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Archives of Old Kudos and Whiners

December 2005

Saturday New Year's Eve 2005




 

The Key West Shuttle will be running to Marathon tonight on a first come, first served basis from 6pm to 2am. Capacity is limited. For more info call 305-293-6426.

Sponging legislation. What a waste of time. There are only about four spongers left in the Keys.
This will take a while to load, but it's fun if you like penguins. Media Player "Happy Feet: Teaser Trailer" - RopeofSilicon.com


Re: Lady with iguana in her house. What an awful experience. First off, having an animal fight inside your living room and then almost getting arrested for it.  What I really want to know is what the hell is a rainstick?
As a person who has used public transportation all of my life, (except here, but will try it)
always be 10 or 15 min's earlier than the schedule.

I hope that the person who had the bad experience with animal control makes a formal complaint.  Sounds like some young brat, probably a volunteer, perceived herself to have a little authority and it went directly to her empty head.  And for one of her “friends” to indulge in vulgar name calling speaks for the mentality of the group.  There must be a responsible adult in charge somewhere who should know what kind of behavior their people are bringing before the public.  You can write off some immaturity in an 18 year old (many of whom today seem to have the emotional and mental development of a 13 year old) but making threats and vulgar name calling goes way beyond simple adolescent behavior.  I would put the complaint in writing and deliver it to whoever is in charge and request that you be advised of whatever follow-up and remedial action was taken.   

I too, take exception to the person saying that there is only a one in a million chance of a rags to riches success in America. And the person saying that is Michael Moore. If you take a random sample of a million people anywhere in America, you will find thousands of success stories, thousands of huge successes, and thousands of minor ones.

Why would someone try to undermine the hopes and dreams of young folks starting out? It takes hard work, and application, sincere dedication to your work and those you're working for, whether it's your job or business. In other words try to have something to offer, instead of just showing up with an outstretched hand - and people will depend on you, and success will come your way, guaranteed. You will meet with overwhelming adversities, but you hang in there, it'll happen. Mike Moore says it won't. He's a goddam liar.


Architects and engineers compete to see whose team can build the most spectacular structure
using little more than cans of food at Canstruction, the 13th annual NYC Design and Build competition in New York. The exhibit at New York Design Center is open to the public. At the end of the competition on 23 November 2005, the 130,000 cans that are part of the exhibit will be given to the Food Bank of New York City. Welcome to Canstruction!

The new Walgreens will occupy the old Scotty’s location sometime between not anytime soon and when hell freezes over.  They are still fighting with the County permitting process and the County Planning Commission over their request to tear down the metal monster eyesore that was Scotty’s and replace it with another smaller, modern, more attractively landscaped building.  A concept that the County bureaucrats seem to find offensive.  Seldom have I experienced worse customer and pharmacy services than I have experienced at CVS.  I now plan my shopping and prescription needs for when I will be in Marathon or Key West at Walgreens.  I would really welcome a Walgreens but thanks to the County I doubt we will see one any time soon.

The stars brought up earlier are not Orion's belt. These stars are much lower in the sky and to the south. Orion rises in the east and pretty much goes across the sky. There is something strange about these southern stars!
St. Pat  didn't ''ride" snakes he ridded the island of them.
About sponging:  I’m not much for restrictions on people’s activities but sponging is an exception.  It destroys the filtration system on the seabed and is a filthy, stinking, pollution creating nuisance on our near-shore waters.  To express your opinions on the activity and register your opposition contact:  U.S. Fish and Wildlife at www.floridafiseries.gov  and Florida Wildlife Conservation Commission   (FWC) at www.myfwc.com    It sure seems strange that the bureaucrats and enforcement zealots get their jaws tight if we trim a few mangroves that grow like weeds, but still allow the spongers to destroy the seabed eco-system.
You can get a complete bus schedule at the chamber of commerce in Big Pine.
(Ed: We've just been made aware that there are two buses running. We only were given the schedule for one bus. We'll Add the second bus schedule tomorrow.)
OK. New Subject. We can do a new one every day about Bill Clinton.
I hope you post those Big Pine Inn pictures, can't wait.
(Ed: The man is sending negatives and I'll get them printed and post them as soon as possible.)
To the: I saw Hendricks and he was on dope.  Hendrix was another of those musicians that didn't get famous until they died.  Believe me, the same thing happened with Jim Croce.  Those of us who were present during those times know the truth. The people who were not alive or babies at the time, got brainwashed into thinking that these guys were good.  Hendricks was awful, and stupid. Croche had one hit.   Hello, the Big Bopper sold more albums then both those guys; and no one knows of him.
I am so sick of people saying that Clinton did nothing wrong.  I agree that there is nothing wrong with oral sex, but what you fail to realize is that he did it in the White House.  That is blasphemy. The point is, take the girl to a Holiday Inn, but do not degrade the White House by doing it in there. How can a man be that sick.  Oh by the way he was married.
Stop the malicious behavior. I can't believe how some of you act. There is death and disease world wide. A lot of the world is homeless without any of the luxuries that I know all of you enjoy.  What happened to: Treat others how you would like to be treated?  To the person in the service industry, smile, say thank you, be pleasant and you will make more money.  To the customer, be nice. If you are a picky person let your service industry person know in a jokingly manner and tip well. Make it worth there while to take extra special care of you.  To all those who are wealthy just remember not everything is so easy for everyone else. I know that a lot of those who are wealthy worked very hard to get there, so try to help someone else who works hard.

And the talking about eating animals from the area, this is not the 1800's where you need to hunt your food.  The lady who fought off the iguana with your doggie,  those from animal control are wrong. You have every right to defend yourself in your own home.  They are out of there minds. They are the ones who give women a bad name. To all those big wigs who think they know they're doing the right thing for the locals, you are way off.  Please everyone grow up. Stop being idiots. Be nice. Help your neighbor. Don't be greedy. I wish all Keysers all the love and hope and help in the world. I wish everyone a happy New Year. Make it a good one.

It seems we have a new topic for the week every week.  The two I remember lasting the longest in 2005 were Captain Pervert from Little Palm and the Black Looters in Louisiana.  We were successful in running Captain Pervert out of The Keys. 
Re: Extra buses on New Years Eve. There is one alternative if your going to drink make adult plans.
Re: Military retirement. Sorry if you think you are getting screwed but having retired two years ago from the Navy after 20 years of service, I totally disagree with you regarding benefits as being unfair. What were your expectations? You won't find a company out there that provides a retirement plan like the military. You did 30 years so you're getting 75% of your base pay. You're also young enough to go out and get another job. You can work part time, earn probably $20K, and match your military income. Naturally, you can do better.

As for VA, I agree it sucks. It took a year and a half to process my disability paperwork. You shouldn't be relying on the VA for medical care anyways. Check out Tricare? It's not the best health plan but trust me, it's a lot better and less expensive than many other health plans. Compare your costs with what a Monroe County employee pays! Congrats on your retirement. You are doing much better than others. Be proud you're a veteran.

Plastic furniture is the norm in the Keys.  Just go to the "Showroom Du K-Mart", like everybody else does. Remember good taste is not an issue in the Keys.  It never was.
"White Christmas" That person who knocks white in white Christmas is called what he is called for a reason!
Franny. You will be in our hearts and prayers forever. I will think of you and the great times we had together. God bless my brother.
To the person with the problem iguana.  You said "To my horror I managed to grab a hollow rainstick that is part of my decor and used it to separate my dog from the iguana and beat it back from attacking me and my dog with it's tail and aggressive biting lunges."  The only reason the iguana was hitting with it's tail and biting was to defend itself, as they are not aggressive animals normally.  I'm really surprised that a 2 1/2 footer would come into your house, especially with a dog barking at it.  That is not a very large one, as I have had 5 footers on my property (and they have never attacked me or my small dogs).  Were you maybe feeding it before, or maybe it was someone's pet?  Wild iguanas won't normally approach people or dogs like that.
 
