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Published on Big Pine Key’s garbage pick-up days:
Tuesdays and Fridays.
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 On Tuesday’ CT, an 80-year-old man said I probably couldn’t last 4 hours working in the Sun because I mentioned Americans don’t want to fill the huge shortages in labor and construction. If you read his post he actually strengthened my point.I spent years fracking for gas in the Marcellous and Utica shale wells thru out Pennsylvania and Ohio. Shifts were 12 hrs long in the summer heat and zero degrees temps 6 days a week in the winters. Fracking never stops; rain, shine, winter, summer holidays or not. I don’t think a 4-hour shift using a leaf blower would be harder than pulling water from a frack tank in 5 degrees below zero. Come on down to the oil patch and spend 72 hours a week pulling energy from the ground. See ya’ there! |
| [Feed The Keys 2024] Help UWCK Fill Food Pantries Before School’s Out for the Summer! Did you know that 43% of Monroe County residents live paycheck-to-paycheck, relying heavily on our local food pantries to provide for their families? United Way of Collier and the Keys (UWCK) needs your help to tackle this pressing issue! In honor of our dear friend and former Board Member, “Mangrove Mike” Forster, we are rallying once again for our “Feed the Keys” Food Drive. Link |
Duh Department. |
| [United Methodists Overturn Ban on Gay Clergy] The United Methodist Church’s quadrennial general conference voted 692-51 on Wednesday to repeal a 40-year-old ban on ordaining “self-avowed practicing homosexuals” as ministers. The delegates also barred local UMC leaders from penalizing congregations and clergy that facilitate same-sex weddings. |
 [Chronostasis] a phenomenon in which time appears to pass more slowly than it actually does. A visual example of chronostasis is the stopped clock illusion, which is induced by shifting one’s gaze abruptly to an old-fashioned ticking clock. This action can result in the clock’s second hand appearing to remain stationary for more than a second. Link |
| [Schizophrenia] Just about everyone down here has it. At least all the girls I date have it. Ha! Link |
 Please stop slamming your brakes when you see a cop that has someone pulled over. Unless you are holding a severed head out of your window, he’s too busy for you. |
| [“No one to pick tomatoes”] Someone is a little confused. They read a post on here from last week and claimed the poster said “White” Americans don’t want to work. The original poster never mentioned anyone’s race at all. Why make it a response about race when the post was about American workers not filling construction and food worker openings? Race was never mentioned, but the response was only about race. Every American is not white and that’s not what was said. Playing the race card for no reason was odd. It proves reading and comprehension are not the same. |
 [Young Entrepreneurs] Wesley Kulaga, 17, a student at the College of the Florida Keys Academy, and Blake Kulaga, 13, a student at The Basilica Saint Mary Star of the Sea, have already made waves in the local community with their entrepreneurial spirit. Originally from Tampa, Florida, the brothers transitioned to the Lower Keys about a year ago, bringing with them a wealth of experience in business from running their successful lawnmowing company for five years. With their hard-earned savings and the support of a GoFundMe campaign, Wesley and Blake acquired a state-of-the-art printer capable of producing high-quality labels from the comfort of their home. This technology allows Aqua Prints to offer personalized labels for businesses and events, meeting the unique branding and advertising needs of clients both locally and nationwide. |
| [Friday Joke] Since the coronavirus outbreak, my 47-year-old son has been washing his hands religiously. In fact, he said, “I’ve been washing my hands so much, I found the answers to an old eighth-grade math quiz.” |
 Why writing by hand is better for remembering things. Keyboards still have a place, but if you want to retain information, grab a pen. Link |
| Clever ways to reuse coffee grounds. Transform your used coffee grounds into valuable resources for your home, garden, and personal care. Americans consume an average of two cups of coffee daily, primarily using single-cup brewers, though drip coffee makers remain popular. Regardless of the brewing method, the question of what to do with used coffee grounds persists. These grounds are not merely waste but valuable for various practical, eco-friendly applications. Link |
 [Toll Violation Scam] Be on the lookout for fake texts claiming you owe money for unpaid tolls. Since early-March 2024, the FBI Internet Crime Complaint Center (IC3) has received over 2,000 complaints reporting smishing texts representing road toll collection service from at least three states. IC3 complaint information indicates the scam may be moving from state-to-state, and similar texts have been received by Florida residents. Link |
