and not try to come up with excuses why it so resembles a third world country. Keep it up folks, this is America and the majority may rule again in the Keys.



[Some sort of primate (spotted on BPK)] That's no primate, that's Phil. You sometimes see him picking up trash on the side of the road. He looks a little scary at times, but he's really pretty laid back.
[Formula Retail Ordinance] Is Jim Cameron still a member of the Planning Board? Should he be running a meeting and expressing opinions on something he may later vote on? Seems like a conflict of interest to me. Shouldn't he stay impartial so as to not taint his vote? Check the code of ethics for planning board members.
[Country music] Yeeeha! Finally some signs there is hope for the Keys after all. Thank you conch FM. Y'all boycott away and enjoy the ride to Miami to buy most anything you will need when you do.

I normally have nothing to complain about as far as “snowbirds” go, but last night one created an exception to the norm. I was riding my bike on the bike path paralleling Avenue A, when I was forced to stop (again, on the bike path) due to traffic, because some idiot had chosen to park his motor home (with attached trailer and car) on the bike path. There was a completely empty parking lot not thirty feet from where he chose to (illegally) park, but instead he chose to park right in front of the “No Parking On Bike Path” sign. No, he wasn’t from Michigan – He was from Indiana.
Fascinating comments here about the retail ordinance meeting. One said 80% were in favor of growth and the other said two thirds against. Were there 2 meetings?
[some sort of primate] If that primate is a baboon, it can rip you apart, no matter how big and tough you are. Also, they carry lots of bad bugs and germs on those two inch teeth. Call the State Animal Control, it's what you pay them for! Same for Iguanas and Carnivorous Snowbirds too.




[The discarded washing machine] Can't they check for prints?
Am I wrong, but didn't Monroe County or the State offer to lend people  Have-a-Heart traps, so they could capture and transport animal pests to a facility or deport them to some other Keys?
[If all the canals were dug out] That would cost a fortune and the boating traffic would be horrendous. Most roadways are not high enough above the water to allow even large pipes to go under them, let alone boat able passageways.  Small pipes would clog up in no time. Let's face it, who ever designed the Keys had one thing in mind, to sell real estate, not to give people a correct place to live.  Just stop all the building, and things will get to their own level. Go screw up the Texas coast!
Play 100s of games for free. http://games.mail.com/ is the wrong web site address. It should be www.congress.gov


[Iguana shooter] I can hit them in the head just about every time from 25 feet. Fifty feet is too far with a pellet gun. You need a howitzer for that distance.
[what in the world flew over Coral Shores Estates..] It was that UFO (Unwashed Female, Obnoxious) from New Jersey!
What's next for this President, sell our airports to the Saudis and our nuclear plants to Iran?

Friday February 24, 2006

 

Thursday February 23, 2006
What a fine turnout for the Formula Retail ordinance meeting. Most everyone there wanted the best for Big Pine Key. I think the thought was to start fresh and try to find some middle ground. In any case, there was a bunch of folks that wanted  some change on Big Pine key. Publix,  Walgreens and parks all seemed to be on the table. They took a vote. The folks that were there, and there were a bunch of them (well over a hundred voted). My guess was that there was 80% for Growth. I think it took the No Growth folks back a little. I am sure that we all will work together to get the best for all of Big Pine Key.
[Who is worse Nixon or Bush] History's judgment is far from being formulated.  Nixon, if it were not for his Watergate problems, might be considered a very good president.  Bush needs Iraq (not Terror) to play-out before the public and scholars will pass judgment.
 
Of course, as time plays on, circumstances and opinions will change.  Let's say for instance that Iraq becomes a model democracy and a U.S. ally in a few years, and all terrorism stops.  Then Bush will be looked-at as a brilliant president.  But, if in a decade after that, oil becomes so expensive that the economy crumbles, and global warming causes so much ice to melt that the Keys, New Orleans, Cape Cod, and Sacramento all disappear, history will re-evaluate the historical significance of George Bush, and perhaps decide that Nixon was better.
 
Of course many other issues could be the deciding points for these evaluations, such as: supreme court appointments and their impact, spying on citizens, presidential power, torture, another war, and perhaps international opinion as well.
Once again Big Piners start on a fruitless voyage.  I sat through the Big Pine / No Name Name Key meeting last evening and listened to many fine people about their ideas and hopes for a better Big Pine. Certainly many of the speakers had very valid comments and all were very polite indeed.

Jim Cameron and Commissioner Neugent ran a very good and controlled meeting and staff members did an excellent job. Notes were taken and plans will be made for another meeting I’m very sure of that. I waited until the very end just to see if anyone would comment on the very biggest concern that keeps Big Pine different from every other Key in the Florida Keys.

Not a word was said about our biggest controlling factors. Fish & Wildlife and DOT. Believe me, people, when I say, these are the two government agencies that will control the future of Big Pine. We all know the strength of both agencies and the power to control them is certainly not on our island. We must be part of their decision making process and take back at least some control of what they plan for our future. This is the very first step in Commercial Big Pine. Also remember that not one of them is truly vested, money wise, in Big Pine and its future; so why should they control it?
It seems that the Retail Ordinance meeting at the Charter school went off as expected even though someone kept doubting that they would have a key to enter the school.

I don't know what all this fuss over Arabs running our ports is about. It's not the A-rabs we've got to worry about anymore, it's the Ruskies. Just watch this season of 24 if you don't believe me. If they show it on TV, you know it's got to be true.
[Arab control of ports] How come that no matter what Bush does I disagree? Except for the tax cut, of coarse.





Talking Dogs, need I say more?
So, Cheney decided to give his interview on the hunting accident exclusively to FOX News' Brit Hume. Hmmmm. "Yeah Brit, lob me some easy softballs." Geeez.

[Like to hear the Doerfel Family Bluegrass Band] Sure we would. Now go to Washington state and turn your speakers up real loud so we can enjoy your weirdo clan's music. Oh joy! 10 kids. Get sterile, Dude.
Thank you Big Pine people for your turnout at last night's Retail Ordinance Meeting. We were two-to-one against chain stores and for continuing our rural flavor. The best thing to come out of the night was that we were willing to talk to each other and maybe work out something that will benefit all of us.
Bush Quote from 2/21. Re: Hiring Arabs to guard the ports. "I want those who are questioning it to step up and explain why all of a sudden a Middle Eastern company is held to a different standard than a Great British (sic) company.
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