In the future, you should call Maya at Wildlife Rescue (872-1982).  She has compassion for all creatures and would come try to get it, if possible.  (And then give her a donation, as that is her main funding.)
To the person who saw Hendrix in the early 70's. It must have been in the very early 70's as he passed 9/18/70.
Friday Funnies: the one at the end about the bank is hilarious! It is also pretty much true.

I posted the positive remarks about Parrotdise and no, I don’t own the place nor am I associated with it in any way but as a  customer.  One person answered that disagreed with my comments and they are entitled to their opinion.  For myself, I have always been greeted with a smile, treated very nicely, and enjoyed the service, food and atmosphere.  And like I said, I gladly pay a little extra for the view and lack of two-tooth mangrove rats at the bar.  But to say that the place is “not that clean” is just plain incorrect.  In fact I have seldom been in a restaurant anywhere that is kept cleaner and I’ve been to plenty.  So, we have expressed our opinions and can move along to other world events.  And I’ll be at my usual Friday spot today at Parrotdise.  Stop by for a Holiday cocktail. 

I don't know about St. Patrick "riding" Ireland of  snakes...but there is talk about him "ridding" Ireland of snakes. For cryin' out loud, invest in a dictionary.
Goodbye Mike Palmeno. Remember Mike's Meat Market? We'll miss you.  Condolences to your loving family.
Question: If you are waiting on a ride to a Christmas party at 10PM on Christmas Eve do you wait on the corner or 10 feet back from the corner in the bushes? Not just any bushes but a cactus and cabbage palm. Do you wear all black while you are hidden in the thorny bushes? Does this sound "normal"? Just wondering.



Kwanzaa
beer should be served black!
Is anyone else on BPK having trouble with Cingular lately? There is a tower here and we usually get a strong signal. However, lately when we make a call we can hear them, but the party we called can't hear us. We have called Cingular to no avail. If we can't resolve the problem, we will have to switch carriers, any suggestions?

St. Patrick and snakes:  There is an Irish tale about St. Patrick delivering a sermon that chased the snakes from Ireland.  However there were never any snakes in Ireland to chase.  It is believed that the lore refers to St. Patrick’s many sermons that converted (chased) the pagans (snakes) to Christianity.  Therefore chasing the snakes from Ireland really referred to him converting the pagans to the Christian faith.

Saturday New Year's Eve 2005

 

Friday December 30, 2005

Francis P. Callahan passed away on  Dec. 28.  He worked as a Chef for many of the local restaurants. Viewing is from 10 to 11 am Saturday, 30 December at St. Peter's Church, MM 31.5, Big Pine Key, Fl.  Services will be from 11-12 at St. Peter's. Other details will be known at the service. Please pass this on to others who knew Franny. He will be missed.
Friends of Frannie Callahan. We will gather at Dean-Lopez on Big Pine at 10:00 am on Saturday 12/31/05 with services to follow at 11:00 am at St. Peters Catholic Church. Come let us remember our dear commander.
Doctors Arm neighborhood cleanup. This Saturday at 2pm. Meet at the entrance sign on Matthews.  Bring gloves, trash cans, pickup truck, wheel barrow, whatever you have to help haul away the garbage.  See you there!
I saw Hendrix at the Providence College basketball court where people where literally hanging from the rafters. I'm still amazed at how much music three people could make. I saw him again in Chatsworth, Ca. in the early 70's. He was too loaded that time and didn't often make sense.

Acid rock is almost orgasmic. It elicits so much feeling and imagination.

Sears and Epiphone. I don't think Sears ever sold Epiphone guitars either. They did sell Gibson low end guitars for $14.50 in 1945. My father bought one.
Re: Bus Schedule. I called up to complain because the bus left twice before the scheduled time and the guy hung up on me. It was typical Conch behavior and attitude.


Don't forget the Burn the Blowhard bonfire today at the Chamber of Commerce park from 5 to 11pm.
Bring a piece of debris from Wilma and let's burn the blowhard!
What a bigot complaining about Kwanza just because a black man created it. All holidays were created by someone who had a personal interest.
I have heard fishermen and some other people talk about the stars in the SW sky over a year ago. The talk I heard was more to the south. My curiosity was raised from the moment I heard the fishermen discussing it. They also said it was there and then it was gone. There was talk of Cuba, extraterrestrials, and our own Govt. What could it be? If I had the time and money it would be fun to investigate. God I love this stuff.
I have important information for all Big Pine residents who may be having problems with iguanas. Don't, I repeat don't call your local animal control office for assistance. Thursday afternoon I heard my dog barking furiously at my open front door. It seems the grand daddy iguana of Big Pine decided to enter my doorway. In the scuffle that ensued between my mini-Daschund and this 2 1/2 ft long iguana, every breakable thing in my living room began flying. To my horror I managed to grab a hollow rainstick that is part of my decor and used it to separate my dog from the iguana and beat it back from attacking me and my dog with it's tail and aggressive biting lunges. Egads.

I called Animal control for assistance in getting it out of my bookcase where it had taken refuge from the dog's barking. I was told some sob story about "no truck, no equipment blah, blah, blah. Well, my husband arrived home from work with fish net in hand. We managed to get it into the net and back out the front door. Animal control person "Tia" arrives at this point and announces that she is taking the iguana in for observation and that I will be arrested for abusing the damn iguana with a hollow rainstick as soon as a deputy arrives to do so.

To make a long story short, the iguana ran like a bastard once it got out of the tree where I placed it from the fishing net. "Officer Tia" with her two pierced and tattooed girlfriends (one of which called me a "c**t", now that's professionalism at it's worst. But, hey, they all were 18-19 years old at best) proceeded to tell me that I would be arrested and charged with animal abuse. Yeah, right children. So if you ever have an emergency situation where you may need help from these idiot morons, Don't call Animal Control!


Is there anyone out there who knows where to buy totally plastic furniture? Dressers, chests of drawers, and other furniture for clothing? It would sure be nice after flooding. All that type of furniture would require is rinsing after a flood.
Losing your best friend: So sorry for your loss. We lose the best at an untimely age. The same thing happened to me, so I put his image in paintings on canvas. Just a tidbit of immortality to honor those we love. They are in heaven and will visit from the other side. Keep the good thoughts in your heart.





Re: A giant black jungle monkey put in chains, bought to America, and killed for loving a white woman. Can you guess the name of this new movie? 
Is it Mandingo?
Bill Clinton.  He didn't do anything any other red-blooded man wouldn't have done given the opportunity, time for a new subject to pick apart.
Has anyone heard when Walgreens will start building their new Walgreens on the site were that beat-up old steel building is? And when will Dunkin Donuts be ready for Dunkin? I also understand that the carpet store is moving to the old Napa building. they are the biggest  renters  in the building they are in now. I hope that doesn't stay empty. They may even have the whole building.



Wasn't there something about St. Patrick riding the island of snakes?
If anyone out there is interested in trying to get some legislation started to finally end the devastating practice of sponging and the filth that comes with it, I would be interested in hearing any thoughts of where to start.
While I don't dislike Parrotdise, the comment yesterday sounded a little like an advertising from staff, or more likely management.  The prices are more than a little high, the portions are not at all generous, the staff is not that friendly. and the place is not that clean. But the sad thing is it still one of the top three or four restraints in the lower keys. It does have the best view of any restraint. 
(Ed: That posting was not from them.)

A black man from NC was on the news protesting the term "White Christmas". The black man was offended by "white". What does he want, brown snow? This anti- white crap has gone too far. What an idiot.
Unedited Restaurant Review (After happy hour, we suspect).