| [Stormy Daniels] Does anyone know where We can see a video of Stormy Daniels in ‘action’? |
 [Pastrami] (Romanian: pastramă) is a type of cured meat originating from Romania usually made from beef brisket. Later recipes use lamb, pork, chicken or turkey. The raw meat is brined, partially dried, seasoned with herbs and spices, then smoked and steamed. Like corned beef, pastrami was originally created as a way to preserve meat before the invention of refrigeration. One of the iconic meats of Eastern European cuisine as well as American Jewish cuisine and New York City cuisine, hot pastrami is typically served at delicatessen restaurants on sandwiches such as the pastrami on rye. |
| [Friday Joke] Dad always bragged about the gunners on his ship. Once during target practice, an unmanned drone flew past an antiaircraft cruiser. The cruiser opened up, shells furiously flying all around the drone but not hitting it. Then came Dad’s ship’s turn. The gunners’ very first shot sent the drone into the water! Forty years later, Dad met the man responsible, and he told him how impressed he had been. “Yeah, I got in a lot of trouble for that,” the gunner said. “Turns out we were supposed to shoot around it, not hit it.” |
 [Silk and Genghis Khan Conquer Asia] At least until the spring of 1221, Merv, now in Turkmenistan, from which the tiny eggs of Bombyx mori had moved to Persia and the lands to its west, was still a most splendid city. Around March 6 of that year, it ceased to be so.Genghis Khan had taken its golden throne and ordered the city burned to the ground. Its sweet watermelons were no longer cut into strips and dried on its washing lines; scholars put down their pens and abandoned its libraries; astronomers scattered from the observatory; poets forgot their words; and weavers left their looms still interlaced with unfinished fabrics of silk and cotton and ran from their workshops along the still waters of the Majan Canal. All Mongol soldiers were issued a decree from the khan such that each was to end the lives of three to four hundred distraught souls. Link |
| [Diver Dead] A 28-year-old man from Alberta, Canada who was free-diving off of Key West died after being found in the water unconscious Tuesday, April 30. Pieter Lodewikus Botha was spearfishing with others from a private vessel near the Western Dry Rocks area at approximately 4 p.m. when he was found unresponsive on the sea floor. Link |
 The law is the only thing that makes people equal. When it doesn’t Democracy is gone. |
| Scammers stole more than $3.4 billion from older Americans last year. Link |
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 Amazon Prime now has commercials even though we’re paying for ad-free streaming. One movie I watched started with “Thanks to Samsung, the following video is brought to you ad-free after the following ads.” We’re much dumber than they think, aren’t we? |
| [China GPS] I work in a climate tech startup, and although I don’t directly manipulate geospatial data in my role (at least not at the moment), I’m very interested in this aspect of our work. I came across a seemingly innocuous message on Slack about how we had less information for a particular carbon offset project because of the China GPS shift problem. This naturally piqued my interest — I didn’t know Chinese geospatial data would be any different from the rest of the world. Hadn’t this been one of the few areas where we all agreed about the right way to do things? Link |
 [Friday Joke] One day a florist went to a barber for a haircut. After the cut, he asked about his bill, and the barber replied, ‘I cannot accept money from you, I’m doing community service this week’ The florist was pleased and left the shop. When the barber went to open his shop the next morning, there was a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he tries to pay his bill, the barber again replied, ‘I cannot accept money from you, I’m doing community service this week.’ The cop was happy and left the shop. The next morning when the barber went to open up, there was a ‘thank you’ card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door. Then a politician came in for a haircut, and when he went to pay his bill, the barber again replied, ‘I cannot accept money from you. I’m doing community service this week.’ The politician was very happy and left the shop. The next morning, when the barber went to open up, there were a dozen politicians lined up waiting for a free haircut. And that, my friends, illustrates the fundamental difference between the citizens of our country and the politicians who run it. |
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| The current Coconut Telegraph was published on 5/3/24 at 8:53 am. |