80% of people in big pine are not happy the food fron this plase is NO GOOD
NO GOOD NO GOOD
The lady on the bar she is a big BBBBBBBBBBBBBBB
SO ME AS LOCAL MY DOLLAR ARE NO GOOD THERE
GET SOM RESPECT TO PEOPLE
I HELP ROB IN MANY WAYS BUT IN THE END THEY DON’T CARE SO ON AND ON
HAVE AHAPY LIFE AND I HOPE YOU CLOSE YOU SO CALL RESTAURANT JO JO JO


Re: Stars in the sky. If those 3 stars aligned are the ones I think they are, they are part of the constellation Orion. The 3 stars represent his belt. If you're curious about the evening sky, check out http://keyweststargazer.com/  This is an excellent resource for the local, amateur star gazer.
For the bus schedule to Key West check their website at keywestcity.com and go to DOT - the bus schedules are available there.
(Ed: It's easier to go to
Business Directory> Bus Schedule. It's faster and easier to read than the official city schedule.)
End of the Year Thank You. I just wanted to thank everyone for taking the time and trouble to send me "forwards" and "important" news over the past 12 months. Extra thanks to whoever sent me the one about rat crap in the glue on envelopes, because I now have to go get a wet towel every time I need to seal an envelope.
Also, I have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same reason.

Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove toilet stains. I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr. Pepper, since the people who make these products are atheists who refuse to put "Under God" on their cans. I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave because it causes cancer. I no longer check the coin return on pay phones because I could be pricked with a needle infected with AIDS. I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants, even though I smell like a water buffalo on a hot day. I no longer go to shopping malls because someone might drug me with a cologne sample and rob me. I no longer receive packages from, nor send packages by, UPS or FedEx since they are actually Al Qaeda in disguise. I no longer answer the phone, because someone will ask me to dial a number for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore and Uzbekistan. I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or feathers. I no longer have any sneakers -- but that will change once I receive my free replacement pair from Nike. I no longer have to buy expensive cookies from Neiman Marcus since I now have their recipe. I no longer worry about my soul because at last count I have 363,214 angels looking out for me.

Thanks to you, I have learned that God only answers my prayers if I forward an e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes. I no longer have any money because I gave it to a sick girl who is about to die in the hospital (for the 258th time) but that will change once I receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special email program. Yes, I want to thank you so much for looking out for me that I will now return the favor!


I drink on St Patrick's Day. 2 Days later I drink again for St Joseph's Day. This holiday is little known or celebrated. It's 2 days after St Patrick's. It's the Italian celebration of St. Joseph's Day. Here's a man that had a child and never got screwed! I'll drink to that!
Restaurant Review. Never trust a skinny persons opinion about restaurants.
Fat mans' Lower Keys top 10
1. Square Grouper: pricey but worth it
2. Fish Cutters: Great food, best value
3. Little Palm: Best everything, but price
4. Big Pine Restaurant: Ribs
5. Parrotdice: View
6. Coco's Cantina: Thai 
7. China Garden: Great Delivery 
8. Galley Grill: Breakfast
9. Slice of paradise: Pizza, not the best but the best we have
10. All the rest: Never again

If any of you people have been in the Service and think you're going to get great bennies from the government--think twice.  I just retired from the Army after 30 years and got the royal screwing of my life. The Vetrans Affairs and other agencies don't give a rat's ass about you or what you did . Health care sucks and any money you think you are going to get is a dream.  Look deep into your retirement or lose everything.
 
Thank goodness for Alta Vista Translation http://babelfish.altavista.com. I now know that “Me nombre es Santa Ana, y yo toco la guitarra mejor que Santana. Santana es uno mojon!” translates to, “He names me is Santa Ana, and I touch the best guitar than Santana. Santana is one landmark!” Great! Thanks so much for that valuable info.

Now, about the Terry Cassidy/Habitat for Humanity fundraiser/Bluegrass Jam in Feb. Does anyone know the date it’s scheduled for this year?
(Bulletin Board>7th Annual Terry Cassidy Pickin' Party)

I spent many days at the Big Pine Inn during the 1950's. I knew Al and Bobbie Laughlin. I have found pictures of the Inn and their old business cards while cleaning up old stuff from the 50's when I was in the Navy.  Their phone number then was Big Pine No.1. If there is any family or someone who would like the films, etc. Please e-mail me. Back then I supplied many large photos for the bar, etc. Thanks for your time. I'm not sure who contact.
Mike Friedman e-mail: mfriedman10@charter.net
(Ed: Contact us at BigPineKey.com We'd love to have them for our history page. We will publish them so everyone can enjoy a bit of our past. We'll send you an email.)
I thought someone might react to my comments regarding the similarities between St. Patrick's Day and Kwanzaa. I agree that St Patrick's Day is a legitimate "holiday" according to the Catholic Church. If I remember my Catholic School teachings, it's technically a "feast day" rather a holiday. My point was that the observance was seized by Irish Americans to show solidarity and strength in largely Protestant America.

That was the intent of Kwanzaa. The American celebration of St Patrick's Day is a far cry from what occurs in Ireland. As our St Patrick's rituals here are strange and foreign in Ireland, so are our Kwanzaa observances are strange and foreign in Africa. Personally, I like the re-tooling and invention of holidays for America! Can't wait for Festivus to catch on!

I never really cared for the food at Boondocks.  The burgers are O.K. and I had a good salad there once but most of the food is too greasy with smallish portions.  They do seem to pack in the business however so a lot of people must like it



Fat Love
: Hey, Ed, I thought you might attach this picture to one of the comments about a local watering hole.
For night sky info, check this out:
Well I am sure it would be better if Looe Key Bar put a sign up, "No dogs allowed", but that would keep most of the women out too. Right?




Is there any word about running extra buses on New Years Eve from Key West to Marathon? Since they’re putting a DUI traffic stop at MM 55 it will like shooting ducks in a pond without an alternative.

If you can remember past your last booze binge, Looe Key Tike Bar always had allowed pets, but canned the idea because you jerks got nuts with it.  Dog and cats on the bar top, not picking up after them, not having them leashed (a county law) and bringing in dogs the size of freaking horses.  Still, it was better than bringing in your rug rats! 

Talk about sickening.  I was eating lunch in a local place Tuesday when two women came in.  They sat about 15 feet away from me.  Within less than 30 seconds an overwhelming stench of cheap, dollar store perfume descended on the entire area.  It was so strong and vile that I could actually taste it.  Needless to say I was not the only patron covering their mouth and nose.  Of course it ruined my lunch and one person actually got up and left.  Come on now ladies, lighten up on the foo-foo juice.  It’s meant to be applied as a drop or so not by splashing it on a quart at a time.  I guess you don’t realize how disgusting you smell or are you just trying to draw attention away from your huge, fat butt?

Re: Clean Key Deer Blvd Day.  Let’s make it Cleanup ALL of Big Pine Day. I have picked up a black trash bag per day since it was suggested. Pick a day or a weekend and I’ll be out there.







The official beer of Kwanzaa.

Re: How do you clean iguana? What part do you eat? The tail meat is the most edible and generally preferred.  However, some people prepare the whole animal after it has been beheaded, entrails and rectum removed and skinned.  I have only eaten the tail meat once in the Bahamas and it’s nothing to rave about.  For those people it’s just another food source where food sources are sometimes hard to come by.  And, by the way, it doesn’t taste anything like chicken.  It tastes like, well, iguana and what ever else you cook it with.

I have heard that Looe Tiki Bar has been sold.  Is that true?  Did the sale include the roach motel and dive shop or just the bar?  Does anyone have the facts.  I have refused to patronize the Tiki Bar because I didn’t want to contribute one cent of my money to the owner, but if the place has new owners I would probably go back.  What’s the real poop?

BPK Funny Fridays 2005 Last Laugh edition. Because after a year like this, we should all resolve to laugh more. Personally, my New Year's resolutions are the same every year...

Restrain myself from becoming a workaholic.
Avoid the lure of a vegetarian lifestyle.
Curb the temptation to switch to non-alcoholic beer.
Resist the urge to clog my driveway with a slew of luxury automobiles.

I have yet to break a single resolution, as evidenced by the fact that I am currently typing this on what should be a workday... eating a bacon cheeseburger, (with a side of bacon), chased down with a Budweiser, (with a side of Budweiser)... and gazing out the window upon my 1992 Dodge Caravan.
I think it was Thoreau who spoke of building your castles in the air, then putting the foundations under them. I've simply chosen to make my air-castles accessible with a stepladder or an upside-down milk crate.

 

You can tell a lot about someone's personality by how he orders coffee. "Decaf please, skim milk, no sugar." That's the kind of guy who goes through the car wash wearing a seat belt.
~Margot Black

I got an "A" in philosophy because I proved my professor didn't exist.
~Judy Tenuta

Faculty: The people who get what's left after the football coach receives his salary.
~Henny Youngman

One of my big fears in life is that I'm going to die and my parents are going to have to clear out my apartment and find that porno wing I've been adding on for years. There'll be more than one funeral that day.
~Bill Hicks

My wife and I had an amicable divorce. She lets me see my stuff on weekends. Last Sunday I took my sweaters to Disneyland.
~Craig Shoemaker

Divorce comes from the old Latin word divorcerum, meaning "having your genitals torn out through your wallet." And the judge said, "All the money, and we'll just shorten it to 'alimony'."
~Robin Williams

You moon the wrong person at an office party, and suddenly you're not "professional" anymore.
~Jeff Foxworthy

A friend of mine runs marathons. He always talks about this "runner's high," but he has to go 26 miles for it. That's why I smoke and drink. I get the same feeling from a flight of stairs.
~Larry Miller

I'm the youngest in my family. I was always getting beat up by the two oldest: Mom and Dad.
~Tom Cotter

My dad's hearing is gone, and he won't admit it. When he reads, he goes, "What?" The mind is slowly following. He called me up the other night, very excited. He says, "Jonathan, when I get up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night I don't have to turn on the light; the light goes on automatically. When I'm done, the light goes off automatically." I said, "Dad, you're peeing in the fridge and it's got to stop."
~Jonathan Katz

If homosexuality is a disease, lets all call in queer to work. "Hello, can't work today. Still queer."
~Robin Tyler

I'm in favor of gay marriage. Then at least both people are excited about planning the wedding.
~Jay Leno

I have French doors in the bedroom. They don't open unless I lick them.
~Judy Gold

I wanted to buy some carpeting, you know how much they wanted for carpeting? $15 a square yard! And I'm sorry, I'm not going to pay that for carpeting. So what I did, I bought two square yards, and when I go home, I strap them to my feet.
~Steve Martin

Frankenstein was a strange monster. He never caught any black people. No Mexicans, either. He only went after very scared white people. He never went into the ghetto. A black guy with Nikes would have run circles around his ass. "Yeah, come on, Frankie, bring your green ass over here." If Frankenstein went into the barrio, the Mexicans would have taken those bolts right out of his head. "Well, thanks, man. We need that sh*t for our tires, I'm glad you showed up. My wheel was loose."
~Paul Rodriguez

I'm walking to work this morning, and I see one of those mime performers. So the mime is doing that famous mime routine where he's pretending to be trapped in a box. And, he finishes up and, thank God he wasn't really trapped in a box. And I see on the sidewalk there he's got a little hat for money. So I went over and I pretended to put a dollar bill in his hat.
~David Letterman

The relationship between mothers and children never changes, and that's because no matter how rich or powerful you are– your mother still remembers when you were three and put Spaghetti-Os up your nose.
~Dennis Miller

I was walking by a drycleaner at 3 a.m. and there was a sign that said 'Sorry, we're closed.' You don't have to be sorry. It's 3 a.m. and you're a drycleaner. It would be ridiculous  for me to expect you to be open. I'm not gonna come by at 10 and say, "Hey I was here at  3 a.m and you guys were closed. Someone owes me an apology."
~Mitch Hedberg

If you had a friend who was a tightrope walker, and you were walking down a sidewalk, and he fell... that would be completely unacceptable.
~Mitch Hedberg

My mother, from time to time, puts on her wedding dress. Not because she's sentimental. She just gets really behind in her laundry.
~Brian Kiley

I'm broke. Ever get so broke that the bank starts charging you money for not having enough money? That's f**kin' broke, man. Bank called me up, they're like, "Yes, we're calling because you don't have enough money." I'm like, "I know." She's like, "Sir, you have insufficient funds." I'm like, "Well that's a good way to put it, too. I agree with that. I find my funds to be grossly insufficient. Thanks for calling. Why are you mad at me? How is this something I'm doing to you?" She's like, "Sir, you only have twenty dollars... that's not enough. You can't only have twenty dollars." I'm like, "Look, I'm not being broke just to f**k with you. I just really don't have any money. I'm not trying to be a d*ck. My life is sh*tty."

So they charged me fifteen dollars. That's how much it costs to only have twenty dollars. Here's the f**ked up part... now I only have five! When you only have five dollars, you can't even get it out of the bank. They have no fives in the ATMs. You can visit your five dollars. You can call it up on the phone. You can transfer it to checking and back to savings...
So, I have to go in the bank to get it out, and the teller says that I don't have five dollars any more. She says, "Because of your insufficient funds, we had to charge you another fifteen dollars for only having five dollars."
Now I have negative-ten dollars! That means I don't even have "no money". I wish I just had nothing, but I have less than that. I have "not-ten dollars". If something's free, I can't f**kin' afford it! I have to raise ten bucks to be broke.

But, when you're rich, the bank pays you for being rich. If you have a lot of money, they give you more money. They say, "You have so much money that... we should give you some. Because you have a lot, you should have more. Here! Take more money! Take this guy's fifteen dollars. F**k him... you should have it!"
~Louis CK

Happy New Year, Piners! I'm off to find a designated sucker... er... ah... driver for New Year's. Keep it safe out there.

Friday December 30, 2005

 

Thursday December 29, 2005

Today I lost my best friend.  He was way too young and I am hurting badly.  He helped me get through the last three years which have been the toughest of my entire life.  We worked together and we were definitely "brothers from different mothers".  I will miss him badly.  He always told me his father would say, "Son, we are not here for a long time. We are here for a good time."  He enjoyed life. He, despite being younger than myself, taught me much about life and about myself. And he had a good time!  He never had a disparaging word to say about anyone and anyone who knew him, loved him.  I loved him. I hope there is fireworks and good fishing where you are now my brother.  God bless you Frannie. Your brother.
You can cook Iguanas the same as you can key deer. You can't tell the difference.
Congratulations Aimee Klimowicz from a 30 year Marine Corps retiree.
Where the sam-hill is the goldang bus schedule to Key West? I looked online last night and Monroe County is making no effort what-so-ever to publicize it to anyone.
(Ed: Try our popular business directory for the Bus Schedule.  http://www.bigpinekey.com/Pages/business_directory.htm )
Parrotdise musicians are not from Ohio, they are graduates from Ohio University. Actually, one told me he was from Boston.  Remember  the statement was, "a great Jamaican band."  Again, hello, they are not from Jamaica.
Re: Dogs. I am truly sorry and stand corrected. Dogs are definitely much smarter and deserve the respect they get as opposed to the idiot who doesn't want them at the Tiki Bar with them.
I don't remember Sears ever selling Epiphone guitars, Silvertone amps and guitars, yes. But if I may correct you, Epiphone was not Gibson's lower end guitar, but rather was considered their elite line until it was sold to the Japanese manufacturing market. 

The American made Epiphones were highly sought after. The top of the line was the Al Caiola Custom, which sold for almost $1000 (wow--today's market that would be maybe $7000).  They had a Silvertone guitar that had a built-in amp in the guitar case. That would probably be pretty collectable today.  I remember getting one of those amps, how exciting it was to have a piggy-back amp with such shear power!  I finally got a Gibson Melody maker with two pickups and was fortunate to get a Fender Twin shortly after that.  Come to think of it, the combination of a Gibson Guitar and a Fender amp is what is still use today.

Is it just me or is there something a little weird about someone with 10 iguanas in their freezer?
A very cool photo. For more stuff from Hubble telescope, check their web site, http://heritage.stsci.edu/index.html   This is Hubble's official site, full of amazing photos. the picture at left is from the "Hubble art" section of site where artists merge photos into art. New photos monthly. Truly far out stuff.

About Parrotdise and prices.  Yes, they are higher priced than some of the other eateries around.  But, I would rather pay a couple of dollars more for my meal and enjoy the beautiful view, the good service, generous portions, the squeaky clean surroundings and friendly staff rather than tolerate some dark, dingy bar with marginal food, irregular service and a dirty atmosphere.  And, by the way, I believe they offer a discount to locals.  For my money I say Kudos to Parrotdise, keep up the good work. 

Re: Who is going to serve us at all these new places? How about the same way Marathon does? They bus them in with our tax dollars.

Everyone should stuff a beer in the mailbox for the dude that decorated his house on 1249 Ave. B on Big Pine that came in 3rd place. What a splendid effort that did not go unappreciated. Thanks.
Just got home from Boondocks.  What a disappointment again. The menu says a pound of peel and eat shrimp (16-20)  Why then, would I receive only 9 medium sized shrimp and at no way near a pound?  When I questioned the serving the server was all bent out of shape.  "Give Ma another one of those pounds" was yelled into the kitchen.  Tuna was ordered extra, extra rare.  Explained like, "put on, flip, flip and done--just seared."  It came out barely even pink--very well overcooked.  Obviously not as ordered either.  Unfortunately I did not remember that the last two times there the same type of service was given.  Sorry to say I hope that I always remember that I should not forget and show up there again. 
 
I should have just gone to the great Square Grouper.


Me nombre es Santa Ana, y yo toco la guitarra mejor que
Santana. Santana es uno mojon!
Spongers cleaning sponges.  Thank god we finally have someone worrying about the spongers now. Get a friggin' life for God's sake.
I loved my friend. He loved all of us. Shared a small part of his life and I wouldn't have changed that for the world. I wish I was there to help my other friends get through this time of pain. Franny, you're the one who really showed me what to play for.      
Re: Looe Key kennel. What I hear on the coconut hot line is that the new owners and his new management team will be turning the bar and restaurant into a place friendly to tourist and the general public not just a private club for the former staff and friends and new puppies. There will be new faces and I find that exciting. What goes around comes around, but when you live here it does not seem to take that long to see the ending. Happy New Year folks .
I take great exception with the person who believes that only one in a million can be successful by working hard.  While working hard is no guarantee of success, hard work and a little smart risk taking; and anyone can become successful.  

The other question to ask is what do you think of as being a success? To some it might simply mean not living from pay check to pay check. To others it means amassing an amount of wealth so that you can live off of investments. I have seen some with an incredible amount of monetary wealth but always striving for more.  The bottom line is any one can become wealthy if they make it a priority.  And most importantly everyone's concept of success is not the same. 

There is no comparison between the totally fake, make-believe for self-profit, history of Kwanzaa and the true history of St. Patrick’s Day

The person who was St. Patrick, the patron saint of Ireland, was born in Wales about AD 385. His given name was Maewyn.  At 16 he was sold into slavery. He escaped after six years and went to Gaul where he studied in the monastery for twelve years. His wishes were to return to Ireland to convert the native pagans to Christianity. Patrick, having adopted the Christian name Palladius, was appointed as second bishop to Ireland. He traveled throughout Ireland, establishing monastery, schools and churches which would aid him in his conversion of the Irish to Christianity.  His mission in Ireland lasted for thirty years. After that time, an elderly Patrick retired to County Down. He died on March 17 in AD 461. That day has been commemorated as St. Patrick's Day ever since.

Much Irish folklore surrounds St. Patrick's Day. One traditional icon of the day is the shamrock. This stems from a bona fide Irish tale that tells how Patrick used the three-leafed shamrock to explain the Trinity. He used it in his sermons to represent how the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit could all exist as separate elements of the same entity. His followers adopted the custom of wearing a shamrock on his feast day. Though originally a Catholic holy day, St. Patrick's Day has evolved into more of a secular holiday.  The St. Patrick's Day custom came to America in 1737. That was the first year St. Patrick's Day was publicly celebrated in this country, in Boston.  Today, people celebrate the day with parades, wearing of the green, and drinking beer. One reason St. Patrick's Day might have become so popular is that it takes place just a few days before the first day of spring. One might say it has become the first green of spring.

I don’t think that anyone has any reason not to celebrate their heritage.  It’s just a shame this Kwanzaa celebration is based on one mans fantasy, self-promotion and ego. 


Re: Lieutenant Aimee Klimowicz. May I add my congratulations and admiration.  If possible, please provide us with the details about the incident that led to this award. I'd like to see the official write-up if it is available.
Ever notice that what is considered "normal" in the Keys is considered to be at least three standard deviations from the norm anywhere else? That holds true for people, places and things down here.
Bill Clinton sucks.  Not Monica.
To the person asking the question, "Why was Clinton a sex pervert?" I must ask you, for gods sake man did you just move here? He is a male and he had sex with a female. Cheeze.
Every holiday is a man-made invention.  Holidays do not occur in nature.  It's one of the good ideas man has had, but, as usual, it gets taken to excess.  Pick the ones you'd like to enjoy, disregard the rest, but allow others their own choice, too.

Spongers and other dirt bag waterway polluters:  The FWC would rather harass local recreational boaters for miniscule violations than go after the spongers and derelict live-aboards.  While the spongers strip our sea bed of the natural filter system (sponges) and dump the offal into the water they, along with the bums who populate the half sunken, derelict boats, also dump all of their waste, garbage, sewage and who knows what else into the water as well. 

Citing the spongers or the derelicts (who, by the way, aren’t likely have any required safety or navigation equipment) wastes their precious time because it produces no revenue. The spongers and the bums just go away, don’t pay their fines or show up for court.  It’s easier to pick on the guy with the $40,000 pristine weekend recreational boat and whack him with a heavy fine because one of his fish was a half inch short or his flares were a week out of date.  This guy pays the fine that fattens the coffers of FWC.  “How about a little enforcement?”  Don’t hold your breath!

To the Iguana eater:  Like many reptiles, Iguanas are known to carry salmonella.  Be very careful about proper cleaning and handling.  Be sure to bleach and scrub preparation surfaces when done and wash hands frequently while cleaning and cooking.  Personally I’d rather go to a Wendy’s at Winn-Dixie.


A giant black jungle monkey put in chains, bought to America, and killed for loving a white woman. Can you guess the name of this new movie?
A really good Iguana stew.

2 lb Iguana tail meat only chunked in 1” pieces          1 Onion, med, coarse dice
2 c Celery, chopped, incl. greens                             1 c fresh Lima beans, soaked over nite
3 Potatoes, diced about ¾”cubes                             4 tbsp. Butter
8 oz canned potatoes halved                                    ¼ c diced green onion
1/2 c Parsley, chopped                                            Salt & pepper to taste

Melt butter in frying pan and brown meat on all sides (add more butter if needed).  Remove meat. Add onion and celery and sauté to soften.  Do not caramelize.  Add 2 quarts water and bring to a boil. Add meat and all remaining ingredients. Cook slowly for 45 minutes or until iguana is very tender. Season with salt and pepper.  VARIATIONS: For a thicker stew, after browning iguana, make a roux with butter and flour then add water.   Try adding 1/2 jigger of good sherry to stew when serving.
(Ed: For a printable version go to our Recipes Page:
http://www.bigpinekey.com/Recipes/recipes.htm )



If you knock on the
Devil's door long enough somebody's going to answer.
I think we should all ban together and make a "Clean Key Deer Blvd Day".
How do you clean iguana? What part do you eat?


If Kwanza is similar to St. Patrick's Day, then what color of beer do the bars serve on "Kwanza Day?"
To the guy who likes fatties. Good for you.  Some of us girls like fatties too, but it isn't on their face or their belly. This is probably why your mates are Heifers; because you lack the goods, the looks and the cash.  Moo on you!
Two Thumbs up for Dustin at D & R Island Tech for a quick oil change at a reasonable price.  Very good service and they're right down Industrial Road in beautiful Big Pine Key.  Thanks for being here Dustin and Ron. 




Does anyone know what the stars are, looking SW of Big Pine about 6pm? It looks like one big star, but with binoculars, its 3 stars in a row. It's not there by morning. Interesting to find out what that is.

Thursday December 29, 2005

 

Wednesday  December 28, 2005



I would like to add a good comment about Key Deer Bar.  I went in Christmas evening for a drink and saw turkey dinners coming out of the kitchen.  I ordered one and it was very good.  Plenty of turkey, real dressing and real mashed potatoes with good gravy.  It also had a nice salad and cranberry sauce.  It was a very good dinner.

Kudos to Lieutenant Klimowicz. 
The musicians at Parrotdise are not from Ohio. They are from all over,  but the electric violinist, Brady Thomas is a Music & Composition Graduate from The Ohio State University. He is a composer and has played with many symphonies from the mid-west to New York City. Parrotdise does have really great musicians that bring new and different sounds to the Lower Keys.
I have to say there is something to be said for a well rounded Woman with large rosy cheeks!
Guitar deal. I wanted a cheap acoustic guitar as I usually play the electric. I got a Vinci acoustic guitar with a cutout body for Christmas. It is the best deal I've seen in a long time. Vinci is made in China by Washburn Guitar Co. The quality is swell. The workmanship is surprising. I am quite amazed. It was bought online at Sears.com for only $169. It came with a quality gig bag (better than the one I already have) a built-in electronic tuner. Electric pickup, cord, pics, strap and a CD on how to play. Once I changed from bronze strings to thin nickel strings--it rocked and is real easy to play. Mahogany back and sides. Spruce top. Rosewood neck and bridge.

It reminds me back in the old days when Sears used to sell Silvertone and Epiphone guitars. Epiphone was Gibson's cheap model for the masses. I think Vinci is Washburn's cheap model for the masses.

I'll donate the music lesson CD to the library if any of you beginners want to borrow it.

Bill Clinton. It makes you a cheater. Monica was not married. Clinton was.
They let dogs into places like that so people like you will have someone on your mental level to mingle with. Man, that's so wrong to talk about the dogs that way.
Re: Kwanzaa sham. While I don't disagree with many of the facts of yesterday's writer, I wonder what the intent was when he wrote his views a la Michael Moore. Whether a sham or not, many African-Americans celebrate Kwanzaa to celebrate their roots and ancestry. Is that bad? Is it stupid to do so? To call Kwanzaa a "sham" is akin to calling "St. Patrick's Day" bogus because the concepts are quite similar. St. Patrick's Day celebrations began here, not Ireland. The holiday grew in popularity in the 19th century because Irish Americans were exploited in largely Protestant America. The St. Patrick's Day celebration here became a show of strength and unity for discriminated Irish Americans. Sound familiar? Kwanzaa's appearance during the civil rights movement to unite African-Americans seems rational. I'm glad the writer of yesterday's Kwanzaa posted his opinion. While I'm curious about the intent, it motivated me to learn something new and equate it to other American holidays that I particularly enjoy. Now if we can only do something about that Columbus Day holiday honoring an Italian explorer who is guilty of genocide.

With all the talk about Dunkin' Donuts, it should be made aware that the "Time to make the donuts" guy, Michael Vale, just died of complications due to diabetes. A veteran of the Broadway stage, film and television, Vale appeared in more than 1,300 TV commercials.
To the person who sees this great future.  Who is going to serve you at these new restaurants?
Re: Maybe I am thinking of Dirty Sanchez.  Nope your just not thinking at all.
Can someone post some good iguana recipes?  I have over 10 in my freezer and want to put them to good use.
Recipes>Iguana Soup

I don't know much about guitar playing, but I can tell you this, I once saw a bass player for one of our local bands running across the stage, playing his guitar behind his back, not missing a lick, all the while looking at me with this big smile on his face, my jaw about hit the floor, that man is amazing!

Comcast also gave me just 3 days credit. I called them and told them it was out for 2 weeks and they gave me the credit.
Regarding the latest piece on Michael Moore hates America spin. I am fascinated that we have minds among us with such amazing insights, such brilliance, pure genius; however, one thing puzzles me, what does he mean when he says he comes across like an "aw shucks Mn. Wis. boy?
I passed Spongers cleaning sponges in Pine Channel this morning.  I had forgotten just how vile rotting sponge innards smell.  If I regularly dumped any sewage or any other waste into the water on a regular basis I would be arrested for a major dumping violation.  Commercial use of the causeway is currently illegal.  How about a little enforcement?
Michael Wilson never edited, or cut and pasted anything in his film to deliberately manipulate and lie to his audience. That is Michael Moore's stock and trade. That is the point of Wilson's film. Moore does nothing but.

"Wilson's not a strong enough film maker to realize bla, bla, bla..."  Sounds a little elitist. And what hypocrisy? "Bizarre round-up of 'experts'?" What the hell are you talking about? When did Wilson ever present anyone as an expert? They're only personalities expressing opinions. Cogent ones.

If you think that Moore can present less-than-half-truths and still maintain credibility, (if he ever had any), then I have to think that you have a general misunderstanding of life. It would behoove one's self to have a tenacious adherence to the truth when one is accusing others of lying.

If I went around this country telling poor folks that trying and working hard in this country won't get you anywhere, so don't try, (because that's exactly what Moore told Brian Lamb on C-SPAN), would you say that I have a right to tell them that, but that I really shouldn't?  "And so in this chapter, I just wanted to, like -- you know, just grab my friends out there and say, Stop believing this myth that began with Horatio Alger that anyone in America can make it. Anyone. It's what's so great is that anyone can go from rags to riches. This -- while it happens occasionally, while there's a one-in-a-million chance it will happen, that's exactly what it is, a one-in-a-million chance. And it probably isn't going to happen to you"

Moore is a sneering cynic, a manipulative hate monger, and a lying propagandist who doesn't help a goddam thing, and who gets a free pass. He reminds me of Joseph Goebbles.


That pinnacle of social values and good character, the Rev. Al Sharpton, once said that Kwanzaa was created “to de-whitenize Christmas.”  That about says it all.   

To those at Parrotdise the food has always been excellent. My only complaint is the recent price increase. Two dollars additional for the same Dolphin Rueben? I believe I can speak for most locals that it’s ok if you raise your prices for the seasonal clientele but how about not biting the hand that feeds you throughout the year?




Re: Clinton was a liar and a sex pervert. How was he a sex pervert?
Big deal out of Christmas: Yes I agree about too much gifting. My sister has given each of her boys $1,000.00 worth of toys and entertainment each year. For three boys, that's $3,000.00 a year. Birthdays are almost as bad. Now that they are old enough for college, she has had to take out loans to pay tuition. Hello?
They've started work on the ball field parking again. This time they've put yellow caution tape on their barricades. I wonder how many men it took to do that. Way to go guys.
One person's home insurance in Pasco County went from 6,000 dollars to 15,000 dollars for a 325,000 dollar house. What is the gang of three doing about affordable housing for people who live here already. Their silence is deafening. Call, email, do something.


Lieutenant Aimee Klimowicz. Congratulations! Keep your head down, and get back to the Keys safe.  From a Big Pine Retired Veteran (25 months in country, Iraq and Afghanistan).
Back to Smartypants. It is Dunkin' Doughnuts, they realigned it as "Dunkin' Donuts" so they are the same amount of letters on the boxes, but if you look in the dictionary, which it looks like your not used to doing, "doughnuts" and "donuts" are the same, and on the same line. I love confusing idiots because it isn't hard. But I see why, after the photo of your girl friend chowing away at her third dozen doughnuts! 
 
Realign: Change something to fit situation: to alter or change something to fit different circumstances.
 
I believe that this is the definition you are referring to, right? Are you saying that they are using "Donuts" just to fit on the box, but the name really is Doughnuts? Is the trademarked name "Dunkin' Doughnuts" or was I correct in saying the name is "Dunkin' Donuts"? What about the name "Krispy Kreme"? Neither krispy, nor kreme, appear in the dictionary~so in your convoluted logic the name does not exist, or is it really "Crispy Cream"? So why are all these names registered and trademarked if they really aren't the name at all?
 
p.s. Your is really you're-a contraction of you are. And how do you know the picture of "my girlfriend" is really not a picture of me?




Smile. It improves your
face value.

Wednesday  December 28, 2005

 

Tuesday December 27, 2005



Lieutenant Aimee Klimowicz of Cudjoe Key was awarded the Army's Bronze Star for service in Operation Iraq Freedom. Go Aimee. We're all very proud of you.
Blue Cross Health Ins. just went up for us $977 every two months. (We're 60 and 54 years old.) And it's lousy insurance with maxed-out deductibles and minimum services. It now costs us $2,800 every two months! I only hope that I can hold out until Medicare kicks in when I'm 65.
Thought for the day. Babies and birds have similar finger reflexes. If you put a finger near a baby's hand or a birds chest one will always grab it and the other will always climb on it. (I have a lot of spare time to think about this important stuff.)

I stopped at Key Deer Bar and Grill yesterday with a couple of co-workers for a late lunch.  We were done for the day and were able to enjoy a couple of beers too.  My burger was very good and so was the two meals served my friends.  They had no complaints.  The service at the bar was prompt and friendly and our beers were served in cold mugs.  I guess they might have an off day from time to time but we found it pretty good.

Regarding the horrific situation taking place at Venture Out on Cudjoe Key concerning the advertising of their pancake breakfast. At least we can take comfort in the fact that in the middle East people are getting blown to smithereens and other parts of the planet natural disasters ala tsunamis and in New Orleans almost total annihilation, we do, indeed have our own set of problems here. Paradise comes at a price.
Re: Looe Key Tiki Bar to Kennel. They let dogs into places like that so people like you will have someone on your mental level to mingle with. Your mental health may be questioned by the health dept.
Re: big deal out of Christmas.  Why don't you just stick a candy cane in your mouth and pull the trigger?
The poem, 'Twas the night before Wilma was awesome. It made me cry.
Looe Key Tiki Bar to "The Kennel."  Great. It seems we have another  good neighbor watching over us worrying about what everyone's doing. Like we haven't got enough Big Brother down here
Amen!  I have multiple Michael Moore books and DVD's, but just to stay abreast to his lies.  He is very talented in editing the truth.  Do a search on Google for anti-Michael Moore and you will be blown away at the amount of outrage there is.
To the person who thinks it's okay for kids to be overweight. May I ask, are you nuts? Do you know that they will forever be affected health wise for the rest of their lives? Diabetes, heart disease, etc. Look around and see how our future generation looks. The majority are fat! Better reform health care since they all will need it big time. Maybe parents should be financially penalized for allowing their children to become obese. If they don't care about their child's health then maybe they'd care about losing some money.
The Jamaicans you heard at Parrotdise the other night were from Ohio!
So someone thinks Bill Clinton is a sex pervert? I think Monica is the nasty one.  Does this make all (or most) men sex perverts?
Who cares if Big Brother is watching? All the big brother employees must have the dullest lives in history. Yawn.
Burning a CD. I am looking for someone to explain to me how I download pictures from email to a disk. I save the pictures to the (D:) drive but it keeps telling me to insert a disk.  I can play a disk from the (D:) drive, but it will not download to a blank disk.
(Tech support: You must first save the pictures to the (C:) drive (your hard drive). Then use your CD burning software to burn to a blank CD in Drive (D:). 



Man, there's a boatload of
rude and obnoxious people on this site.
Re: They should change the name of the Looe Key Tiki Bar to "The Kennel." They let you in, didn't they? Isn't it great to have the anal retentive city people back? Makes it seem like the hurricanes weren't so bad.
"Clinton was also a liar and a sex pervert". Good. I hope he moves to Key West. He'll be right at home, especially if he becomes Mayor!
A thought for the day: "The glory of a nation rests upon the character of her men." --President Herbert Hoover
"I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character." --Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.
"Character doesn't matter."
--President Bill Clinton
If Looe Key Tiki Bar reminds you of a kennel, why don't you just not go?  Why do you want to force your way of life on other people?  Don't you imagine if there are four dogs running around there might be people who like dogs there too?  People like you make me sick.  Find a place that has the things you like and enjoy it, but don't try to get your way at the expense of others.
Comcast has given me a credit equal to 3 days of service for the outage subsequent to Wilma. Is there anywhere on Big Pine Key where Comcast cable service was actually restored in only 3 days? Two weeks later mine was still intermittent at best.


I agree. Those two Reggae guys at Parrotdise are really good.  The one on the keyboard/guitar/vocals and the other on the violin create a really unique sound.  I’d go there just to hear them.  (Parrotdise also have one of the best steaks in the Keys)

Re: "big deal out of Christmas"  If it wasn't for Christmas the toy makers would perish, the junk food venders would disappear and we'd have a hell of a lot more pine trees to give us clean air. Think about it!  
Don't judge Afro-Americans by their poor. The poor of any race are just as bad. Don't let prejudice cloud your brain.
Fatassitosis.  A malady that affects people who have eaten and drank themselves silly the previous year. Symptoms are exercising publicly, usually starting around January 1.
I heard someone on the radio say, 'Let us all remember the true reason for Christmas, Santa's birthday."  Isn't that awful, how are children to learn?

The holiday, Kwanzaa is a sham invented in 1966 by a violent black racist named Ron N. Everett who later changed his name to Maulana Karenga.  His organization, originally called United Slaves, now renamed simply “US” was involved in various violent racial incidents in California.  He went to prison in 1971 for torturing a couple of women with a soldering iron and a vise among other toys.  After prison he somehow got himself installed as the chairman of Black Studies at a California university. 

He won’t explain why the celebration uses words from the remotely used Swahili language when the language used in most of ancient Africa was then and now is Arabic.  Nor will US explain why they use maize (corn) in their “traditional Africa“ celebration.  Maize is a New World plant unknown in ancient Africa.  Karenga concocted a bunch of lore, lingo and mumbo-jumbo to make Kwanzaa look like something out of Africa rather than from southern California.  They claim that Kwanzaa celebrates ”the first harvests of Africa that are recorded in history as far back as Ancient Egypt”  but won’t explain why they would “harvest” during the winter solstice when there are no crops to harvest.  Everett aka Karenga still runs the organization “US” and Sankore Press (an Islamic, not African name) that sells various radical publications as well as Kwanzaa items.  Kwanzaa is just a hoax built around a fake.  By the way, the motto of Us is: “Anywhere we are, US is."

The Howler Monkey is the loudest monkey and the loudest land animal. The only animal that is louder than the Howler Monkey is the blue whale. The Howler's call can be heard up to three miles away. Do not confuse this animal with the local band called the Whistling Monkeys. These folks play somewhat mellow music that can only be heard for fifty feet or so, depending on your hearing acuity and level of inebriation.
It is nice to see that most of us had better things to do Christmas Day. Doug and Kathleen, I enjoyed the "Twas" poem. Will we see the 73 on the road again?
Swimming hole.  And do the whales crap in that water for months and months?  How sanitary is that?  Shall we do a test when the whales are released and see what we have?  Those whales beaching are sick, sometimes with the same thing as chicken pox virus and people put themselves in harms way.  We should all take up a collection or have a benefit for the whales so that we can get something in the area that will house sick whales instead of letting them stay in our canals. 

The people who are dumping are doing it illegally. Let's get a patrol going to check the waters and fine them heftily. 

Brian Wilson, the director of "Michael Moore Hates America", immediately wraps himself in the American flag with his biographical opener, which paints him as an infant-cuddling, "aw shucks" Wisconsin/Minnesota boy who just "don't" understand why a rich New Yorker like Moore would say such bad things about America.

Wilson's film is basically an examination of Moore's interview and editing tactics, which have been endlessly accused of being biased and manipulative. Therefore, it comes as a great surprise when Wilson starts deliberately playing these same tricks, and not in a smart, satiric way, but in a desperate, hypocritical way, while still playing up his deceptive, "gee whiz, I dunno about this Moore fella" personality.

Wilson starts by nitpicking the minutiae of "Columbine" (the sequence where Moore gets the free gun from the bank is a favorite), yet isn't a strong enough filmmaker to realize that he's just reemphasizing Moore's overall point in the process of tearing it to shreds. Wilson invites personalities like magician Penn Jillette (a wonderfully outspoken and articulate man who should've directed this movie), documentarian Albert Maysles ("Gimme Shelter"), and unknown comedian Tim Slagle to chat about Moore and his films, with each interviewee concluding that Moore has a right to say what he wants, but he really shouldn't.

Wilson also criticizes Moore's love for Canada by heading up to the Great White North and interviewing two stoned and homeless Canadian teens for their thoughts on America. How insightful. However, that's not nearly as stupid as Wilson challenging Moore's "Columbine" suggestion that only Caucasians are choosing to live in gated communities to keep minorities out, yet Wilson finds only Caucasians to interview when he visits one of those communities to prove Moore wrong. That moment alone sums up the entire movie with disturbing precision.

"Michael Moore Hates America," for all of its patriotic pandering, bizarre round-up of "experts," and general dream of objectivity, is the exact same type of filmmaking that Wilson is openly criticizing Moore for. Good heavens, the hypocrisy is deafening.



To the Pleasantly Plump woman that went for happy hour and had a "Happy Ending." Are you free tonight?
Re: The Looe Key Tiki Bar, or "The Kennel" as you referred to it. Great, another idealist launching a crusade to transform the Keys into the mainland! Leave us and our dogs alone and go back up north where you belong. I sold a real house and bought a trailer just to get away from people like you!
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year and hopefully all this negativity will diminish in 2006.  Hopefully we will all be able to talk about good things going on in our community. People helping people and animals; what our children are up to and how they are becoming good citizens instead of most of the rubbish I read. Not just here, but in the papers as well. 

Has anyone gone to a good movie or seen a play in Marathon or Key West that was outstanding?

I thought Santana was the guy who whipped our boys at the Alamo. If so, he has been playing guitar for a long time. Or maybe I am thinking of Dirty Sanchez. 
I hated Clinton too, but the slaughter of innocent boys at Waco and the intentional shooting of a mother holding an infant and his lying under oath bothered me more than him getting a BJ. There's nothing perverted about wanting a younger gal to give you a BJ.
I enjoy Rob's Island Grill, and if they did have a hot dog on the menu, I would order it. I do like the lack of riff-raff. The people that say Big Pine Key isn't going to turn into another Key West may be sorely mistaken. All the restaurants are going to eventually look like Rob's. (Let it be the template for all future eateries). I, for one, look forward to the change. None of the beer shacks will be able to afford to keep their places up and running. In the next decade, those people will be trudging back to the mainland; penniless. I say, Kudos to that sunny future!

Tuesday December 27, 2005

 

Monday December 26, 2005

Today is the first day of the seven day celebration of Kwanza. The seven days and principals are:
Unity
Self-Determination
Responsibility
Cooperative Economics
Purpose
Creativity
Faith
To find out how to celebrate in the traditional African way please visit
http://www.melanet.com/kwanzaa/schedule.html
Today is the one year mark of the great Tsunami in Southeast Asia that killed about a quarter of a million people. And I'm all shook up because I lost my truck in Wilma. I should get my priorities straight.
I heard a real interesting duo at Parrotdise the other night. One Jamaican fellow sang and played the guitar and the other man played the electric violin. What a good sound.
Today is Boxing Day which is celebrated in Canada. The day after Christmas, the Feast of St. Stephen, the first Christian martyr, is better known as Boxing Day. The term may come from the opening of church poor boxes that day; maybe from the earthenware boxes with which boy apprentices collected money at the doors of their masters' clients.

Nowadays, we often see, in certain families, gifts (boxes) given to those who provide services throughout the year.

I don't know why everyone makes such a big deal out of Christmas. They've already taken the Christ out of Christmas. Instead it is a time of the year to go broke buying presents for people that you don't like that much; that probably don't like you; and act like you care about people that you could care less about the rest of the year. It is so fake. And those old Christmas songs they play year after year after year--enough already! This is the time of year I hate. Everyone is so phony. It's all a bunch of crap. Why must I be tortured by all of your stupid traditions? I am a white American and I hate Thanksgiving too. That's when we celebrate killing the Indians and taking their land. How bogus. But you are the people that say, "How's it going?" and you don't care. Why do you fake it? Is anybody out there "real" like me?
Clinton was also a liar and a sex pervert.


I just finished watching "Michael Moore Hates America", and was astonished at the blatancy of Moore's lies. The kid that produced the documentary, delivered a gentle, respectful, honest presentation.
As if our Lower Keys were not trashy enough. Now we have some sign posting sales heads sticking "Want a Loan", "Sell yours Now" and other obnoxious signs stuck in the ground to look at. It is illegal people? It is bad enough the realtors do this on every corner, but loan sharks? It's got to stop. The cops could fine the hell out of them (say $1000 per offence) then we locals could have a nice New Years with out fear of the "DUIs for profit" thing.
Main Entry: [1]im·peach
Pronunciation:
im-'pEch
Function: transitive verb
Etymology: Middle English empechen, from Middle French empeechier to hinder, from Late Latin impedicare to fetter, from Latin in- + pedica fetter, from ped-, pes foot
Date: 14th century
1 a : to bring an accusation against b : to charge with a crime or misdemeanor; specifically : to charge (a public official) before a competent tribunal with misconduct in office
2 : to cast doubt on; especially : to challenge the credibility or validity of <impeach the testimony of a witness>
3 : to remove from office especially for misconduct
Re: The Donut Lady.  I can't imagine anything but a Bull Elephant having the equipment to have sex with her.
Re: To the person who said Carrie should put her email address in if she thinks it is her. In your words "This is an anonymous website isn't it?" This is not a chat room.